SUPRMAN said:

TD3 said:

HA! To each his own. Throw bricks but you can deal with the inexperience also. Ain't nobody got time for that.

HA!... back to ya. When did sex become rocket science? It's not that complicated... Damn, did you come out the womb experienced, hell no!

TD3 said:

SUPRMAN said:

HA! To each his own. Throw bricks but you can deal with the inexperience also. Ain't nobody got time for that.

HA!... back to ya. When did sex become rocket science? It's not that complicated... Damn, did you come out the womb experienced, hell no!

No, but that doesn't mean I have to still keep teaching.

People are that complicated, it we could keep it to just sex . . . . .lol

xpertluva said:

Stymie said:

xpertluva said: So you were just in it to sleep with her? Nothing to show for it?

No, I wanted forever.

I'm so sorry things didn't work out as you inteded.

But, dude, if you honestly found love with this woman -- even if only for five years -- your time wasn't wasted. And you have no reason to have felt like a fool.

SUPRMAN said:

Stymie said:

Yeah cuz women are lying whores.

No, but they all aren't sugar and spice either are they?

Let's not pretend women don't lie to themselves and to their partners in relationships. Men do to.

Seems to be a mammal thing.

Can you keep it to what we do know and not enter facts not in evidence? Can we pretend we are talking about the women who don't lie?

SUPRMAN said:

Stymie said:

If sex is the most important thing to you, good fucking riddance.

No it's not, but fixing 'bad' sex?

I'm not in a relationship to change somebody. If we aren't going to be sexually compatible, let's find better matches to marry.

We are not going to marry and now you don't do this, can't do like, only did that because I like it and all that other BS.

oh well. Sexual incompatibility is not a dealbreaker for me. I have no idea what some of you expect someone coming into a sexual relationship with no experience to know.

Stymie said:

SUPRMAN said:

No, but they all aren't sugar and spice either are they?

Let's not pretend women don't lie to themselves and to their partners in relationships. Men do to.

Seems to be a mammal thing.

Can you keep it to what we do know and not enter facts not in evidence? Can we pretend we are talking about the women who don't lie?

We do know all women are not lying whores. We do know all women don't lie.

How does one find them outside of church though?

Lammastide said:

xpertluva said:

No, I wanted forever.

I'm so sorry things didn't work out as you inteded.

But, dude, if you honestly found love with this woman -- even if only for five years -- your time wasn't wasted. And you have no reason to have felt like a fool.

Co-sign. Well stated.

Stymie said:

SUPRMAN said:

No it's not, but fixing 'bad' sex?

I'm not in a relationship to change somebody. If we aren't going to be sexually compatible, let's find better matches to marry.

We are not going to marry and now you don't do this, can't do like, only did that because I like it and all that other BS.

oh well. Sexual incompatibility is not a dealbreaker for me. I have no idea what some of you expect someone coming into a sexual relationship with no experience to know.

Absolutely nothing. That's the problem.

Why is someone in 2013 saving themselves for marriage? You arent a gift for another to have.

lazycrockett said:

Why is someone in 2013 saving themselves for marriage? You arent a gift for another to have.

Perhaps not for you. But it strikes me that truth would be up to the person waiting for them.

I'm going to guess it's pretty rare these days, but then, so is finding the right partner, regardless of that.

SUPRMAN said:

TD3 said:

HA!... back to ya. When did sex become rocket science? It's not that complicated... Damn, did you come out the womb experienced, hell no!

No, but that doesn't mean I have to still keep teaching.

People are that complicated, it we could keep it to just sex . . . . .lol

Wow, foolish me and I thought making love / sex was about reciprocity? Even if ones partner is inexperienced doesn't the other person learn and share somethings as well? From the question posed its obvious this relationship has the potential of being serious and has substance that goes beyond just fucking... we ain't talkin' about a wham bam thank-you mam deal here.

And yes....


Human beings are complicated but your what love got to do with it.... hints of someone who scared off by any-type emotional involvement good or bad. Can you enjoy sex without any emotional / commitment, hell yes... speaking for myself. But some people can't or don't won't to and I can respect that. Sex is a lot of fun, making love even more so. (IMHO)

----------------------------------------------------------

[Edited 7/6/13 16:23pm]

robertlove said:

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

Speaking as someone who's also saving herself for marriage....

Most guys I've come across with have no patience to wait around for marriage. But there is always exception.

I am currently in a relationship with a guy that's experienced...and I told him from the very start that I don't fool around before marriage. Also told him that if that's a problem, he can run along. Guess what, he stuck around...and even though there are times that we want that aspect of a relationship, our relationship is more wholesome...and we connect on many different levels. We learn new things about each other that I'm sure, if or when the time comes, making love will be worth the wait. Sex can sometimes get in the way of learning about another person.

The man you're with has to want to be the first and last (as you are for him). If he is, then it's totally possible.

Good luck!

Just out of curiousity, what are you waiting for to get married than? Is there a minimum time to be with somebody?

We're still tryna get our lives together first before we discuss taking the next big step.

TD3 said:

SUPRMAN said:

No, but that doesn't mean I have to still keep teaching.

People are that complicated, it we could keep it to just sex . . . . .lol

Wow, foolish me and I thought making love / sex was about reciprocity? Even if one's partner is inexperienced doesn't the other person learn and share somethings as well? From the question posed its obvious this relationship has the potnial of being serious and has substance that goes beyond just fucking... we ain't talkin' about a wham bam thank-you mam deal here.

And yes....


Human beings are complicated but your what love got to do with it.... hints of someone who scared off by anytype emotional involvement good or bad. Can you enjoy sex without any emotional / commitment, hell yes... speaking for myself. But some people can't or don't won't to and I can respect that. Sex is a lot of fun, making love even more so. (IMHO)

Even with 2 "experienced" people, they haven't experienced each other. Everyone's different in what they like there's still plenty to learn and teach.

CarrieMpls said:

TD3 said:

Wow, foolish me and I thought making love / sex was about reciprocity? Even if ones partner is inexperienced doesn't the other person learn and share somethings as well? From the question posed its obvious this relationship has the potential of being serious and has substance that goes beyond just fucking... we ain't talkin' about a wham bam thank-you mam deal here.

And yes....


Human beings are complicated but your what love got to do with it.... hints of someone who scared off by any-type emotional involvement good or bad. Can you enjoy sex without any emotional / commitment, hell yes... speaking for myself. But some people can't or don't won't to and I can respect that. Sex is a lot of fun, making love even more so. (IMHO)

Even with 2 "experienced" people, they haven't experienced each other. Everyone's different in what they like there's still plenty to learn and teach.

Exactly, well said Carrie.

TD3 said:

SUPRMAN said:

No, but that doesn't mean I have to still keep teaching.

People are that complicated, it we could keep it to just sex . . . . .lol

Wow, foolish me and I thought making love / sex was about reciprocity? Even if ones partner is inexperienced doesn't the other person learn and share somethings as well? From the question posed its obvious this relationship has the potential of being serious and has substance that goes beyond just fucking... we ain't talkin' about a wham bam thank-you mam deal here.

And yes....


Human beings are complicated but your what love got to do with it.... hints of someone who scared off by any-type emotional involvement good or bad. Can you enjoy sex without any emotional / commitment, hell yes... speaking for myself. But some people can't or don't won't to and I can respect that. Sex is a lot of fun, making love even more so. (IMHO)

----------------------------------------------------------

[Edited 7/6/13 16:23pm]

That's so true.

My longest relationship was 14 years. We were best friends for over 25.

Not wanting to teach someone sexually is not about emotional involvement.

I understand we aren't talking wham bam thank you ma'am. I am not interested in someone inexperienced. Been there, done that.

lazycrockett said:

Why is someone in 2013 saving themselves for marriage? You arent a gift for another to have.

Sure you are! You are the ULTIMATE gift!

No a person isn't a gift for someone else to open and own. The gift is to own your own sexuality and be empowered by it, not to hold your innocence and vitrue as a reward to a patient partner.

Lammastide said:

xpertluva said:

No, I wanted forever.

I'm so sorry things didn't work out as you inteded.

But, dude, if you honestly found love with this woman -- even if only for five years -- your time wasn't wasted. And you have no reason to have felt like a fool.

Thanks so much. Yeah, that's one way to look at it and I tried to comfort myself by thinking of it as such for a long time. I suppose I just wanted the chance to experience with her how amazing it is to make love while truly being in love. If I couldn't have forever, it still would've been nice (as Luther Vandross would say), if only for one niiiight.

xpertluva said:

Lammastide said:

I'm so sorry things didn't work out as you inteded.

But, dude, if you honestly found love with this woman -- even if only for five years -- your time wasn't wasted. And you have no reason to have felt like a fool.

Thanks so much. Yeah, that's one way to look at it and I tried to comfort myself by thinking of it as such for a long time. I suppose I just wanted the chance to experience with her how amazing it is to make love while truly being in love. If I couldn't have forever, it still would've been nice (as Luther Vandross would say), if only for one niiiight.

I'm curious: Have you found anyone since her for whom you've felt similarly?

I love this idea, and I know a lot of men who truly would appreciate it.
but age - a major factor. if a girl gets married in 18-20, that is one thing. I and most of my friends did not have sexual relations before the age of 18, but most of the girls now want to get married after 25-26. I do not know how much normally remain a virgin until that age.

JustErin said:

Men love the idea of being the first.

Women only want to talk about shoes.

tinaz said:Im with LadyC here.. What is the point of making out and getting yourselves all worked up if you know you wont be going any further.. Thats called a tease...

....and a severe case of blue balls.

tinaz said:

Im with LadyC here.. What is the point of making out and getting yourselves all worked up if you know you wont be going any further.. Thats called a tease...

Are you for real? You think every time a teenager makes out they're being a tease if they don't put out? You shouldn't bother kissing someone if you don't want to go all the way?

I love making out just for the sake of making out still at age 38. Of course it doesn't happen as often as when I was younger or when I first started dating my man, but it's still fun now and again.

CarrieMpls said:

tinaz said:

Im with LadyC here.. What is the point of making out and getting yourselves all worked up if you know you wont be going any further.. Thats called a tease...

Are you for real? You think every time a teenager makes out they're being a tease if they don't put out? You shouldn't bother kissing someone if you don't want to go all the way?

I love making out just for the sake of making out still at age 38. Of course it doesn't happen as often as when I was younger or when I first started dating my man, but it's still fun now and again.

Are you for real?

Do your partners know you are just making out for the sake of making out?

I hope so.

Kissing is fine, with no tongue. If we are kissing and touching, that's ok for 5 minutes but either we are leading to something or just stop now.

Getting back to the basics of the question: Doesn't "saving yourself" really only apply to intercourse? I thought that other kinds of acts were ok in this kind of "not before marriage" scenario

Lammastide said:

xpertluva said:

Thanks so much. Yeah, that's one way to look at it and I tried to comfort myself by thinking of it as such for a long time. I suppose I just wanted the chance to experience with her how amazing it is to make love while truly being in love. If I couldn't have forever, it still would've been nice (as Luther Vandross would say), if only for one niiiight.

I'm curious: Have you found anyone since her for whom you've felt similarly?

Unfortunately, I haven't felt quite the same way about anyone else.

NDRU said:

Getting back to the basics of the question: Doesn't "saving yourself" really only apply to intercourse? I thought that other kinds of acts were ok in this kind of "not before marriage" scenario

I figure that's up to the individual. However, I feel that if you're going to cross certain lines, you may as well go all the way.