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Thread started 12/11/09 5:41am

Imago

I still find it hard to control my temper.

I don't get angry often. As a matter of fact, it's been a while since I've
been REALLY angry.

But when I do get angry, I end up saying and doing very hurtful things.

The funny thing is that I don't "blank" out and end up not realizing what
I say or do. I very much realize what I'm saying or doing as I'm lashing
out at somebody. I very much know at that very moment that I'm hurting them.

but it's like an itch I can't get rid of unless I scratch at it mercilessly.
What I truly hate about this is that I consider it a sign of immaturity.
I would never do it to my family, and certainly never to my nephews. So,
obviously, I have some self-control over destructive forms of expression.

Yet, I allow myself to be a complete ass when I shouldn't. Today, I had
an opportunity to pretty much tear someone to shreds, but opted not to
due to time and the fact that I had a lot of other things to think about.

But thinking back on the moment earlier today, I came to realize that it
was never anything worth escalating to that level anyways. It was all ego
stroking and my sticking to rigid principles instead of being flexible.

The conversation earlier with this person could have gone very very badly
if I had chosen to.

I think I'll meditate on this a while and figure out what's going on in my
brain. Obviously, I have some growing up to do.


Do any of you guys get 'mean-angry' ?
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Reply #1 posted 12/11/09 5:45am

RodeoSchro

FIRST!

And good luck!
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Reply #2 posted 12/11/09 5:45am

CarrieMpls

Ex-Moderator

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I think it's awesome that you stopped yourself.

hug
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Reply #3 posted 12/11/09 5:46am

RodeoSchro

And yes, I get "mean-angry". But I found out that's a by-product of diabetes.
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Reply #4 posted 12/11/09 5:50am

CarrieMpls

Ex-Moderator

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In general, no. It's very rare that I get mean-angry. Usually it means I'm feeling physically threatened (like in the midst of a NIN mosh pit, or that time I tried to break up a bar fight and got hit in the eye) and then I want to push or shove people, not say something hurtful. Though I might swear or something. And wow, it's really, really rare for me.

I'm not sure I CAN consciously and purposefully say something hurtful to someone. It would almost hurt me worse, I'd feel so badly about it. Even if I'm really, really angry.
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Reply #5 posted 12/11/09 5:50am

XxAxX

avatar

Imago said:

I don't get angry often. As a matter of fact, it's been a while since I've
been REALLY angry.

But when I do get angry, I end up saying and doing very hurtful things.

The funny thing is that I don't "blank" out and end up not realizing what
I say or do. I very much realize what I'm saying or doing as I'm lashing
out at somebody. I very much know at that very moment that I'm hurting them.

but it's like an itch I can't get rid of unless I scratch at it mercilessly.
What I truly hate about this is that I consider it a sign of immaturity.
I would never do it to my family, and certainly never to my nephews. So,
obviously, I have some self-control over destructive forms of expression.

Yet, I allow myself to be a complete ass when I shouldn't. Today, I had
an opportunity to pretty much tear someone to shreds, but opted not to
due to time and the fact that I had a lot of other things to think about.

But thinking back on the moment earlier today, I came to realize that it
was never anything worth escalating to that level anyways. It was all ego
stroking and my sticking to rigid principles instead of being flexible.

The conversation earlier with this person could have gone very very badly
if I had chosen to.

I think I'll meditate on this a while and figure out what's going on in my
brain. Obviously, I have some growing up to do.


Do any of you guys get 'mean-angry' ?



stfu!!!! stab of course i do not!!! you ARE the only human who does this!!!!*













*okay, sometimes i am cranky/mean when i am 1) sleep-deprived, or 2) hungry. my blood sugar drops and poof! i have no patience whatsoever.
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Reply #6 posted 12/11/09 5:51am

XxAxX

avatar

RodeoSchro said:

And yes, I get "mean-angry". But I found out that's a by-product of diabetes.



eek hmmm
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Reply #7 posted 12/11/09 5:51am

Imago

CarrieMpls said:

In general, no. It's very rare that I get mean-angry. Usually it means I'm feeling physically threatened (like in the midst of a NIN mosh pit, or that time I tried to break up a bar fight and got hit in the eye) and then I want to push or shove people, not say something hurtful. Though I might swear or something. And wow, it's really, really rare for me.

I'm not sure I CAN consciously and purposefully say something hurtful to someone. It would almost hurt me worse, I'd feel so badly about it. Even if I'm really, really angry.

Oh Honey hug

You can start by locking this thread: http://prince.org/msg/15/325859
but saying something very direct to the poster before it gets locked.
I hate that thread sooooo much hug

hug


GROUP. HUG. grouphug
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Reply #8 posted 12/11/09 5:52am

Evvy

avatar

RodeoSchro said:

And yes, I get "mean-angry". But I found out that's a by-product of diabetes.



-they say that about high blood pressure too... hmmm
LOVE HARD.
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Reply #9 posted 12/11/09 5:52am

whistle

avatar

ooo, sometimes i could just stamp my little feet!
everyone's a fruit & nut case
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Reply #10 posted 12/11/09 5:53am

Imago

XxAxX said:

Imago said:

I don't get angry often. As a matter of fact, it's been a while since I've
been REALLY angry.

But when I do get angry, I end up saying and doing very hurtful things.

The funny thing is that I don't "blank" out and end up not realizing what
I say or do. I very much realize what I'm saying or doing as I'm lashing
out at somebody. I very much know at that very moment that I'm hurting them.

but it's like an itch I can't get rid of unless I scratch at it mercilessly.
What I truly hate about this is that I consider it a sign of immaturity.
I would never do it to my family, and certainly never to my nephews. So,
obviously, I have some self-control over destructive forms of expression.

Yet, I allow myself to be a complete ass when I shouldn't. Today, I had
an opportunity to pretty much tear someone to shreds, but opted not to
due to time and the fact that I had a lot of other things to think about.

But thinking back on the moment earlier today, I came to realize that it
was never anything worth escalating to that level anyways. It was all ego
stroking and my sticking to rigid principles instead of being flexible.

The conversation earlier with this person could have gone very very badly
if I had chosen to.

I think I'll meditate on this a while and figure out what's going on in my
brain. Obviously, I have some growing up to do.


Do any of you guys get 'mean-angry' ?



stfu!!!! stab of course i do not!!! you ARE the only human who does this!!!!*













*okay, sometimes i am cranky/mean when i am 1) sleep-deprived, or 2) hungry. my blood sugar drops and poof! i have no patience whatsoever.

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Reply #11 posted 12/11/09 5:54am

CarrieMpls

Ex-Moderator

avatar

Imago said:

CarrieMpls said:

In general, no. It's very rare that I get mean-angry. Usually it means I'm feeling physically threatened (like in the midst of a NIN mosh pit, or that time I tried to break up a bar fight and got hit in the eye) and then I want to push or shove people, not say something hurtful. Though I might swear or something. And wow, it's really, really rare for me.

I'm not sure I CAN consciously and purposefully say something hurtful to someone. It would almost hurt me worse, I'd feel so badly about it. Even if I'm really, really angry.

Oh Honey hug

You can start by locking this thread: http://prince.org/msg/15/325859
but saying something very direct to the poster before it gets locked.
I hate that thread sooooo much hug

hug


GROUP. HUG. grouphug


I don't mod that forum. lol
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Reply #12 posted 12/11/09 5:54am

johnart

avatar

No. I will go off on someone but I'm always mindful of what I say. Some things can't be taken back once you say them.

I don't really believe in the "blanking" out. I think that's an excuse. People know they're saying when they're trying to be hurtful. There's intent and purpose.
[Edited 12/11/09 5:56am]
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Reply #13 posted 12/11/09 5:55am

Imago

johnart said:

No. I will go off on someone but I'm always mindful of what I say. Some things can't be taken back once you say them.

I don't really believe in the "blanking" out. I think that's an excuse. People know they're saying when they're trying to be hurtful. There's intention and purpose.



I love bottoms mushy
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Reply #14 posted 12/11/09 5:55am

CarrieMpls

Ex-Moderator

avatar

XxAxX said:


*okay, sometimes i am cranky/mean when i am 1) sleep-deprived, or 2) hungry. my blood sugar drops and poof! i have no patience whatsoever.


Oh I get SUPER crabby if I am either of the above.

But still not consciously mean. I try hard not to let my crabbiness show through.
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Reply #15 posted 12/11/09 5:56am

Imago

I have GOT to run down the street before they lock the west gate entrance to grab some food. I'll be back in 30-40 minutes.

Please don't post anything stupid in the meantime.
[Edited 12/11/09 5:56am]
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Reply #16 posted 12/11/09 5:57am

johnart

avatar

Imago said:

johnart said:

No. I will go off on someone but I'm always mindful of what I say. Some things can't be taken back once you say them.

I don't really believe in the "blanking" out. I think that's an excuse. People know they're saying when they're trying to be hurtful. There's intention and purpose.



I love bottoms mushy


falloff
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Reply #17 posted 12/11/09 5:57am

XxAxX

avatar

Imago said:

I have GOT to run down the street before they lock the west gate entrance to grab some food. I'll be back in 30-40 minutes.

Please don't post anything stupid in the meantime.
[Edited 12/11/09 5:56am]



ha. i got there first and ate ALLLLL the christmas peeps. too bad for you hmph!
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Reply #18 posted 12/11/09 5:59am

XxAxX

avatar

Imago said:

XxAxX said:




stfu!!!! stab of course i do not!!! you ARE the only human who does this!!!!*













*okay, sometimes i am cranky/mean when i am 1) sleep-deprived, or 2) hungry. my blood sugar drops and poof! i have no patience whatsoever.




is it wrong of me to find this guy kinda hot?? boxed maybe i'm just horny

crap. must sign off and get to work.

carry on ...
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Reply #19 posted 12/11/09 5:59am

johnart

avatar

Imago said:

I have GOT to run down the street before they lock the west gate entrance to grab some food. I'll be back in 30-40 minutes.

Please don't post anything stupid in the meantime.
[Edited 12/11/09 5:56am]


I love a challenge.
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Reply #20 posted 12/11/09 5:59am

XxAxX

avatar

CarrieMpls said:

XxAxX said:


*okay, sometimes i am cranky/mean when i am 1) sleep-deprived, or 2) hungry. my blood sugar drops and poof! i have no patience whatsoever.


Oh I get SUPER crabby if I am either of the above.

But still not consciously mean. I try hard not to let my crabbiness show through.



i can't imagine you being flat out mean hug
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Reply #21 posted 12/11/09 6:00am

JustErin

avatar

Being brutally mean when angry used to be a major problem for me. I'm not as bad now...I just think these thoughts now but don't verbalize them.
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Reply #22 posted 12/11/09 6:06am

myfavorite

avatar

so do you look for opportunites to blow up cause ordinarily you dont feel like you are in control???..or do you feel you were attacked directly???
THE B EST BE YOURSELF AS LONG AS YOUR SELF ISNT A DYCK[/r]

**....Someti
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Reply #23 posted 12/11/09 6:10am

mcmeekle

avatar

Imago said:

....I'll be back in 30-40 minutes.

Please don't post anything stupid in the meantime.

Oh, ok, I'll wait til you get back....

whistling
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Reply #24 posted 12/11/09 6:11am

BklynBabe

avatar

Story of my life, kid...

It's genetic, too. Everyone in my family, We are like the nicest mean folk you can meet. Passive-aggressive, and probably bipolar. Sometimes I can't even stand myself!

I work hard to try to contain as much of it as I can, but I have too much too deal with, then it becomes a problem, But I am really trying, because it has started to affect my physical and mental health. I have to learn to relax and not let stupid shit get to me. It sounds so simple, but yet.... sad
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Reply #25 posted 12/11/09 6:14am

IstenSzek

avatar

i can't get truly angry. ever. my anger always internalises
into selfdestructive behaviour.

which is just as much a problem i guess.

i did a role play about this with a psychologist a few times
and at the end of the session i sensed that he was angry and
i was still in my "oh, yes, you're being mean to me, well,
that's life"

lol
and true love lives on lollipops and crisps
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Reply #26 posted 12/11/09 6:33am

MrsMdiver

XxAxX said:

Imago said:

I don't get angry often. As a matter of fact, it's been a while since I've
been REALLY angry.

But when I do get angry, I end up saying and doing very hurtful things.

The funny thing is that I don't "blank" out and end up not realizing what
I say or do. I very much realize what I'm saying or doing as I'm lashing
out at somebody. I very much know at that very moment that I'm hurting them.

but it's like an itch I can't get rid of unless I scratch at it mercilessly.
What I truly hate about this is that I consider it a sign of immaturity.
I would never do it to my family, and certainly never to my nephews. So,
obviously, I have some self-control over destructive forms of expression.

Yet, I allow myself to be a complete ass when I shouldn't. Today, I had
an opportunity to pretty much tear someone to shreds, but opted not to
due to time and the fact that I had a lot of other things to think about.

But thinking back on the moment earlier today, I came to realize that it
was never anything worth escalating to that level anyways. It was all ego
stroking and my sticking to rigid principles instead of being flexible.

The conversation earlier with this person could have gone very very badly
if I had chosen to.

I think I'll meditate on this a while and figure out what's going on in my
brain. Obviously, I have some growing up to do.


Do any of you guys get 'mean-angry' ?



stfu!!!! stab of course i do not!!! you ARE the only human who does this!!!!*













*okay, sometimes i am cranky/mean when i am 1) sleep-deprived, or 2) hungry. my blood sugar drops and poof! i have no patience whatsoever.


Me too!
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Reply #27 posted 12/11/09 6:43am

Lammastide

avatar

RodeoSchro said:

And yes, I get "mean-angry". But I found out that's a by-product of diabetes.

What!?! lol Are you being serious??
Ὅσον ζῇς φαίνου
μηδὲν ὅλως σὺ λυποῦ
πρὸς ὀλίγον ἐστὶ τὸ ζῆν
τὸ τέλος ὁ χρόνος ἀπαιτεῖ.”
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Reply #28 posted 12/11/09 6:47am

Genesia

avatar

Lammastide said:

RodeoSchro said:

And yes, I get "mean-angry". But I found out that's a by-product of diabetes.

What!?! lol Are you being serious??


Yup. Hypoglycemia can make you act totally out of character.

My hypoglycemic "mean-angry" is usually directed at myself.
We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
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Reply #29 posted 12/11/09 6:52am

johnart

avatar

Genesia said:

Lammastide said:


What!?! lol Are you being serious??


Yup. Hypoglycemia can make you act totally out of character.

My hypoglycemic "mean-angry" is usually directed at myself.


I once went cookoo for cocoa puffs when my sugar dropped dangerously low due to a medical treatment and when my mom tried to "snap" me out of it with a slap I slapped her back boxed. I'd never in my life been restrained to a stretcher/bed. It was all kinds of fucked up. Part of me could tell some nonsensical shit was coming out my mouth but oops there it went and I could not stop it. Then I called Ron from my hospital bed when my sugar dropped again a few days later with an elaborate plan on how to break me out to go to a drag show. neutral Ok, that part sounds like something I'd actually do redface but I was once again talkin crazy shit. A nurse had to come in and straddle me (yes straddle) and shove some urrrrnj juice in me.

But medical reasons are different. Some people just wanna be mean fucks and then be all "oh, I couldn't help myself". Bulllllshit. No.
[Edited 12/11/09 6:54am]
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