to have the most incredible sex with someone you are not in Love with?

mirrorbestfriend said:

You will never know

Are you speaking from experience....do tell

Yes I think it is possible!

And we're off!

This is actually a good question.

Yes, of course it's possible.

yes

ThreadCula said:

The majority of my best sex is with someone I barely have feelings for, so I agree.

Imago said:

Well, of course.

Physical chemistry doesn't have to be tied to love.

Actually, in my world they have absolutely nothing to do with each other. It's just nice when being in love with someone an having amazing sexual chemistry happens.

Imago said:

self loathing is really something you should talk to your therapist about

Anything is possible especially when you are shallow...
doesn't take much

JustErin said:

shanti0608 said:

So what exactly are you saying?

Yes, it is.

JustErin said:

That if you are shallow and not very deep then of coarse having great sex without feelings is very possible.
If it is all about yourself then of coarse it can be great because you do not have to focus on the other person really.
I agree that it is possible to have one without the other..just as it is possible to have great sex with someone you love...

shanti0608 said:

I still don't really follow. Are you saying that having sex with someone that you don't really care deeply about makes you shallow and selfish?

shanti0608 said:

It also could be cultural or a personal view of sex though.

For example, Thai's view sex in a much more playful manner than Americans do. They have fun with it, and it doesn't necessarily have the same "communion with god" overtones to it.
So one-off sexual encounters wouldn't be viewed as a shameful or bad thing necessarily.
But they aren't by any means "shallow" compared to Americans. I mean, the idea of sending parents off to a nursing home in Thailand would be so utterly dreadful, that if you asked me, we're far more shallow.

As far as the view of sex.

Sex, to me is not a statement of love or how much we care for each other. I think when you love someone dearly, sex actually even becomes secondary to that.

They're 'almost' mutually exclusive I think, so a really great "non-shallow" person can have the best sex without having to be in love with someone.

I'm going to stay out of this one.

I'm going to sit back and watch and wait...

JustErin said:

No I am not saying THAT makes them shallow..they usually already are. I find ppl like the creator of this thread to be shallow...just going by previous threads and posts.
Some ppl like being shallow and that is cool with me.
Just saying if someone is shallow I could see where it would be easier to have great sex because it is only about their feelings and pleasing themselves..which is much easier to do it you do not have to worry about someone else's feelings and if you are pleasing them....
It takes all types...

shanti0608 said:

The creator of this thread is going to disagree with me, but I'm pretty sure he's just taking a piss whenever he starts these things.

JustErin said:

I cant speak for Val but i do think we see things similarly on this. Yes you can have great SEX with a person you don't love, of course that is possible however as you mentioned earlier Erin it is great when you love someone and there is great sexual chemistry. For me that moves things to a different level. There is a deeper connection and it moves from SEX to making love there is a difference not only in feelings but often in desires and needs to both give and receive on an emotional and physical level. In my experience sex/love making is definately a wholly better experience when you truly love the person you are with.
On that level therefore there is a depth of feeling that contributes however if its just sex/fucking there is not that depth or connection and therefor by definition that connection is shallower. That does not imply shallowness in the person although that can be the case in certain circumstances. I guess shallowness could be defined in some circumstances as simply being after what it is that YOU want and sometimes if its just sex then that is totally the case.
IMHO

Agreed that if you're in love with someone that the love making will be better. But, sometimes you have great physical chemistry with someone and the sex is amazing. It's not really a problem I don't think as long as both people are on the same page.

Sometimes you just want to have sex because you're horny!!! It's a normal human need all of us have. No shame in it.

So, my answer to the question is a resounding YES!

I don't know..we all have our opinions and views on love and sex. It is all good


All I can say is that I cannot wait to fuck the one I love...counting the days...

Maybe that makes me shallow

shanti0608 said:

Doesn't make you shallow at all! I think it's sweet...

mdiver said:

Thant's cool.

I just personally disagree with everything you said...and that's from my personal experience with having sex with someone was I was madly in love with and having sex with someone I actually kinda hated.

I just meant that it's nice to have great sex with someone that you also love and are exclusive with....but for me it doesn't make it any more hot or special.

JustErin said:

Hey i am cool with that too...hell as long as we are all getting great sex (unlike the author a self confessed virgin so quite what his frame of reference is i dont know) who gives a crap

shanti0608 said:

No....that make you hot and guaranteed booty is on its way

hokie1 said:

Thanks....me too.
We have fun having sex, making love, just doing it when we are horny, fucking - all of that...
would not change a thing.


It is a first for me to have both...usually I only have one or the other.
[Edited 9/9/07 10:25am]

shanti0608 said:

Yes!

You keep screwing long enough you'll love her!