http://news.yahoo.com/s/n...s_marriage

(just curious what the org married people think ...)

BERLIN (Reuters) - Bavaria's most glamorous politician -- a flame-haired motorcyclist who helped bring down state premier Edmund Stoiber -- has shocked the Catholic state in Germany by suggesting marriage should last just 7 years.

Gabriele Pauli, who poses on her web site in motorcycle leathers, is standing for the leadership of Bavaria's Christian Social Union (CSU) -- sister party of Chancellor Angela Merkel's conservative Christian Democrats (CDU) -- in a vote next week.

She told reporters at the launch of her campaign manifesto on Wednesday she wanted marriage to expire after seven years and accused the CSU, which promotes traditional family values, of nurturing ideals of marriage which are wide of the mark.

"The basic approach is wrong ... many marriages last just because people believe they are safe," she told reporters. "My suggestion is that marriages expire after seven years."

After that time, couples should either agree to extend their marriage or it should be automatically dissolved, she said.

Fifty-year-old Pauli, twice divorced, is a maverick intent on shaking up her male-dominated and mainly Catholic party which has dominated Bavarian politics since World War Two.

"This is about bringing ideas into the CSU and starting a discussion," she told German television on Thursday after she had unleashed a wave of criticism from other politicians.

Former foe Stoiber said she did not belong in the CSU and European lawmaker Ingo Freidrich dismissed her views.

"She is diametrically contradicting our Christian, ethical values," Freidrich said.

Peter Ramsauer, head of the CSU in Germany's parliament, compared Pauli's ideas to "the dirt under your fingernails".

Pauli, who attracted attention earlier this year when she posed for a magazine wearing long black latex gloves, was at the centre of a snooping scandal which eventually led to Stoiber, Bavarian premier for 14 years, saying he would stand down early.

She said his office tried to obtain details about lovers and alcohol consumption to use against her.

ColAngus said:

this thread wil likely end up in P & R

renewable marriage contracts with limited terms of applicability have existed in the past. the christian church and its model of 'marriage' has not always been the dominant approach to that covenant

PnR ewww .

i thought all the married orgers were worried their spouses would see what they wrote condemning marriages !!!

as an official policy i don't see this flying... too much "state all up in my business" kind of thing.

but as a personal goal it's kind of interesting.
*the notion that every so often you have to sit back and examine your relationship
*if you hesitate then it's an opportunity to explore why and put effort into it.
*and i like the idea that you stand before your partner and recommit yourselves to each other

emm said:

That should happen every day

I am truly a believer that nothing lasts forever and that for most people long term Marriage never works. I think Marriages would work a lot better if people thought of them more short term instead of thinking "I'm going to be with this person for the rest of my life". For some I think that holds true. Fro most, I think they like the idea.

It does complicate things a bit. CHildren and Money matters to name a few. But in general I like the idea and would be very much for it.

Even if this had the remote chance of ever happening - the Government would tax the shit out of it and the license would go up and up and people in the end won't bother. Stupid hairbrained idea. Why penalise people with happy loving fulfilling relationships?

At first I thought the article would propose people having to STAY married for a minimum of 7 years. That's an idea I like in a way, b/c it would make people look harder @ their relationships before entering into that bond & bringing children into it. But the con to that is really believing in your relationship, marrying & then finding yourself unhappy for any number of reasons & being unable to get out.

sounds cool but just being together for that long without marriage is just as good without a 'contract' hangin over your head i can just hear people sayin to themselves:


"one more year....one more year...."

people gotta have learners permits before they get a driver's license. why not have a learner's permit before you get a marriage license?

I like the idea. I'd make it 5.

heybaby said:

oooh I like this too!

This is one of the dumbest ideas I have ever had the misfortune to hear. Why should people in fruitful, happy marriages be punished by having to renew their license? Has the belief in the possibility of a lifelong commitment grown so far-fetched in the minds of people that something like this would really fly? I'm absolutely appalled at the notion. I'm all for people defining relationships in their own way, but the option to sign a once-only marriage license should always exist.

i love the idea!
i also think that women would be against this idea more so than their male counterparts. what do you think?

ronnie said:

maybe people will agree to marry someone maybe they wouldn't otherwise have because it isn't forever

ZombieKitten said:

That's a problem. Why would anyone want to enter into a relationship with the thought of its potential demise in mind?

i agree with superspaceboy, that nothing last forever. why is marriage any different? people grow apart. is that simple. it may not even involve having an affair/cheating/someone else. people grow and different goals and interests are developed during the span of any relationship and, these may or may be supported by your partner.
[Edited 9/22/07 1:26am]

good lord that is so funny

Sounds like a good idea to me.

Mach said:

Co sign. It's a great piece of swiss .

ronnie said:

So the solution is simple... and it's one that's already in place. Get a divorce.

Bottom line, if you let one motherfucker come along and tell you how you should feel about marriage then along comes two or three more to tell you how you should feel about other aspects of life.

No, thank you.

A marriage with a divorce already built in lol...that's beyond ridiculous.

God help us if they ever took the same attitude towards pregnancy.

Getting a divorce is an extremely hard decision...I mean, extremely hard. But if one is what is needed, if that conclusion is reached, then it's a process that MUST be experienced precisely because it IS so difficult a decision. Just because aspects of Life are emotionally and spiritually difficult doesn't mean they should be avoided or made easier...those experiences serve a purpose in our individual development.

Encourage people to really THINK and FEEL with maturity and certainty before getting married...encourage that, promote that. I personally think only about 10% of the adult population should be married, anyway lol ...

Byron said:

amen

Moonbeam said:

That's not what we're saying. We're saying that there is an option to not go on if they don't want to. If they want to keep going on they can decide to renew their vows. THAT I think is a cool thing in and of itself. But I do feel that many times people grow apart and feel the need to move on. Instead of divorcing or cheating or being unhappy, there is the option to part amicably and without the unpleasantries of divorcing or being lied to.

I wanna know
whatever happened to just putting the bitch back in line with a well administered back-handed slap?

Byron said:

See, then there is that. I agree with you. I think the larger issue is maybe what marriage is and isn't about. Some get it. Many don't. It's so ingrained in us that the perfect life MEANS finding the right partner and getting married and living happily ever after, that many don't really think about what they want in life and get married way too soon.

Maybe a better answer could be you can't get married until you are 30. I think that way more people would be more mature about the decision and the path that they want to choose in life. They will have lived a little and seen the world and maybe develop a sense of who they are and what they want out of life. I think some might decide that they never want to be married...as I think with some people, this is a good thing. Maybe more marriages would work.

Byron said:

Agreed. Marriage is intended for mature rationale adults not adults who think of relationship as the equivalent of fast food orders.

Byron said:

Well, I guess I'd add this:

Marriage should be taken the hell out of the legal system, if we really want it to be viewed as a lifetime commitment.

Here are some of the benefits of marriage in the US (sorry for the messy copy/past formatting):

* Right to many of ex- or late spouse's benefits,, including:
o Social Security pension
o veteran's pensions, indemnity compensation for service-connected deaths, medical care, and nursing home care, right to burial in veterans' cemeteries, educational assistance, and housing
o survivor benefits for federal employees
o survivor benefits for spouses of longshoremen, harbor workers, railroad workers
o additional benefits to spouses of coal miners who die of black lung disease
o $100,000 to spouse of any public safety officer killed in the line of duty
o continuation of employer-sponsored health benefits
o renewal and termination rights to spouse's copyrights on death of spouse
o continued water rights of spouse in some circumstances
o payment of wages and workers compensation benefits after worker death
o making, revoking, and objecting to post-mortem anatomical gifts
* Right to benefits while married:
o employment assistance and transitional services for spouses of members being separated from military service; continued commissary privileges
o per diem payment to spouse for federal civil service employees when relocating
o Indian Health Service care for spouses of Native Americans (in some circumstances)
o sponsor husband/wife for immigration benefits
* Larger benefits under some programs if married, including:
o veteran's disability
o Supplemental Security Income
o disability payments for federal employees
o medicaid
o property tax exemption for homes of totally disabled veterans
o income tax deductions, credits, rates exemption, and estimates
* Joint and family-related rights:
o joint filing of bankruptcy permitted
o joint parenting rights, such as access to children's school records
o family visitation rights for the spouse and non-biological children, such as to visit a spouse in a hospital or prison
o next-of-kin status for emergency medical decisions or filing wrongful death claims
o custodial rights to children, shared property, child support, and alimony after divorce
o domestic violence intervention
o access to "family only" services, such as reduced rate memberships to clubs & organizations or residency in certain neighborhoods
* Preferential hiring for spouses of veterans in government jobs
* Tax-free transfer of property between spouses (including on death) and exemption from "due-on-sale" clauses.
* Special consideration to spouses of citizens and resident aliens
* Spouse's flower sales count towards meeting the eligibility for Fresh Cut Flowers and Fresh Cut Greens Promotion and Information Act
* Threats against spouses of various federal employees is a federal crime
* Right to continue living on land purchased from spouse by National Park Service when easement granted to spouse
* Court notice of probate proceedings
* Domestic violence protection orders
* Existing homestead lease continuation of rights
* Regulation of condominium sales to owner-occupants exemption
* Funeral and bereavement leave
* Joint adoption and foster care
* Joint tax filing
* Insurance licenses, coverage, eligibility, and benefits organization of mutual benefits society
* Legal status with stepchildren
* Making spousal medical decisions
* Spousal non-resident tuition deferential waiver
* Permission to make funeral arrangements for a deceased spouse, including burial or cremation
* Right of survivorship of custodial trust
* Right to change surname upon marriage
* Right to enter into prenuptial agreement
* Right to inheritance of property
* Spousal privilege in court cases (the marital confidences privilege and the spousal testimonial privilege)



A belief in lifetime commitment isn't the only, or even the primary, reason that many people get married. This should be changed, if we want people to view marriage the way that you do.