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One winter night, Dr. Melissa Barton was the attending physician in the emergency department of the Detroit Medical Center. Making her rounds, she picked up a chart for a new patient and read the woman's chief complaint: "eye in the vagina."

The patient told Barton she had been expecting a fight with some neighbors outside her house. Wearing only a sweatshirt and spandex pants, she needed somewhere to stow her prosthetic eye for safe-keeping.

"Those things are pretty expensive and hard to replace," Barton said. "So that's where it went, along with her driver's license."

Unfortunately, it got stuck.

Dr. Gary Vilke, a professor of clinical emergency medicine at the University of California San Diego Medical Center, saw a patient who had four Barbie doll heads stuck in his rectum.

"When you looked at his x-ray, they were looking at you, like a totem pole," Vilke said.

to infinity and beyond?

Now I do have to ask, is the button that expanse his "wings" located close enough to the helmet area where once inserted a finger can press that?

NDRU said:

to infinity and beyond?

Buzz: Terrain seems a bit unstable. No readout yet if the air is breathable. And there seems to be no sign of intelligent life anywhere.

Maybe Buzz thought he was walking into the backdoor of the Vagina Tent.

NDRU said:

to infinity and beyond?

to infinity and behind!

Maybe he's lookin' for Woody

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Buzz Lightyear stinks.

HotGritz said:

Buzz Lightyear stinks.

He sure will after being pulled out an ass

Because you can't get a woody otherwise!

the more I think about it, I'm pretty sure there is a star trek reference somewhere in this thread.

"Beam me up, waaay up"

XxAxX said:

"Beam me up, waaay up"

And there it is!!!!

this whole thing is such a rectacular story! i bet the ER docs must be about prostated with laughter by now

Did anyone ever think that's an xray of Andy?? He really LOVED his toys!!

I wonder if he intentionally shoved it up his ass or just fell on it really hard! Hey,,,it could happen.

“Million to one shot, doc. Million to one.”

maybe santa got lost and mistook dude's 'chimney' for his point of entry

'here's your toy, dude, enjoy'

[Edited 12/14/11 17:02pm]

Maybe dude was constipated and needed some digging out. Buzz Lightyear is quite familiar with black holes being an astronaut and all.

"i'm not sure what happened, doc. one moment i was playing spaceship with buzz like i always do when mom's making cookies for the church sale, and the next thing i knew buzz just slipped up my space time continuum and got stuck in there"

The first sentence.

There's a video on the net where a guy sits on a food preservative jar made of glass and it bursts inside his a** hole !

He's pulling shards of glass out of his rectum and blood is pouring everwhere.

I was like damn dude, why'd you have to use glass ?

[Edited 12/15/11 0:07am]

JoeyC said:

There's a video on the net where a guy sits on a glass food preservative jar and it bursts..........inside his a** hole !

He's pulling shards of glass out of his rectum and blood is pouring everwhere.

I was like damn dude, why'd you have to use glass ?

[Edited 12/14/11 18:29pm]

LE OMG!! 1 guy 1 jar!!

lazycrockett said:

Now I do have to ask, is the button that expanse his "wings" located close enough to the helmet area where once inserted a finger can press that?

The buttons are located on his chest. I know this because my nephew was really into Toy Story,and all those toys. What I want to know is if that is a full size Buzz Lightyear or one of the mini ones.

ScarletScandal said:

JoeyC said:

There's a video on the net where a guy sits on a glass food preservative jar and it bursts..........inside his a** hole !

He's pulling shards of glass out of his rectum and blood is pouring everwhere.

I was like damn dude, why'd you have to use glass ?

[Edited 12/14/11 18:29pm]

LE OMG!! 1 guy 1 jar!!

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG I saw that video and was SCARRED FOR LIFEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I couldnt even watch the whole thing and im NOT a squemish person... but the sounds and the pouring of blood...

tinaz said:

ScarletScandal said:

LE OMG!! 1 guy 1 jar!!

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG I saw that video and was SCARRED FOR LIFEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I couldnt even watch the whole thing and im NOT a squemish person... but the sounds and the pouring of blood...

I could'nt even watch it.