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Thread started 05/12/13 5:16am

Thibaut

she has a boyfriend HElp :D

Guys help me big grin

Anyway I met this girl in a bar once. She told me afte rlike 1 minute she had a boyfriend. I was like I don't care we can still talk. We talk for like a few hours and have some drinks and we're like exchanging phone numbers and stuff. My friend takes a picture and puts it on fb. The day after her boyfriend start stalking me on fb telling me I shoud leave her alone and she's not allowed to talk to me anymore. Like wth. Anyway at first she obeys sad but we keep bumping in to eachother. So every time we see eachother wa have fun and she complains how possessive he is.

One night we kiss and she decides to dump him. We date for like two weeks but the guy keeps stalking her and trying to convince her. So finally she decides to go back to him. But same thing happens. we keep bumping in to eachother and secretly texting. We kiss on two more occasions. After that she tells me we should stop meetinge achother cause she can't stop thinking about me and dreams about me and stuff.

We don't talk to eachother for like two weeks and now she contacted me saying she can't get me out of her head and wants to dump him again.

What do you guys think. What should I do?

And oh I should add her boyfriend is obsessive about her

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Reply #1 posted 05/12/13 5:36am

ZombieKitten

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What a mess! :dead:

I don't know how old you guys are (sound pretty young to me)

BUT

Let this girl know that she needs to end with the guy for realz before getting it on with you - unless of course that drama is also extra excitement for you.

She probably likes the drama - and sounds like she wants to have the cake and eat it too. It's fun now but a total drag in the long term when you're the boyfriend and she is transitioning over to someone new.
I'm the mistake you wanna make
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Reply #2 posted 05/12/13 5:55am

Thibaut

I'm 21, she's 18

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Reply #3 posted 05/12/13 6:03am

Fonkyman

Start wooing the boyfriend.

Buy him some flowers and start wearing dresses. Add him as a friend on FB and give him lots of love. It's not important if you're not gay, just go along with it. Have a tattoo of his name put on your thigh and post pictures of it all over the place. Print some up and stick em to lamposts near his home.

You could end up having to choose between the two of them. Follow your heart. You know what's best.

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Reply #4 posted 05/12/13 6:07am

TrevorAyer

yup she is just playing both of you .. if ur fine with sharing u can go along with her bs .. u can demand she break with the other guy but then u will be the "possessive asshole" she complains about to him when she cheats on you the same way .. enjoy the sex if u don't care if she is doing other guys .. i wouldn't get your hopes up that this girl is even remotely honest or sane .. she would not be in a bar chatting with dudes if she wanted a stable relationship with her current guy .. and she would not be going back and forth if she really liked you or the other guy that much ..

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Reply #5 posted 05/12/13 6:10am

unique

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kill the boyfriend. or if you can't commit to murder, tie him up in your mothers basement for a few years until he gets the picture and the girl forgets about him

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Reply #6 posted 05/12/13 6:15am

Thibaut

isn't it possible she just likes me but the her boyfriend is the easy and safe choice cause she knows him and what to expect. And it's not like she doesn't have feelings for him so she's just honest and needs some time to figure out what she wants? Or am I just too naive here

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Reply #7 posted 05/12/13 6:21am

Fonkyman


She's with someone.

She told you so and you both carried on like she was free. What if the fella disappears and you two get all loved up for a while. What's she gonna say to the next fella in a bar? "I'm with someone".

If you choose to follow Uniques' advice, I wouldn't do it in Cleveland.

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Reply #8 posted 05/12/13 6:32am

Thibaut

To be honest though. When a girl here in belgium says she has a boyfriend 90% of guys just walk away

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Reply #9 posted 05/12/13 6:34am

TrevorAyer

Thibaut said:

isn't it possible she just likes me but the her boyfriend is the easy and safe choice cause she knows him and what to expect. And it's not like she doesn't have feelings for him so she's just honest and needs some time to figure out what she wants? Or am I just too naive here

you are assuming she has 'feelings' .. this is your naivite .. any woman capable of "feeling" makes real choices to have healthy relationships .. this is a woman who uses "emotions" and manipulative notions of love and confusion to get what she wants .. she has you pitying her for fucking 2 guys at the same time and lying to both of them .. like the confusion is just too much for her .. typical ho manipulation technique to keep multiple lovers on the line ..

like i said .. if u don't mind her lying and fucking other dudes .. enjoy the ride .. just don't believe the hype .. its all bs .. everything coming from her mouth is bs

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Reply #10 posted 05/12/13 6:40am

Fonkyman

You'll have to go for the boyfriend. That way you'll have them both chasing you.

Nipple tassles are the way to go here. nod

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Reply #11 posted 05/12/13 7:00am

prittypriss

My concern is the possessiveness and obsessiveness of the boyfriend. Any guy that tells a girl who she can or cannot hang out with has the potential to be abusive. Please note, I said "Potential." There is also the potential of him hunting you down and kicking your ass. My first husband was the same way, every time I said "hi" to a guy in the store or when we were out that I knew from work or college, he wanted to know how I knew them and then would insist I had to be sleeping with the guy. I never once cheated on the guy, but as much as he accused me of it, I most definitely thought about doing so, because I was already being punished for doing so, being beat for doing so, and if I was already suffering the consequences of doing it, I might as well get the pleasure from actually doing it. But I never did. He controlled, however, who I could be friends with, even females. And he thought nothing of knocking me around to get his point across. I'd tread carefully with this one. It is very possible that she truly does like you, but as you said, the boyfriend is familiar, his possessiveness is familiar to her, and that familiarity can be a difficult habit to break.
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Reply #12 posted 05/12/13 7:12am

Thibaut

Thanks pretty priss I think your answer is very useful. I'm really sure he doesn't hit her though. But he is very obesessive and controlling. He doesn't want her to talk to other guys and he's already texted me pretending to be her and threatened to beat me up a few times. So he really has somse jealousy en possesiveness problems. Cause he was already like that before I was even trying to hit on her and I was cool with just being friends with her.

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Reply #13 posted 05/12/13 7:20am

Fonkyman


Not going for the tassles then? shrug

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Reply #14 posted 05/12/13 7:34am

TrevorAyer

any woman who hangs out in the meat market, bars, talking with men, getting their number, is going to make their man very uncomfortable ... any woman who does so is not respecting the boundaries of a healthy respectful relationship and is abusing her man .. most men would get pissed off in this situation .. it does not make them jealous and controlling .. these are the rules of a basic honest and respectful relation ship. a woman can have male friends, but those male friends should be around when the boyfriend is around .. not at some bar in the middle of the night alone without the boyfriend

women love to call men jealous controlling abusive .. its their way of getting sympathy for the fact that they are out destroying their relationship flirting with men in bars sans supposed real boyfriend

any woman would be jealous if their man was out getting numbers from women at a bar without them. so lets not go down that road of any guy who is some how instictively aware that their girlfriend is out flirting, kissing, hooking up with other guys .. is somehow a jealous abusive ass

she is cheating with the op .. she deserves any amount of scrutiny that comes with that .. obviously she is not serious enough about you or her old boyfriend to respect either of you enough to be monogomous .. she is a lying slut .. sorry but its true .. if that is what you are looking for than go for it .. but dont fool yourself into believing all this "confusion" and "controlling jealousy" crap

you want this guy to be fine with you fucking his girlfriend or he is suddenly an abuser if he is not fine with it .. wake up .. this is the crap that keeps jerry springer and his paternity tests in bizness ..

u are just being selfish .. you want to WIN this girl .. get yer dick wet .. you know she is a mess and should not be in a "relationship" with anybody and really just wants a lot of dick from a lot of different men .. you are one of the men she will use and drop when she changes her mind AGAIN ...

any woman who thinks she should be able to pick up dudes and not have her boyfriend be upset or jealous is a destructive abuser who does not deserve a good man to love her .. you either treat each other respect or stop wasting the other persons time

nobody says you cant have friends .. but picking up dudes in a bar, getting numbers, and smooching or fucking is not JUST friends

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Reply #15 posted 05/12/13 8:02am

tinaz

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TrevorAyer said:

any woman who hangs out in the meat market, bars, talking with men, getting their number, is going to make their man very uncomfortable ... any woman who does so is not respecting the boundaries of a healthy respectful relationship and is abusing her man .. most men would get pissed off in this situation .. it does not make them jealous and controlling .. these are the rules of a basic honest and respectful relation ship. a woman can have male friends, but those male friends should be around when the boyfriend is around .. not at some bar in the middle of the night alone without the boyfriend

women love to call men jealous controlling abusive .. its their way of getting sympathy for the fact that they are out destroying their relationship flirting with men in bars sans supposed real boyfriend

any woman would be jealous if their man was out getting numbers from women at a bar without them. so lets not go down that road of any guy who is some how instictively aware that their girlfriend is out flirting, kissing, hooking up with other guys .. is somehow a jealous abusive ass

she is cheating with the op .. she deserves any amount of scrutiny that comes with that .. obviously she is not serious enough about you or her old boyfriend to respect either of you enough to be monogomous .. she is a lying slut .. sorry but its true .. if that is what you are looking for than go for it .. but dont fool yourself into believing all this "confusion" and "controlling jealousy" crap

you want this guy to be fine with you fucking his girlfriend or he is suddenly an abuser if he is not fine with it .. wake up .. this is the crap that keeps jerry springer and his paternity tests in bizness ..

u are just being selfish .. you want to WIN this girl .. get yer dick wet .. you know she is a mess and should not be in a "relationship" with anybody and really just wants a lot of dick from a lot of different men .. you are one of the men she will use and drop when she changes her mind AGAIN ...

any woman who thinks she should be able to pick up dudes and not have her boyfriend be upset or jealous is a destructive abuser who does not deserve a good man to love her .. you either treat each other respect or stop wasting the other persons time

nobody says you cant have friends .. but picking up dudes in a bar, getting numbers, and smooching or fucking is not JUST friends




yeahthat !!!!

~~~~~ Oh that voice...incredible....there should be a musical instrument called George Michael... ~~~~~
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Reply #16 posted 05/12/13 10:28am

lazycrockett

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3 way.

The Most Important Thing In Life Is Sincerity....Once You Can Fake That, You Can Fake Anything.
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Reply #17 posted 05/12/13 11:22am

Visionnaire

Menage a trois.

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Reply #18 posted 05/12/13 11:25am

luv4u

Moderator

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moderator

Forget her. Waste.of.your.time.

canada

Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture!
REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince
"I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben
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Reply #19 posted 05/12/13 4:45pm

PurpleJedi

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Too many fish in the sea to be messing with one that's already hooked.

By St. Boogar and all the saints at the backside door of Purgatory!
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Reply #20 posted 05/12/13 7:53pm

babynoz

Luckily this is Belgium because this is the kind of stuff that gun happy nut cases in the US will shoot somebody over. In any case I'm not seeing how this is worth the drama.

Prince, in you I found a kindred spirit...Rest In Paradise.
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Reply #21 posted 05/12/13 8:21pm

MoBetterBliss

does she have a hot sister?

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Reply #22 posted 05/13/13 8:32am

Tremolina

Thibaut said:


What do you guys think. What should I do?

And oh I should add her boyfriend is obsessive about her



Fuck her, then dump her and show her boyfriend the video on facebook.

Or simply get with a girl without that drama.

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Reply #23 posted 05/13/13 11:36am

Shyra

ZombieKitten said:

What a mess! dead I don't know how old you guys are (sound pretty young to me) BUT Let this girl know that she needs to end with the guy for realz before getting it on with you - unless of course that drama is also extra excitement for you. She probably likes the drama - and sounds like she wants to have the cake and eat it too. It's fun now but a total drag in the long term when you're the boyfriend and she is transitioning over to someone new.

My first impression: How old are these people? My deduction: Young. very young. lol

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Reply #24 posted 05/13/13 1:39pm

Ace

Thibaut said:

Guys help me big grin

Anyway I met this girl in a bar once. She told me afte rlike 1 minute she had a boyfriend. I was like I don't care we can still talk. We talk for like a few hours and have some drinks and we're like exchanging phone numbers and stuff. My friend takes a picture and puts it on fb. The day after her boyfriend start stalking me on fb telling me I shoud leave her alone and she's not allowed to talk to me anymore. Like wth. Anyway at first she obeys sad but we keep bumping in to eachother. So every time we see eachother wa have fun and she complains how possessive he is.

One night we kiss and she decides to dump him. We date for like two weeks but the guy keeps stalking her and trying to convince her. So finally she decides to go back to him. But same thing happens. we keep bumping in to eachother and secretly texting. We kiss on two more occasions. After that she tells me we should stop meetinge achother cause she can't stop thinking about me and dreams about me and stuff.

We don't talk to eachother for like two weeks and now she contacted me saying she can't get me out of her head and wants to dump him again.

What do you guys think. What should I do?

And oh I should add her boyfriend is obsessive about her


Head for zee hills! shake

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Reply #25 posted 05/13/13 1:53pm

Graycap23

Thibaut said:

Guys help me big grin

Anyway I met this girl in a bar once. She told me afte rlike 1 minute she had a boyfriend. I was like I don't care we can still talk. We talk for like a few hours and have some drinks and we're like exchanging phone numbers and stuff. My friend takes a picture and puts it on fb. The day after her boyfriend start stalking me on fb telling me I shoud leave her alone and she's not allowed to talk to me anymore. Like wth. Anyway at first she obeys sad but we keep bumping in to eachother. So every time we see eachother wa have fun and she complains how possessive he is.

One night we kiss and she decides to dump him. We date for like two weeks but the guy keeps stalking her and trying to convince her. So finally she decides to go back to him. But same thing happens. we keep bumping in to eachother and secretly texting. We kiss on two more occasions. After that she tells me we should stop meetinge achother cause she can't stop thinking about me and dreams about me and stuff.

We don't talk to eachother for like two weeks and now she contacted me saying she can't get me out of her head and wants to dump him again.

What do you guys think. What should I do?

And oh I should add her boyfriend is obsessive about her

R.U.N.

Drama waiting 2 happen.

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Reply #26 posted 05/13/13 2:01pm

Ace

Graycap23 said:

Thibaut said:

Guys help me big grin

Anyway I met this girl in a bar once. She told me afte rlike 1 minute she had a boyfriend. I was like I don't care we can still talk. We talk for like a few hours and have some drinks and we're like exchanging phone numbers and stuff. My friend takes a picture and puts it on fb. The day after her boyfriend start stalking me on fb telling me I shoud leave her alone and she's not allowed to talk to me anymore. Like wth. Anyway at first she obeys sad but we keep bumping in to eachother. So every time we see eachother wa have fun and she complains how possessive he is.

One night we kiss and she decides to dump him. We date for like two weeks but the guy keeps stalking her and trying to convince her. So finally she decides to go back to him. But same thing happens. we keep bumping in to eachother and secretly texting. We kiss on two more occasions. After that she tells me we should stop meetinge achother cause she can't stop thinking about me and dreams about me and stuff.

We don't talk to eachother for like two weeks and now she contacted me saying she can't get me out of her head and wants to dump him again.

What do you guys think. What should I do?

And oh I should add her boyfriend is obsessive about her

R.U.N.

Drama waiting 2 happen.


nod

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Reply #27 posted 05/13/13 2:45pm

dJJ

She should not get you involved in her bad relationship.


She has an obsessive, manipulative, jalous boyfriend.

However, she has the choice to leave him.


She doesn't. She stays with him, whilst she can cut off all contact with him.



She allows him to manipulate her and/or and dictate her life.


That is HER CHOICE. NOT YOUR RESPONSEBILITY.



Allow her to live and learn. She has to make her own decisions and take responsebility for her own life.


Just like you.


You and her boyfriend should stop pressuring her.

She clearly needs a break from both of you.

She would be so much better off if she would just focus on making herself happy.


In stead of trying to keep boyfriend and you happy.


She is not responsible for the two of you. She should focus on herself and not allow boys to ruin her well being.


And I hope that you raise your standard.

Only involve yourself with somebody who makes you happy.
Avoid those who only have drama to offer.


A girl who cheats and doesn't take responsebility for her own life, will not make you happy.
She will add a lot of drama and troubles to your life.

If she leaves her boyfriend and starts a relationship with you, she probably makes you responsible for her life. Consequently, she will blame you for everything what bothers her or makes her feel uncomfortable in her life.

Stay out of manipulative games and create a positive life.
Avoid this kind of drama.



And give her a change to learn from live. Allow her to deal with the consequences of her own choices. Don't falsely boost your own ego by pretenting to be her super hero.













[Edited 5/13/13 15:40pm]

99% of my posts are ironic. Maybe this post sides with the other 1%.
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