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Thread started 05/25/12 8:07am

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Beer-guzzling cows crash backyard party

Beer-guzzling cows crash backyard party

http://usnews.msnbc.msn.c...party?lite

Cows on the loose in Boxford, Mass., crashed a backyard party last weekend, and went right for the beer.

“They enjoyed it. There’s no doubt about it. They went right for the beer and then when one was done, they’d knock another one over and take care of that beer,” Lt. James Riter of the Boxford Police Department told NBC affiliate WHDH.com.

Police said they heard reports of screams from a group of women as five or six cows stumbled into the yard, eagerly hurtling toward the beers.

“They got up as the cows went toward the table. They stepped back and the cows took over the table, knocking over the beers with their noses, drinking the beer off the table. They went to the recycling bin to find any leftovers,” Riter told the TV station.

A caller told the 911 dispatcher: “We thought they were deer, but they're huge, huge, huge cows. There's got to be five or six of them.”

Andrea Poritzky also called 911 after spotting "about six cows" in her yard.

"I don't own cows,” she said.

“I was initially a little nervous. And then after I found it very comical and not very surprising due to the fact that we live in the country here,” Poritzky said.A police escort rounded up the cows and returned them to a farm about a mile away.

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Reply #1 posted 05/25/12 8:25am

imago
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Reply #2 posted 05/25/12 9:06am

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neutral biggrin

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Reply #3 posted 05/25/12 9:12am

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i'd just like to hear from Cow, see if someone should post bail

By Katie Kindelan

May 24, 2012 3:14pm

Cows Crash Mass. Beer Party and Drink Up

Massachusetts police responding to a call from a neighborhood party found out that they had, very literally, some wild animals on their hands.

Police in Boxford, Mass., arrived at the scene of a backyard party on Sunday night to find six cows helping themselves to a table full of beer.

The cans of beer were left behind by the 12 or 13 young adult females who had been enjoying their Sunday night when the cows crashed their party in Boxford, a Boston suburb with a population of nearly 8,000, according to police.

“I could hear them [the partygoers] screaming in the backyard and I hoped they weren’t getting trampled,” Lt. James Riter told WickedLocal Boxford, which first reported the story.

“I saw one cow drinking the beer on its way down as it spilled off the table,” he told the site. “Some of the cows were also picking through the empties in the recycling bin. They just went in and helped themselves.”

Lt. Riter was first put on the cows’ trail around 9 p.m. when the department received a call that six cows were loose in the rural town’s Main Street area. Riter and his partner, officer Joseph Borodawka, drove behind the cows in their cruiser. But that sent the cows off the main road and into the surprised partygoers’ path.

“The young women were absolutely in shock,” Ritter told WickedLocal Boxford.

Also involved in the cow chase was the town’s selectman, Peter Perkins, who lives near the farm from where the cow escaped. He heard the commotion on the police scanner and jumped in his car with his wife and the cow’s owner to retrieve them.

“Because the cows were having such a good time at the [party] house, it was hard to get them to leave,” Perkins said. “Once we got them started, there was a lot of hollering and yelling to keep them moving. We had a cruiser positioned at the front and back of the cows.”

One hour later, the cows were safely back at home, party over, according to police.

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Reply #4 posted 05/25/12 9:18am

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I wish someone there had taken some video... I'd love to see this!!! lol

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Reply #5 posted 05/25/12 9:19am

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Those were not actually cows. Those were horses disguised as cows, trying to besmirch the good name of cows everywhere. Cows do not imbibe your human demon rum or, in this case, demon Heineken. Okay so occasionally, on a slow day, I might enjoy a little wine with my cud but that's all.

Damn you horses!

Eat Mor Horses

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Reply #6 posted 05/25/12 9:27am

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shiloh66 said:

I wish someone there had taken some video... I'd love to see this!!!

me too biggrin maybe it will surface later on once those poor laides have regained their equilibrium falloff

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Reply #7 posted 05/25/12 9:30am

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Cow said:

Those were not actually cows. Those were horses disguised as cows, trying to besmirch the good name of cows everywhere. Cows do not imbibe your human demon rum or, in this case, demon Heineken. Okay so occasionally, on a slow day, I might enjoy a little wine with my cud but that's all.

Damn you horses!

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Reply #8 posted 05/25/12 10:08am

Timmy84	Slow news day? Oh wait everyday's a slow news day. Oh well... I wanna see footage.
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Reply #9 posted 05/25/12 10:26am

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Timmy84 said:

Slow news day?

Oh wait everyday's a slow news day.

Oh well... I wanna see footage.

All cow news is important...even news about imposter horses pretending to be drunken cows to besmirch our good name.

There needs to be a lot more cow-related news stories, features, etc.

What about a separate section just called Bovine Discussion, mods?

Horses are not only raging alcoholics but many of them are also heavily addicted to crack.

Eat Mor Horses

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Reply #10 posted 05/25/12 10:27am

Cow said:

Timmy84 said:

Slow news day?

Oh wait everyday's a slow news day.

Oh well... I wanna see footage.

All cow news is important...even news about imposter horses pretending to be drunken cows to besmirch our good name.

There needs to be a lot more cow-related news stories, features, etc.

What about a separate section just called Bovine Discussion, mods?

Horses are not only raging alcoholics but many of them are also heavily addicted to crack.

lol

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Reply #11 posted 05/25/12 11:04am

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Cow said:

Timmy84 said:

Slow news day?

Oh wait everyday's a slow news day.

Oh well... I wanna see footage.

All cow news is important...even news about imposter horses pretending to be drunken cows to besmirch our good name.

There needs to be a lot more cow-related news stories, features, etc.

What about a separate section just called Bovine Discussion, mods?

Horses are not only raging alcoholics but many of them are also heavily addicted to crack.

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Reply #12 posted 05/25/12 12:43pm

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XxAxX said:

Cow said:

All cow news is important...even news about imposter horses pretending to be drunken cows to besmirch our good name.

There needs to be a lot more cow-related news stories, features, etc.

What about a separate section just called Bovine Discussion, mods?

Horses are not only raging alcoholics but many of them are also heavily addicted to crack.

Lies, all lies!!!

Okay, some cows may occasionally partake in beer...or the occasional shot of Jack. Or 17 shots of Absinthe. I mean really, it's a lot of pressure being a cow, with everyone blaming us all the time for destroying the ozone layer and whatnot.

But I continue to insist that horses suck. Which I realize is not the point but it needs to be said.

And yes, I am slightly drunk right now.

Eat Mor Horses

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Reply #13 posted 05/25/12 12:46pm

Timmy84	I'm cool with horses and cows but it's that damn seagull that keeps stealing potato chips at convenience stores y'all need to be worried about. He's way more dangerous. Way more.
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Reply #14 posted 05/25/12 1:12pm

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Damn seagulls. Damn horses. Cows rule!

I am so drunk right now.

Oh hell, I just tipped myself.

Anyone got a crane or something?

Eat Mor Horses

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Reply #15 posted 05/25/12 1:26pm

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I'm not a fan, but I don't think it's cool to refer to the Kardashians as "cows"

My Legacy
http://prince.org/msg/8/192731

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Reply #16 posted 05/25/12 1:57pm

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NDRU said:

I'm not a fan, but I don't think it's cool to refer to the Kardashians as "cows"

Lies! Kardashians are not cows. Just because you humans don't want to claim them don't give to us!

Eat Mor Horses

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Reply #17 posted 05/25/12 2:21pm

Cow said:

Those were not actually cows. Those were horses disguised as cows, trying to besmirch the good name of cows everywhere. Cows do not imbibe your human demon rum or, in this case, demon Heineken. Okay so occasionally, on a slow day, I might enjoy a little wine with my cud but that's all.

Damn you horses!

Ya know, it's hard out here for a cow... lol

Prince, in you I found a kindred spirit...Rest In Paradise.

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Reply #18 posted 05/25/12 2:23pm

babynoz	Timmy84 said: I'm cool with horses and cows but it's that damn seagull that keeps stealing potato chips at convenience stores y'all need to be worried about. He's way more dangerous. Way more. LOL! Probably some reincarnated old coot that used to shop there, Prince, in you I found a kindred spirit...Rest In Paradise.
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Reply #19 posted 05/25/12 3:50pm

GottaLetitgo	[Edited 5/25/12 16:01pm] [Edited 5/25/12 16:04pm] All good things they say never last...
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Reply #20 posted 05/25/12 4:05pm

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Cow said:

Damn seagulls. Damn horses. Cows rule!

I am so drunk right now.

Oh hell, I just tipped myself.

Anyone got a crane or something?

spit

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Reply #21 posted 05/26/12 7:25am

ThisOne	XxAxX said: Cow said: Damn seagulls. Damn horses. Cows rule! I am so drunk right now. Oh hell, I just tipped myself. Anyone got a crane or something? and i was going 2 ask if cow was tipsy...... but then i saw this post mailto:www.iDon'tThinkSo.com.Uranus
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