1. If there is no automatic door, Don't hold doors for people as you enter or exit. Especially if they have heavy shopping.

2. Sneeze all over the open salad cart. You know, the coleslaw, chopped beetroot, olives and shit

3. Go up to the most well dressed ethnic minority you can find and just start asking them where a product is as if they must work there

4.

Go through the express lane with more than the item limit.

Wait until everything is rung up and bagged - and then pull out your checkbook.

Take the whole damn family with you and let the kids run amok.

Actually eat - in the store - from the salad bar. With your fingers. (I actually saw someone do this.)

9.) do like mandinko

wait 'til you get to the counter and you total is due,

then break out you bag of loose pennies

10. Park your shopping cart in the middle of the damn aisle & block the rest of it with your fat ass as you sit there for 20minutes deciding what fuckin' can of green beans you want to buy.

dressed like you just got out of bed. I swear I've seen people in their dirty pajamas and house shoes. wtf

park your cart in the aisle and leave it there, stand unmoving in the middle of the aisle and pay no attention when others need to go by, park your cart in the shopping lane and leave it there, park your cart in the parking lot and leave it there....... walk three abreast down the aisles and block the entire lane.. last time i went shopping i swear i thought i was being punked. everytime i turned around someone was blocking me in.... craaaaazzzy

Whip out 19,500,000 coupons at checkout. Oh yes, and make sure to argue with the checkout clerk for 15 minutes that the jello is actually $1.18 per box rather than the $1.23 that you were charged.

PurpleJedi said:

10. Park your shopping cart in the middle of the damn aisle & block the rest of it with your fat ass as you sit there for 20minutes deciding what fuckin' can of green beans you want to buy.

OMG! I was going to post something similar!

Order 10 different things at the deli.... pause between items to ask which brand is better, ask to taste a sample, and then quibble over the thinness of the slices.

Have no consideration for the people standing in line behind you by slowing the cashier down, engrossing them in long, meaningless conversations.

chocolate1 said:

PurpleJedi said:

10. Park your shopping cart in the middle of the damn aisle & block the rest of it with your fat ass as you sit there for 20minutes deciding what fuckin' can of green beans you want to buy.

OMG! I was going to post something similar!

Start ringing up your stuff at self-checkout before the person in front of you bags his/her things.

chocolate1 said:

Start ringing up your stuff at self-checkout before the person in front of you bags his/her things.

I've never had that happen to me.

PurpleJedi said:

chocolate1 said:

Start ringing up your stuff at self-checkout before the person in front of you bags his/her things.

I've never had that happen to me.

Maybe the people near me are just obnoxiously hasty.

chocolate1 said:

Stand 2 inches behind me in the cashier's line & breathe down my neck.

damosuzuki said:

ZombieKitten said:

damosuzuki said:

Stand 2 inches behind me in the cashier's line & breathe down my neck.

I thought you liked it!

damosuzuki said:

Stand 2 inches behind me in the cashier's line & breathe down my neck.

OH GOD YES!!!

I will turn around and ask if we're together.

open a milk and drink as much as you can before you get to the counter

start an arguement with the clerk about the freshness of the milk (try to draw

the people in line behind you into it) say "I AIN'T PAYIN FOR THIS!!!"

then fart... THAT"S RIGHT! let that one RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP

then pay and walk out without the milk

ThisOne said:

Fart and quickly walk away

That's called crop dusting and is a favorite passtime of airline crew. When I was much younger I used to work in a really large sports shoe shop and when I was bored (and gassy) I'd quietly walk by the lone couples facing the shoe wall "crop dust" and be back behind the counter 15 yards away by the time it hit. Was funny watching them blame each other.

Ahh, happy times.

damosuzuki said:

Stand 2 inches behind me in the cashier's line & breathe down my neck.

Whenever that happens I take a step back and hopefully

I land on their foot.Oops I'm sorry. They usually back off then.

SuperSoulFighter said:

ZombieKitten said:

I thought you liked it!

I thought you never left the house?!?

ZombieKitten said:

SuperSoulFighter said:

I thought you never left the house?!?

That is true

But I astral travel to supermarkets in Canada to get spruce beer and moose flavour potato chips

At the meat counter ask for a sample of ham, then go to the bread counter and ask for a sample bread roll, then ask the greengrocer for a sample of lettuce. Then make a sammich n ask the security guard if he can get u a cup of water as u eat yo sammich leaning against a shopping trolley

Stare at any woman below the age of 70 and follow her around the store waiting for an opportunity to ask her some random lame ass cliche' grocery store chat up line like "Hi, Do you have any idea how I cook this Okra. Can I suck yo tits?"

ZombieKitten said:

SuperSoulFighter said:

I thought you never left the house?!?

That is true But I astral travel to supermarkets in Canada to get spruce beer and moose flavour potato chips

I thought you had pulled off a neat trick & made a creative stereotype, but google tells me that both are real products.