JustErin said:

BlackAdder7 said:

why do you want to be hanging around someone who is treating you so poorly?

It's the old trap women always fall into...I just want to know what the fuck his deal is with me - because obviously there is some kind of issue. Honestly it's bugging me. I know I'll probably never know and I know that it really shouldn't matter and that I'll just need to move the fuck on.

Could that be your answer?

A His behavior stems from liking you, however being intimidated by you. So, he wants to be all tough guy and acts as if doesn't care about you. He'll be like that in a relationship. Every day drama.

B He got scared, didn't want to get involved with you. Because he was proud he could have you, and wanted to make sure he did not loose face, he tells everybody it was him who stood you up. He'll be like that in a relationship, it's all about his ego. Drama every day.

C He just wasn't into you. Wanted to have sex. Now he feels awkard about the situation and therefore acts a little off. This too shall pass.

D There is something really wrong with you. You are not good at sex. You are not attractive at all. You have the most ugly taste for dressing in the world. Your breath smells. Yoy'r boring company.

E You have an independent mind and are financially independent. Because you don't need him for your living, the only reason for you to be involved with him is because of his personallity, looks and all the love he gives you. That scares him. He is insecure about being good enhough for an independent woman. He understands a woman who wants to be with him for extra money. He doesn't understand why a woman would want him when she doesn't need him. Hence, there is nothing wrong with you. And he's just like most men. That's the problem. They'r still adjusting to the whole feminism thing. And they don't do that very well.

So, what do you think is most likely the answer?

dJJ said:

JustErin said:

It's the old trap women always fall into...I just want to know what the fuck his deal is with me - because obviously there is some kind of issue. Honestly it's bugging me. I know I'll probably never know and I know that it really shouldn't matter and that I'll just need to move the fuck on.

Could that be your answer?

A His behavior stems from liking you, however being intimidated by you. So, he wants to be all tough guy and acts as if doesn't care about you. He'll be like that in a relationship. Every day drama.

B He got scared, didn't want to get involved with you. Because he was proud he could have you, and wanted to make sure he did not loose face, he tells everybody it was him who stood you up. He'll be like that in a relationship, it's all about his ego. Drama every day.

C He just wasn't into you. Wanted to have sex. Now he feels awkard about the situation and therefore acts a little off. This too shall pass.

D There is something really wrong with you. You are not good at sex. You are not attractive at all. You have the most ugly taste for dressing in the world. Your breath smells. Yoy'r boring company.

E You have an independent mind and are financially independent. Because you don't need him for your living, the only reason for you to be involved with him is because of his personallity, looks and all the love he gives you. That scares him. He is insecure about being good enhough for an independent woman. He understands a woman who wants to be with him for extra money. He doesn't understand why a woman would want him when she doesn't need him. Hence, there is nothing wrong with you. And he's just like most men. That's the problem. They'r still adjusting to the whole feminism thing. And they don't do that very well.

So, what do you think is most likely the answer?

To be honest Erin, you always seemed to have the upper hand in your relationships...at least that's what I've interpreted when you've posted about dating and relationships...if not the upper hand, then it's neutral. This guy got into your head, which is so unusual...

[Edited 4/10/11 14:26pm]

which splunge?

This guys sounds like a douche. Simply put, you are too good for him

[Edited 4/10/11 14:53pm]

JustErin said:

BlackAdder7 said:

why do you want to be hanging around someone who is treating you so poorly?

It's the old trap women always fall into...I just want to know what the fuck his deal is with me - because obviously there is some kind of issue. Honestly it's bugging me. I know I'll probably never know and I know that it really shouldn't matter and that I'll just need to move the fuck on.

Women don't "always fall into" it. That is a choice.

dJJ said:

JustErin said:

It's the old trap women always fall into...I just want to know what the fuck his deal is with me - because obviously there is some kind of issue. Honestly it's bugging me. I know I'll probably never know and I know that it really shouldn't matter and that I'll just need to move the fuck on.

Could that be your answer?

A His behavior stems from liking you, however being intimidated by you. So, he wants to be all tough guy and acts as if doesn't care about you. He'll be like that in a relationship. Every day drama.

B He got scared, didn't want to get involved with you. Because he was proud he could have you, and wanted to make sure he did not loose face, he tells everybody it was him who stood you up. He'll be like that in a relationship, it's all about his ego. Drama every day.

C He just wasn't into you. Wanted to have sex. Now he feels awkard about the situation and therefore acts a little off. This too shall pass.

D There is something really wrong with you. You are not good at sex. You are not attractive at all. You have the most ugly taste for dressing in the world. Your breath smells. Yoy'r boring company.

E You have an independent mind and are financially independent. Because you don't need him for your living, the only reason for you to be involved with him is because of his personallity, looks and all the love he gives you. That scares him. He is insecure about being good enhough for an independent woman. He understands a woman who wants to be with him for extra money. He doesn't understand why a woman would want him when she doesn't need him. Hence, there is nothing wrong with you. And he's just like most men. That's the problem. They'r still adjusting to the whole feminism thing. And they don't do that very well.

So, what do you think is most likely the answer?

My guess is D - except I never slept with him.

Genesia said:

JustErin said:

It's the old trap women always fall into...I just want to know what the fuck his deal is with me - because obviously there is some kind of issue. Honestly it's bugging me. I know I'll probably never know and I know that it really shouldn't matter and that I'll just need to move the fuck on.

Women don't "always fall into" it. That is a choice.

Good lord, I know that it's a choice. I didn't mean that literally.

BlackAdder7 said:

dJJ said:

Could that be your answer?

A His behavior stems from liking you, however being intimidated by you. So, he wants to be all tough guy and acts as if doesn't care about you. He'll be like that in a relationship. Every day drama.

B He got scared, didn't want to get involved with you. Because he was proud he could have you, and wanted to make sure he did not loose face, he tells everybody it was him who stood you up. He'll be like that in a relationship, it's all about his ego. Drama every day.

C He just wasn't into you. Wanted to have sex. Now he feels awkard about the situation and therefore acts a little off. This too shall pass.

D There is something really wrong with you. You are not good at sex. You are not attractive at all. You have the most ugly taste for dressing in the world. Your breath smells. Yoy'r boring company.

E You have an independent mind and are financially independent. Because you don't need him for your living, the only reason for you to be involved with him is because of his personallity, looks and all the love he gives you. That scares him. He is insecure about being good enhough for an independent woman. He understands a woman who wants to be with him for extra money. He doesn't understand why a woman would want him when she doesn't need him. Hence, there is nothing wrong with you. And he's just like most men. That's the problem. They'r still adjusting to the whole feminism thing. And they don't do that very well.

So, what do you think is most likely the answer?

To be honest Erin, you always seemed to have the upper hand in your relationships...at least that's what I've interpreted when you've posted about dating and relationships...if not the upper hand, then it's neutral. This guy got into your head, which is so unusual...

[Edited 4/10/11 14:26pm]

No, I don't. In some sure but not always. He's not the first dude to get in my head...there was one back home too....but I finally completely cut it off 100%.

Do you think this guy just wants you to kiss his ass a bit because that's what he's used to?

He's hot right?

Good looking dudes are used to women chasing them... unless he's just used to possessive women.

He may have been turned off by you not being all clingy with him in public.

Do you think this guy just wants you to kiss his ass a bit because that's what he's used to? He's not even giving me the chance to. He totally ignores me. He says he is up for going out but then doesn't call me back.

He's hot right? Yeah, he's pretty attractive to me.

If he just ignored me and never complained about me to others, I'd just think he thought I was gross or something...but since he seems to have some kind of issue with me, I'm a little confused.

Shitty deal though...definitely makes me feel even more insecure.

JustErin said:

dJJ said:

Could that be your answer?

A His behavior stems from liking you, however being intimidated by you. So, he wants to be all tough guy and acts as if doesn't care about you. He'll be like that in a relationship. Every day drama.

B He got scared, didn't want to get involved with you. Because he was proud he could have you, and wanted to make sure he did not loose face, he tells everybody it was him who stood you up. He'll be like that in a relationship, it's all about his ego. Drama every day.

C He just wasn't into you. Wanted to have sex. Now he feels awkard about the situation and therefore acts a little off. This too shall pass.

D There is something really wrong with you. You are not good at sex. You are not attractive at all. You have the most ugly taste for dressing in the world. Your breath smells. Yoy'r boring company.

E You have an independent mind and are financially independent. Because you don't need him for your living, the only reason for you to be involved with him is because of his personallity, looks and all the love he gives you. That scares him. He is insecure about being good enhough for an independent woman. He understands a woman who wants to be with him for extra money. He doesn't understand why a woman would want him when she doesn't need him. Hence, there is nothing wrong with you. And he's just like most men. That's the problem. They'r still adjusting to the whole feminism thing. And they don't do that very well.

So, what do you think is most likely the answer?

My guess is D - except I never slept with him.

Allright, test it then.

-So, it can't be your failing sex skills because there was no sex.

-It can't be that you are not attractive, because other men have been attracted to you. If you are ugly that would not happen that often.

-It could be your bad taste of dressing up. What have you been wearing?

-Test your breath. Does it smell?

-You seem to have friends. And at the org you like a stir. That goes against you being a bore. However, this migth be true. Do other people generally refer to you as boring? Are you boring to hang out with?

JustErin said:

Do you think this guy just wants you to kiss his ass a bit because that's what he's used to? He's not even giving me the chance to. He totally ignores me. He says he is up for going out but then doesn't call me back.

He's hot right? Yeah, he's pretty attractive to me.

If he just ignored me and never complained about me to others, I'd just think he thought I was gross or something...but since he seems to have some kind of issue with me, I'm a little confused.

I guess I'm just going to look at is as he's 100% not interested in even being a friend to me even though we will be around each other a fair amount. Not much I can do about that but just let it go.

Shitty deal though...definitely makes me feel even more insecure.

Oh! Then that's just it... he wants you to chase him, call him 20 times a day.. run to him when he enters a room, fawn over him and hang on his every word.

Um, yeah.... maybe you are NOT his type of women, you got too much self-esteem for his tastes.

Do you think you have the patience to teach him that the universe does not revolve around him?

I think you are better off walking away.

dJJ said:

JustErin said:

My guess is D - except I never slept with him.

Allright, test it then.

-So, it can't be your failing sex skills because there was no sex.

-It can't be that you are not attractive, because other men have been attracted to you. If you are ugly that would not happen that often.

-It could be your bad taste of dressing up. What have you been wearing?

-Test your breath. Does it smell?

-You seem to have friends. And at the org you like a stir. That goes against you being a bore. However, this migth be true. Do other people generally refer to you as boring? Are you boring to hang out with?

Well, it's not my sense of style and I asked my son if my breath smells and he said "no".

JustErin said:

dJJ said:

Allright, test it then.

-So, it can't be your failing sex skills because there was no sex.

-It can't be that you are not attractive, because other men have been attracted to you. If you are ugly that would not happen that often.

-It could be your bad taste of dressing up. What have you been wearing?

-Test your breath. Does it smell?

-You seem to have friends. And at the org you like a stir. That goes against you being a bore. However, this migth be true. Do other people generally refer to you as boring? Are you boring to hang out with?

Well, it's not my sense of style and I asked my son if my breath smells and he said "no".

let it gooooooooooooo Erin please, you're so much more better than to waste more time on this guy. you're doing exactly what he wants you toooooooooo. oh god, you're making me whine.

Well then, is he acting like that because you are boring company?

Is there proof for that assumption?

Do other people leave the pub when you enter? Or did you ever notice that when you talk to people they have to visit the toilet within a few minutes? Do their eyes roam the room when you talk?

paintedlady said:

JustErin said:

Do you think this guy just wants you to kiss his ass a bit because that's what he's used to? He's not even giving me the chance to. He totally ignores me. He says he is up for going out but then doesn't call me back.

He's hot right? Yeah, he's pretty attractive to me.

If he just ignored me and never complained about me to others, I'd just think he thought I was gross or something...but since he seems to have some kind of issue with me, I'm a little confused.

I guess I'm just going to look at is as he's 100% not interested in even being a friend to me even though we will be around each other a fair amount. Not much I can do about that but just let it go.

Shitty deal though...definitely makes me feel even more insecure.

Oh! Then that's just it... he wants you to chase him, call him 20 times a day.. run to him when he enters a room, fawn over him and hang on his every word.

Um, yeah.... maybe you are NOT his type of women, you got too much self-esteem for his tastes.

Do you think you have the patience to teach him that the universe does not revolve around him?

I think you are better off walking away.

I have patience but I do not want to be "friends" with someone that obviously has zero respect for me.

If he comes up and talks to me, tells me what's up on his own accord, that fine we can go from there...if not, I'm just letting it go.

I hope he does come clean, but I'll try not to obsess about it.

dJJ said:

Well then, is he acting like that because you are boring company?

Is there proof for that assumption?

Do other people leave the pub when you enter? Or did you ever notice that when you talk to people they have to visit the toilet within a few minutes? Do their eyes roam the room when you talk?

dJJ said:

Well then, is he acting like that because you are boring company?

Is there proof for that assumption?

Do other people leave the pub when you enter? Or did you ever notice that when you talk to people they have to visit the toilet within a few minutes? Do their eyes roam the room when you talk?

I don't know if he thinks I am boring because he's not even giving me the chance to bore him.

The only valid conclusion now, is that answer to your question was not D.

A His behavior stems from liking you, however being intimidated by you. So, he wants to be all tough guy and acts as if doesn't care about you. He'll be like that in a relationship. Every day drama.

B He got scared, didn't want to get involved with you. Because he was proud he could have you, and wanted to make sure he did not loose face, he tells everybody it was him who stood you up. He'll be like that in a relationship, it's all about his ego. Drama every day.

C He just wasn't into you. Wanted to have sex. Now he feels awkard about the situation and therefore acts a little off. This too shall pass.

D There is something really wrong with you. You are not good at sex. You are not attractive at all. You have the most ugly taste for dressing in the world. Your breath smells. Yoy'r boring company.

E You have an independent mind and are financially independent. Because you don't need him for your living, the only reason for you to be involved with him is because of his personallity, looks and all the love he gives you. That scares him. He is insecure about being good enhough for an independent woman. He understands a woman who wants to be with him for extra money. He doesn't understand why a woman would want him when she doesn't need him. Hence, there is nothing wrong with you. And he's just like most men. That's the problem. They'r still adjusting to the whole feminism thing. And they don't do that very well.

What answer is the most likely, now it is established that D was the false answer?

I'm just gonna make it simple and go with:

F - he thinks I am too fat now

Yeah, you are right. That's very plausible.

I forgot to include that one. And obviously, female fat is the main reason for all these problems between lovers.

How fat were you when you knew eachother from before and how fat are you now? And what's your size? (in kilo's and meters please, I'm not good at the whole American metrics)

Do other people confirmed you'r fat? Do waitresses give you a certain look when you order food? Do you know all people of McDonalds by name? Do people spontaniously offer you a second seat when you try to sit down? Do you need help when getting up from your chair?

dJJ said:

Yeah, you are right. That's very plausible.

I forgot to include that one. And obviously, female fat is the main reason for all these problems between lovers.

How fat were you when you knew eachother from before and how fat are you now? And what's your size? (in kilo's and meters please, I'm not good at the whole American metrics)

Do other people confirmed you'r fat? Do waitresses give you a certain look when you order food? Do you know all people of McDonalds by name? Do people spontaniously offer you a second seat when you try to sit down? Do you need help when getting up from your chair?

deej...i know you're only about 10000 miles away from her...ask her out already. she likes men who say "aboot"

dJJ said:

Yeah, you are right. That's very plausible.

I forgot to include that one. And obviously, female fat is the main reason for all these problems between lovers.

How fat were you when you knew eachother from before and how fat are you now? And what's your size? (in kilo's and meters please, I'm not good at the whole American metrics)

Do other people confirmed you'r fat? Do waitresses give you a certain look when you order food? Do you know all people of McDonalds by name? Do people spontaniously offer you a second seat when you try to sit down? Do you need help when getting up from your chair?

It's definitely F.

I'm happy that is sorted out then.

We finally know what his problem is. He didn't keep up with you'r developing body. Well, you know how some men are a little bit slow.....Give him some time. Teach him a few things about good food and taste. Maybe he'll change his mind about you and will eat you properly. And develop a little bit himself too.

Maybe you can trick him in some therapy for men who are afraid of female bodies?

No, it's ok. I've been going to the gym 5 times a week for a month now. I'm getting rid of the blub slowly but surely.

Maybe then he'll love me in the way I wish to be loved (hard and fast in some seedy back alley).

Really?

Well, before you spend too much of your precious time that you have, into developing some lame disorder that stems from a distorted self image (and very badly fabricated mirrors)

just look for proof first.

Did you check all the seedy back alleys and found him giving hard love to a girl with anorexia/ 12 yera old/ no breasts no behind?

Please, do check your facts first. Because, otherwise you might think you don't have a gorgeous body, while in the meanwhile you actually have a body that is perfectly shaped for hard penetration. And that was not his problem at all (your body I mean, maybe he has a problem with hard penetration).

Now that I think of it, I forgot that option

G. He has trouble penetratin hard. He's afraid you find that out and will not want him anymore. To avoid that blamage, he's acting like a regular; a little bit stupid, slightly autistic.

dJJ said:

Really?

Well, before you spend too much of your precious time that you have, into developing some lame disorder that stems from a distorted self image (and very badly fabricated mirrors)

just look for proof first.

Did you check all the seedy back alleys and found him giving hard love to a girl with anorexia/ 12 yera old/ no breasts no behind?

Please, do check your facts first. Because, otherwise you might think you don't have a gorgeous body, while in the meanwhile you actually have a body that is perfectly shaped for hard penetration. And that was not his problem at all (your body I mean, maybe he has a problem with hard penetration).

Now that I think of it, I forgot that option

G. He has trouble penetratin hard. He's afraid you find that out and will not want him anymore. To avoid that blamage, he's acting like a regular; a little bit stupid, slightly autistic.

I just saw pictures of who he was dating recently. She's no 12 year old body chick that's for damn sure. She's just an average looking girl. I was a little surprised....but then again I always picture gfs of every guy I know as gorgeous and am always surprised when they are not.

JustErin said:

dJJ said:

Really?

Well, before you spend too much of your precious time that you have, into developing some lame disorder that stems from a distorted self image (and very badly fabricated mirrors)

just look for proof first.

Did you check all the seedy back alleys and found him giving hard love to a girl with anorexia/ 12 yera old/ no breasts no behind?

Please, do check your facts first. Because, otherwise you might think you don't have a gorgeous body, while in the meanwhile you actually have a body that is perfectly shaped for hard penetration. And that was not his problem at all (your body I mean, maybe he has a problem with hard penetration).

Now that I think of it, I forgot that option

G. He has trouble penetratin hard. He's afraid you find that out and will not want him anymore. To avoid that blamage, he's acting like a regular; a little bit stupid, slightly autistic.

I just saw pictures of who he was dating recently. She's no 12 year old body chick that's for damn sure. She's just an average looking girl. I was a little surprised....but then again I always picture gfs of every guy I know as gorgeous and am always surprised when they are not.

Why do you assume that every girlfriend of the guys you know are drop dead gorgeous? The reality is that most people tend to date someone within their league looks wise, so unless your male friends are super hot, chances are they are probably dating someone average looking, if they are dating anyone at all.

If guys are always going around telling you how sexy you are, you should at least be hooking up with someone studly, assuming that the guy isn't some asshole, but then again people tend to attract other people they are feeling comfortable with at that particular moment. But since you say that you are insecure at times, you may attracting a bunch of losers with issues. If you just focus on loving and appreciating yourself for who you are and knowing that you are fabulous and worthy of the best people around, you will find that special guy who loves you for you, will hopefully be well endowed, and take you in a back alley for some seedy, dirty sex.

JustErin said:

Genesia said:

Women don't "always fall into" it. That is a choice.

Good lord, I know that it's a choice. I didn't mean that literally.

Sorry. Didn't realize I'd stumbled into Romy and Michele's High School Reunion.

JustErin said:

I have a hard time understanding some (like I'm the only one).

I like boy. Boy tells me he always liked me. Boy sees me and says he's a little taken back that I'm not all huggy and shit with him. I ask boy to do something, boy says he's outta town for a month or so but we'll go out when he's back. Boy and I talk once online. Goes fine but after that, seems totally uninterested in talking again. Boy comes back in town and we see each other out. Boy isn't friendly with me at all so I just back off - I mean, wouldn't you? Next thing I know I'm being told to "get my head out of my ass" when I try to talk to him. I'm confused and also drunk so I think maybe I did do something wrong. Boy then goes out of his way to tell people close to me that he told me off. I call boy this week to get together for coffee to try and straighten things out. He's says he will call me, and of course, he doesn't. I see boy tonight and again, I am totally ignored, can't even make eye contact and of course says nothing about us getting together. Everyone notices. And once again before I got there, he went on about how I wasn't all friendly with him last week to people close to me.

So, boy hates my guts or WHAT???

Yes, I'm drunk right now.

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