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Thread started 09/20/16 2:21pm

DiamondStarr

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Grief

Not sure this is the place to post this but I feel that I can't be the only Prince fan who's struggling with inexplicable grief over his death. I still cry quite often and I never even met the man, much less pretend to know who he was as a person. But I just can't shake this grief. Every time I read a story or watch a Youtube vid about people telling their stories about Prince, and what a kind, giving, creative, spiritual, intellectual and compassionate genius he was, here come the tears again. I'm sure my husband and friends think I've lost my mind, so I do my best not to cry in front of anyone anymore, but they just don't know that I, myself don't understand it either.

Never have I felt this way about any other famous person who's passed on, and I hope I never do again because this really hurts. He should be here, doing what he does. Instead, he's not... I know God has a place and a plan for everyone. Common sense tells me that is was just him time to leave, but that still doesn't make the tears stop.

Is there anyone else out there still struggling with this "grief"? I know I can't be the only one, so I set an account here to hopefully talk to others who are "suffering" like I am for no darned explicable reason that I can think of. I've cried more over this man whom I've never met, than I have over my own family members that have passed. What the hell is wrong with me??

If there's anyone else out there, who'd like to discuss their Prince related grief, please post here. If you have a story to tell, I'd love to hear it. Maybe we can help each other heal.

Thanks for listening...

Sweet wind blew
Not a moment to soon.
I cry when I realized
That sweet wind was you.
(Tears go here)
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Reply #1 posted 09/20/16 2:51pm

ufoclub

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You just got to grieve and let yourself process it. It's horrible, yes, and there's the realization that we all have to pass on at some point. But there does come a way to look at it from the side of enjoying what was and what is still here, the art.



All of us fanatics had him in our imaginations as a friend, a hero, a teacher, a jester... making him even more real than actual people in our lives. It's because he put out so much.

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Reply #2 posted 09/20/16 5:13pm

Lovejunky

You are definately NOT alone...

There are many people experiencing his loss in deep and profound ways...

He is NOT An ordainairy human being...Thats Clear to me now...

Many people describe a feeling in their Gut like being Love sick...

Like when your dearly beloved is away from you and you pine for them...

Its coupled with seperation pain that sits on the edge of almost hurting so much that you could throw up...

and then there is the melancholy.....

He is gone, but he seems more alive then ever....

I have come to a stage where I actually enjoy the bitter sweet feelings...

I have been inspired to look within, and get serious about my spiritual journey...

Just as he did...

[Edited 9/20/16 17:15pm]

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Reply #3 posted 09/20/16 5:29pm

rvafanatic

You are not alone. Still crying intermittently, especially when I read posts like yours because I am in the same emotional boat.
Wondering why others around me give me the sideeye when I talk about him. So I shut down and turn up the music.
Tattoo-less and proud...
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Reply #4 posted 09/20/16 6:05pm

roxy831

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Lovejunky said:

You are definately NOT alone...

There are many people experiencing his loss in deep and profound ways...

He is NOT An ordainairy human being...Thats Clear to me now...

Many people describe a feeling in their Gut like being Love sick...

Like when your dearly beloved is away from you and you pine for them...

Its coupled with seperation pain that sits on the edge of almost hurting so much that you could throw up...

and then there is the melancholy.....

He is gone, but he seems more alive then ever....

I have come to a stage where I actually enjoy the bitter sweet feelings...

I have been inspired to look within, and get serious about my spiritual journey...

Just as he did...

[Edited 9/20/16 17:15pm]

THIS^^^^! Exactly how I describe my grief. Cried HARD tears for 3 months. August came, and I'm at least strong enough to keep most of my tears from falling. Then today....oh today, grief hit me like a ton of bricks all over again. Let the waves of grief come and return back to the sea over and over again. I've come to a point of acceptance now, and the journey has brought me back to my spiritual connection with God in more ways than one. You are definitely not alone!

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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Reply #5 posted 09/20/16 6:49pm

BT11

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Same here. Even after 5 months. He inspired me on several levels, also professionally (his sheer ambiton and uniqueness). He was the soundtrack of my adult life; discovered him when I was around 17 and I am 30 now.

Still listening to him constantly (right now 'Still Would Stand All Time') and enjoying the unreleased tracks coming forward.

Anyway, you are not alone! I also find comfort in visiting the org very much.

[Edited 9/20/16 18:50pm]

music
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Reply #6 posted 09/20/16 7:07pm

IsufferfromMPS

All the above. At least here I don't feel like Im losing it or something is wrong with me. People here are feeling the same way. I have spent 37yrs adoring this man and he's gone. I will always miss him. It will get easier as time goes on im sure, but it is what it is for right now.

Prince was more than just a entertainer, cant really describe it but its something powerful. That's very evident in the fact that there are so many still feeling this way 5mos later
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Reply #7 posted 09/20/16 7:17pm

1contessa

I think of Prince often, and there are times that I still can't believe he's gone. Even the coming season of Fall and Winter makes me think of him, because I've always associated cold weather with Minnesota, the place where Prince lived, and it makes me feel sad because he's no longer with us. I know that I never knew him, and he never knew I even existed, but I feel like I lost a loved one.

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Reply #8 posted 09/20/16 7:39pm

musicfan77

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DiamondStarr said:

Not sure this is the place to post this but I feel that I can't be the only Prince fan who's struggling with inexplicable grief over his death. I still cry quite often and I never even met the man, much less pretend to know who he was as a person. But I just can't shake this grief. Every time I read a story or watch a Youtube vid about people telling their stories about Prince, and what a kind, giving, creative, spiritual, intellectual and compassionate genius he was, here come the tears again. I'm sure my husband and friends think I've lost my mind, so I do my best not to cry in front of anyone anymore, but they just don't know that I, myself don't understand it either.



Never have I felt this way about any other famous person who's passed on, and I hope I never do again because this really hurts. He should be here, doing what he does. Instead, he's not... I know God has a place and a plan for everyone. Common sense tells me that is was just him time to leave, but that still doesn't make the tears stop.



Is there anyone else out there still struggling with this "grief"? I know I can't be the only one, so I set an account here to hopefully talk to others who are "suffering" like I am for no darned explicable reason that I can think of. I've cried more over this man whom I've never met, than I have over my own family members that have passed. What the hell is wrong with me??



If there's anyone else out there, who'd like to discuss their Prince related grief, please post here. If you have a story to tell, I'd love to hear it. Maybe we can help each other heal.



Thanks for listening...





Yes, my sister is tired of me talking about him. I have been watching his videos every night for 4 months now. I grew up in the 80s, and recall going to the theater to see Purple Rain and hearing his songs on the radio all the time. He was the soundtrack to my life. The performances on stage were like no other artist. The energy on stage, the timing, the band in sync with every move was insane. Name an artist today, that can play 27 instruments, sing, write music, hit songs nonetheless,dance, perform, engage his audience,choragraph a show, and have a style with clothes, not to mention having his own color. He was one of a kind, extremely rare, and so dam cute. Everytime, he walked on stage, people could not get enough of him. Many people feel very emotional over losing Prince. Stevie Wonder, Van Jones, CNN reporters crying over his loss. Prince was very special. We will never have anyone like Prince, and that is what makes his loss so hard to accept.
[Edited 9/20/16 19:43pm]
[Edited 9/20/16 19:46pm]
fan for life
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Reply #9 posted 09/20/16 7:55pm

lucylula

I too am in exactly the same boat as you hug Prince's music has been my drug for 30 years, some people smoke, drink etc but for me it's Prince's music that has got me through everything in life, both good and bad. I know we will always have that but knowing he has gone somehow seems to have affected my listening. I am really grateful to know that there are people out there who understand and that this fantastic forum exists for us all.
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Reply #10 posted 09/20/16 8:23pm

least87

Thank you so much for starting this topic. I was thinking the very same thing earlier tonight. I totally understand how you are feeling because I am feeling much the same way. The sense of loss and grief that I feel is overwhelming and I have not experienced this before. Just today, when I read the story in Rolling Stone, I almost felt sick about the changes being made to Paisley Park and have to remind myself "he's gone" and things have to move forward. Just before Prince died, I experienced a significant family loss and have to think there's some connection. I keep thinking I just need to let myself go through the grief and eventually it will be less painful. With the 6-month anniversary tomorrow, there's no sign yet. I so appreciate this site and all the discussion. It is a comfort to know I am nt the only one. Thank you, all!
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Reply #11 posted 09/20/16 8:36pm

twinnies

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I never got a chance to see Prince in person and I'm still grieving his passing.

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Reply #12 posted 09/20/16 8:59pm

phatphuk

DiamondStarr said:



"...I still cry quite often and I never even met the man...Common sense tells me that is was just him time to leave, but that still doesn't make the tears stop..."





I'm not trying to be funny. But you — and others experiencing the same kind of "suffering" as you — seriously should not rule out seeking professional counseling.



Do yourselves a favor.



    “Sometimes People Don't Want To Hear The Truth Because They Don't Want Their Illusions Destroyed” — Friedrich Nietzsche 
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Reply #13 posted 09/20/16 10:52pm

Asenath0607

phatphuk said:

DiamondStarr said:



"...I still cry quite often and I never even met the man...Common sense tells me that is was just him time to leave, but that still doesn't make the tears stop..."





I'm not trying to be funny. But you — and others experiencing the same kind of "suffering" as youseriously should not rule out seeking professional counseling.



Do yourselves a favor.

Why?



[Edited 9/20/16 22:54pm]

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Reply #14 posted 09/20/16 11:59pm

morningsong

I don't know if this will help it's a long talk and it covers all kinds of grief, but maybe somebody will get something.

The Myth of Closure

http://www.onbeing.org/pr...io?embed=1
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Reply #15 posted 09/21/16 12:53am

JoeyCococo

morningsong said:

I don't know if this will help it's a long talk and it covers all kinds of grief, but maybe somebody will get something.

The Myth of Closure

http://www.onbeing.org/pr...io?embed=1


Not alone...I feel the same and have curtailed my sorrow in front of people as I. Can't leton how bothered I still am. I am deeply impacted now and then ...Bill's tribute at BET, Janelle's explosion after her BET set....watchivideos of him on top of his game....The Ladder, The LAST December... everything.

I too wander how I can feel this bad for someone I never met. Well, I believe it is b/c of his sincerity in his art that has caused such a deep connection with us. He truly believed in his work and was fully committed at all times.

Time will heal but as someone else said, he seems alive still as we keep finding new leaks, new songs, shows etc.he left so many treasures.
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Reply #16 posted 09/21/16 1:39am

Lovejunky

JoeyCococo said:

Time will heal but as someone else said, he seems alive still as we keep finding new leaks, new songs, shows etc.he left so many treasures.

He Died to LIVE

Another AMAZING dimension to his Legacy

The PRINCE left himself behind for US ,in the form of

A Paisley Palace,

Purple Pyramids,

A sign to LOVE

And a Vault of Priceless Treasures in the Form of

The One Sound

0)+>

I dont think that we will live to see the extent of his impact on Planet Earth

Its growing expodentially every day....

* Raised hands ,to the most Intriguing personality since Jesus *

THere ..I said it


[Edited 9/21/16 1:41am]

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Reply #17 posted 09/21/16 2:16am

PeteSilas

every day, every single day. why him? why that way? life/god has a cruel sense of irony. I just watched a vid on youtube about paisley park, circa 88, where one guy raved about his work ethic saying he did more in one year than a lot of hardworking artists did in five. just a freak and a force of nature, why him? And if he could get lost somehow, what is the hope for the rest of us schmucks?

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Reply #18 posted 09/21/16 2:44am

jayseajay

You are not alone...and it is hard, because ppl in our day to day life mostly don't get it, and its easy to feel like you're being judged, or to judge yourself for it, but it is what it is, and I've been trying very hard to just let it be, and to know that there are lots and lots of other people who feel it to. I think there are a whole buch of reasons why it feels like this. First of all, as some people have said, we felt, and we still feel very connected to him...and yes, we didn't know him personally, but at the same time he poured so much of himself into that work, and it's incredibly emotionally and spiritually and energetically communicative....and if you're open to it, you can really feel it...and that's what he wanted, he wanted to feel connected in that way, he wanted to touch people, and it really mattered to him...I don't think it's some kind of mass hallucination or projection on our part...it's there, it's in the music...his soul is in the music...just right there. And then he goes and dies in this awful terrible incomprehensible way which is, in many ways, completely out of character...and it's a total shock, and really hard to understand, and feels just incredibly wrong...and at the same time, very little comes back to us from the people around him which acknowledges that we have a meaningful connection to him and that we really care about him and need to understand what happened to him. I feel the message we get irom a lot of people is bascially, 'you're just fans and you don't really know this person'...and I'm not blaming the people around him for the way its gone down, there are many understandable reasons for that...but it does feel quite dismissive...and I don't think it reflects what P felt about his fans at all...it's kind of interesting for example that the only plans he left were for what to do with PP as a place for fans to come and visit. The family have done the best they could under a terrible set of circumstances, but yeah...it's been hard when P spent so much time building such strong connection with people to just be shut out like that. So all of this together is really a recipe for a lot of grief I think. It's not weird. He was an incredibly powerful creature, and he left, just like that, with no warning, and in a really distressing way, and coming to terms with it takes a lot of time, and that's okay....

Not like I love my guitar....
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Reply #19 posted 09/21/16 2:52am

jjam

I think it's very important to get on with one's life, but...this has been much harder than I anticipated. I heard Purple Rain in a shop the other day and got very teary. And I cried watching the Vikings half time tribute.

I always knew I'd find it tough when Prince would eventually pass, thinking he'd last for a few more decades. But I never expected him to die so young and so suddenly. This is what makes it particularly hard to rationalise his passing. It still all seems so very surreal.

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Reply #20 posted 09/21/16 5:08am

CherryMoon57

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jayseajay said:

You are not alone...and it is hard, because ppl in our day to day life mostly don't get it, and its easy to feel like you're being judged, or to judge yourself for it, but it is what it is, and I've been trying very hard to just let it be, and to know that there are lots and lots of other people who feel it to. I think there are a whole buch of reasons why it feels like this. First of all, as some people have said, we felt, and we still feel very connected to him...and yes, we didn't know him personally, but at the same time he poured so much of himself into that work, and it's incredibly emotionally and spiritually and energetically communicative....and if you're open to it, you can really feel it...and that's what he wanted, he wanted to feel connected in that way, he wanted to touch people, and it really mattered to him...I don't think it's some kind of mass hallucination or projection on our part...it's there, it's in the music...his soul is in the music...just right there. And then he goes and dies in this awful terrible incomprehensible way which is, in many ways, completely out of character...and it's a total shock, and really hard to understand, and feels just incredibly wrong...and at the same time, very little comes back to us from the people around him which acknowledges that we have a meaningful connection to him and that we really care about him and need to understand what happened to him. I feel the message we get irom a lot of people is bascially, 'you're just fans and you don't really know this person'...and I'm not blaming the people around him for the way its gone down, there are many understandable reasons for that...but it does feel quite dismissive...and I don't think it reflects what P felt about his fans at all...it's kind of interesting for example that the only plans he left were for what to do with PP as a place for fans to come and visit. The family have done the best they could under a terrible set of circumstances, but yeah...it's been hard when P spent so much time building such strong connection with people to just be shut out like that. So all of this together is really a recipe for a lot of grief I think. It's not weird. He was an incredibly powerful creature, and he left, just like that, with no warning, and in a really distressing way, and coming to terms with it takes a lot of time, and that's okay....

yeahthat

Life Matters
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Reply #21 posted 09/21/16 7:03am

MysticalChick

phatphuk said:

DiamondStarr said:



"...I still cry quite often and I never even met the man...Common sense tells me that is was just him time to leave, but that still doesn't make the tears stop..."





I'm not trying to be funny. But you — and others experiencing the same kind of "suffering" as you — seriously should not rule out seeking professional counseling.



Do yourselves a favor.





UGH. What a cruel answer there. True to your username.

Diamondstar: here's what I've learned and experienced: For some reason, Prince's death and the subsequent grief dredges up old grief that hasn't yet been processed. I've seen it over and over and over from all different people. Perhaps that's what's going on here.

Regardless, it's good to talk about it and process it (in places where people won't suggest you need mental health help) so that you can move through it.

"So this is where U end, and U and I begin ..."

Thanks for being my mystical unicorn.
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Reply #22 posted 09/21/16 7:11am

DiamondStarr

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least87 said:

Thank you so much for starting this topic. I was thinking the very same thing earlier tonight. I totally understand how you are feeling because I am feeling much the same way. The sense of loss and grief that I feel is overwhelming and I have not experienced this before. Just today, when I read the story in Rolling Stone, I almost felt sick about the changes being made to Paisley Park and have to remind myself "he's gone" and things have to move forward. Just before Prince died, I experienced a significant family loss and have to think there's some connection. I keep thinking I just need to let myself go through the grief and eventually it will be less painful. With the 6-month anniversary tomorrow, there's no sign yet. I so appreciate this site and all the discussion. It is a comfort to know I am nt the only one. Thank you, all!

<3

Sweet wind blew
Not a moment to soon.
I cry when I realized
That sweet wind was you.
(Tears go here)
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Reply #23 posted 09/21/16 7:27am

Dibblekins

I get it.

.

I keep telling myself off, saying, 'this is ridiculous; get a grip' but his music; his words; his persona...They touch my soul, and it's both wonderful, and terribly painful.

.

I've thrown myself into my work, and I shed my tears in private - but even there I'm embarrassed about them. Why? Why should we feel bad for feeling???

.

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Reply #24 posted 09/21/16 7:53am

jayseajay

MysticalChick said:

Diamondstar: here's what I've learned and experienced: For some reason, Prince's death and the subsequent grief dredges up old grief that hasn't yet been processed. I've seen it over and over and over from all different people. Perhaps that's what's going on here.

Yes. This also. 1000x. I've been trying to take it as an opportunity.

Not like I love my guitar....
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Reply #25 posted 09/21/16 8:04am

1Sasha

My heart is shattered. The heartache continues. I have never felt this way about another person who has passed. No one I know even cares about him. The org is the only place I can share my thoughts about him, and I am most grateful for everyone here. For your understanding. I honestly think if he had a terminal illness, or was in a plane crash, or died in a similar way, it might almost be better for those who are grieving. But this man who was so inclusive, who cared so much about the fams and his world, for him to die alone, from a drug overdose, as if he had no one and trusted no one to help him ... That is heartwrenching for me. It will take time. I'll be able to get by, but I can still cry at any moment over him.

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Reply #26 posted 09/21/16 8:09am

jayseajay

1Sasha said:

But this man who was so inclusive, who cared so much about the fams and his world, for him to die alone, from a drug overdose, as if he had no one and trusted no one to help him ... That is heartwrenching for me.

That's the thing that really breaks me as well. sad sad sad

Not like I love my guitar....
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Reply #27 posted 09/21/16 8:12am

roxy831

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jayseajay said:

MysticalChick said:

Diamondstar: here's what I've learned and experienced: For some reason, Prince's death and the subsequent grief dredges up old grief that hasn't yet been processed. I've seen it over and over and over from all different people. Perhaps that's what's going on here.

Yes. This also. 1000x. I've been trying to take it as an opportunity.

Yeah, NO....I'm not dredging up old grief. Thanks for the false diagnosis, tho. confused

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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Reply #28 posted 09/21/16 8:41am

sonshine

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You've come to the right place. So many people here feel exactly the same way. Just when I think im getting better, something rips the wound wide open again. If it wouldn't be for this place I wouldn't have any way to process the grief. Sharing your feelings or just being amongst like minded people has been at least somewhat healing. It's amazing the effect that man had on us. It's amazing to me that not everyone is as shattered as I was. How can anyone be immune to him. I've been helpless when it comes to Prince since I was 20 yrs old snd he was about 25 at the time. Powerless to his magnetic charm and talent.
It's a hurtful place, the world, in and of itself. We don't need to add to it. We all need one another. ~ PRN
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Reply #29 posted 09/21/16 9:25am

PurpleDiamonds
1

You are not alone comfort hug
I feel like many others that posted.
My heart is still hurting, the tears still fall and the hurt is felt daily.
Prince was so much more than a musician, he had a different energy, like a positive bright force and the world just feels different with out him.

I agree with what Lovejunky said....
Raised hands, to the most intriguing personality since Jesus.
He was indeed sent from above and I feel so fortunate to have been a part of this journey.
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