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Thread started 11/09/16 8:19am

roxy831

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Acceptance Feels Weird

This is the first month since his death that I can go days without crying or feeling heavy-hearted about his passing. It feels weird, like I should never stop mourning him. I know I was tired of crying. I know I wanted to move forward, but now that I'm here, it feels weird. How's everybody else doing? Purple love to you all.

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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Reply #1 posted 11/09/16 8:55am

LBrent

I've also gone several days at a time without crying, but last night I made the mistake of looking at, of all things, the P Tasting Menu from PP...and I sobbed uncontrollably for awhile thinking how he had enjoyed those foods but now...

I got so angry afterwards. Not for any reason that I can articulate, but really angry. Like I needed to punch sommething really hard. I didn't do it but that feeling was very strong until I fell asleep.

I feel better this morning.

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Reply #2 posted 11/09/16 9:04am

Poorlovelycomp
uter

Ok...I Ignored it as much as possible when it first happened. I occupied my mind with other things as to not really have to fully take it in.The man,the artist,and musician who played a major part in my life. The many hours spent in my bedroom imprinting the songs into my being.the years he created music impacted my whole life. Through his lyrics he knew he would be leaving here soon accepting his passing actually makes us look at our own lives
[Edited 11/9/16 9:18am]
[Edited 11/9/16 9:19am]
[Edited 11/9/16 9:25am]
"love's the only drug we do in here"-Prince
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Reply #3 posted 11/09/16 9:47am

laurarichardso
n

roxy831 said:

This is the first month since his death that I can go days without crying or feeling heavy-hearted about his passing. It feels weird, like I should never stop mourning him. I know I was tired of crying. I know I wanted to move forward, but now that I'm here, it feels weird. How's everybody else doing? Purple love to you all.


-- A lot of it is because his death is so senseless. If he had died of old age it would make sense. neutral
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Reply #4 posted 11/09/16 9:56am

sonshine

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LBrent said:

I've also gone several days at a time without crying, but last night I made the mistake of looking at, of all things, the P Tasting Menu from PP...and I sobbed uncontrollably for awhile thinking how he had enjoyed those foods but now...



I got so angry afterwards. Not for any reason that I can articulate, but really angry. Like I needed to punch sommething really hard. I didn't do it but that feeling was very strong until I fell asleep.



I feel better this morning.


This is about where I'm at. Better, but still some bad moments with a mixture of sadness and anger about the whole thing. I'm thinking this might be as good as it gets but at least its not consuming every waking moment like at first so that's a relief.
It's a hurtful place, the world, in and of itself. We don't need to add to it. We all need one another. ~ PRN
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Reply #5 posted 11/09/16 10:43am

morningsong

The only weird thing, is relying on time knowing Prince didn't believe in time, but knowing that only the passing of time is the only relief of dealing with something I had no choice in.

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Reply #6 posted 11/09/16 10:48am

cloveringold85

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They say that time is the best healer; in time, the pain will be less. We will always love Prince and miss him, dearly. He will always be with us; his music will go on forever.

"With love, honor, and respect for every living thing in the universe, separation ceases, and we all become one being, singing one song." - Prince Roger Nelson (1958-2016)
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Reply #7 posted 11/09/16 10:57am

NorthC

roxy831 said:

This is the first month since his death that I can go days without crying or feeling heavy-hearted about his passing. It feels weird, like I should never stop mourning him. I know I was tired of crying. I know I wanted to move forward, but now that I'm here, it feels weird. How's everybody else doing? Purple love to you all.


I know that feeling. I felt like that a few months after my wife died. I was getting my life back together again and almost felt guilty for not grieving anymore. But it's all part of the process. You'll be alright. hug
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Reply #8 posted 11/09/16 12:03pm

GrayDorian

I haven’t made as much progress as I had hoped, I suppose, though thanks for asking. At least I am aware of it, which I reckon is always a good starting point. Pretty pathetic on my part after over half a year, but I was having a silent cwy in bed on election night at thwee in the morning (not wanting to wake my better half…if I’d known Twump was winning, I’d probably have cwied harder).

I suspect that it’s going to continue to affect me like my Dad’s sudden illness and passing. On both occasions it feels like a piece of me has died, and I don’t seem to be blessed with any degree of ‘closure’ as such. I guess I will just have to continue to work to learn to live with the pain, grief and loss. In a strange kind of way I feel like I carry them both with me every day. I already know I will never stop missing either of them, even though I never even met Prince! Go figure. confuse


[Edited 11/9/16 12:35pm]

[Edited 11/11/16 10:16am]

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Reply #9 posted 11/09/16 12:10pm

bluegangsta

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The only thing that feels weird to me is this forum clogged up with the same fucking threads.

Why could this not go into another grief thread? Why are you so special in all this that you have to contribute to the plethora?

Always cry 4 love, never cry 4 pain.
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Reply #10 posted 11/09/16 12:16pm

MD431Madcat

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Im still deeply hurt!

its the nightmare gift that keeps on giving... sad

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Reply #11 posted 11/09/16 1:24pm

roxy831

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LBrent said:

I've also gone several days at a time without crying, but last night I made the mistake of looking at, of all things, the P Tasting Menu from PP...and I sobbed uncontrollably for awhile thinking how he had enjoyed those foods but now...

I got so angry afterwards. Not for any reason that I can articulate, but really angry. Like I needed to punch sommething really hard. I didn't do it but that feeling was very strong until I fell asleep.

I feel better this morning.

hug The ebb and flow of emotions will continue to surprise us. At least we are not alone in this.

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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Reply #12 posted 11/09/16 1:26pm

roxy831

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Poorlovelycomputer said:

Ok...I Ignored it as much as possible when it first happened. I occupied my mind with other things as to not really have to fully take it in.The man,the artist,and musician who played a major part in my life. The many hours spent in my bedroom imprinting the songs into my being.the years he created music impacted my whole life. Through his lyrics he knew he would be leaving here soon accepting his passing actually makes us look at our own lives

Yes, I do agree. It made me re-evaluate many things in my own life. Even reconcile with a couple things. We all are 'one' and don't even realize it until a piece of us is gone. Thank you for sharing.

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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Reply #13 posted 11/09/16 1:27pm

roxy831

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laurarichardson said:

roxy831 said:

This is the first month since his death that I can go days without crying or feeling heavy-hearted about his passing. It feels weird, like I should never stop mourning him. I know I was tired of crying. I know I wanted to move forward, but now that I'm here, it feels weird. How's everybody else doing? Purple love to you all.

-- A lot of it is because his death is so senseless. If he had died of old age it would make sense. neutral

Laura, that's true. And I believe that fact FUELED my 'anger stage' for a great amount of time during this season.

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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Reply #14 posted 11/09/16 1:29pm

roxy831

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morningsong said:

The only weird thing, is relying on time knowing Prince didn't believe in time, but knowing that only the passing of time is the only relief of dealing with something I had no choice in.

Deep hug

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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Reply #15 posted 11/09/16 1:29pm

roxy831

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NorthC said:

roxy831 said:

This is the first month since his death that I can go days without crying or feeling heavy-hearted about his passing. It feels weird, like I should never stop mourning him. I know I was tired of crying. I know I wanted to move forward, but now that I'm here, it feels weird. How's everybody else doing? Purple love to you all.

I know that feeling. I felt like that a few months after my wife died. I was getting my life back together again and almost felt guilty for not grieving anymore. But it's all part of the process. You'll be alright. hug

Thx NorthC biggrin

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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Reply #16 posted 11/09/16 1:31pm

roxy831

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MD431Madcat said:

Im still deeply hurt!

its the nightmare gift that keeps on giving... sad

Keep strong Madcat. We're here with you grouphug

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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Reply #17 posted 11/09/16 2:19pm

MD431Madcat

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cool

roxy831 said:

MD431Madcat said:

Im still deeply hurt!

its the nightmare gift that keeps on giving... sad

Keep strong Madcat. We're here with you grouphug

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Reply #18 posted 11/09/16 3:27pm

laurarichardso
n

bluegangsta said:

The only thing that feels weird to me is this forum clogged up with the same fucking threads.

Why could this not go into another grief thread? Why are you so special in all this that you have to contribute to the plethora?


--Do your self a favor and get off the board for a while because these types of conversation are going to continue for sometime.
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Reply #19 posted 11/09/16 7:19pm

roxy831

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laurarichardson said:

bluegangsta said:

The only thing that feels weird to me is this forum clogged up with the same fucking threads.

Why could this not go into another grief thread? Why are you so special in all this that you have to contribute to the plethora?

--Do your self a favor and get off the board for a while because these types of conversation are going to continue for sometime.

yeahthat

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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Reply #20 posted 11/09/16 8:03pm

Jon1967

Its not ez n it sux still
[Edited 11/10/16 7:09am]
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Reply #21 posted 11/10/16 5:05am

CAL3

laurarichardson said:

bluegangsta said:

The only thing that feels weird to me is this forum clogged up with the same fucking threads.

Why could this not go into another grief thread? Why are you so special in all this that you have to contribute to the plethora?

--Do your self a favor and get off the board for a while because these types of conversation are going to continue for sometime.

-- // -- / - // It's actually not nice to tell people what to do. It's an open forum, they expressed their thoughts.

.

//.--/%// Deal with it.

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Reply #22 posted 11/10/16 12:12pm

DiamondStarr

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roxy831 said:

This is the first month since his death that I can go days without crying or feeling heavy-hearted about his passing. It feels weird, like I should never stop mourning him. I know I was tired of crying. I know I wanted to move forward, but now that I'm here, it feels weird. How's everybody else doing? Purple love to you all.

It's still fresh and very difficult. Still tears, still sadness. But I'm working on it... sad

Sweet wind blew
Not a moment to soon.
I cry when I realized
That sweet wind was you.
(Tears go here)
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Reply #23 posted 11/10/16 12:29pm

bluegangsta

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CAL3 said:

laurarichardson said:

bluegangsta said: --Do your self a favor and get off the board for a while because these types of conversation are going to continue for sometime.

-- // -- / - // It's actually not nice to tell people what to do. It's an open forum, they expressed their thoughts.

.

//.--/%// Deal with it.

You say it's not nice to tell someone what to do, then proceed to demade that I 'deal wih it'.

This is the level of intelligence that's turning this forum away from what it once was.

Always cry 4 love, never cry 4 pain.
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Reply #24 posted 11/10/16 12:34pm

NorthC

What we're going to have to deal with is that this forum will never be back to what it once was. Ever again. Let's not make things worse by arguing amongst each other!
[Edited 11/10/16 12:35pm]
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Reply #25 posted 11/10/16 1:12pm

cloveringold85

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NorthC said:

What we're going to have to deal with is that this forum will never be back to what it once was. Ever again. Let's not make things worse by arguing amongst each other! [Edited 11/10/16 12:35pm]

.

What I don't understand is how some people will go out of their way just to be rude. I mean, if you see a thread topic you don't like, why click on it and then proceed to read the comments, then post a rude and condescending comment showing your distaste for the topic content?

.

There is no need to be nasty here. disbelief

"With love, honor, and respect for every living thing in the universe, separation ceases, and we all become one being, singing one song." - Prince Roger Nelson (1958-2016)
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Reply #26 posted 11/10/16 1:13pm

cloveringold85

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NorthC said:

What we're going to have to deal with is that this forum will never be back to what it once was. Ever again. Let's not make things worse by arguing amongst each other! [Edited 11/10/16 12:35pm]

.

Agree!! nod

"With love, honor, and respect for every living thing in the universe, separation ceases, and we all become one being, singing one song." - Prince Roger Nelson (1958-2016)
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Reply #27 posted 11/10/16 1:26pm

anangellooksdo
wn

I'm glad to see people healing a bit. I also have reached some acceptance some of the time. It does feel weird because the blow was so hard and deep and has been so long-lasting that it's become a part of me to be grieving.
Like NorthC said, there is some guilt for not feeling as horrible all the time as I did a few months ago. Yesterday morning I actually "said to Prince", "Don't worry...I'm not going to leave you." or something like that. I don't want to leave him out there alone.
Oh shite, I just started crying again.

But see this is where I have to do several things.

Number one, I gotta trust God. He's got Prince safe and protected and at peace and I think even bliss and pleasure.
And we're all gonna die.
Number two, I have to recognize when I'm getting addicted to my depression. Ego does that. It wants us unhappy and not free.
Third, I gotta remember that Prince had a very generous loving side to him and he would want us happy, not sad.

So it's okay to move on from the sadness to other feelings...good feelings.

I commend those of you who are letting yourselves actually feel the feelings. It's probably the one thing we humans try to run from.
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Reply #28 posted 11/10/16 2:36pm

morningsong

roxy831 said:

morningsong said:

The only weird thing, is relying on time knowing Prince didn't believe in time, but knowing that only the passing of time is the only relief of dealing with something I had no choice in.

Deep hug



It's just trying to fully understand the affect it had on me. There's a new normal to get use to. That's the accepting part.

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Reply #29 posted 11/10/16 3:30pm

roxy831

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DiamondStarr said:

roxy831 said:

This is the first month since his death that I can go days without crying or feeling heavy-hearted about his passing. It feels weird, like I should never stop mourning him. I know I was tired of crying. I know I wanted to move forward, but now that I'm here, it feels weird. How's everybody else doing? Purple love to you all.

It's still fresh and very difficult. Still tears, still sadness. But I'm working on it... sad

Be strong, DiamondStarr. We got eachother to lean on. pat

Welcome home class. We've come a long way. - RIP Prince
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