XxAxX said:

KeithyT said:

Her life, her body, her love, her memories, her decision, her happiness, her pain, her joy, her book, her money, her truth.

No need to bash anybody.

This. Well said.

I agree with you.

CatB said:

PeteSilas said:

you think so? I thought that's just how prince dealt with everything, just pretend it's no big deal and bury himself in work. Prince was a strong person, i can see that having something to do with how he died too, just a freakishly uncompromising, strong individual who wouldn't tolerate anything but excellence.

You don't go on OPRAH for that.

When you have an album coming out (which he did - Emancipation was released in November of 1996), you sure as hell do.

susan rogers was asked what one word would sum prince up, she almost said discipline but she said courage. No matter what he was going through, no matter how sick he was he would be there working. Sometimes the best thing you can do is carry on, falling apart certainly wasn't an option was it?

Prince's ex-wife Mayte Garcia on singer's drug use: 'There were disturbing occasions'

https://www.yahoo.com/new...57374.html

[Edited 3/16/17 9:03am]

why is that link dead? I assume Mayte will also say something about the fabled overdose on asperin and wine that Prince supposedly had in 96 too.

PeteSilas said:

ufoclub said:

"Push on" is exactly what he did, in denial. Even saying publicly, everything was fine. That is a problem. "PRETEND it's no big deal". Well life is not pretend. It's real. Denial is a weakness that you mask as strength in your mind even though to everyone around you in the know, you are being weak.

I personally wish he had not been in denial and not tried to always paint a picture of idealic fantasy. The reason? He might still be alive today and sharing his incredible creativity.

maybe that's all he knew how to do, I don't think it's fair to judge him for it. Maybe you'd be happy if he'd had a nervous breakdown and dissapeared from the public eye for the rest of his life. Some people have surmised that's what killed him too, him almost dying, pretending everything is fine and then dying a few days later. Maybe that was his only strategy for dealing with things, it took him through a lot. Sometimes, if you do not trust anyone, you know better than to show vulnerability. It was a difficult situation, there was no way that he could have handled it that would have made everything alright. And we know he dealt with it privately like he did most things. I really do believe that while he wanted fame, he also desperately wanted privacy too. That's why to this day, the people around him won't tell us everything about what killed him. they knew he wouldn't want that and to date they are respecting that but we'll just have to see how long that lasts.

Thank you. Dude was not going to have no nevrous breakdown on National T.V. What good would that have done for anyone other than people who want to see you weak? He got thrown into the streets when he was young and once said he raised himself you do not go throught that being a weak person. In addtion, as a husband and a man he was suppose to be strong in the public. I am sure he cried behind closed doors and grieved for that child. It is mean and nasty to imply anything else when we simply were not around to see him breakdown.

here's the only thing i saw regarding mayte's drug allegations:http://people.com/music/prince-ex-wife-mayte-garcia-never-saw-drugs-admits-disturbing-incidents/

PeteSilas said:

susan rogers was asked what one word would sum prince up, she almost said discipline but she said courage. No matter what he was going through, no matter how sick he was he would be there working. Sometimes the best thing you can do is carry on, falling apart certainly wasn't an option was it?

It was not an option for him and some people on this board need to stop projecting.

That dude helped loads of people with medical bills and funerals he had compassion for people.

This chick is twisting this to get people to buy a book. If he was my brother I would call her out her name every which would that I could. I wish he made better choices with the women he married as I feel he had a serious flaw when it came to women.

PeteSilas said:

ufoclub said:

"Push on" is exactly what he did, in denial. Even saying publicly, everything was fine. That is a problem. "PRETEND it's no big deal". Well life is not pretend. It's real. Denial is a weakness that you mask as strength in your mind even though to everyone around you in the know, you are being weak.

I personally wish he had not been in denial and not tried to always paint a picture of idealic fantasy. The reason? He might still be alive today and sharing his incredible creativity.

maybe that's all he knew how to do, I don't think it's fair to judge him for it. Maybe you'd be happy if he'd had a nervous breakdown and dissapeared from the public eye for the rest of his life. Some people have surmised that's what killed him too, him almost dying, pretending everything is fine and then dying a few days later. Maybe that was his only strategy for dealing with things, it took him through a lot. Sometimes, if you do not trust anyone, you know better than to show vulnerability. It was a difficult situation, there was no way that he could have handled it that would have made everything alright. And we know he dealt with it privately like he did most things. I really do believe that while he wanted fame, he also desperately wanted privacy too. That's why to this day, the people around him won't tell us everything about what killed him. they knew he wouldn't want that and to date they are respecting that but we'll just have to see how long that lasts.

I really appreciate the "push on" post, and we know the poster wouldn't have been happy for a nervous breakdown in and of itself. If the scenario you described, with breakdown and dissapearance from the public eye did in fact happen to an artist, there might well be many things gained and many things lost for all involved.

This brings me to what I appreciate about your comment. I appreciate you pointing out that there was probably no path that would be at all easy, just paths with different joys and different losses. In a way, this is an obvious fact about life and the choices people make, but it's somehow still something that I, personally, can't be reminded of enough.

PeteSilas said:

here's the only thing i saw regarding mayte's drug allegations:http://people.com/music/prince-ex-wife-mayte-garcia-never-saw-drugs-admits-disturbing-incidents/

She said he told her in 96 he drank too much wine with aspirin because he said he had terrible migraine headaches.

rogifan said:

PeteSilas said:

why is that link dead? I assume Mayte will also say something about the fabled overdose on asperin and wine that Prince supposedly had in 96 too.

Try that link again: https://www.yahoo.com/new...57374.html

rednblue said:

PeteSilas said:

maybe that's all he knew how to do, I don't think it's fair to judge him for it. Maybe you'd be happy if he'd had a nervous breakdown and dissapeared from the public eye for the rest of his life. Some people have surmised that's what killed him too, him almost dying, pretending everything is fine and then dying a few days later. Maybe that was his only strategy for dealing with things, it took him through a lot. Sometimes, if you do not trust anyone, you know better than to show vulnerability. It was a difficult situation, there was no way that he could have handled it that would have made everything alright. And we know he dealt with it privately like he did most things. I really do believe that while he wanted fame, he also desperately wanted privacy too. That's why to this day, the people around him won't tell us everything about what killed him. they knew he wouldn't want that and to date they are respecting that but we'll just have to see how long that lasts.

I really appreciate the "push on" post, and we know the poster wouldn't have been happy for a nervous breakdown in and of itself. If the scenario you described, with breakdown and dissapearance from the public eye did in fact happen to an artist, there might well be many things gained and many things lost for all involved.

This brings me to what I appreciate about your comment. I appreciate you pointing out that there was probably no path that would be at all easy, just paths with different joys and different losses. In a way, this is an obvious fact about life and the choices people make, but it's somehow still something that I, personally, can't be reminded of enough.

absolutely, sometimes life doesn't give you win/lose options, sometimes it's lose/lose/lose and you just have to get through it somehow. My brother almost ended up homeless when our mom died, me, having been through a lot more heartache in my life didn't really know how to just stop everything. I just couldn't, I missed a day or two of school and then I got right back to work before i was so far behind that i'd never catch up. Our life in this society really doesn't make it easy for someone to fall apart, or to grieve, or to slow down. What can we do about that? we didn't create this system, but we can't just let it chew us up. Don't they say most people are a couple paychecks from being homeless? It doesn't take much to fall apart, I've seen it happen to stronger men than me and a lot of it just comes right out of the meanness of other people. So, in that way, i get where prince is coming from. So screw all the people saying prince should have handled it better/different.

rednblue said:

CatB said:

I was meaning to say that he wasn't strong.

I'm struck by your words here.

Some people are describing the strength involved with Prince's work ethic and some of what he worked straight through and how he was known for pressing on ahead, sometimes in the face of unimaginable exhaustion and crushing life events.

I read something recently where a writer said maybe one of Prince's greatest strengths was also one of his greatest vulnerabilities.

Does this ring true to you at all?

Yes, hence my agreeing with what this poster said:

ufoclub said:

"Push on" is exactly what he did, in denial. Even saying publicly, everything was fine. That is a problem. "PRETEND it's no big deal". Well life is not pretend. It's real. Denial is a weakness that you mask as strength in your mind even though to everyone around you in the know, you are being weak.

I personally wish he had not been in denial and not tried to always paint a picture of idealic fantasy. The reason? He might still be alive today and sharing his incredible creativity.

This burying himself in work is a very good expression when it comes to Prince, by the way.

However, I was not so much referring to his approach when it came to professional matters but to his dealing with his personal tragedies. Masking is a very good word here. To the outside, everything was always cool but as I said he had many shoulders to cry on behind the scenes, many who had to listen to him and pick him up again. Be part of the game.

Don't misunderstand me, as some here know, I spent some time with him and there are no words for the love I still feel for the man but I see him for what he was, not for the image he projected.

[Edited 3/16/17 9:32am]

sonshine said:

rogifan said:

It's in the book because she needs something to sell the book and apparently she didn't think discussing (or exploiting imo) her son's death was enough. I say again, if this was M2 releasing a book very few, if anyone, would be defending her here. For some reason M1 gets a pass. I'm with Prince over all of this:

Prince isn't here. Plus none of us were any more than strangers to him. So lets stop thinking we can speak for him. And until any one presents their health care credentials or has personal first hand experience with substance abuse, specifically opiod-related, please refrain from commenting on the subject. Trust me you are so off base with your opinions and assumptions it boggles my mind why anyone would continue to make comments that only underscore their ignorance. This is why that subject got banned. Uneducated people turning the subject matter into a shit show with their ignorance. As far as the book goes I've stated my opinion. In short this is all much ado about nothing. There were books before. There will be books after. Get over it. It takes a hella nerve to question the sincerity of one's love for another. It's shameful really. The fact you can say such things on a public forum and still sleep at night is scary. What gives you the right? The level of self-righteousness of some people is truly a mental disorder.

She tried to put this book out when he was alive and well and guess what he stopped. So we know he would not have liked it. End of story.

Do you think Mrs high school diploma Mayte has any knowledge about substance abuse to know what the hell she is talking about?

I think we are all capable of reading and many do have people in their lives grappling with this issue. We have had people on this board who claim to be medical professionals who get shouted down because they do not back up 20 year stedy diet of pain pills and working like a demon with no effecto on him as possible.

No one has to get over anything and no one gets to tell people what to say. Mayte is being taken to task because many of the things she is saying are the exact opposite of what she said before and her ablity to make money off her sons death is tacky. People are going to call her on it and they are doing all across the internet. So she had better get use to it. Please do not think she will be the only person who will get this treatment. She wanted to be first so she can take the heat from being first.

HerecomethePurpleYoda said:

PeteSilas said:

why is that link dead? I assume Mayte will also say something about the fabled overdose on asperin and wine that Prince supposedly had in 96 too.

Try that link again: https://www.yahoo.com/new...57374.html

thanks, just read it.

PeteSilas said:

rednblue said:

I really appreciate the "push on" post, and we know the poster wouldn't have been happy for a nervous breakdown in and of itself. If the scenario you described, with breakdown and dissapearance from the public eye did in fact happen to an artist, there might well be many things gained and many things lost for all involved.

This brings me to what I appreciate about your comment. I appreciate you pointing out that there was probably no path that would be at all easy, just paths with different joys and different losses. In a way, this is an obvious fact about life and the choices people make, but it's somehow still something that I, personally, can't be reminded of enough.

absolutely, sometimes life doesn't give you win/lose options, sometimes it's lose/lose/lose and you just have to get through it somehow. My brother almost ended up homeless when our mom died, me, having been through a lot more heartache in my life didn't really know how to just stop everything. I just couldn't, I missed a day or two of school and then I got right back to work before i was so far behind that i'd never catch up. Our life in this society really doesn't make it easy for someone to fall apart, or to grieve, or to slow down. What can we do about that? we didn't create this system, but we can't just let it chew us up. Don't they say most people are a couple paychecks from being homeless? It doesn't take much to fall apart, I've seen it happen to stronger men than me and a lot of it just comes right out of the meanness of other people. So, in that way, i get where prince is coming from. So screw all the people saying prince should have handled it better/different.

I'm so sorry to hear of the painful times you've been through. I'm glad to hear that you have music and other passions to bring you comfort and joy.

PeteSilas said:

rednblue said:

I really appreciate the "push on" post, and we know the poster wouldn't have been happy for a nervous breakdown in and of itself. If the scenario you described, with breakdown and dissapearance from the public eye did in fact happen to an artist, there might well be many things gained and many things lost for all involved.

This brings me to what I appreciate about your comment. I appreciate you pointing out that there was probably no path that would be at all easy, just paths with different joys and different losses. In a way, this is an obvious fact about life and the choices people make, but it's somehow still something that I, personally, can't be reminded of enough.

absolutely, sometimes life doesn't give you win/lose options, sometimes it's lose/lose/lose and you just have to get through it somehow. My brother almost ended up homeless when our mom died, me, having been through a lot more heartache in my life didn't really know how to just stop everything. I just couldn't, I missed a day or two of school and then I got right back to work before i was so far behind that i'd never catch up. Our life in this society really doesn't make it easy for someone to fall apart, or to grieve, or to slow down. What can we do about that? we didn't create this system, but we can't just let it chew us up. Don't they say most people are a couple paychecks from being homeless? It doesn't take much to fall apart, I've seen it happen to stronger men than me and a lot of it just comes right out of the meanness of other people. So, in that way, i get where prince is coming from. So screw all the people saying prince should have handled it better/different.

Cosign they were not in his shoes. It is okay to demonize him but his ex wife gets a pass.

sonshine said:

Genesia said:

CatB said:

You don't go on OPRAH for that.

When you have an album coming out (which he did - Emancipation was released in November of 1996), you sure as hell do.

Going on Oprah is not burying yourself in work, it's putting yourself out there. He could have done it, withdrawing again and only trust the music. He could have called it off. Everyone would have understood. To sit on a show (and not even having told his wife in advance) that sells by playing on people's emotions, with eyes that tell the whole story, that's not Prince being strong. It was Prince again who had so many feelings and words inside but couldn't articulate them. The child that hopes the older ones will just see and understand and tell him it's not his fault and everything's gonna be alright.

laurarichardson said:

Thank you. Dude was not going to have no nevrous breakdown on National T.V. What good would that have done for anyone other than people who want to see you weak? He got thrown into the streets when he was young and once said he raised himself you do not go throught that being a weak person. In addtion, as a husband and a man he was suppose to be strong in the public. I am sure he cried behind closed doors and grieved for that child. It is mean and nasty to imply anything else when we simply were not around to see him breakdown.

I can't believe how you are characterizing and judging Prince with only your opinion as support. Assuming that if he honestly admitted the tragedy it would result in a nervous breakdown. Or that he had to, as a husband or man, be strong in public. That last bit there is especially horrible backwards ass thinking. Especially regarding a human being who made popular art out of the notion of being honest about his feminine side, his sensitive romanticsm, and physical sexuality with no shame. That idea of requirement to be strong in public as a masculine duty has led to a lot of evil in the world and a lot of hurt and death.

"Check this, she wanted me to talk her! Can you picture that?"

"Baby doll, can you get the hell away from that thing you call a man"

ufoclub said:

laurarichardson said:

He was a strong person who was going to push on. I do not buy the psycho babble.

"Push on" is exactly what he did, in denial. Even saying publicly, everything was fine. That is a problem. "PRETEND it's no big deal". Well life is not pretend. It's real. Denial is a weakness that you mask as strength in your mind even though to everyone around you in the know, you are being weak.

I personally wish he had not been in denial and not tried to always paint a picture of idealic fantasy. The reason? He might still be alive today and sharing his incredible creativity.

I really appreciate this post. There is no lack of respect for work ethic, or lack of understanding what staying afloat can require, in your statement. I think it's kind and wise to care about harm from denial. It can ravage a person.

PurpleMedley122 said:

sonshine said:

Prince isn't here. Plus none of us were any more than strangers to him. So lets stop thinking we can speak for him. And until any one presents their health care credentials or has personal first hand experience with substance abuse, specifically opiod-related, please refrain from commenting on the subject. Trust me you are so off base with your opinions and assumptions it boggles my mind why anyone would continue to make comments that only underscore their ignorance. This is why that subject got banned. Uneducated people turning the subject matter into a shit show with their ignorance. As far as the book goes I've stated my opinion. In short this is all much ado about nothing. There were books before. There will be books after. Get over it. It takes a hella nerve to question the sincerity of one's love for another. It's shameful really. The fact you can say such things on a public forum and still sleep at night is scary. What gives you the right? The level of self-righteousness of some people is truly a mental disorder.

Thank you. I swear you would think that Mayte was pure evil the way they talk about a still grieving mother on here. Or that Prince just dropped dead or was murdered by the illuminati or something. It's embarrassing.

i think it's natural, people love someone, they don't want to see things making the person look bad. it happened with Elvis too, journalists, great, smart journalists couldn't get past hating priscilla for 1. divorcing elvis and 2. writing a book that is most likely a lot worse than mayte's. Lisa Marie still hates most of the bodyguards around elvis for writing the books they did, surprising that she didn't hold her mom to the same standard because her mom made public some real bad stuff.

PeteSilas said:

PurpleMedley122 said:

sonshine said: Thank you. I swear you would think that Mayte was pure evil the way they talk about a still grieving mother on here. Or that Prince just dropped dead or was murdered by the illuminati or something. It's embarrassing.

i think it's natural, people love someone, they don't want to see things making the person look bad. it happened with Elvis too, journalists, great, smart journalists couldn't get past hating priscilla for 1. divorcing elvis and 2. writing a book that is most likely a lot worse than mayte's. Lisa Marie still hates most of the bodyguards around elvis for writing the books they did, surprising that she didn't hold her mom to the same standard because her mom made public some real bad stuff.

Thank you for that larger perspective.

PeteSilas said:

CatB said:

I was meaning to say that he wasn't strong.

well, can't agree with you there then.

No problem, it's all good.

CatB said:

rednblue said:

Yes, hence my agreeing with what this poster said:

ufoclub said:

"Push on" is exactly what he did, in denial. Even saying publicly, everything was fine. That is a problem. "PRETEND it's no big deal". Well life is not pretend. It's real. Denial is a weakness that you mask as strength in your mind even though to everyone around you in the know, you are being weak.

I personally wish he had not been in denial and not tried to always paint a picture of idealic fantasy. The reason? He might still be alive today and sharing his incredible creativity.

This burying himself in work is a very good expression when it comes to Prince, by the way.

However, I was not so much referring to his approach when it came to professional matters but to his dealing with his personal tragedies. Masking is a very good word here. To the outside, everything was always cool but as I said he had many shoulders to cry on behind the scenes, many who had to listen to him and pick him up again. Be part of the game.

Don't misunderstand me, as some here know, I spent some time with him and there are no words for the love I still feel for the man but I see him for what he was, not for the image he projected.

[Edited 3/16/17 9:32am]

I can't thank you enough for your insights and your beautiful words, and I have enjoyed hearing you other threads. Thank you for the note about "bury," and I also noticed the word sweet in one of your earlier posts. If you don't know someone, and only see them on camera, it's near impossible to get a real sense and also not be fooled. Therefore, I've been hesitant to make much of it, but he sometimes projects something much like a sweetness--very subtle, but very striking at the same time (if that makes any sense). Yet it seems that he, like a lot of people, could be sweet and could also be cruel.

Do you think some of the anguish, on this and some other threads, might partly come from people (including me) having difficulty wrapping their minds around the idea of genuine sweetness and cruelty existing in the same person? When we step back, we see it's a part of human nature, perhaps some even recognize the capacity in themselves at times. But for me, at least, it's so hard to reconcile.

Anyway, having borrowed your words, I don't want to make assumptions. Just thought I'd ask if you thought this stuff might be in the mix at all when it comes to some of the difficulties on threads like this.

Prince was a genius, but he was also damaged goods, pyschologically, from childhood on. This is just my opinion, but I think that colored everything he did inter-personally. Whether it was the control freak aspect, or the apparent failure to form any lasting bond with just about anybody - all from childhood. There is no way a teenager could deal with someone like that - someone upon whom she was financially dependent. Someone she loved. I do think the huge tat after his death was ridiculous, but that is just me. So she wrote a book. Big deal. He is still a genius. He is still adored. She just drew back the curtain a bit, that's all.

rednblue said:

ufoclub said:

"Push on" is exactly what he did, in denial. Even saying publicly, everything was fine. That is a problem. "PRETEND it's no big deal". Well life is not pretend. It's real. Denial is a weakness that you mask as strength in your mind even though to everyone around you in the know, you are being weak.

I personally wish he had not been in denial and not tried to always paint a picture of idealic fantasy. The reason? He might still be alive today and sharing his incredible creativity.

I really appreciate this post. There is no lack of respect for work ethic, or lack of understanding what staying afloat can require, in your statement. I think it's kind and wise to care about harm from denial. It can ravage a person.

But we do not know he was in a state of denial because he did not make a public statement. I do not think when you prepare your child's funeral you are in a state of denial.

At the end of the day it was just not the public's business.

CatB said:

Genesia said:

When you have an album coming out (which he did - Emancipation was released in November of 1996), you sure as hell do.

Going on Oprah is not burying yourself in work, it's putting yourself out there. He could have done it, withdrawing again and only trust the music. He could have called it off. Everyone would have understood. To sit on a show (and not even having told his wife in advance) that sells by playing on people's emotions, with eyes that tell the whole story, that's not Prince being strong. It was Prince again who had so many feelings and words inside but couldn't articulate them. The child that hopes the older ones will just see and understand and tell him it's not his fault and everything's gonna be alright.

Ummmm...yes, it is. Honoring a commitment that has been made far in advance to coincide with an album release is part of the work. He went on tour in 1997, too - also burying himself in work, while appearing publicly.

You seem to think that he could only bury himself in his work in a studio or something. The definition of burying oneself in work is using the work you do as a distraction. The fact that you could see him doesn't mean he hadn't withdrawn. To someone with Prince's single-mindedness, withdrawal didn't have to mean that he was hiding physically.

Between October of 1996 (when Amiir died) and June of 1998 (basically, the space of a year-and-a-half), he released Emancipation, New Power Soul and Crystal Ball, and did the Jam of the Year tour. If that isn't burying yourself in work, I don't know what is.