...all of them?

Hmm, I don't think so. However, one time I didn't bother going to a wedding because I knew it was not going to last.

novabrkr said:

Hmm, I don't think so. However, one time I didn't bother going to a wedding because I knew it was not going to last.

and did it? or not?

Spanky said:

chocolate1 said:

Yes.

A close friend from college married a guy all the friends KNEW slept with one of the crew. We tried our best to get her away from him BEFORE they were engaged, but no one told her about Stephanie. She married him anyway....

Fast-forward about 10 years: They got divorced.

My friend called me and said, "Did you know he slept with Stephanie in college?"

Thank Goodness she accepted my apology and admitted that she would have called us liars anyway back then.

Sometimes there is nothing you CAN do.

why didn't you tell her when they started dating? It didn't cross your mind til the fucking wedding day? Too late then. But after their first dinner and a movie maybe you mention it. Just sayin.

Are you kidding?

They started dating the summer after freshman year. I didn't know him "after the first date". I met him the following semester when we got back to school.

We constantly told her what an asshole he was. She was giving him money even though she was living on student aid, it seemed like he was always drunk, and he wasn't very nice to her friends. If any of us said anything to her, she got an attitude and started with the, "You don't know him" crap. So by senior year, we realized he wasn't going away.

I think her parents pushed her to marry him, too, because they realized she had been sleeping with him all through college (very religious).

I was the only one of our friends who went to her wedding. Stephanie was too guilty and the rest were too disgusted. But I was her friend, so I went. In the weeks leading up to the wedding, I kept asking her if she was sure. She was so head over heels for that loser, that I stopped interfering. As far as Stephanie is concerned- she begged us not to tell because she had her own relationship and she didn't want to lose K's friendship.

K and I are still friends- and we're 43. That jerk has no contact with the kids, and she has a restraining order against him. She found out about Stephanie because HE told her. He blurted it out in a fight, then said, "Ask your friends. They knew." Nice, huh?

You can't tell someone who to marry. You can try to make them see why it's wrong if you feel the friendship is strong enough.... After that, they're on their own.

My Dad's mom hates my Mom. They started dating when my mom was 16. He took her to the Senior Prom. They've been married for 47 years, and at 96, Grandma STILL says Mom isn't right for Dad.

chocolate1 said:

My Dad's mom hates my Mom. They started dating when my mom was 16. He took her to the Senior Prom. They've been married for 47 years, and at 96, Grandma STILL says Mom isn't right for Dad.

well that's just DAFT!

They officially broke up a few months ago. I'd say it lasted a lot longer than what I had predicted. She was constantly speaking about her ex, so I suspected she just wanted to get married with another guy in order to show him that she could get someone.

Also, after my engagement broke up, my friends told me one by one that they didn't like him and were glad I wasn't marrying him. One even said that she and her husband thought he was on the DL.

When I told a couple of other friends what she said, they agreed!

Everyone said the same thing: I was so happy at the time that they didn't want to say anything to ruin it for me in case they were wrong.

I realized on my own that he wasn't right for me.

chocolate1 said:

Also, after my engagement broke up, my friends told me one by one that they didn't like him and were glad I wasn't marrying him. One even said that she and her husband thought he was on the DL.

When I told a couple of other friends what she said, they agreed!

Everyone said the same thing: I was so happy at the time that they didn't want to say anything to ruin it for me in case they were wrong.

I realized on my own that he wasn't right for me.

Won't it make you wonder what they really think the next time you meet someone though?

It's easy to get paranoid when people retroactively offer their true sentiments like that.

can your friends really put you off someone, though?

whistle said:

can your friends really put you off someone, though?

I don't reckon, when all your hormones are raging, your friends are just IDIOTS!

ZombieKitten said:

whistle said:

can your friends really put you off someone, though?

I don't reckon, when all your hormones are raging, your friends are just IDIOTS!

aye, especially if they're single. you'll only mark them as jealous, miserable bastards.

ZombieKitten said:

whistle said:

can your friends really put you off someone, though?

I don't reckon, when all your hormones are raging, your friends are just IDIOTS!

Right!

So we can't be blamed when things don't go right. We saw it coming, but our friends were in no position to receive it.

retina said:

chocolate1 said:

Also, after my engagement broke up, my friends told me one by one that they didn't like him and were glad I wasn't marrying him. One even said that she and her husband thought he was on the DL.

When I told a couple of other friends what she said, they agreed!

Everyone said the same thing: I was so happy at the time that they didn't want to say anything to ruin it for me in case they were wrong.

I realized on my own that he wasn't right for me.

Won't it make you wonder what they really think the next time you meet someone though?

It's easy to get paranoid when people retroactively offer their true sentiments like that.

It happened again with my last bf. My friends didn't like him.

I started to question my ability to choose a suitable mate.

Graycap23 said:

What do u do?

yes! keep your mouth shut and go through the motions?

ZombieKitten said:

orger said:

my grandmother (hateful, hateful woman) informed me

a few days before my wedding

that it wasn't going to last

and that she wouldn't be attending

well, I'm still married

and she's dead

I win

that's awful!

and funny! ah, love~!

whistle said:

ZombieKitten said:

I don't reckon, when all your hormones are raging, your friends are just IDIOTS!

aye, especially if they're single. you'll only mark them as jealous, miserable bastards.

yep. friends don't like to hear that type of criticism at all.

best thing to do is, until they ask you, that is.

then, i think, if they are really, really asking for input and are turning to you as someone who has known and loved them forever, then yes, speak your mind, but do so very, very gently. just my 2c

No, not really. All the friends' weddings I've been to as an adult (after college) are still married.

I do have a friend getting married soon and I'm a bit skeptical about the fiance. I'm not too crazy about him but she seems happy so what can I do? -->

[Edited 10/2/10 16:46pm]

Yes, last year.

Just a few hours in the groom was bad-mouthing the bride's parents about how they're rich but hadn't given a huge load of cash to them as a present (even worse if you consider in Thailand the groom is supposed to give money and gold to the bride's parents).

During the reception he spent most of the time messing with his PS3, which he'd set up to show various pictures of himself and his bride, rather than mingling with guests and spending time with his wife. He also included in his slide-show, despite my advice not to, a pic of himself with his top off flexing his muscles in the mirror.

He intended later in the reception to sing karaoke ('Hero' by Enrique Iglesias) in front of everybody. He can't sing at all, and at the time I was glad it didn't happen, but now regret that I didn't get to enjoy what would surely have been one of the most hilarious experiences of my life.

Still, there was time for more awkwardness anyway. Mon and I had helped them set everything up and we helped them clear up afterwards. They weren't having a honeymoon straight away, and we were pretty tight with them at the time, spending lots of time with them and staying over at their house frequently (at his request), but still we thought it a bit much than he insisted we come back to their hotel room with them after to hang out. He thought it totally fine to have a few beers with me, presumably while our wives would keep each other company doing whatever women do together, on his and his wife's wedding night. He pushed and pushed and pushed and we stayed about half an hour before finally we managed to extricate ourselves and get a taxi home.

They broke up a few months later. We no longer have any contact with them. We were cast as villains by him and I hear they're actually back together now, so good luck to them!

Graycap23 said:

Ever been 2 a wedding that u KNEW was not going 2 last? What do u do?

Yes, I have been to several weddings that I knew would not last long (and they didn't). There really isn't much a person can do about it. The way I see it, even if you try to tell the person that the guy or girl they're going to marry is not right for them, there's a good chance that they're not going to listen to you anyways. Sometimes people have to figure things out for themselves.

Yes. I drank champagne, ate cake and wished them well.

As a child, I've watched a couple in my neighborhood, and their families and guest get prepared for a big wedding; limousines, flowers, and all. My mother told me later on they broke up a few years later.

psychodelicide said:

Graycap23 said:

Ever been 2 a wedding that u KNEW was not going 2 last? What do u do?

Yes, I have been to several weddings that I knew would not last long (and they didn't). There really isn't much a person can do about it. The way I see it, even if you try to tell the person that the guy or girl they're going to marry is not right for them, there's a good chance that they're not going to listen to you anyways. Sometimes people have to figure things out for themselves.

Good point.

Spanky said:

Genesia said:

Oh - and then, there's the case of my youngest sister, who married a guy she'd known about six months - and who turned out to be a crack addict.

The less said about that one, the better. She got herself disentangled, but not before a lot of heartache - for her and everyone else in our family.

Who is Betsey Johnson? btw, great stories! My sister got between me and my ex-fiance. We probably would have got a divorce eventually but now I'll never know. yes my ex was a bitch, but I loved her. And now I harbor bitterness toward my sister that has yet to manifest into action. I hope it never does. Half of me is glad she saved me half of me wishes I went through it and figured out shit for myself.

I couldn't have gotten between my sister and her ex - she'd married him before I met him. (They told us at my cousin's wedding that they'd gotten married.)

Betsey Johnson is a fashion designer.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Just enjoy the party and let them wreck their lives.

PREACH THAT SHIT!

Everything's free, why not have a good time?

uPtoWnNY said:

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Just enjoy the party and let them wreck their lives.

PREACH THAT SHIT!

Everything's free, why not have a good time?

I'm in one in a fews months.......I'll just go with it.

Hell yes...just went to one last weekend. And the bride (my cousin) had the nerve to be snobbish I give it at least 6 months.

missfee said:

Hell yes...just went to one last weekend. And the bride (my cousin) had the nerve to be snobbish I give it at least 6 months.

My cousin's first marriage lasted about a year. I was so ticked because of all the loot I spent on gifts.

uPtoWnNY said:

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Just enjoy the party and let them wreck their lives.

PREACH THAT SHIT!

Everything's free, why not have a good time?

missfee said:

Hell yes...just went to one last weekend. And the bride (my cousin) had the nerve to be snobbish I give it at least 6 months.

That is what I'm afraid of.