dJJ said:

missfee said:

I honestly think most men don't know what they want in a woman. If a woman just sits there quietly and doesn't give her opinion over every little thing, then she's labeled passive agressive. But if she speaks her mind and you know her position on things at that exact moment and don't have to read her mind, then she's nagging.

At the same time, I think women make the mistake of trying to figure out what they are doing wrong as far as not catching the "right men". But let's think about this, do men ever sit around thinking about what they are doing wrong that they aren't catching the "right women"? I don't think they do.

Are you seriously asking if we think men generally are reflecting on their own behavior when it comes to being with women?

What I'm saying is that men generally don't reflect on themselves as far as why they repeatedly have failed relationships or keep meeting whatever their definition is of the "wrong woman" while many women DO sit around wondering whatever it is that they are doing wrong that keeps attracting the "wrong men" to them.

JustErin said:

JerseyKRS said:

what the hell does "real women" mean?

I know I would prefer to gargle with glass than be with a needy and desperate woman.

I also think that the mass that think they are "real" are all fucked up in their own ways.

Let's be honest here, when people use the term "real" they simply mean themselves.

EX

AC

T

LY

.

SeventeenDayze said:

lyecry said:

Yeah, I agree. Men like that are not used to dealing with women like you (ie: self respecting, not desprate, your life isn't defined if you have a man or not type). He lets you know about those women because he knows that you can take him or leave him. So he's putting out the image of how bad he is desired. But men like that want they can't have. And you'e the type of woman that can see through his BS and in your strong state you wouldn't even give him the time of day because he would be wasting YOUR time. Your instincts when you meet this type of guy tells you to keep it moving. And he sees that. So he probably sees you as a challenge. He probably even wants to see how long it takes to "get in the independent/ strong girl's pants". He may seem like a nice guy because of shared interests. But his insecurities lie in the type of chicks he keeps around him and chicks from past relationships.

[Edited 11/23/11 13:00pm]

Yeah I think you're right. Sometimes, I really get tired of being the good girl but what's the alternative, right? I also figured if I acted like I liked him but didn't really go out of my way too often that he would probably pay more attention, which appears to be the case. I don't know if he's interested in me in that way at this point but I am going to have to try harder to just tune out these feelings and move on to something else. I think sometimes this is why I'm a bit of a workaholic (besides the fact that I'm dead broke, LOL)

I get tired of being a good girl but I cannot change my stripes at this point in the game. Just seems like the bad girls always get the guy at the end...oh well, perhaps I could be a nun

No, the "bad girls" just get the guy to fuck them in the end Truly, the bad girls don't really GET the guy until they start being good (at least a little).

[Edited 11/27/11 19:27pm]

PurpleRighteous1 said:

SeventeenDayze said:

Yeah I think you're right. Sometimes, I really get tired of being the good girl but what's the alternative, right? I also figured if I acted like I liked him but didn't really go out of my way too often that he would probably pay more attention, which appears to be the case. I don't know if he's interested in me in that way at this point but I am going to have to try harder to just tune out these feelings and move on to something else. I think sometimes this is why I'm a bit of a workaholic (besides the fact that I'm dead broke, LOL)

I get tired of being a good girl but I cannot change my stripes at this point in the game. Just seems like the bad girls always get the guy at the end...oh well, perhaps I could be a nun

No, the "bad girls" just get the guy to fuck them in the end Truly, the bad girls don't really GET the guy until they start being good (at least a little).

[Edited 11/27/11 19:27pm]

By a total accident, I was out and about with another friend who happens to be a guy and then ran into this papi chulo who seemed to really go out of his way to show affection towards one of the broads whom he previously never showed any PDAs towards....wow poetic justice!

IDontBelieveYouHeardMe said:

Surely the whole concept of a "real" woman as set out by OP is misconceived? When the term "real man" is used, it usually means a strong, red-blooded, sexually capable, provider and protector. In other words a man who conforms to the historical stereotype of his gender. Given that the historical stereotype of a woman is that she should be submissive, dependent, sexually demure, gentle and, generally, somewhat "weak", then applying the same logic, surely those are the attributes of a "real" woman. Before all the wimmin jump down my neck, I want to explain that I am in no way advocating those qualities as being admirable. I actually like independent and capable women. I'm merely making those observations as a matter of logic.

What's a real NFL player compared to a wannabe NFL player? What's a real Versace bag compared to a knockoff? It's kinda like that....

In truth sometimes I am needy and desperate. I am human and have all feelings.

My challenge comes in knowing when I feel needy and desperate and staying away from the phone and maybe the internet when I am in that space.

I read one of those stupid articles that are titled "what turns men off". One of the things that stuck in my mind is that men do not like women who put down other women. So, just the act of calling other women needy and/or desperate is, in itself, unattractive.

I genuinely feel that there is someone out there for me. I have come to also accept that I am not Cindy Crawford who appeals to millions of men. I am not the average Joe's cup of Tea. I am odd. I just need one taker who I also find attractive. Just one will do.

SeventeenDayze said:

IDontBelieveYouHeardMe said:

Surely the whole concept of a "real" woman as set out by OP is misconceived? When the term "real man" is used, it usually means a strong, red-blooded, sexually capable, provider and protector. In other words a man who conforms to the historical stereotype of his gender. Given that the historical stereotype of a woman is that she should be submissive, dependent, sexually demure, gentle and, generally, somewhat "weak", then applying the same logic, surely those are the attributes of a "real" woman. Before all the wimmin jump down my neck, I want to explain that I am in no way advocating those qualities as being admirable. I actually like independent and capable women. I'm merely making those observations as a matter of logic.

What's a real NFL player compared to a wannabe NFL player? What's a real Versace bag compared to a knockoff? It's kinda like that....

Lots of money.

So a real woman has lots of money?

SeventeenDayze said:

PurpleRighteous1 said:

No, the "bad girls" just get the guy to fuck them in the end Truly, the bad girls don't really GET the guy until they start being good (at least a little).

[Edited 11/27/11 19:27pm]

By a total accident, I was out and about with another friend who happens to be a guy and then ran into this papi chulo who seemed to really go out of his way to show affection towards one of the broads whom he previously never showed any PDAs towards....wow poetic justice!

Wow, this guy is sad. His power thrives off the attention he gets from women. Now that you know his weakness you can really start having fun when you act like he totally just doesn't exist and go about your life. Watch him really start falling apart and pulling all kinds of tactics to get your attention.

[Edited 11/28/11 13:07pm]

SeventeenDayze said:

By a total accident, I was out and about with another friend who happens to be a guy and then ran into this papi chulo who seemed to really go out of his way to show affection towards one of the broads whom he previously never showed any PDAs towards....wow poetic justice!

Well right there is your problem.

Fuggetabout the dumb 'papi chulo' and find yourself a nice 'papi geeko'.

PurpleJedi said:

SeventeenDayze said:

By a total accident, I was out and about with another friend who happens to be a guy and then ran into this papi chulo who seemed to really go out of his way to show affection towards one of the broads whom he previously never showed any PDAs towards....wow poetic justice!

Well right there is your problem.

Fuggetabout the dumb 'papi chulo' and find yourself a nice 'papi geeko'.

This thread has turned into a fun read.

paintedlady said:

PurpleJedi said:

Well right there is your problem.

Fuggetabout the dumb 'papi chulo' and find yourself a nice 'papi geeko'.

This thread has turned into a fun read.

Yeah I sent this dude an email telling him the next time that he tries to use a really insincere PDA to try to make me jealous, he should try to make it a bit more convincing....oh well, those chicks are stupid for allowing him to make fools of them in front of each other (kissing one girl while the other girl is watching and while I am standing there with my guy friend making him jealous) Oh well, I am going to join the Crazy Cat Lady Army when I approach that age....

Good lord.

PurpleJedi said:

SeventeenDayze said:

By a total accident, I was out and about with another friend who happens to be a guy and then ran into this papi chulo who seemed to really go out of his way to show affection towards one of the broads whom he previously never showed any PDAs towards....wow poetic justice!

Well right there is your problem.

Fuggetabout the dumb 'papi chulo' and find yourself a nice 'papi geeko'.

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

PurpleJedi said:

Well right there is your problem.

Fuggetabout the dumb 'papi chulo' and find yourself a nice 'papi geeko'.

I don't know what this guy's problem is, he must be a glutton for punishment because one of those chicks I am almost positive has a serious issue with mental health and the other one is just a pest. It seems like ignoring him is really the best way to get back at him at this point, but then again why do I need to get back at him if I didn't like him? I feel like an idiot, is there a way to have a lobotomy done on the cheap?

SeventeenDayze said:

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

I don't know what this guy's problem is, he must be a glutton for punishment because one of those chicks I am almost positive has a serious issue with mental health and the other one is just a pest. It seems like ignoring him is really the best way to get back at him at this point, but then again why do I need to get back at him if I didn't like him? I feel like an idiot, is there a way to have a lobotomy done on the cheap?

Dude ain't got the problem...after all he's got females vying for his attention...

LISTEN to your jedi master!

Drop the zero and get with a hero (as in superhero-dressing nerd for comicon)

PurpleJedi said:

SeventeenDayze said:

I don't know what this guy's problem is, he must be a glutton for punishment because one of those chicks I am almost positive has a serious issue with mental health and the other one is just a pest. It seems like ignoring him is really the best way to get back at him at this point, but then again why do I need to get back at him if I didn't like him? I feel like an idiot, is there a way to have a lobotomy done on the cheap?

Dude ain't got the problem...after all he's got females vying for his attention...

LISTEN to your jedi master!

Drop the zero and get with a hero (as in superhero-dressing nerd for comicon)

Yeah agreed, I just got another email from him with all this nonsense in it....he's like, "You think what you've done is so important. You're an empress, goddess and have superior intellect"...this is the type of stuff he says to insult me...geez, LOL.

I think if I had the money right now, I'd just get my tubes tied and get it over with, seriously

SeventeenDayze said:

PurpleJedi said:

Dude ain't got the problem...after all he's got females vying for his attention...

LISTEN to your jedi master!

Drop the zero and get with a hero (as in superhero-dressing nerd for comicon)

Yeah agreed, I just got another email from him with all this nonsense in it....he's like, "You think what you've done is so important. You're an empress, goddess and have superior intellect"...this is the type of stuff he says to insult me...geez, LOL.

I think if I had the money right now, I'd just get my tubes tied and get it over with, seriously

YEAH...it's about time to block his email, no?

Where's Paintedlady and JustErin?...back me up on this...

SeventeenDayze said:

paintedlady said:

This thread has turned into a fun read.

Yeah I sent this dude an email telling him the next time that he tries to use a really insincere PDA to try to make me jealous, he should try to make it a bit more convincing....oh well, those chicks are stupid for allowing him to make fools of them in front of each other (kissing one girl while the other girl is watching and while I am standing there with my guy friend making him jealous) Oh well, I am going to join the Crazy Cat Lady Army when I approach that age....

When I say this, I say this from the bottom of my heart: Can you please stop making a fool of yourself?

missfee said:

missfee said:

ThreadBare said:

missfee said:

What I'm saying is that men generally don't reflect on themselves as far as why they repeatedly have failed relationships or keep meeting whatever their definition is of the "wrong woman" while many women DO sit around wondering whatever it is that they are doing wrong that keeps attracting the "wrong men" to them.

No, I totally do this. Really.

Then you are rare.

missfee said:

ThreadBare said:

missfee said: No, I totally do this. Really.

Then you are rare.

ThreadBare is as rare as they come.

missfee said:

SeventeenDayze said:

Yeah I sent this dude an email telling him the next time that he tries to use a really insincere PDA to try to make me jealous, he should try to make it a bit more convincing....oh well, those chicks are stupid for allowing him to make fools of them in front of each other (kissing one girl while the other girl is watching and while I am standing there with my guy friend making him jealous) Oh well, I am going to join the Crazy Cat Lady Army when I approach that age....

When I say this, I say this from the bottom of my heart: Can you please stop making a fool of yourself?

Man, this (and all the other comments) are the reason I love the Org, seriously, LOLOLOL

PurpleJedi said:

SeventeenDayze said:

Yeah agreed, I just got another email from him with all this nonsense in it....he's like, "You think what you've done is so important. You're an empress, goddess and have superior intellect"...this is the type of stuff he says to insult me...geez, LOL.

I think if I had the money right now, I'd just get my tubes tied and get it over with, seriously

YEAH...it's about time to block his email, no?

Where's Paintedlady and JustErin?...back me up on this...

I'm with Jedimaster here...

Stop getting this guy's mail and ignore that foo'!!!

[Edited 11/29/11 9:22am]

PurpleRighteous1 said:

missfee said:

When I say this, I say this from the bottom of my heart: Can you please stop making a fool of yo urself?

. I have to agree with this. You have allowed way too much of this to go on. You should have ended all unnecessary interactions about 5 emails/internet conversations ago. Just STOP. Stop talking to him, stop listening to him, stop reading his messages, stop acknowledging this asshole's very existence unless you ABSOLUTELY have to for work. You may think you're not falling for his tricks b/c you're not fawning over him but by giving this boy ANY kind of attention you are still, in fact, BEING PLAYED. Leave this user all the way alone. Like someone said before, any emotional turmoil you go through from this point on is your fault

YES, yes, yes, yes, yes!

He is playing you and you are acting like a little naive kitten and respond to every bit of his toys he's throwing at you.

I don't understand how you can perceive yourself as being superior to the other two ladies he is having fun with playing around. They react to him exactly the same way you react to him.

So, please stop being a fool for any male attention you can get. Stay true to yourself and don't respond anymore when he is throwing you bones. Really.

And, I would not be DJJ if I would not recommend you to start reading 'Women who love to much' by Robin Norwood. Treat that book as your bible and don't let him play you.

I think Cerebus should be required high school reading. That's really all I have to say about this.

PunkMistress said:

SeventeenDayze said:

What's a real NFL player compared to a wannabe NFL player? What's a real Versace bag compared to a knockoff? It's kinda like that....

Lots of money.

So a real woman has lots of money?

I am FINALLY a REAL Woman !

Machaela said:

Machaela said:

PunkMistress said:

Lots of money.

So a real woman has lots of money?

I am FINALLY a REAL Woman !

Bare with her. She's young and will learn later on