Tonight after dinner my youngest nephew came up,and gave me a hug,then he says sorry,and walks away,I said sorry for wha..but before I can finish my sentence I realize that he has farted. He then turns to me laughing,and says Happy Birthday!















[Edited 5/20/09 22:12pm]

I'm always having to do that. I'll be in my study, only place I get a little privacy and one of the kids will come in and I'm like "oh, sorry baby" and they will run out screaming after a second.

I was dating a single mother. We'd had a number of dates, and one evening she felt it was the right time to bring her 9-year-old son along.

We're at a pizzeria, watching basketball and cracking jokes. Everything seems to be going well. Her son was a bit hyper but seemed to be cool with the outing.

Still, it was unclear to me whether he grasped the larger the context of our all being out.

Then, from out of nowhere, he blurts out with a mouthful of pizza: "I look like my daddy."

My little one said "It's very soggy today mummy, isn't it?"
He meant foggy

ZombieKitten said:

Screaming? Poor kids.

EmeraldSkies said:

yeah, milk doesn't agree with me, but sometimes I still have some

you can't beat farts for getting a laugh. my daughter (6) always denies them. she blames them on her brother even when he is not in the room.

My 8 year old says "snowtado" instead of "tornado" he can't get right
my 2 year old scraped her knee went into the bathroom and stuck a pantyliner on it and came outside.

irrisistableB said:

My sisters did that when they were younger. They were messing in the bathroom,and when my Mom went in to see what they were doing they both had a maxi pad stuck to there foreheads.
[Edited 5/21/09 20:33pm]

One time I was watching the Muppets with my sister when she was a little baby. Pigs in space came on and when the spaceship zoomed in and filled up the TV screen she scrambled, turning around clutching me tightly and said "I'm Scary"

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

My daughter started to read when she was about 3 years old, before she could contextualize the stuff she saw.

My wife, my daughter and I were driving down the street one day, and my daughter asks, "What's a whore?"

Needless to say, we were... surprised. But we've always been pretty open about things -- just age-appropriate. My wife goes through some long schpiel about our bodies, modesty, etc., and she explained essentially that whores are those who like to show their privates to too many inappropriate people. My daughter understood, but she had a look on her face like WTH!?!

I asked her, "Sweety, where did you hear about whores?" She answers, "The sign on that store. It says 'Open 24 whores.' "

Lammastide said:

My son, then 4 yrs old, came in while I was changing his 1 month old brother's diaper. The 4 yr old was looking at the industrial size package of diapers. It shows the different stages of diapers for babies and a picture of a baby for that stage.
He is reading "There's a lying down baby, there's a sitting up baby, theres's a crawling baby, there's a walking baby...Hey, why didn't we get a walking baby!"

EmeraldSkies said:

Kids say and do the funniest things.

My middle nephew, when he was about two, would say, "It bwoke!" every time something was not working properly. He would kind of shrug his shoulders while saying "It bwoke!", as if to say, "I don't know what happened; I didn't do it!" Now various members of my family will say "It bwoke" with the shrug just to be funny, every time something is not working properly.

My oldest nephew would say, "What's that?!" every time he saw something in food that did not look good to him. I remember one time my mom bought vanilla ice cream that had bits of vanilla bean in it. My nephew would not eat the ice cream, because it had black specks in it. This was when he was much younger. He's almost 10 years old now, and eats everything in sight. It is just a phase that I'm sure a lot of kids go through.

irrisistableB said:

Lammastide said:

Wow, your daughter started reading when she was 3? Smart little girl!

psychodelicide said:

She learned to talk pretty early, too. Hasn't shut her mouth since.

Lammastide said:

awww wait till she's a teen

Lammastide said:

Lammastide said:

Awww, I'll bet she's a real cutie.

Lammastide said:

Lammastide said:

Isn't it funny,when they aren't talking you are in anticipation of what their first word will be,but once they get the hang of it,you sometimes wish for the silence again.
[Edited 5/21/09 13:27pm]

Lammastide said:

I got one of them too! Feels the need to fill every silence with the sound of her own voice

You teach them to walk and talk and then when they do, you keep wishing they'd shut up and sit down

I was watching an epsiode of Brothers and Sisters and my 4 year old came in and started to watch. There was a scene where Ally McBeal lady asks Rob Lowe to marry him, he left this long pause and Faye piped up 'Errr... that'll be a no then' and walked off I nearly wet meself!

MrsGoodnight said:

One of my kids was crying and lefting his foot, I got panicked I thought he stepped on a needle or a sharp object,,,,turned out he was having abit of a "stone shit" situation

Momma, its so hard!

Harlepolis said:

Awww bless him

heybaby said:

that's priceless!!!!

MrsGoodnight said:

u called calista/kitty Ally McBeal
i can never remember the characters names when talking about shows