The door vanishes.

Prince thinks for a long moment and then steps into door....[/quote]

...number 2. He is transported through a portal and all his albums flash before his eyes. He lands in the middle of a press-conference, taking place two years after he left. Millions of fans and media are around, angry and holding an album cover in their hands. It is a cover he doesn't recognize. It is his new album (which he doesn't remember recording having missed it in the portal).

The fans are angry, and prince wonders what the hell he recorded and put out that would piss off so many people.

A reporter leans in and asks: "Why did you do it Prince? The question on everybody's lips it quite simply: Why did you say that on your new record? And explain the cover!"

Prince has no idea what or why he had recorded, but reponds:
[Edited 5/22/06 18:29pm]

mattperry said:

...number 2. He is transported through a portal and all his albums flash before his eyes. He lands in the middle of a press-conference, taking place two years after he left. Millions of fans and media are around, angry and holding an album cover in their hands. It is a cover he doesn't recognize. It is his new album (which he doesn't remember recording having missed it in the portal).

The fans are angry, and prince wonders what the hell he recorded and put out that would piss off so many people.

A reporter leans in and asks: "Why did you do it Prince? The question on everybody's lips it quite simply: Why did you say that on your new record? And explain the cover!"

Prince has no idea what or why he had recorded, but reponds:
[Edited 5/22/06 18:29pm]
[/quote]

'Look at the cover, can't you see the deeper meaning? Do you take every thing at face value?'

Prince takes a close look at the cover and his eyes water. 'Look its perfect the balance of sun, water, and an asian man with nipples likes chocolate sprinkles. It represents....'

Hate to uh...interrupt the flow here but is that guy dead? If so, this is suddenly not fun or funny.

littlemissG said:

'Look at the cover, can't you see the deeper meaning? Do you take every thing at face value?'

Prince takes a close look at the cover and his eyes water. 'Look its perfect the balance of sun, water, and an asian man with nipples likes chocolate sprinkles. It represents....'

[/quote]

O.k...the beastiality and the gayness was leaning way too much toward personal preference…but WTF!!...this thread took a turn for the idiotic...this is neither funny, creative or interesting.
[Edited 5/23/06 7:14am]

Prince- "This album cover represents... my career, its over. I will not record another album or perform in pubic".
Crowd- "Hooray!!!Woooo!!!"
Reporter- "What will you do now?"
Prince- "I will be focusing all of my attention on my new career as the new host of Soul Train"

panther514 said:

This is kinda sorta an inside joke. That's a picture of me taken several years ago at cocoa beach. I lay there for 15 minutes in that position barely moving at a very crowded beach and not one single person bothered to see if I was ok. I was trying to prove a point to a buddy of mine that people don't care anymore.

The picture's become somewhat of an inside joke in the General Discussion forum where some of the posters here are better known.

Imago said:

Good to have you back from the dead.
In that case it's very funny.

air said:

Of course, he only says this to buy a little time to catch up on the last 2 years of his life and to get acquainted with his CD.
He knew that he could later write it all off as a joke.

..but then he takes another look at the dead guy. That with the sounds of the cheering crowd, triggers flashes of his alternate existence. He begins to remember and he is angered...

Prince: (Steps forward and says boldly) Do you really want to know what this is all about? It's about the state of delusion today. It's my way to say let's wake up from our fantasy lives and deal with the realities on our door steps. I know it's harsh but so is the real world. We are all so obsessesed with "Reality TV"...well this is my "Reality CD". Welcome 2 it!

Reporter: Prince that sounds wonderful except how do you explain the songs?

Prince glances at the tracklist and is dumbfounded. The song titles are...

anon said:

The song titles are:

1) Wanna Be Startin Somethin'
2) Baby Be Mine
3) The Girl is Mine
4) Thriller
5) Beat it
6) Billie Jean
7) Human Nature
8) PYT
9) The Lady in My Life


"erm..." Prince said kind of nervously, "These songs represent a collective conciousness of collective wisdome collected from the resevoirs of concious collectivity...."

The crowd stood silent for what seemed like 15 minutes.

"Excuse me folks, " Prince said walking backwards as he slipped throw a back alley and ran like hell.

He ran and ran and ran panting like a dog--he could hear trampling feet following him in the distance.

He took a quick turn down an ajacent dark alley and found a doorway in an old brick building and slipped inside.

He found himself in a cold dark room, resembling something between a dungeon and a giant storage facility.

"Hello Prince, " a voice said, "we've been expecting you."

Out stepped Donald Rumsfeld, Morrissey, and Big Foot.....





Foot/Food freudian slip
[Edited 5/23/06 11:31am]

Imago said:

But these three began to flicker on and off like a lightbulb burning through its last bit of filament...and then they were gone. Was it his mind playing tricks? If so, what would explain the stench of Bigfoot... because it still lingered. Somehow the overlap in these realities was causing them to merge. Prince knew that this could be dangerous. Where are the answers now? Who must he seek out? The only person he could think of was...
[Edited 5/23/06 12:00pm]

anon said:

DOCTOR WHO!!

'Yes! I'll call the Doctor!!' Prince ran to the room where he keep his sonic screwdriver locked in a safe. He adjusted the settings to emit a frequence that would activate the destress signal in the Doctor's TARDIS. Prince decided to write in his journal while he waits.

He wrote:

Dear Diary:...

Damn I'm hungry ! I wish I had some BBQ Tofu Tenders !!!!

air said:

continuing, prince writes: Soul Train will give me the chance influnce slang! Something I've failed at in my career. At last people will use terms I create. I can also turn the tide of popular music. Yes Diary this will work!

Giggling, Prince....

littlemissG said:

Finally it appears! The TARDIS! "I'll finally figure out this shit..." thought Prince. But out steps not Dr. Who, but a funky looking man in surgeon's clothes and sunglasses.

Prince: "Dr. Fink??!!"
Dr. Fink: "Long time no see Prince."
Prince: "What the hell are you doing here? Where's Dr. Who?"
Dr. Fink: "I'm the new Time Lord."
Prince: "Damn man! Don't you play keyboards anymore?"
Dr. Fink: "Sure I do. Check out my gear."

They both step into the Tardis. It's filled with synths...

Dr. Fink: "This is how I control the Tardis."

Fink plays the synth riff from Head. The Tardis starts up.

Dr. Fink: "Wanna jam?"
Prince: "Later. What the hell's going on? Why did I record Thriller, and why are all my fans mad at me?"

coolcat said:

Prince :That's it! ...Why did I record Thriller?!
Prince realizes that he had been looking in the wrong places. The clue is right before him...the most obvious of things...his latest CD.

Why the Michael songs? Could they be encrypted? Could this be a clue that he left for himself? What if Michael assisted him? It's apparent now that this is the man he must speak with....this is the one that will help to fill in the missing pieces.

Prince : Doc...I gotta go.

Prince heads towards the nearest door.
Dr Fink, however, has other plans.

Dr Fink : Prince, you must stay and play!

Prince : No...I really can't. See...I have to find a way out of this overlap before my worlds close in on me completely or God forbid, Imago has another Freudian slip and forgets to correct it.

Dr Fink : (more forcefully) Prince, you must stay and play.
Prince suddenly remembers the power this man, now, has over him. He must think quickly.

[2 seconds later]

Ad Space!

And Prince is off to get these questions answered. Only problem... Michael is in.....

anon said:

...Seclusion.

Prince is at a loss....not only this, but he realizes that he's ruined a perfectly good way out of this story because Anon confused the Dr. Who/Fink with an entirely different character.

Prince returns to the Tardis.

Prince: Doc, I need you to take me back a few hours to that previous post.

[Cut to: new present]

coolcat said:

Prince :That's it! ...Why did I record Thriller?!
Prince realizes that he had been looking in the wrong places. The clue is right before him...the most obvious of things...his latest CD.

Why the Michael songs? Could they be encrypted? Could this be a clue that he left for himself? What if Michael assisted him? It's apparent now that this is the man he must speak with....this is the one that will help to fill in the missing pieces. But to find him he must travel to a time where he can be sure to find him.

Fink powers up and sets the coordinates to....

Michael Jackson CDs are like kryptonite to our wee man. He starts to lose his powers, the funk is slowly disintergrating...he has to get out of this room which is decorated with wall to wall MJ albums. “That white socked mo fo… If only I could get back to Paisley” he murmurs “everything would be Ok then. I could spend a night sleeping in my bootleg chamber and the funk would be restored. But how do I get out of here…?!!”
He frantically searches his pockets and finds a Larry pill “Oh no! It’s the last one!”. He swallows it hurriedly and this temporarily maximises his funk levels. Newly fortified with funk, he manages to dodge the guards surrounding him and escape. Once in the street he jumps onto his cloud guitar which he plays with his feet while he travels though the skies…”beautiful that ‘s what I am, that’s what I am” rings in his ears.

When he finally arrives at Paisley Park he sees that it is surrounded by one- gloved fans. “What the duck?!” he exclaims as he flies over the gates. He parks his cloud and approaches the doors. Usually they open with just a look, but today they remain locked. He says the backup password “Supercalilarryfunkysexy” but still, no luck! Unable to enter his own empire he rushes to the nearest window and to his horror he sees Michael Jackson surrounded by Susan Moonsie, Vanity, Applonnia, Susanah, Cat, Sheila, Kim B, Anna Garcia, Kim Basinger, Diamond and Pearl, Carmen, Mayte, Mani, Tamar, the Twinz, Liza Hernandez and Larry all dressed in lingerie and singing “Sex shooter, shootin’ up in your direction”. In a pile in the corner there are a pile of non–disclosures burning…and a ghost writer with a laptop. Michael clicks his fingers and the women stop singing. They turn to the window where Prince is weeping and say in unison “We are ready to talk”. Michael throws his head back and laughs…”I’ve stolen your funk Nelson, you’re finished.”

Elodie said:

Princes'Soliloquy:

Prince: Why did I go thru such great length to get to Michael only to run from him? Why did I need the Tardis when my cloud guitar can travel thru time and space? And why is it that my Cloud guitar is just laying around on the streets of Neverland?

Why were these powers not revealed to me sooner so that I could have avoided all that Imago has subjected me to? Perhaps, I could have avoided this story too. Perhaps I should.

Elodie may be right about one thing..."it's finished".


unless....

anon said:

Prince in a moment of revelation screams 'LITTLEMISSG HELP ME!!!'

'U screamed?' LittlemissG answers.

Prince turns suddenly to see the Godess of Prince.Org Story Threads. Her light brown hair highlighted with golden chestnut, her bright sparkling hazel eyes, her full playful lips, her full onion just begging to be peeled fills him with both longing and sorrow for he knows he can never have her for he is just a mere mortal.

'Oh beautiful G do you know what I have suffered?' Prince says slapping his hands over his eyes.

'Yes Purple One, I do. I'm sorry about Imago, but we have to let him create his homosexual fanastys on occasion or things could get ugly on the org. As for your current situation, you seem to have lost your career, your life, and worst of all your funk to Michael Jackson. I fear this tragedy was engineered by your worst enemy, whom you must destroy as you have before.'

LittlemissG steps forward and gives Prince a silver box.
'Inside Great Musician you will find what you need to make things as there were before. Do not open it until the time is right.'

Prince puzzled, 'How will I know the time is right?'

'You just will. When things have gone past all control and sensibility.'

LittlemissG also hands Prince a small vinyl book.
'Take this phonebook my Prince, it contains the numbers for Jay Leno, Oprah, Soul Train, and all the other booking agents you should be in touch to promote 3121 if you don't want to land in another half-baked era of your career like the 90's!'

Then LittlemissG starts to fade away.

'Please Goddess Do Something about Imago!' Prince yelled after her.

LittlemissG just shrugged, waved, and vanished.

Prince knew he would have to summon all of his courage to face....
[Edited 5/24/06 13:28pm]

CJ aka Billy Jack Bitch. She had somehow gained video footage of these man to man antics and had threatened to expose Prince in The Daily Tribune. Logging in to check his e-mails Prince opened an e-mail demanding "You have 7 days to write your name on my walls...or else. CJ."

Surely it couldn't get much worse?! "If only Goddess were here to help me...But wait...the phonebook!"
"Hello American Idol...can I play on your show tonight? Please?! I'll be really good, honest!" Prince put down the receiver and sighed...if he played American Idol surely he would have enough money to pay CJ off without having to show her a good time. Also, he would get his funk back, people would hear 3121 and maybe then Larry, Tamar and the Twinz and would kick Jacko and all the other sex shooters out of the house and he would be able to go back to Paisley at last.

"But wait! I'm not supposed to believe in idols...how can I get around this?..."

No one nearby was able to answer his question. So, for advice, he picked up the phone and called up...

Protege said:

The Godfather himself...James Brown...He explained the situation to JB and James replyed" Damn! wasuneedtodo is tellumuneedstohollarHEYYYYY! supposedtobeebop!

Prince replyed "thanks Godfather" and hung up....regretting that call he picks up the phone to call.....

panther514 said:

dionne warwick cause she can use her ESPN and tell him what the deal is. but just then mani sitting at the pc interupts prince. "hey,umm i think you need to take a look at this ?" "whats with the face" prince said? "its that prince.org site again they made of those fun story threads you told me to never post on again....anyways they keep making you have gay sex in great detail in the story and people are LOLing at it. " they totally forgot about that 90210 album..." 3121 DAMNIT!!!" "oh yeah i meant that" replied a smirking mani. prince was obviously mad that people think hes gay. "wtf why do people keep thinkin me-prince roger nelson is gay?!"...i just...

Christopher said:

then the phone rings.
"I'll get it", Prince says. "Yes, yes, paint it all purple, put a big neon 3121 sign in front." Prince hangs up. "My Vegas club is coming along on schedule!' taking Mani my the shoulders he exclaims, 'Its going to legendary, like nothing anyone seen before! It's...."

Before Prince can finish a ghostly vision appears.



Preeance Preeance, I am your father!!

Stunned Prince.....
[Edited 5/27/06 14:53pm]