To any romantic, which I believe that I am, this post may appear a little negative. I'm sure this is a subject that has crossed your mind in your relationships.
Let's talk about the difference between them both. Although love contains lusting your lover, I'm not so convinced the opposite is true...love accepting lust for others as a positive thing.
I woke up at 3am last night to jot down a quatrain that was floating around inside of me based on this subject that explains my personal feelings, it was this:

Cold kindled on passion's stove
Admiring her design
Fires burn inside of love
When your mind is eyeing mine.~T

Although a sensitive subject...I was wondering how music, Prince specifically makes you feel about this topic. Let's take the song "3121," as an example, and the lyric, "Look over there, there's another turn on." or even "Here I Come," from Bria's "Elixer." which is a song that is basically a lover's game between two people. To listen to, "Here I come," with it's lyrics is to accept it's intention as being a stimulant for a man, a woman, singles, or couples. Prince having a zillion faithful oriented love songs goes without mentioning...that of course is true, especially with, "Friendloversistermotherwife, " and "Savior," as beautiful examples.

My question is to you personally is, "How deeply does love welcome lusting other people? And does some music condone this behavior in the mind's of men and women?"

What lyric's would you use as an example to support your opinion?

Poor lonely computer
It's time someone programmed U
It's time U learned love and lust
They both have 4 letters
But they're entirely different words

What's a woman 2 do
Across the street wait the man
She's promised 2
In her presence is another
With eyes of violet blue

This is how it's gonna be
If U want 2 be with me
Ain't no room 4 disagreeing
1+1+1 is 3

Take 4 granted the feeling is mutual
We're computers 2, Computer Blue

i wanna reply on this cuz i dig where i think u'r @ (if that makes sense) i've jus recently revolved from a very lovelustful relationship that id share but i'd need some clarity of what u'r askin'

I will think about it and will report back later

Don't tell me we have conflicting emotions
It's written all over your face
Come my love, cover my tower
Ecstasy is ours -Desire

I think between Love - Lust there is desire, enfatuation, appreciation

I can look at a beautiful woman and not lust after her, I can appreciate her looks, there are people I consider to be beautiful but also not my type, but if I got to know them and their soul was just as beautiful I could desire or lust and love

I think it's possible 2 fall in love with someone when lust preceeds it.
I have, but I think love may have to be a part of it at the beginning to
not Eros(greek), but Philadephia(greek) love that is a general care and respect for your fellow human, some people have sex with people and it's really selfish, they don't care for the safety or wellfare of that person. You are honest with the person upfront, don't lead them on, don't take advantage of them. I don't know if I'm explaining myself correctly....

When U would hold me
Circles my heart danced
U never told me
That our love, it had no chance River Run Dry

If my bodily functions operate
This way when U just call my name
I'd hate 2 see when we are finally
Playing that nasty love game -Noon Rendezvous

Ok I'll try this, I think a man who is responsible about using a condom is not only thinking about themselves but the other person: he doesn't want the other to get pregnant, possible get a disease(he could be clean and healthy, but just that fact that nothing in life is always sure), doesn't want the other to be bothered/worried after the act, ... I believe that is a common love for your fellow man and woman

U don't have 2 send me flowers like U used 2 do
U don't have 2 buy me candy, I'll still be your fool
All I ask is 4 a little decency and class
Next time wipe the lipstick off your collar -Next Time Wipe the Lipstick

The screams of passion
Back and forth the raging seas of lust, I want U madly
Can't U tell, can't U tell, can't U tell, can't U tell?

...there is NO room 4 lust in my L-I-F-E anymore!!..
.
...L-O-V-E is WATCHFUL..and sleeping slumbereth not..
..though weary..it is not tired...though pressed..it is not straitened...though alarmed..it is not confounded...BUT AS A LIVELY FLAME AND BURING TORCH..it forces its way upwards..and securely PASSES through all..
...4 it is a LOUD cry in the ears of God...
..the mere ardent affection of the S-O-U-L..
...where it saith.."My God..my L-O-V-E..thou art all mine..and i am all thine"..
.
..God is L-O-V-E..but God can also be a tyrant.....4 our good..
.
..when we go after things that can only bring insecurity and ugliness(example lust)..it is out of His great L-O-V-E that theLord may HIT US HARD..
...on occasion He is forced 2 take up the "holy hammer"
..it goes against His nature 4 the Lord 2 hurt us..but oftenthere is no other way he can draw our attention...
...if He tries 2 tap out shoulders..we pay no heed...if he says from within.."HEY YOU!"..we plug our ears in a frenzy of activity...
..BUT ONE GOOD..HARD BLOW.....AND WE LISTEN!!!..
.
....2 put it very simply...the purpose of the pain we undergo in L-I-F-E with lust...is 2 help us go beyond pain....and find L-O-V-E..
..mzsexybaby

Who left the GD door open today?

JustErin said:

"Lust" is when you wanna play Hide-the-Salam (or Grind-the-Sterns); the way most people define "love" is when you wanna hide-the-salam/grind-the-sterns, but also don't completely want to murder the other person when you're not using them to get your rocks off.

To answer your question, to anyone who thinks their sig-oth doesn't fantasize about boning other meat, I say, "'Deluded' ain't just a river in Egypt."

Are there songs that paint these fantasies in a "sometimes-boning-someone-else-is-just-beyond-your-control-because-you-have-some-kind-of-cosmic-connection" manner? DUR!

P.S. I would say that Prince's big-upping of Amy Winehouse's "Love is a Losing Game" is a good indication of his feelings on "love" in the wake of his second failed marriage.

HonestMan13 said:

Cool, thanx.

way2funky1 said:

The whole nine yards of lust in general I suppose. Where does the outside flirtations come in to take away from a love relationship. When does something so typically common in some people's eyes become a dangerous thing to "flirt," with.

It appears that although men and woman can differ on their feelings, sometimes both agree that outside stimulation is a turn on. I believe that can be true when you are stupid, not when you are respecting someone.

I believe that we have to guard our minds and hearts from this kind of dust on the spirit.

From bachelor parties to innocent flirting can be painting an exit door...a place where trust is not being earned, it's being toyed with.

OldFriends4Sale said:

Very kind and thoughtful, I definitely believe that lust exists between two lover's and could come later in a friendship. When you have all of those elements, (Friendship, love, lust) with someone, it's time to call the preacher. After that initial thrill subsides slightly, it is time to feed the relationship, but not with outside stimulation. Some men beg their wives to have threesomes for their benefit and not hers, in other cases, she's willing also. That is going deeper than needed, it can be excessive dreaming of others that leads one person to leave the love. (Either the one that wants to pursue a fantasy, or the person that is too insecure to deal with their mates...turning away.)

mzkqueen03 said:

I agree with you, I am strict in this way. I have room for forgiveness for my lover always, but to tolerate his lust was outside of our lust for eachother couldn't go very far into forever happily.

Ace said:

The Bible says we have to take guard for our spirits, and in love we should guard both spirits as they are one and that is the golden rule...If a moment of thought steps in innocently from natural human animal attraction you can take that seed of thought and not allow it to grow when you have been given a blessing of true love. I believe if it is true love, it won't be that difficult to tame wild thoughts because those places exist between lover's.

If two eyes have to look at eachother as he is sinking into her, it ought to be whole hearted, not broken by loose other's that have brought on some kind of curiosity.
[Edited 8/29/09 17:55pm]

How can you make love like the first woman and man and believe that Adam or Eve gave an inkling of thought to whether or not GOD was gonna give them other sex partners? I am certain EVE would start singing, "FURY," if the song between them wasn't, "The Greatest Romance that's ever been sold."

Would Adam want Eve thinking about some gorgeous blue rainbow guy when He is wearing the plants in the family? I'm just being silly...but U know what I mean...Devotion is the key to a divine love.

Tame said:

The Bible...


"True love".

Tame said:

"Divine love".

Man, the dude that came up with this shit must be pissing himself right now.

Ace said:

For real.

Tame said:

'Tame wild thoughts'?

Ok, I'm all for being faithful and devoted in a relationship, and constantly lusting after people other than your partner is definitely a bad thing imho, but that line above speaks to me far too much about forcing yourself to change, to bend to something that may even be unnatural and unhelpful. It's all too try-hard for my liking. I let my thoughts, lustful or otherwise, roam where they will. If I still love my wife and want to have sex with her and have no desire to cheat then I'll still be around and it's all still good. I obviously still love her the way I thought I did. I just thought about choking Erin and that's fine.

Fauxie said:

It's

"Okay Marsha, I sincerely want to fuck the taste out of your mouth..."

versus

"If I ever held a hand, it was only cuz' i never held your hand..."



versus

Girl, shut up.

Look behind the mirror.
To see reality amidst the blooming roses.
in this small room, pleasure oozes from the walls.
as people file from here to fro..voices down the halls.
saying, "gee what a wonderful time!, we had!"

to alter the sordid miracle would be a crime.
does this poem really make sense?

Does this Usher song fit your definition of "lusting other people"?:

Usher: You Make Me Wanna

You make me wanna leave the one Im with
Start a new relationshipwith you
This is what you do
Think about her and the things that come along with
You make me
You make me wanna leave the one Im with
Start a new realtionship with you
This is what you do
Think about her and the things that come along with
You make me
You make me

Before anything came between us
You were like my bestfriend
The one I used to run to when me and my
Girl was having problems
You used to say it would be okay
Suggest little nice things I should do
And when I come home at night and lay my head down
Sll I seem to think about is you
And how you make me wanna
[Edited 8/30/09 2:25am]

Tame said:

It seems some thought has been given in starting this thread. Many things have been said, yes. Yet the question still remains, "How deeply does love welcome lusting other people? And does some music condone this behavior in the mind's of men and women?" Ok, first of all when 2 r N Love, how could any man/woman lust "other people" and make it known to others? Matters not the defining of lust, when it comes to lusting after "any other", other than than The One...is it Love or just being Satisfied with the string and array of thoughts self pleasuring or being pleasured by other men/women? Contrary to popular belief, think on a certain subjet too long and we may be moved to action, hmmm. My twocents is, if you really Love someone the foundation should be grounded firm enough to have room for tilling its soil. No ENTER pass or WELCOME mat for jerks, matters not how well they Dance 4 Me.

Fauxie said:

I understand. That is why this is a discussion where based on our current or past relationships we have gathered our feelings.

For example, if a man and woman's forheads played video's of their thoughts all of the time, how would that affect their bedroom scenes as they are looking in eachother's eyes? I honestly don't believe that a man would want his woman thinking elsewhere either. With that concept, I can see how insecure females blow things out of proportion by trying to challenge the man by saying..."What if I thought as you do....what if I lived like U do?....what if I was carrying on with a guy at work just short of the actual act of being with him?

It is better for the woman to let her man's think as he pleases without trying to confine his mind with guilty walls, but equally so, she has the freedom to state clearly that she doesn't like it.

At this point in a lover's conversation they can let one or the other turn away from devotion or they both turn away and create a space between them. That space will expand and contract over time, or it will continually expand to their love's demise.

sweething said:

I guess with this song, a man is relying on a friendship more than the friendship he would be having with his partner if he was more dedicated to creating a relationship on his own.

A man that splits his attention is going to end up loving two women, And be the same guy that cries over losing either of them, So he drags his mind through the thought of marrying one, and by that time the girl that really loved him and wanted his time to develop their intimacy is insecure, because he didn't love her by a long shot.
[Edited 8/30/09 7:01am]

HonestMan13 said:

Exactly....A marriage has both of these, and a lustful relationship is only one sided.

Billmenever said:

I agree whole heartedly Billmenever...It's a...

Hard Truth

On diamonds
We must stand
Together
Hand in hand
Without rust
And quick sand
For our love
Should be grand.~T

JustErin said: