missfee said:

SeventeenDayze said:

Thanks everyone for the comments Well, I guess it does boil down to the individual but it seems like I keep seeing this same pattern with guys all the time. Right now, there's a dude that I'm catching feelings for (I'm trying NOT to like him but it keeps coming up anyway). Anyway, we do a lot of community activism and whatnot together BUT it seems like these other two broads are circulating around him more and they basically kiss his ass. He KNOWS I am not like that at all. Bird one, she's the type who seems like she constantly texts/calls him and in spite of her being a single mom, she seems to make hella time to be doing all this extra stuff suddenly. Also, this same heffer tried to make me look bad in front of this dude more than once....

Bird two, well she's kinda around but not as much as bird one, but it seems like she throws herself at him...I don't always break his balls but I let him know when something's going good or terribly!

All that said, I will NOT fight over a dude but it's funny, he mentioned something about some random thing he wanted to work on. I challenged him on a few points and he's like, "Oh well, Bird one and bird two are down so" and then I gave him a piece of my mind about how I didn't like his idea because it was a bit of a waste of time, but he seems to appreciate my directness because he keeps communicating with me all the time! But, I wonder why he even bothered specifcally mentioning those two chick to me, am I reading too much into it or was he trying to make me jealous???? There's a lot of us working together but why did he call out those two chicks to me?

I'm gonna let those two birds annoy him to death while I lay in the cut (yes, think of Laydown), and see what happens. I am not old but I am too old for that non-sense!

[Edited 11/22/11 21:55pm]

[Edited 11/22/11 21:58pm]

I think maybe you are reading too much into it. But I also think the guy isn't really worth it. So whatever feelings you have, try your best to minimize them.

Yeah agreed, this stuff has just started recently so I usually lose interest after a few weeks, LOL And, for those of you asking what a real woman is, if you have to ask then seriously, do you know?

uPtoWnNY said:

No more drama for me. I love women who've got their shit together.

BklynBabe said:

men want strippers....

..with REAL tits...

PurpleJedi said:

BklynBabe said:

men want strippers....

..with REAL tits...

Yeah ok, all these guys have such demands when it comes to a woman's appearance while continuing to live under the false assumption that women love fat, bald, arrogant men...

SeventeenDayze said:

PurpleJedi said:

..with REAL tits...

Yeah ok, all these guys have such demands when it comes to a woman's appearance while continuing to live under the false assumption that women love fat, bald, arrogant men...

To be fair, nowadays women have high expectations of men as well.

You received plenty of interesting replies to your thread. I don't really have much to contribute since I'm pretty much clueless to these sort of things myself. However I can assume that the two "birds" hovering around your guy are doing a good job of stroking his ego. And we're suckers for that.

BklynBabe said:

men want strippers....

Or some hybrid of a librarian and a stripper.

A mother figure and a hooker.

SeventeenDayze said:

Thanks everyone for the comments Well, I guess it does boil down to the individual but it seems like I keep seeing this same pattern with guys all the time. Right now, there's a dude that I'm catching feelings for (I'm trying NOT to like him but it keeps coming up anyway). Anyway, we do a lot of community activism and whatnot together BUT it seems like these other two broads are circulating around him more and they basically kiss his ass. He KNOWS I am not like that at all. Bird one, she's the type who seems like she constantly texts/calls him and in spite of her being a single mom, she seems to make hella time to be doing all this extra stuff suddenly. Also, this same heffer tried to make me look bad in front of this dude more than once....

Bird two, well she's kinda around but not as much as bird one, but it seems like she throws herself at him...I don't always break his balls but I let him know when something's going good or terribly!

All that said, I will NOT fight over a dude but it's funny, he mentioned something about some random thing he wanted to work on. I challenged him on a few points and he's like, "Oh well, Bird one and bird two are down so" and then I gave him a piece of my mind about how I didn't like his idea because it was a bit of a waste of time, but he seems to appreciate my directness because he keeps communicating with me all the time! But, I wonder why he even bothered specifcally mentioning those two chick to me, am I reading too much into it or was he trying to make me jealous???? There's a lot of us working together but why did he call out those two chicks to me?

I'm gonna let those two birds annoy him to death while I lay in the cut (yes, think of Laydown), and see what happens. I am not old but I am too old for that non-sense!

[Edited 11/22/11 21:55pm]

[Edited 11/22/11 21:58pm]

Pull up a , my dear.

Girl I've been where you are. Hell, I'm there right now.

And as much as I differ in opinions with JustErin, she's right on this point: "Men like (and stay) with women because of how that woman makes them feel."

Men like it when when a woman strokes their ego, whether it's by compliments, or flirting, or simply an age difference (i.e younger girl takes interest in an older man). All serve as a boost to the ego (which surprisingly, is very fragile). And by the looks of things, these birds are doing that. That's why he keeps them around.

I used to let that hurt me everytime I saw a man choose another over me. But hey, my sister told me some wise words...

"If a man likes you, he will let you know, in some way or other."

Don't do anything you're uncomfortable doing. Never sell out for someone else. And between you and I, this guy doesn't sound like take-home material. If I were you, I'd pull up stakes and just leave this guy behind. You don't need the drama. I can tell you if you let that fester, it will hurt you emotionally. And you sound like too nice a person to have that happen to them.

Feelings are tough. But we're (and yours truly) here for you.

Number23 said:

I'm fucking done with drama queens. Fuck em! May fat black, disease brewing flies lay eggs in their eyes and vaginas. I visit my lifelong male pal just once every few months in his flat - not even 'out' - and I'm demonised as not wanting to be with her, as being an arsehole, despite being there every day and night for weeks! Being the most loving, compassionate and supportive bastard wearing socks walking this planet tonight! Flies! Eyes! Vagina! I wish I was fucking gay sometimes. I really, really do.

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

SeventeenDayze said:

Thanks everyone for the comments Well, I guess it does boil down to the individual but it seems like I keep seeing this same pattern with guys all the time. Right now, there's a dude that I'm catching feelings for (I'm trying NOT to like him but it keeps coming up anyway). Anyway, we do a lot of community activism and whatnot together BUT it seems like these other two broads are circulating around him more and they basically kiss his ass. He KNOWS I am not like that at all. Bird one, she's the type who seems like she constantly texts/calls him and in spite of her being a single mom, she seems to make hella time to be doing all this extra stuff suddenly. Also, this same heffer tried to make me look bad in front of this dude more than once....

Bird two, well she's kinda around but not as much as bird one, but it seems like she throws herself at him...I don't always break his balls but I let him know when something's going good or terribly!

All that said, I will NOT fight over a dude but it's funny, he mentioned something about some random thing he wanted to work on. I challenged him on a few points and he's like, "Oh well, Bird one and bird two are down so" and then I gave him a piece of my mind about how I didn't like his idea because it was a bit of a waste of time, but he seems to appreciate my directness because he keeps communicating with me all the time! But, I wonder why he even bothered specifcally mentioning those two chick to me, am I reading too much into it or was he trying to make me jealous???? There's a lot of us working together but why did he call out those two chicks to me?

I'm gonna let those two birds annoy him to death while I lay in the cut (yes, think of Laydown), and see what happens. I am not old but I am too old for that non-sense!

[Edited 11/22/11 21:55pm]

[Edited 11/22/11 21:58pm]

Pull up a , my dear.

Girl I've been where you are. Hell, I'm there right now.

And as much as I differ in opinions with JustErin, she's right on this point: "Men like (and stay) with women because of how that woman makes them feel."

Men like it when when a woman strokes their ego, whether it's by compliments, or flirting, or simply an age difference (i.e younger girl takes interest in an older man). All serve as a boost to the ego (which surprisingly, is very fragile). And by the looks of things, these birds are doing that. That's why he keeps them around.

I used to let that hurt me everytime I saw a man choose another over me. But hey, my sister told me some wise words...

"If a man likes you, he will let you know, in some way or other."

Don't do anything you're uncomfortable doing. Never sell out for someone else. And between you and I, this guy doesn't sound like take-home material. If I were you, I'd pull up stakes and just leave this guy behind. You don't need the drama. I can tell you if you let that fester, it will hurt you emotionally. And you sound like too nice a person to have that happen to them.

Feelings are tough. But we're (and yours truly) here for you.

Yeah, you're right, I'll just keep my feelings in check and keep stuff on a work-only basis. It's going to be tough but my heart cannot take another break right now....can't deal with that at all.

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

SeventeenDayze said:

Thanks everyone for the comments Well, I guess it does boil down to the individual but it seems like I keep seeing this same pattern with guys all the time. Right now, there's a dude that I'm catching feelings for (I'm trying NOT to like him but it keeps coming up anyway). Anyway, we do a lot of community activism and whatnot together BUT it seems like these other two broads are circulating around him more and they basically kiss his ass. He KNOWS I am not like that at all. Bird one, she's the type who seems like she constantly texts/calls him and in spite of her being a single mom, she seems to make hella time to be doing all this extra stuff suddenly. Also, this same heffer tried to make me look bad in front of this dude more than once....

Bird two, well she's kinda around but not as much as bird one, but it seems like she throws herself at him...I don't always break his balls but I let him know when something's going good or terribly!

All that said, I will NOT fight over a dude but it's funny, he mentioned something about some random thing he wanted to work on. I challenged him on a few points and he's like, "Oh well, Bird one and bird two are down so" and then I gave him a piece of my mind about how I didn't like his idea because it was a bit of a waste of time, but he seems to appreciate my directness because he keeps communicating with me all the time! But, I wonder why he even bothered specifcally mentioning those two chick to me, am I reading too much into it or was he trying to make me jealous???? There's a lot of us working together but why did he call out those two chicks to me?

I'm gonna let those two birds annoy him to death while I lay in the cut (yes, think of Laydown), and see what happens. I am not old but I am too old for that non-sense!

[Edited 11/22/11 21:55pm]

[Edited 11/22/11 21:58pm]

Pull up a , my dear.

Girl I've been where you are. Hell, I'm there right now.

And as much as I differ in opinions with JustErin, she's right on this point: "Men like (and stay) with women because of how that woman makes them feel."

Men like it when when a woman strokes their ego, whether it's by compliments, or flirting, or simply an age difference (i.e younger girl takes interest in an older man). All serve as a boost to the ego (which surprisingly, is very fragile). And by the looks of things, these birds are doing that. That's why he keeps them around.

I used to let that hurt me everytime I saw a man choose another over me. But hey, my sister told me some wise words...

"If a man likes you, he will let you know, in some way or other."

Don't do anything you're uncomfortable doing. Never sell out for someone else. And between you and I, this guy doesn't sound like take-home material. If I were you, I'd pull up stakes and just leave this guy behind. You don't need the drama. I can tell you if you let that fester, it will hurt you emotionally. And you sound like too nice a person to have that happen to them.

Feelings are tough. But we're (and yours truly) here for you.

This is great advice.

whistle said:

BlackAdder7 said:

how do you feel about tits or arse?

i liked big tits when i was younger but they are a sad sight on women my age. i'll go for arse

be careful what you wish for

SeventeenDayze said:

I wonder if there are some guys out there who prefer to have needy, desperate chicks who are always on their case or if they would rather have an independent woman who has her own opinions but is supportive of the guy. It seems like guys aren't really checkin' for real women anymore who have their own life. Why do the drama queens who are real high strung always seem to get the guy?

women who use the needy, drama queen 'help me you big strong man, i need saving' thing to 'attract' a mate usually end up getting exactly what they deserve, controlling, manipulative mates who eventually make their lives hell.

it's one thing to love someone for who they are. quite another to love them for how they make you feel. those romances are made in dysfunctional, USA, and the warranty on them expires in the two seconds it takes to drive down main street.

Funny how desperate, needy people never think of themselves as such.

XxAxX said:

SeventeenDayze said:

I wonder if there are some guys out there who prefer to have needy, desperate chicks who are always on their case or if they would rather have an independent woman who has her own opinions but is supportive of the guy. It seems like guys aren't really checkin' for real women anymore who have their own life. Why do the drama queens who are real high strung always seem to get the guy?

women who use the needy, drama queen 'help me you big strong man, i need saving' thing to 'attract' a mate usually end up getting exactly what they deserve, controlling, manipulative mates who eventually make their lives hell.

it's one thing to love someone for who they are. quite another to love them for how they make you feel. those romances are made in dysfunctional, USA, and the warranty on them expires in the two seconds it takes to drive down main street.

Yeah, I don't think I can play that role of needy so well because it's just not in my nature. I can make a guy feel needed in other ways but it's not like that around the clock. LOL@ made in the dysfunctional USA, good one

Purplethunder---you make a good point. I'm also embarassed that even though I'm trying not to like him and hope the feelings go away, they are not...ugh, it's awful. This doesn't happen to me very often at all, so it's scary

I just prefer women who don't waste my time:

me: "hello there"

the lady:

a) "get out, you're not sexy at all"

b) "yeah, you're hot,... sex?"

end of the story

and while I don't dig ultra-needy women with daddy issues, sometimes it's really cool when girls/women ask you for advice, guidance or just a "strong male hug" when they're feeling low, kinda makes me feel like a strong, loved man, lol

[Edited 11/23/11 11:35am]

This is why God made vibrators.

It helps to own a few.

not saying the OP needs one... just sayin'.

Men don't like desperate at all. They will either run in the opposite direction or worse, use it to their advantage.

paintedlady said:

This is why God made vibrators.

It helps to own a few.

not saying the OP needs one... just sayin'.

Men don't like desperate at all. They will either run in the opposite direction or worse, use it to their advantage.

Yeah, that's one way of looking at things I suppose, LOL. I dunno, it's more about having friendship first and the other stuff after that. I think that's the best way for me to handle it.

paintedlady said:

Men don't like desperate at all. HA, LIE!

They will either run in the opposite direction or worse, use it to their advantage.

ha haaaa! that's more like it, MANY men just LOVE to treat their women like little silly things, women who need their MEN for anything and who also go down regularly...that's the truth...

SeventeenDayze said:

missfee said:

I think maybe you are reading too much into it. But I also think the guy isn't really worth it. So whatever feelings you have, try your best to minimize them.

Yeah agreed, this stuff has just started recently so I usually lose interest after a few weeks, LOL And, for those of you asking what a real woman is, if you have to ask then seriously, do you know?

Yeah, I agree. Men like that are not used to dealing with women like you (ie: self respecting, not desprate, your life isn't defined if you have a man or not type). He lets you know about those women because he knows that you can take him or leave him. So he's putting out the image of how bad he is desired. But men like that want they can't have. And you'e the type of woman that can see through his BS and in your strong state you wouldn't even give him the time of day because he would be wasting YOUR time. Your instincts when you meet this type of guy tells you to keep it moving. And he sees that. So he probably sees you as a challenge. He probably even wants to see how long it takes to "get in the independent/ strong girl's pants". He may seem like a nice guy because of shared interests. But his insecurities lie in the type of chicks he keeps around him and chicks from past relationships.

[Edited 11/23/11 13:00pm]

JoeTyler said:

paintedlady said:

Men don't like desperate at all. HA, LIE!

They will either run in the opposite direction or worse, use it to their advantage.

ha haaaa! that's more like it, MANY men just LOVE to treat their women like little silly things, women who need their MEN for anything and who also go down regularly...that's the truth...

True, you ain't neva lied... "like" is the wrong word.

More like men do not appreciate needy women at all. They use and abuse them.

SeventeenDayze said:

paintedlady said:

This is why God made vibrators.

It helps to own a few.

not saying the OP needs one... just sayin'.

Men don't like desperate at all. They will either run in the opposite direction or worse, use it to their advantage.

Yeah, that's one way of looking at things I suppose, LOL. I dunno, it's more about having friendship first and the other stuff after that. I think that's the best way for me to handle it.

Sometimes as women we need to remember WHY men would want us.

Its best to never focus on who he wants... but why he would want her (or you).

For me I look at a man's character. The fact that he says other women are willing to do x, y, and z for him is telling that he is only about getting HIS needs met only.

lyecry said:

SeventeenDayze said:

Yeah agreed, this stuff has just started recently so I usually lose interest after a few weeks, LOL And, for those of you asking what a real woman is, if you have to ask then seriously, do you know?

Yeah, I agree. Men like that are not used to dealing with women like you (ie: self respecting, not desprate, your life isn't defined if you have a man or not type). He lets you know about those women because he knows that you can take him or leave him. So he's putting out the image of how bad he is desired. But men like that want they can't have. And you'e the type of woman that can see through his BS and in your strong state you wouldn't even give him the time of day because he would be wasting YOUR time. Your instincts when you meet this type of guy tells you to keep it moving. And he sees that. So he probably sees you as a challenge. He probably even wants to see how long it takes to "get in the independent/ strong girl's pants". He may seem like a nice guy because of shared interests. But his insecurities lie in the type of chicks he keeps around him and chicks from past relationships.

[Edited 11/23/11 13:00pm]

Yeah I think you're right. Sometimes, I really get tired of being the good girl but what's the alternative, right? I also figured if I acted like I liked him but didn't really go out of my way too often that he would probably pay more attention, which appears to be the case. I don't know if he's interested in me in that way at this point but I am going to have to try harder to just tune out these feelings and move on to something else. I think sometimes this is why I'm a bit of a workaholic (besides the fact that I'm dead broke, LOL)

I get tired of being a good girl but I cannot change my stripes at this point in the game. Just seems like the bad girls always get the guy at the end...oh well, perhaps I could be a nun

SeventeenDayze said:

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

Pull up a , my dear.

Girl I've been where you are. Hell, I'm there right now.

And as much as I differ in opinions with JustErin, she's right on this point: "Men like (and stay) with women because of how that woman makes them feel."

Men like it when when a woman strokes their ego, whether it's by compliments, or flirting, or simply an age difference (i.e younger girl takes interest in an older man). All serve as a boost to the ego (which surprisingly, is very fragile). And by the looks of things, these birds are doing that. That's why he keeps them around.

I used to let that hurt me everytime I saw a man choose another over me. But hey, my sister told me some wise words...

"If a man likes you, he will let you know, in some way or other."

Don't do anything you're uncomfortable doing. Never sell out for someone else. And between you and I, this guy doesn't sound like take-home material. If I were you, I'd pull up stakes and just leave this guy behind. You don't need the drama. I can tell you if you let that fester, it will hurt you emotionally. And you sound like too nice a person to have that happen to them.

Feelings are tough. But we're (and yours truly) here for you.

Yeah, you're right, I'll just keep my feelings in check and keep stuff on a work-only basis. It's going to be tough but my heart cannot take another break right now....can't deal with that at all.

That. You do not appear to be strong. Not here and probably not to him. But you have already fallen in love with him. He sees/feels that and (subconsciously) takes advantage of it.

Tremolina said:

SeventeenDayze said:

Yeah, you're right, I'll just keep my feelings in check and keep stuff on a work-only basis. It's going to be tough but my heart cannot take another break right now....can't deal with that at all.

That. You do not appear to be strong. Not here and probably not to him. But you have already fallen in love with him. He sees/feels that and (subconsciously) takes advantage of it.

I wrote "can't deal with that at all" because I was talking about how I cannot stand a heartbreak right now. Am I passing off as weak in this message? LOL. Who said I was in love with this dude?

SeventeenDayze said:

lyecry said:

Yeah, I agree. Men like that are not used to dealing with women like you (ie: self respecting, not desprate, your life isn't defined if you have a man or not type). He lets you know about those women because he knows that you can take him or leave him. So he's putting out the image of how bad he is desired. But men like that want they can't have. And you'e the type of woman that can see through his BS and in your strong state you wouldn't even give him the time of day because he would be wasting YOUR time. Your instincts when you meet this type of guy tells you to keep it moving. And he sees that. So he probably sees you as a challenge. He probably even wants to see how long it takes to "get in the independent/ strong girl's pants". He may seem like a nice guy because of shared interests. But his insecurities lie in the type of chicks he keeps around him and chicks from past relationships.

[Edited 11/23/11 13:00pm]

Yeah I think you're right. Sometimes, I really get tired of being the good girl but what's the alternative, right? I also figured if I acted like I liked him but didn't really go out of my way too often that he would probably pay more attention, which appears to be the case. I don't know if he's interested in me in that way at this point but I am going to have to try harder to just tune out these feelings and move on to something else. I think sometimes this is why I'm a bit of a workaholic (besides the fact that I'm dead broke, LOL)

I get tired of being a good girl but I cannot change my stripes at this point in the game. Just seems like the bad girls always get the guy at the end...oh well, perhaps I could be a nun

Be a leader or a follower.

Be a "bad girl" that has a bunch of dicks running though her, being dragged through the mud by some guy that plays hot and cold with your emotions. A few abortions. Emotional baggage left behind from all the shitholes they've fucked. Most of the bad girl types had some type of trauma in their early years that shows up later in their relationships. Molestation, no male figure present.

Be a "good girl" who has goals outside of a man. That won't be manipulated out of giving pussy. Smarter than your avarage bear. That owns her sexuality and knows her power and worth. And you know what? The guy that notices those qualities will KNOW your worth and won't have time to play any games. Becuase he knows that girls like you don't come a dime a dozen. And believe me guys know a woman's worth becuase there is so much easy, thirsty, low self esteem pussy out there. A guy that knows your worth will be willing to work for you and build something with you.

Don't worry about what the "bad girls" are doing. Worry about YOURSELF.

Being a good girl doesn't mean you have to become a nun, because EVERY woman has that dark sexual slut side. Do you want to be a slut with everyone? Or save your "slut" for one lucky man that respect the boundaries of the relationship? His reward for respecting that is he get to see a side of you no one else gets to see AKA "the super freak".

[Edited 11/23/11 21:56pm]

I fall into the good girl category though I am mentally naughty, but feel guilty cause I gave into someone though I took my time and repeatedly kept asserting my power and about what I look for and what it means to be a woman. He was trying to be manipulative and I should have just taken all these signs as a warning to leave, but I didn't right away and went outside myself and lost my head for a little bit. I can't call myself a bad girl though cause I don't sleep around like that, but yeah I had past issues too though I thought I was strong, but maybe felt repressed by then and thought we could work maybe.

[Edited 11/23/11 23:30pm]

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

lyecry said:

SeventeenDayze said:

Yeah I think you're right. Sometimes, I really get tired of being the good girl but what's the alternative, right? I also figured if I acted like I liked him but didn't really go out of my way too often that he would probably pay more attention, which appears to be the case. I don't know if he's interested in me in that way at this point but I am going to have to try harder to just tune out these feelings and move on to something else. I think sometimes this is why I'm a bit of a workaholic (besides the fact that I'm dead broke, LOL)

I get tired of being a good girl but I cannot change my stripes at this point in the game. Just seems like the bad girls always get the guy at the end...oh well, perhaps I could be a nun

Be a leader or a follower.

Be a "bad girl" that has a bunch of dicks running though her, being dragged through the mud by some guy that plays hot and cold with your emotions. A few abortions. Emotional baggage left behind from all the shitholes they've fucked. Most of the bad girl types had some type of trauma in their early years that shows up later in their relationships. Molestation, no male figure present.

Be a "good girl" who has goals outside of a man. That won't be manipulated out of giving pussy. Smarter than your avarage bear. That owns her sexuality and knows her power and worth. And you know what? The guy that notices those qualities will KNOW your worth and won't have time to play any games. Becuase he knows that girls like you don't come a dime a dozen. And believe me guys know a woman's worth becuase there is so much easy, thirsty, low self esteem pussy out there. A guy that knows your worth will be willing to work for you and build something with you.

Don't worry about what the "bad girls" are doing. Worry about YOURSELF.

Being a good girl doesn't mean you have to become a nun, because EVERY woman has that dark sexual slut side. Do you want to be a slut with everyone? Or save your "slut" for one lucky man that respect the boundaries of the relationship? His reward for respecting that is he get to see a side of you no one else gets to see AKA "the super freak".

[Edited 11/23/11 21:56pm]

Well said.

ThreadBare said:

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

Pull up a , my dear.

Girl I've been where you are. Hell, I'm there right now.

And as much as I differ in opinions with JustErin, she's right on this point: "Men like (and stay) with women because of how that woman makes them feel."

Men like it when when a woman strokes their ego, whether it's by compliments, or flirting, or simply an age difference (i.e younger girl takes interest in an older man). All serve as a boost to the ego (which surprisingly, is very fragile). And by the looks of things, these birds are doing that. That's why he keeps them around.

I also agree you shouldn't get too bent out of shape over this guy. He sounds like he's all about attention and manipulation. That said, the point about men staying with women who make us feel "good" also applies to men who seriously invest in relationships and are looking to settle down. If it feels like we're the only ones doing the work, we'll leave. (Just sticking up for my species.) Hang in there

Yesterday, something happened at the last minute that upset him because it hadn't been done. Apparently, he asked a bunch of other people to help him get something done and it didn't happen. So, we're up chatting online for like 2 hours and he's basically complaining about how frustrated he is and how much he wants to quit, etc. I first told him that's what he gets for not asking me to help, then I helped him get the problem fixed. I dunno, perhaps I was stupid for helping him and maybe I wasn't....judging by what he was writing he seemed genuinely upset about a lot of things in general...

ThreadBare said:

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

Pull up a , my dear.

Girl I've been where you are. Hell, I'm there right now.

And as much as I differ in opinions with JustErin, she's right on this point: "Men like (and stay) with women because of how that woman makes them feel."

Men like it when when a woman strokes their ego, whether it's by compliments, or flirting, or simply an age difference (i.e younger girl takes interest in an older man). All serve as a boost to the ego (which surprisingly, is very fragile). And by the looks of things, these birds are doing that. That's why he keeps them around.

I also agree you shouldn't get too bent out of shape over this guy. He sounds like he's all about attention and manipulation. That said, the point about men staying with women who make us feel "good" also applies to men who seriously invest in relationships and are looking to settle down. If it feels like we're the only ones doing the work, we'll leave. (Just sticking up for my species.) Hang in there

Everyone wants to feel validated and loved. Nothing wrong with that.