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Thread started 01/12/08 3:53pm

Haystack

The Prince Channel

Sunday's TV

7:00am - The Morning Papers

Mayte and Dr Fink scrutinize and debate today's big headlines, with political analysis from Cat Glover.

7:30am - eye Rock, Therefore A.M.

Breakfast TV show with Tamar and Jill Jones. Lively magazine and chat show, with phone-in quizzes throughout the morning, including the ever popular What's My Name? competition in which the public can win anything up to $319,000.

10:00am - Morning Movie: Daddy Pop

Heart-wrenching family drama starring Jerome Benton as the father of two children who, after a bitter divorce, acquires a rare eye disease which threatens that the slightest hint of stress could mean his eyes may pop out at any moment, rendering him blind and pretty much insuring that he will lose custody of his children. Powerfully moving soundtrack by Carmen Electra.

12:00pm - Lunchtime News

Read by Mavis Staples. Followed by the Weather Report with Sheila E.

12:30pm - Larry!

More controversial day-time chat with the ever-popular host. Today: My Wife's Lover Fucks Her Own Gerbils and So Your Daughter's A Ho? Mine's A Junkie!
Plus, homosexuals in the audience are condemned to hell.

1:30pm - Gold

Host T C Ellis calls the shots as four more contestants battle through GungeQuest, Who's Done The Shit?, 20 Questions About Your Family's Sex Life and Stab The Baby in order to win the coveted three chains of gold prize.

2:00pm - Dream Factory

The U.S. soap about the trials and tribulations of the Rodgers family continues.
This week, there's trouble in store for Chelsea as her pet fly decides to take a coast-to-coast tour of America leaving Chelsea all alone. Elsewhere, Judah finally breaks down and admits that the factory is having financial problems.

3:00pm - Pussy Control

New dramatisation of the well-loved E Nesbit novel about a lonely schoolgirl with a magic clitoris.

3:25pm - Alphabet St

Brought to you today by the number 69 and the letters F and U. Maceo The Grouch fights with Tommy Barbarella about a candy bar or something.

4:30pm - Wee March

More cartoon adventures with the Scottish Terrier, March. Today, our favourite canine gets into trouble when he accidentally switches off the ovens at the Wit U store, meaning that none of the customers are able to buy any hot Wit U's and have to buy them cold.

5:00pm - Prince and the Revolution

More cartoon fun as Prince and the Revolution are still stuck in 1888 London, trying to outwit that nasty villain Jack The Ripper. Will the power of music stop the fiend from cutting off prostitutes' tits?

6:00pm - Evening News

Read by Carmen Electra on a brass pole. Weather with Tony M.

6:30pm - Vacation 08

Travel show. This week, Prince gives us a whirlwind guide to Beirut, Tevin Campbell visits Narnia and Morris Day visits a Twin Cities nudist colony where track 4 from Prince's NEWS album is played constantly to illustrate that most nudists body-parts have headed South.

7:30pm - The Rainbow Children

First of two visits to this ever-popular soap.
Wendy and Lisa's relationship gets even more strained as lodger Mayte becomes increasingly infatuated with Lisa. Prince decides that now's the time for action and he must confess that it was him who burnt down the Zannalee night-club. It's crunch time for Damon Dickson as his amnesia makes him as forgetful as his presence in the NPG.

8:00pm - Incense and Candles

3 of 26: Cop thriller, starring Prince and Kirky J as Inspector Dave Incense and Lieutenant Cliff Candles.
The team are no nearer to uncovering the Arboretum killer and have to rely on psychic Candy Dulfer to give them the clues needed to capture their mysterious suspect. Guest starring an expertly made-up Sheena Easton as Wally Safford.

9:00pm - The Rainbow Children

Second visit of the night. Wendy finally comes to her senses and kicks Lisa out; but not before inviting Mayte IN.
From beyond the grave, Boni Boyer forgives Prince for burning down Zannalee via an endless, searing vocal. Damon Dickson is, erm, what was he again..?

9:30pm - We Bloody Love You, God

Presented this week from St. Paul's cathedral in London, UK.
Hosted by Sonny T.
Hymns sung tonight include; 'All Things Bright And Beautiful', 'The Lord Is My Shepherd', 'Jerusalem', 'Count The Days' and 'Erotic City'.

10:30pm - The Late Night Porno: 'Purple Moon'

Saucy larks starring Prince as sex-starved Hugh G. Rection.
A struggling musician with a lonely, dysfunctional home life, Hugh decides he's had enough and finds solace in both music and casual, hardcore sex.
Along the way, he beds Apollonia, Wendy AND Lisa, Jill Jones and Big Chick Huntsberry
This musical, porno movie boasts an award-winning* soundtrack including the tracks 'When Doves Suck It To The Root', 'Baby, I'm A Slut', 'I Would Suffer HOM Smothering 4 U' and the ever classic 'Purple Head'.

12:30pm-6.00am - Face Down

A number of Prince associated artists spend the night trying to urge you to go to sleep and stop watching the TV.















*Best Porno Score: Amsterdam FuckMovie Golden Testicles 2006.
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Reply #1 posted 01/12/08 4:01pm

ToraToraDreams

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falloff OMG, how long did it take you to make that?
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Reply #2 posted 01/12/08 4:15pm

lottielooloo19
68

falloff
amazing viewing! i was glued 2 the box...

perhaps they can slip in lolliPOP LIFE. sex tips 4 girls, presented by prince & rated by the the twinz, cool
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Reply #3 posted 01/12/08 4:17pm

gyro34

lottielooloo1968 said:

falloff
amazing viewing! i was glued 2 the box...

perhaps they can slip in lolliPOP LIFE. sex tips 4 girls, presented by prince & rated by the the twinz, cool


Oh, I would love that too. nod
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Reply #4 posted 01/12/08 4:34pm

HamsterHuey

Haystack said:

*Best Porno Score: Amsterdam FuckMovie Golden Testicles 2006.


Thank you.
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Reply #5 posted 01/12/08 5:12pm

Tame

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I'm gonna take a wild guess, that Haystack and Imago are the same person...If not, they ought to write together.
"The Lion Sleeps Tonight...
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Reply #6 posted 01/12/08 5:16pm

luv4u

Moderator

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moderator

Oh geez falloff
canada

Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture!
REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince
"I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben
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Reply #7 posted 01/12/08 5:28pm

BlackCandle

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Saturday Night was better... lol

How can I subscribe to this channel! cool
"Had to get off the boat so I could walk on water..."
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Reply #8 posted 01/12/08 6:25pm

Haystack

BlackCandle said:

Saturday Night was better... lol

How can I subscribe to this channel! cool


To be honest, I thought Saturday was a bit shit on the Prince Channel. The fourth season of 3121 is most definitely one season too many. I mean, how many times can Jack Uoff have such an action-packed 3,121 hours in one go?

And American Lolita has ran its course, surely? As soon as that contestant turned up who was disappointed that Prince only wanted to dance with her, I knew that she'd be the winner.

And the less said about the season finale of Desperate Jugheads, the better.
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