I had a falling out about 2 months ago with a person I considered to be my best friend of 7 years. Normally, after a disagreement, I would ALWAYS be the first to initiate a conversation even if I felt I was only a little bit wrong. This time, he was 100% to blame for the disagreement. Yet, he has failed to offer any apologies or initiate any conversation about what happened. It's clear he has moved on and that the friendship didn't mean as much to him as it did to me. I've come to accept a lot of things about him that I knew all along but refused to see up until recently.

However, I'm still having a problem moving on. I'm still experiencing so many feelings: betrayal, angry, hurt, sadness, pain, disappointment. We are talking 7 years of what I perceived to be a close friendship to a guy who I trusted more than anyone in the world! To make a bad situation worse, it's even more difficult for me to move on because this is someone I work with. He sits only a few feet away from me and I have to see and hear him 5 days a week!!!

At this point, I have no hope for any kind of reconciliation. Being that I found out what kind of person he really is, I'm not even really interested in trying to renew the friendship. I know the pain and anger will subside eventually but it just seems like it's taking too frickin' long! Has anyone else had to deal with being betrayed and losing someone who they thought was their best friend? How did you handle it? Do you ever really and truly fully heal???

Fully heal? Yes and No. Be thankful you found out now. Instead of being your best friend-maybe he could just be a work friend. Making him an enemy wont help you.

Your probably more upset with yourself for allowing a seemingly one-sided relationship to develop (by your description). Just chalk it up to lesson learned.

Also, you would never treat your (now x) friend they way he treated you? So, why is it okay for him to treat you that way? But that is the past, now you know better.

Friendship is earned and not a given.

Amigo Ill read this tomorrow when Im back online. hope youre ok gorgeous

my best friend killed himself 25 years ago, eye think of him everyday & miss him so much! if he was alive 2day eye no he would b a great person,writing this is painful so sign off now u take care.

Thanks guys for the great advise. All of it is common sense but sometimes you just need to hear someone else say it before you're able to get up off your butt, stop feeling sorry for yourself and move on. Each day is getting a little better. I'm sure I'll come out of this ordeal a stronger and much wiser person.

Another thing that's helping me heal is my music. Just listening to some really great music everyday to take my mind off of him and listening to lyrics that are actually helping me to understand and deal with the situation has also been a big help.

This happened to me years ago. A close friend accused me - wrongly - of outing her. (Yes, that kind of outing.)

We didn't speak for a few months, then saw each other out and about, and decided we should get together for a drink. I was prepared to let her (again, completely erroneous and unfair) accusation slide and say "bygones" to the whole thing. But she accused me again when we got together. I slammed my drink, put some money on the bar and walked out. We haven't spoken since.

it's not easy, i still feel hurt by losing my best friend. and it's been over 2 years already. it does get easier with time though. but i guess the worst part for me is, right now i don't have a friendship that is as close as the one i had with her.

Its going to take longer than a minute. l don't think it ever completely goes away but you will be fine

I think it is almost impossible to fall out with a really really good longterm friend so maybe they errr

never were a 'best friend'

endymion said:

I think it is almost impossible to fall out with a really really good longterm friend so maybe they errr

never were a 'best friend'

co-signing this sentiment....

paintedlady said:

endymion said:

I think it is almost impossible to fall out with a really really good longterm friend so maybe they errr

never were a 'best friend'

co-signing this sentiment....

Yeah, I know. In being completely honest with myself, the friendship was mostly one-sided, with me putting way more effort and sacrifice in it than he did. A big part of it was me being lonely, having really low self-esteem and not really having anyone I could put a lot of trust in. He saw that and I allowed him to take advantage of me. Again, I have learned a huge lesson from it all.

kitbradley said:

paintedlady said:

co-signing this sentiment....

Yeah, I know. In being completely honest with myself, the friendship was mostly one-sided, with me putting way more effort and sacrifice in it than he did. A big part of it was me being lonely, having really low self-esteem and not really having anyone I could put a lot of trust in. He saw that and I allowed him to take advantage of me. Again, I have learned a huge lesson from it all.

Been there...

now that you are starting to really know yourself.... you will make better friends, if he comes back in your life, he will appreciate you more since you raised your standard in "friend", or he'll learn to the hard way.

Things are gonna be better in the long run once your get over this bump on the road. Its Ok to want exactly what you derserve. You deserve real friends that appreciate you.

At least you were a friend even if they weren't your 'friend'.

I had something similar happen to me.

It sucks, but you can either move on or dwell on the past forever.

It does make me weary about meeting new people seeing how a 10 year aquaintance disentegrated right before my eyes.