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PrintableStillGotIt said: SCNDLS said:  So you say . . .     | |
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iceblue07 said: CarrieLee said: Well it helps significantly but it's just not 100%. Also people can be carriers and not know it...it can lay dormant for a long time. Yes it can lay dormant for years but you cannot pass it on whilst its dormant, only when its active. That's not true. I believe it can be passed through asymptomatic shedding while inactive. [Edited 5/11/09 13:36pm] | |
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CarrieLee said: JustErin said: You people are freaking me out!!
I was just tested 2 weeks ago for everything because I wasn't feeling well. All clear, but damn, makes me never wanna touch another man again. Ok, that's a lie. Dude it's VERY scary!!! I have immune system issues so I am paranoid all the time. I feel like I could contract something just by looking at someone the wrong way! You know, I totally do not understand how I've managed to stay totally std free. When I think back at all the stupid things I have done.... | |
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posted this link earlier, check out the questions and answers...its all there!
http://www.herpes.org.uk/index.html [Edited 5/11/09 13:38pm] Sometimes Life is like the post...You just don't get it! | |
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Ottensen said: CarrieLee said: Slow down? It would come to a screeching HAULT!!!! Condoms aren't 100% effective against herpes or HIV and I'm not willing to take that chance. A friend of mine dated a guy with herpes...his girlfriend at the time had it and he was so "in love" with her that he didn't care and wanted to have a baby with her. Well now they aren't together, she's a douche bag and he's got friends for life...on his genitals.
F THAT. My body is more important to me. Girl, yes.  
Life is hard enough as it is...  Its a deal breaker for me. I'm just not willing to risk it...and then if I break up with that person, I'll probably have to become celibate...may as well join a convent. I would't want to spread it to somebody else. I wouldn't even expect anyone to be willing to risk it.
As for HIV...I will be your support and love you and take care of you whenever you dont feel well, but I'm not putting my life into the hands of a condom which was probably "made in taiwan"....they do fail sometimes. There are a lot babies in this world to prove it.....not to mention the disclaimer. [Edited 5/11/09 13:40pm] Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. | |
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SCNDLS said: iceblue07 said: Yes it can lay dormant for years but you cannot pass it on whilst its dormant, only when its active. That's not true. I believe it can be passed through asymptomatic shedding while inactive. [Edited 5/11/09 13:36pm] this is why I dont understand how so many can be comfortable with "casual sex" Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. | |
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iceblue07 said: posted this link earlier, check out the questions and answers...its all there!
http://www.herpes.org.uk/index.html [Edited 5/11/09 13:38pm] Well I posted a link too and it says this: http://www.herpes.com/Tra...sion.shtml Can Herpes Be Transmitted Without Symptoms? Yes! Sometimes those who know they are infected spread the virus between outbreaks, when no signs or symptoms are present. This is called "Asymptomatic Transmission." Research also shows that herpes simplex infections are often spread by people who don't know they are infected. These people may have symptoms so mild they don't notice them at all or else don't recognize them as herpes. Many genital herpes infections are spread from persons who are asymptomatic "Shedders" of the virus. For those who recognize their symptoms, asymptomatic transmission appears to be far less likely than spreading the virus when lesions are present. Many couples have had sexual relations for years without transmitting herpes. Some simply avoid having sexual contact when signs or symptoms are present. Others use condoms or other protection between outbreaks to help protect against asymptomatic shedding. I'd rather err on the side of caution.  | |
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StillGotIt said: SCNDLS said: That's not true. I believe it can be passed through asymptomatic shedding while inactive. [Edited 5/11/09 13:36pm] this is why I dont understand how so many can be comfortable with "casual sex" Frightening, isn't it? | |
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SCNDLS said: JustErin said: This is a good question and I honestly don't know how to answer it as I've never been that position before. I really don't know what I would do.
I don't think there is anything wrong with having it in the sense that I don't think it makes them less of a person somehow...like it was some kind of mistake they did or something, or that it automatically means they slept around with anyone...that's just ridiculous. But at the same time, I don't want to risk getting it myself. So when you have it, do you only have outbreaks and that's when you're contagious or are you contagious all the time? The answer to that would make a difference to me. You're contagious all the time even when you're not having an active outbreak. That is not true. Someone who has herpes is potentially contagious at all times. We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves. | |
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Genesia said: SCNDLS said: You're contagious all the time even when you're not having an active outbreak. That is not true. Someone who has herpes is potentially contagious at all times. Nothing that I read says potentially but again I'd rather err on the side of caution since that potential is still too much risk and hassle for me. | |
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You know....with all the shit I know we've all read during our life times....its really something to see how unsure many of us still are about STD facts.... Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. | |
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Its a risk you take if you sleep around but it can and does happen whilst in relationships. It only takes someone in the relationship to be going behind your back and bringing back whatever they have caught and passing it on to you! It isn't nice but it happens! Sometimes Life is like the post...You just don't get it! | |
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SCNDLS said: Genesia said: That is not true. Someone who has herpes is potentially contagious at all times. Nothing that I read says potentially but again I'd rather err on the side of caution since that potential is still too much risk and hassle for me. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. | |
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iceblue07 said: Its a risk you take if you sleep around but it can and does happen whilst in relationships. It only takes someone in the relationship to be going behind your back and bringing back whatever they have caught and passing it on to you! It isn't nice but it happens!
 thats it...I'm joining the convent!!!
 Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. | |
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 Sometimes Life is like the post...You just don't get it! | |
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StillGotIt said: iceblue07 said: Its a risk you take if you sleep around but it can and does happen whilst in relationships. It only takes someone in the relationship to be going behind your back and bringing back whatever they have caught and passing it on to you! It isn't nice but it happens!
thats it...I'm joining the convent!!!
 | |
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StillGotIt said: 
Okay...so....you've met somebody special....they are perfect in every way....and then you learn they have genital herpes. Would it slow you down or would you go forward with this person? What about HIV positive people? Would you still date them? I don't even like to get close to dudes with a coldsore. That would definitely be a no-no for me. "I know that living with u baby, was sometimes hard...but I'm willing 2 give it another try.
Cause nothing compares....nothing compares 2 u!" | |
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Neophyte said: StillGotIt said:
Okay...so....you've met somebody special....they are perfect in every way....and then you learn they have genital herpes. Would it slow you down or would you go forward with this person? What about HIV positive people? Would you still date them? I don't even like to get close to dudes with a coldsore. That would definitely be a no-no for me. How in the world does somebody come up to you, sight unseen, and ask for your phone number with somethng like this on their lips..... 
I'm just saying.....  Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. | |
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StillGotIt said: Neophyte said: I don't even like to get close to dudes with a coldsore. That would definitely be a no-no for me. How in the world does somebody come up to you, sight unseen, and ask for your phone number with somethng like this on their lips.....
I'm just saying..... From a safe muthafuckin' distance  | |
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StillGotIt said: Neophyte said: I don't even like to get close to dudes with a coldsore. That would definitely be a no-no for me. How in the world does somebody come up to you, sight unseen, and ask for your phone number with somethng like this on their lips.....
I'm just saying..... Exactly! Now, I don't know what genital herpes actually look like, but if coldsores looks like that....I don't think I need to say nothing more.  "I know that living with u baby, was sometimes hard...but I'm willing 2 give it another try.
Cause nothing compares....nothing compares 2 u!" | |
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CarrieLee said: Google image genital herpes and get back to me...
SCNDLS said:[quote] Lammastide said: The symptoms and their seriousness vary from person to person as do the outbreaks themselves. So you have no way of knowing if you're ONLY going to have a cold sore and even if you do this time you could have more serious symptoms the next time. It's very disconcerting to me that you would say you "just don't care." But, okay. 
http://www.webmd.com/geni...n-symptoms The classic symptom of genital herpes is a cluster of small fluid-filled blisters that break, forming painful sores that crust and heal. This process can take several days. But some people get only a rash or small bumps on the skin that appear to be pimples. Still others have different symptoms, such as painful urination, and some women have fluid discharge from the vagina. Sores may appear four to seven days after a person is first infected. Flu-like symptoms, including fever and swollen lymph glands in the groin, may also follow the initial infection. Symptoms come and go with no set pattern. One person may have an outbreak once a year, while another may have one every few weeks. Before a flare-up, a person may notice an itching, tingling, or burning sensation in the affected area, and there may be sharp pains in the pelvis or down the leg. Herpes sores are usually worst the first time they appear. In later outbreaks the sores tend to be less painful and last for a shorter period of time. The symptoms of genital herpes can affect any of the following places on the body: Penis Scrotum Vulva Vagina Anus Urethra Thighs Buttocks I've seen the pics. They are unattractive and I'm guessing the outbreaks are rather uncomfortable.  At the risk of sounding glib, though, I'd guess the outbreaks we see photos of are probably among the worst of the worst -- unusually virulent, probably in a patient with a compromised immune system or poor general health, probably untreated. And I'm aware of the risk for meningitis, encephalitis, ocular outbreaks, etc.... but we just don't generally hear about this level of complication in the vast majority of the approximately 17% of adults who already have antibodies for HSV-2 or the whopping 57% who already have them for HSV-1... and probably don't even know it. (U.S. stats from http://jama.ama-assn.org/...296/8/964) To this majority, the outbreaks are simply like itchy pimples on their privates or an oral cold sore that goes away pretty quickly and may or may not come back. And subsequent breakouts are increasingly less frequent and less severe. It's just not a big deal to me personally... not that I'd go around telling folk it shouldn't be to them.
I CAN understand, though, how the matter would be of greater concern to a woman who planned on eventually having children. If that were me, I'd probably take a far more conservative approach to this all. I appreciate their concern and any risk to their potential child. Lastly, I have to say that reading my posts here, I can see how I come off as generally cavalier about stopping the spread of herpes.  I assure you I'm not trying to be. But in the hypothetical presented -- where I'd have already decided this person is otherwise perfect and that we'd be in a monogamous, committed relationship well before we start having sex (based on my own inclinations) -- the issue just wouldn't faze me much. When/if I contracted herpes, it's not like I'd be spreading it around. And if I eventually found myself with the virus, single again and in the dating market, it's just a liability I'd have assumed... even stupidly, and I'd take up the adult responsibility of informing that one possible mate who might eventually come about.[Edited 5/12/09 8:15am] Ὅσον ζῇς φαίνου
μηδὲν ὅλως σὺ λυποῦ πρὸς ὀλίγον ἐστὶ τὸ ζῆν τὸ τέλος ὁ χρόνος ἀπαιτεῖ.” | |
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Imago said: Vendetta1 said: I know someone who has it that didn't pass it but ya know what? If I'm with the one, I don't even want the thought in the back of my mind. I also hate rubbers and do not want to use them in a committed relationship.
I hate condoms too. Bliss is fucking the living shit out of somebody... I mean a good, hard, long pounding without a condom. I mean, I'm romantic that way. Ideally we ALL want to fuck without condoms. I get that. However... My partner has been blissfully fuckin the shit out of me (with condoms) for 12 years and remains neg. I got "the news" (poz, not herpes) only a few months into our relationship. I know it's a very personal choice, but I don't understand how folk will not take a chance on a protected relationship with someone they know to be positive (of whatever) but will then turn around and take the BIGGEST chance by going unprotected because it's a "committed" relationship. | |
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I hae a few people close to me who are HIV positive. One regularly used condoms and cannot understand how they got infected. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. | |
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StillGotIt said: I hae a few people close to me who are HIV positive. One regularly used condoms and cannot understand how they got infected.
So I'm guessing you're celibate? We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves. | |
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StillGotIt said: I hae a few people close to me who are HIV positive. One regularly used condoms and cannot understand how they got infected.
There are other ways than intercourse. Less risk but possible. Also, these are people close to you. You can't speak for anyone but yourself, so you'd never really know. No matter how close they are. There are things some folk would never disclose to the closest of close. [Edited 5/11/09 14:50pm] | |
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Genesia said: StillGotIt said: I hae a few people close to me who are HIV positive. One regularly used condoms and cannot understand how they got infected.
So I'm guessing you're celibate? hell no....but this thread is scaring the shit outta me Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. | |
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johnart said: StillGotIt said: I hae a few people close to me who are HIV positive. One regularly used condoms and cannot understand how they got infected.
There are other ways than intercourse. Less risk but possible. Also, these are people close to you. You can't speak for anyone but yourself, so you'd never really know. No matter how close they are. There are things some folk would never disclose to the closest of close. [Edited 5/11/09 14:50pm] yea...your right about that.... Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. | |
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StillGotIt said: Genesia said: So I'm guessing you're celibate? hell no....but this thread is scaring the shit outta me | |
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Imago said: Bliss is fucking the living shit out of somebody... not right now.... but earlier.... | |
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johnart said: Imago said: I hate condoms too. Bliss is fucking the living shit out of somebody... I mean a good, hard, long pounding without a condom. I mean, I'm romantic that way. Ideally we ALL want to fuck without condoms. I get that. However... My partner has been blissfully fuckin the shit out of me (with condoms) for 12 years and remains neg. I got "the news" (poz, not herpes) only a few months into our relationship. I know it's a very personal choice, but I don't understand how folk will not take a chance on a protected relationship with someone they know to be positive (of whatever) but will then turn around and take the BIGGEST chance by going unprotected because it's a "committed" relationship. Seriously? And he doesn't make you ring a bell and shout, "Unclean! Unclean!" as you walk down the street?  We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves. | |
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