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The Ballad Of McCaully Culkin [or, Jackson does Prince cover album] 01. KinderActive
02. One Of Your Crayons 03. Sex In The Summer Camp 04. The Lubricated Pre-Teen 05. Hide The Salami 06. Sexual Career-Suicide 07. The Ballad Of McCaully Culkin 08. Age Don't Matter 2Nite 09. The [fun-fare] Ride 10. Something In The Flintstone Vitamins [Does Not Compute] 11. The Pubescent Ones 12. Sexy Toddler 13. The Cartoons In The Morning Papers Here's an excerpt fro the Lyrics to song # 7, a cover of Dorothy Parker, with alternate lyrics: The Ballad Of McCaully Culkin McCaully was a small boy, up in Neverland he slept in my bed Dishwater blond, small and fine, I liked to stroke his hips Well, earlier, I'd been talkin' shit in my interviews talking bout women's ass I needed someone with a slender build at last, McCaully came fast. I ordered: Yeah, lemme see you on all four's I feel kinda horny McCaully laughed, he said "sounds kinda sick and weird to me" "Do you wanna lick my ass?" I said cool, but I'm taking my clothes off cause I'm kind of in the mood for some he said "sounds like a bad joke to me" "mind if I just watch the Squishy bears?" "Oho, my fav scene, he said, and it was Tipsy singing 'Help me, I want my mommy!' The phone rang and he said "That's Shelldon callin He wants a piece of you" Right then and there I knew it was through McCaully was no longer in pre-school. I don't regret, the pay off cause it sho nuff bought me goodtimes with the children I adopted As well, as pretending to be white through afflictions I adopted with my purse McCaully stroked my buldge I got much wetter so I went back to the nursery room Tell us what you did - Lemme tell you what I did I took another pre-teen home took his pants off Lizzy Tailor screamed "I should have told you sooner After what happened to 'Caully Culkin.." McCaully Culkin, Caully Culkin, Caully Culkin Plea-he-he-ease, McCaully Culkin, Caully Culkin, Caully Culkin [come back to me , go down on your knees...] Well... McCaully Culkin, Caully Culkin, So, have you heard of any other re-recorded versions? [This message was edited Fri Nov 21 6:35:05 PST 2003 by IstenSzek] and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
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You sick funny bastard!!! | |
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dodger said: You sick funny bastard!!!
Couldn't have said it better! (L) | |
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You rule !! Futuristic Fantasy | |
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I'm still trying to come up with alternate lyrics for the rest of the song though. and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
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IstenSzek said: I'm still trying to come up with alternate lyrics for the rest of the song though. We have trust in you to come up with sumthin' | |
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Picked up my paper 2day
Give u 1 one guess what they say Wacko got caught in the play Kinderactive Another man in need of some ass Another child whose parents love cash A superstar in need of some press Kinderactive Ain't that a child? CHORUS: I'll tell u what 2 do and U'll do it Illegal? What the fuck let's get 2 it Up and down, around and all through it Baby baby boy let's do it Kinderactive Everything U got is so tight (Kinderactive) Just relax your muscles and it won't be a plight (Kinderactive) You can sleep in my bed tonite Kinderactive Ahh, hey there boy, I'll do ya till you're bored Me and your parents will settle out of court I'll put a security guard outside the door Kinderactive Oh, ain't that a boy? CHORUS (As long as we get 2 it, 2 it, 2 it) Yeah, yeah Check out this mole on my dick (Kinderactive, kinderactive) They'll use it against me to identify my prick I'll use KY and make it nice and slick (Kinderactive) Ain't that a boy? Ow! Kinderactive Oh, oh One more, one more [This message was edited Fri Nov 21 6:13:24 PST 2003 by MartyMcFly] [This message was edited Fri Nov 21 6:14:42 PST 2003 by MartyMcFly] | |
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MartyMcFly said: Another child whose parents love cash
Hehehe, you SO evil. | |
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Mike realised that the boy was new to love
Naive in every way Every paedophile's fantasy he was So why would Jacko wait? If he poured his cum into a glass And offered it like wine Aaaawww, nevermind... | |
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IstenSzek said: The Ballad Of McCaully Culkin I ordered: Yeah, lemme see you on all four's I feel kinda horny McCaully laughed, he said "sounds kinda sick and weird to me" "Do you wanna lick my ass?" omg Nsync! | |
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ok, I've written the last few verses as well and edited the
original message. enjoy and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
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MartyMcFly said: Mike realised that the boy was new to love
Naive in every way Every paedophile's fantasy he was So why would Jacko wait? If he poured his cum into a glass And offered it like wine Aaaawww, nevermind... You got to finish that one!! | |
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MartyMcFly said: Picked up my paper 2day
Give u 1 one guess what they say Wacko got caught in the play Kinderactive Another man in need of some ass Another child whose parents love cash A superstar in need of some press Kinderactive Ain't that a child? CHORUS: I'll tell u what 2 do and U'll do it Illegal? What the fuck let's get 2 it Up and down, around and all through it Baby baby boy let's do it Kinderactive Everything U got is so tight (Kinderactive) Just relax your muscles and it won't be a plight (Kinderactive) You can sleep in my bed tonite Kinderactive Ahh, hey there boy, I'll do ya till you're bored Me and your parents will settle out of court I'll put a security guard outside the door Kinderactive Oh, ain't that a boy? CHORUS (As long as we get 2 it, 2 it, 2 it) Yeah, yeah Check out this mole on my dick (Kinderactive, kinderactive) They'll use it against me to identify my prick I'll use KY and make it nice and slick (Kinderactive) Ain't that a boy? Ow! Kinderactive Oh, oh One more, one more That is severely twisted and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
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Sexy Toddler
Sexy toddler, I want your body now sexy toddler, I want your body now Owww! sexy toddler, I want you body now (repeat as necessary) [This message was edited Fri Nov 21 6:48:45 PST 2003 by JimmyNothing] Put yourself on the worldwide org map! www.frappr.com/princeorg | |
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JimmyNothing said: Sexy Toddler
Sexy toddler, I want your body now sexy toddler, I want your body now Owww! sexy toddler, I want you body now (repeat as necessary) Or how about: Sexy Toddler, you hairless body, hairless body Sexy Toddler, you hairless body, wow [/quote] and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
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IstenSzek said: Sexy Toddler, you hairless body, hairless body
Sexy Toddler, you hairless body, wow OF course this one is supreme. | |
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One Of Your Crayons
Did U get the Disney-tape I sent U? The one we’d watch 2gether in my bed Then afterwards we’d explore our mutual orifices Litte boy, you gave good head All the things we did after the picture All the things this Wacko did witcha I see my hand in the small of your back I see my face in your juvenile crack, in fact Sometimes I wanna pleasure myself with one of your crayons I think I just blew my career It has ceased 2 exist, ceased 2 be here If U sue me I’ll settle and come back again I wish I could disappear (Vegas, Vegas) Sometimes I wanna pleasure myself with one of your crayons (One, one, one) I'm lyin' Sometimes I wanna pleasure myself with one of your crayons {x2} © 2003 Outtatime Music - ASCAP | |
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Kiss cover
You don't have to be a teenager, to turn me on Just as long as you're a little boy, Your ass is gone You don't need experience, I'll give you that Just lay down in my wacko bed, unless you've got a twat You don't have to be rich, but your parents will (When I pay them off!) Ain't no need to brink a bottle, I'll give you some wine You don't have to be a cop, to take away my vids You just got to know that I love all... Kids! Put yourself on the worldwide org map! www.frappr.com/princeorg | |
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MartyMcFly said: Picked up my paper 2day
Give u 1 one guess what they say Wacko got caught in the play Kinderactive Another man in need of some ass Another child whose parents love cash A superstar in need of some press Kinderactive Ain't that a child? CHORUS: I'll tell u what 2 do and U'll do it Illegal? What the fuck let's get 2 it Up and down, around and all through it Baby baby boy let's do it Kinderactive Everything U got is so tight (Kinderactive) Just relax your muscles and it won't be a plight (Kinderactive) You can sleep in my bed tonite Kinderactive Ahh, hey there boy, I'll do ya till you're bored Me and your parents will settle out of court I'll put a security guard outside the door Kinderactive Oh, ain't that a boy? CHORUS (As long as we get 2 it, 2 it, 2 it) Yeah, yeah Check out this mole on my dick (Kinderactive, kinderactive) They'll use it against me to identify my prick I'll use KY and make it nice and slick (Kinderactive) Ain't that a boy? Ow! Kinderactive Oh, oh One more, one more Great! "It's better 2 B hated 4 what U R than 2 B loved 4 what U R not."
My IQ is 139, what's yours? | |
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not a 100% okay, but still...
Michael NOT Waiting sung by Mcaully I'm of a mind 2 make some mookie, he he… phonebook" The phone rings - it's Michael callin' He wants me 2 come 2 his crib U see, sharing a bed is better than being lonely So I try my best 2 ad lib He told me about the artist Who asked his lover - "Why is your organ so small?" He replied, "I'm only 12 years old" I didn't mind at all This is where he wants 2 be And I am who he wants 2 see I've never known a love so sweet I wont keep Michael waiting Alright All is well in Neverland The sound of child porn is all U hear Sometime a monkey takes the place of my body Sometimes my body's here U see, when boys are your only love All that matters - the present, the here and now People, people - whatever floats Michael's boat Is whatever this Michael will bang CHORUS: This is where he wants 2 be I am who he wants 2 see Never known a love so sweet I won't keep Michael waiting Oh yeah | |
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MartyMcFly said: One Of Your Crayons
Did U get the Disney-tape I sent U? The one we’d watch 2gether in my bed Then afterwards we’d explore our mutual orifices Litte boy, you gave good head All the things we did after the picture All the things this Wacko did witcha I see my hand in the small of your back I see my face in your juvenile crack, in fact Sometimes I wanna pleasure myself with one of your crayons I think I just blew my career It has ceased 2 exist, ceased 2 be here If U sue me I’ll settle and come back again I wish I could disappear (Vegas, Vegas) Sometimes I wanna pleasure myself with one of your crayons (One, one, one) I'm lyin' Sometimes I wanna pleasure myself with one of your crayons {x2} © 2003 Outtatime Music - ASCAP This one is simply wicked. Hahaha. Damn, that's cool. and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
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GREAT THREAD, EXCELLENT POSTS. http://elmadartista.tumblr.com/ http://twitter.com/madartista | |
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madartista said: EXCELLENT POSTS. co-sign. y'all contributed some very funny stuff!! and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
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wow | |
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In May watch out for the release of 'Ladsexy' by MJ. The feeling you get when you fall in love not with Tatum, Brooke or Diana but... well, you know.
The CD opens with the voice of someone credited as "The Spirit Kid" Rain is wet/Sugar is sweet Help me put these rubbers on my feet Everybody everybody knows When jail calls you got to go Then MJ annouces "Welcome to the new toddler generation. All of you go out and buy "Let It Be... Naked to finance the trial." With R. Kelly handling co-production duties the tracks include: If I Was Your Playen Girls and Boys (Don't enter my room) In This Bed U Scream I Could Never Take The Place Of Your Girl Gavin Waiting A rare cover of "Sweet Child Of Mine" featuring Slash on guitar. The limited edition DVD will include prison footage including the inmate standing behind MJ in the shower singing "You Are Not Alone" | |
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cranshaw62 said: 'Ladsexy' by MJ.
and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
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mike likes em so young, pretty soon he's gonna start fucking aborted fetuses | |
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http://truthout.org/docs_...103A.shtml
George W. Bush Loves Michael Jackson By William Rivers Pitt t r u t h o u t | Perspective Friday 21 November 2003 A number of explosions tore through the British consulate in Turkey today, killing scores of people. George W. Bush is in England, surrounded on all sides by enraged British citizens whose massive protests have required nearly every police officer in London to be put on the line of defense. This is happening in a nation that has been, both in government and among the populace, one of the strongest allies America has ever known. There are a couple of wars happening in Iraq and Afghanistan, neither of which are going very well. A great many soldiers and civilians have died in the last year. Osama bin Laden is still on the loose, and after nearly 750 days, the American people have still been given no explanation for why September 11 happened. It is 3:16 p.m. on Thursday afternoon as I write this. CNN has been covering, with total exclusivity, a parking lot outside a police station for the last hour. They covered an airplane landing. They covered the same airplane sitting still on the tarmac. They covered the airplane slowly moving into a hangar. All the while, talking head after talking head explored every conceivable facet of the parking lot, the plane, the tarmac, and the hangar, as well as a variety of parallel issues. No stone of data was left unturned. Why? Michael Jackson is about to surrender to police. In the last two years, CNN has not devoted this much energy and coverage to any story in the manner that is unfolding right now. Enron, the stock market, the reasons for September 11, the nomination of Henry Kissinger to chair the investigation into that event, the disinformation that was pushed by the Bush administration before the attack on Iraq, the civilian casualties during the attack on Iraq, the American troop casualties during and after the attack on Iraq, the missing weapons of mass destruction, the missing Osama bin Laden, the war in Afghanistan that is far from over, the outing of a CIA agent by the Bush administration in an act of political revenge, and about two hundred other explosive stories did not get the attention that Michael Jackson is getting now. One talking head just said, "I'm waiting for a white Bronco to pull up." The other talking heads laughed and kept on going. A detailed discussion progressed about the tail numbers on Michael Jackson's plane, along with questions about how all this will affect Jackson's fans. We're approaching the two-hour mark in the coverage. For a while we had the Petersons to obsess the mainstream television media. Then we had Kobe Bryant, and for a bit both stories ran concurrently with 'Breaking News' announcements throughout daily coverage. Neither managed to seize national attention, and so periodically CNN and the other networks were forced to mention that the fighting in Iraq is getting a lot of Americans killed, the promised weapons of mass destruction have not been found, and no one but Dick Cheney can say that Iraq was involved in September 11 without looking like a total blithering idiot. And then, like a surgically enhanced cavalry charge, Michael Jackson blasts to the forefront to rescue the mainstream media from perhaps being required to cover matters of substance. The ability for these talking heads to natter on for weeks and weeks about Jackson, previous charges against him, his musical history, his personal oddities, his baby-dangling antics, and "Oh my goodness, what do we tell the children?" is pretty much bottomless, but we will spend the next several weeks, again, racing to that bottom as quickly as television signals can travel through a coaxial cable. A black Bronco just left the airplane hangar, and is driving slowly, slowly to the police station. CNN is on it. CNN is all over it. One of the shots on my television an hour ago showed a gaggle of reporters and cameras gathered outside the police station, waiting for Jackson to arrive. The talking head working the microphone at that moment mistakenly called those people "journalists." This is not journalism, and those people are not journalists. This is entertainment television passed off as news of import. This is more poison poured into our national discussion. This is the grand bull moose gold medal winning distraction of all time. George W. Bush should send Michael Jackson flowers and a thank-you note, and send more flowers to CNN. The Republican Party effected an historic takeover of Congress in 1994, during a time when the only television coverage one could find focused on OJ Simpson. The timing was exquisite. We're right back, today, to that marvelous chapter in American journalism history. TV news viewers who think they are getting the hard truth from the mainstream media just forgot Bush exists, forgot the hundreds of thousands of protesters who have dogged his state visit to Britain, forgot the attacks in Iraq, forgot the dead soldiers, forgot September 11, forgot everything except a mutant in a Bronco who lives in a place called Neverland. They just showed Jackson in handcuffs. The talking heads almost fainted. God bless America. --- William Rivers Pitt is the Managing Editor of truthout.org. He is a New York Times and international best-selling author of three books - "War On Iraq," available from Context Books, "The Greatest Sedition is Silence," available from Pluto Press, and "Our Flag, Too: The Paradox of Patriotism," available in August from Context Books. | |
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JudasLChrist said: http://truthout.org/docs_03/112103A.shtml
George W. Bush Loves Michael Jackson By William Rivers Pitt t r u t h o u t | Perspective Friday 21 November 2003 A number of explosions tore through the British consulate in Turkey today, killing scores of people. George W. Bush is in England, surrounded on all sides by enraged British citizens whose massive protests have required nearly every police officer in London to be put on the line of defense. This is happening in a nation that has been, both in government and among the populace, one of the strongest allies America has ever known. There are a couple of wars happening in Iraq and Afghanistan, neither of which are going very well. A great many soldiers and civilians have died in the last year. Osama bin Laden is still on the loose, and after nearly 750 days, the American people have still been given no explanation for why September 11 happened. It is 3:16 p.m. on Thursday afternoon as I write this. CNN has been covering, with total exclusivity, a parking lot outside a police station for the last hour. They covered an airplane landing. They covered the same airplane sitting still on the tarmac. They covered the airplane slowly moving into a hangar. All the while, talking head after talking head explored every conceivable facet of the parking lot, the plane, the tarmac, and the hangar, as well as a variety of parallel issues. No stone of data was left unturned. Why? Michael Jackson is about to surrender to police. In the last two years, CNN has not devoted this much energy and coverage to any story in the manner that is unfolding right now. Enron, the stock market, the reasons for September 11, the nomination of Henry Kissinger to chair the investigation into that event, the disinformation that was pushed by the Bush administration before the attack on Iraq, the civilian casualties during the attack on Iraq, the American troop casualties during and after the attack on Iraq, the missing weapons of mass destruction, the missing Osama bin Laden, the war in Afghanistan that is far from over, the outing of a CIA agent by the Bush administration in an act of political revenge, and about two hundred other explosive stories did not get the attention that Michael Jackson is getting now. One talking head just said, "I'm waiting for a white Bronco to pull up." The other talking heads laughed and kept on going. A detailed discussion progressed about the tail numbers on Michael Jackson's plane, along with questions about how all this will affect Jackson's fans. We're approaching the two-hour mark in the coverage. For a while we had the Petersons to obsess the mainstream television media. Then we had Kobe Bryant, and for a bit both stories ran concurrently with 'Breaking News' announcements throughout daily coverage. Neither managed to seize national attention, and so periodically CNN and the other networks were forced to mention that the fighting in Iraq is getting a lot of Americans killed, the promised weapons of mass destruction have not been found, and no one but Dick Cheney can say that Iraq was involved in September 11 without looking like a total blithering idiot. And then, like a surgically enhanced cavalry charge, Michael Jackson blasts to the forefront to rescue the mainstream media from perhaps being required to cover matters of substance. The ability for these talking heads to natter on for weeks and weeks about Jackson, previous charges against him, his musical history, his personal oddities, his baby-dangling antics, and "Oh my goodness, what do we tell the children?" is pretty much bottomless, but we will spend the next several weeks, again, racing to that bottom as quickly as television signals can travel through a coaxial cable. A black Bronco just left the airplane hangar, and is driving slowly, slowly to the police station. CNN is on it. CNN is all over it. One of the shots on my television an hour ago showed a gaggle of reporters and cameras gathered outside the police station, waiting for Jackson to arrive. The talking head working the microphone at that moment mistakenly called those people "journalists." This is not journalism, and those people are not journalists. This is entertainment television passed off as news of import. This is more poison poured into our national discussion. This is the grand bull moose gold medal winning distraction of all time. George W. Bush should send Michael Jackson flowers and a thank-you note, and send more flowers to CNN. The Republican Party effected an historic takeover of Congress in 1994, during a time when the only television coverage one could find focused on OJ Simpson. The timing was exquisite. We're right back, today, to that marvelous chapter in American journalism history. TV news viewers who think they are getting the hard truth from the mainstream media just forgot Bush exists, forgot the hundreds of thousands of protesters who have dogged his state visit to Britain, forgot the attacks in Iraq, forgot the dead soldiers, forgot September 11, forgot everything except a mutant in a Bronco who lives in a place called Neverland. They just showed Jackson in handcuffs. The talking heads almost fainted. God bless America. --- William Rivers Pitt is the Managing Editor of truthout.org. He is a New York Times and international best-selling author of three books - "War On Iraq," available from Context Books, "The Greatest Sedition is Silence," available from Pluto Press, and "Our Flag, Too: The Paradox of Patriotism," available in August from Context Books. deep. thank you. have a cold one on me | |
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