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PrintableI would stay- if you have a connection with the person- what'z fat got to do with it?  Unless the reason why they've put on kilos is cause they sit around watching tv and not really having any convo with me...like a proper convo in oppose to 'what'z for dinner' and 'did you pay that last bill off' kind and all i got was 'shhh...must...watch...t...v  ' ...  then i'd be a bit apprehensive n start thinkin!No hablo espanol,no! 
Pero hablo ingles..ssii muy muy bien... 
 "Come into my world..."
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applekisses said: TonyVanDam said: Sad but true. But what if shallow people are telling the truth? What if they're being too honest about their perferences? a) If they're telling the truth, I think it's a good thing. I'll stay as far away from them as I can and so can other rational, loving people. b) If they're being too honest about their preferences? I don't think there's such a thing as being "too" honest. You're either honest about something or you're not. There are not degrees of honesty, imho. when someone is brutally honest, thats where "degrees of honesty" come in...I know in my life that I have often been accused of being brutally honest, in that I don't sugarcoat or soften the bluntness of true honesty....I'm sure that a lot of folks, at some point in time, have "softened the blow" in giving someone a dose of honesty in order to protect a feeling or two....no less honest, but not as sharp and telling as it should be, que no? He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow.
(George Eliot) the video for the above... 
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ccollin88 said: if your husband, wife, girlfriend,boyfriend, became really out of shape from when you first met them would you stay?
Yes...em-phat-ically....cuz if u don't then it suggests that u can't accept the inevitable ravages of aging..... ...and of course, with my wife being an ORGer and frequent visitor here, I BETTER SAY YEAH!!! Well Trained Soldier and Husband..... He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow.
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lilmissmissy said: I would stay- if you have a connection with the person- what'z fat got to do with it?
Unless the reason why they've put on kilos is cause they sit around watching tv and not really having any convo with me...like a proper convo in oppose to 'what'z for dinner' and 'did you pay that last bill off' kind and all i got was 'shhh...must...watch...t...v ' ... then i'd be a bit apprehensive n start thinkin!But that's not really about the appearance changing but their behavior changing. And it's not about the fat, it's about how they are treating you (not paying attnetion, ignoring for TV, etc.). Which is a bit different. Loads of things can contribute to folks 'letting themselves go' and a big ass or a round belly to me is so silly a thing to break up a relationship over. And if it's depression that caused them to get that way, do we leave them cause they are depressed? If it's stress at work, or an undiagnosed illness? If someone's just going through a rough period, are we just done with them? Don't these things constitute the worse part of for better or worse? Does no one honor commitment anymore? Now, I understand if something like this happens 2 months into a more casual relationship it's quite a bit different. And even if it is a long term, committed relationship, at some point you have to determine what kind of behavior you can and cannot tolerate from a mate. But to throw away love for a few extra pounds? I don't get it. |
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CarrieMpls said: lilmissmissy said: I would stay- if you have a connection with the person- what'z fat got to do with it?
Unless the reason why they've put on kilos is cause they sit around watching tv and not really having any convo with me...like a proper convo in oppose to 'what'z for dinner' and 'did you pay that last bill off' kind and all i got was 'shhh...must...watch...t...v ' ... then i'd be a bit apprehensive n start thinkin!But that's not really about the appearance changing but their behavior changing. And it's not about the fat, it's about how they are treating you (not paying attnetion, ignoring for TV, etc.). Which is a bit different. Loads of things can contribute to folks 'letting themselves go' and a big ass or a round belly to me is so silly a thing to break up a relationship over. And if it's depression that caused them to get that way, do we leave them cause they are depressed? If it's stress at work, or an undiagnosed illness? If someone's just going through a rough period, are we just done with them? Don't these things constitute the worse part of for better or worse? Does no one honor commitment anymore? Now, I understand if something like this happens 2 months into a more casual relationship it's quite a bit different. And even if it is a long term, committed relationship, at some point you have to determine what kind of behavior you can and cannot tolerate from a mate. But to throw away love for a few extra pounds? I don't get it. Well ya know, certainly, i totally agree with you, i would never agree to just leaving a relationship just when the other person is down. I was referring to the act of 'no effort'...in oppose to a personal brick wall another may have fallen into...where they would need another person to support them emotionally. I am reffering to fault in relationship rather than...the other person just hit a bad spot deep down and they need your support. I suppose every situation would be different. Personally i wouldn't leave the person- weight gain is indeed a shallow reason to do so, and i believe that when and if a person behaves so insensitive, they tend to get it back in a bigger way. Then they realise 'oh crap...i suppose i was this awful to somebody else cause of weight gain or *insert any given reason here* so now it's my turn to go through it myself to totally gain the whole experience of what my attitude was and how it effected them' type thing. To leave a person cause of weight gain all of a sudden- you'd hope there was a whole lot more to it than that!  You really would  No hablo espanol,no!
Pero hablo ingles..ssii muy muy bien...
"Come into my world..."
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lilmissmissy said: CarrieMpls said: But that's not really about the appearance changing but their behavior changing. And it's not about the fat, it's about how they are treating you (not paying attnetion, ignoring for TV, etc.). Which is a bit different. Loads of things can contribute to folks 'letting themselves go' and a big ass or a round belly to me is so silly a thing to break up a relationship over. And if it's depression that caused them to get that way, do we leave them cause they are depressed? If it's stress at work, or an undiagnosed illness? If someone's just going through a rough period, are we just done with them? Don't these things constitute the worse part of for better or worse? Does no one honor commitment anymore? Now, I understand if something like this happens 2 months into a more casual relationship it's quite a bit different. And even if it is a long term, committed relationship, at some point you have to determine what kind of behavior you can and cannot tolerate from a mate. But to throw away love for a few extra pounds? I don't get it. Well ya know, certainly, i totally agree with you, i would never agree to just leaving a relationship just when the other person is down. I was referring to the act of 'no effort'...in oppose to a personal brick wall another may have fallen into...where they would need another person to support them emotionally. I am reffering to fault in relationship rather than...the other person just hit a bad spot deep down and they need your support. I suppose every situation would be different. Personally i wouldn't leave the person- weight gain is indeed a shallow reason to do so, and i believe that when and if a person behaves so insensitive, they tend to get it back in a bigger way. Then they realise 'oh crap...i suppose i was this awful to somebody else cause of weight gain or *insert any given reason here* so now it's my turn to go through it myself to totally gain the whole experience of what my attitude was and how it effected them' type thing. To leave a person cause of weight gain all of a sudden- you'd hope there was a whole lot more to it than that! You really would I totally got what you were sayin'. 
And I think someone said it above, if someone's leaving someone for that reason, there must not have been much there to begin with. |
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CalhounSq said: RipHer2Shreds said: If we're talking obese, of course it would living longer. Stop picking my words apart and don't respond to my posts any more. I will file a police report.
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CarrieMpls said: lilmissmissy said: Well ya know, certainly, i totally agree with you, i would never agree to just leaving a relationship just when the other person is down. I was referring to the act of 'no effort'...in oppose to a personal brick wall another may have fallen into...where they would need another person to support them emotionally. I am reffering to fault in relationship rather than...the other person just hit a bad spot deep down and they need your support. I suppose every situation would be different. Personally i wouldn't leave the person- weight gain is indeed a shallow reason to do so, and i believe that when and if a person behaves so insensitive, they tend to get it back in a bigger way. Then they realise 'oh crap...i suppose i was this awful to somebody else cause of weight gain or *insert any given reason here* so now it's my turn to go through it myself to totally gain the whole experience of what my attitude was and how it effected them' type thing. To leave a person cause of weight gain all of a sudden- you'd hope there was a whole lot more to it than that! You really would I totally got what you were sayin'.
And I think someone said it above, if someone's leaving someone for that reason, there must not have been much there to begin with. Oh phew!!
And yeah, precisely!! No hablo espanol,no!
Pero hablo ingles..ssii muy muy bien...
"Come into my world..."
Missy Quote of da Month: "yeah, sure, that's cool...wait WHAT?! " | |
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First off...Carrie, Melissa and Byron...I love you all no matter how many Tim Tams you eat and you know why 
Secondly...GOOD GOD  How horrible it would be to be in what is supposed to be a "death-til-us-part" relationship and constantly be wondering...will he (or she) leave me because...I get pregnant and can't lose the baby weight, I get too many wrinkles, I get breast cancer and become disfigured due to a mastectomy, or lose my hair for the same reason, or become paralyized in a horrible accident or any number or combinations of events or possibities?
That's no way to live, imho...and no way is even close to what I consider true love. If this is the way things are going...God help us all. | |
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Moonbeam said: Anyone who wouldn't doesn't deserve to have a partner anyway.
So I can eat all the chocolates I want in the world?!  --ยปYou're my favourite moment, you're my Saturday... | |
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Their weight gain would be my fault for not burning enough calories off them during sex, so I would just make him work harder. No More Haters on the Internet. | |
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Diva said: Moonbeam said: Anyone who wouldn't doesn't deserve to have a partner anyway.
So I can eat all the chocolates I want in the world?! Not if you want to kiss me.  Feel free to join in the Prince Album Poll 2018! Let'a celebrate his legacy by counting down the most beloved Prince albums, as decided by you! | |
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ccollin88 said: if your husband, wife, girlfriend,boyfriend, became really out of shape from when you first met them would you stay?
yes | |
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I'm waiting for Erin to tone up her arms first. | |
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jerseykrs said: I'm waiting for Erin to tone up her arms first.
But my lunchlady arms are what gives me my sex appeal. | |
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JustErin said: jerseykrs said: I'm waiting for Erin to tone up her arms first.
But my lunchlady arms are what gives me my sex appeal. deepthroating wine bottles works too!!  | |
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jerseykrs said: JustErin said: But my lunchlady arms are what gives me my sex appeal. deepthroating wine bottles works too!! It's not a deepthroat shot! | |
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Tis only a shell!
The best is inside. ^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect, it means you've decided to look beyond the imperfections... unknown | |
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JustErin said: CarrieMpls said: I certainly think we have things we are attracted to and things we are not. I go gaga over men I think are cute, of course. But I think what we're talking about here is 'sexual' attraction vs. 'physical' attraction. To me, they are not one and the same. I can totally be sexually attracted to someone who may never have caught my eye physically. But as you get to know someone, the other traits about them attract you to a point where the physical can very much become attractive to you, even if it wasn't at first. And here we're also talking about someon with whom you are already in a relationship with. And when you're truly deeply in love with someone, I just can't imagine losing that sexual attraction, regrdless of some extra pounds, a disfiguring accident, losing their hair, what have you. Sure, long term relationships are going to have ups and downs, that's to be expected. But I just can't imagine falling out of love and therefore losing my sexual attraction with someone over appearance. It just doesn't click with me. Yes, I see what you are saying. I can understand how that can happen. For me, physical attraction and sexual attraction are the same. My x-bf was in a serious motorcycle accident and royally messed himself up and I stayed with him because, even tho he was a total mess, I was still physically attracted to him (we eventually grew apart because other reasons). But had I no longer felt physically attracted to him I would have ended the romantic side of things and stayed close friends. My love for him would not end. I just do not wish to be with someone that I am not attracted to. To do that would be settling, imo. In fact, even though we are no longer together, we are still very, very close and care deeply for each other and really still do love each other. Is it more acceptable that other things besides a physical attraction ended our romance? Does it mean that I never experienced love simply because it ended? I don't sure as hell don't think so. Love doesn't always conquer all, folks and to think it does, in my honest opinion is just being naive. But that's just how I see things. It doesn't conquer all, but it should conquer more than just a few extra pounds.  | |
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applekisses said: JustErin said: Yes, I see what you are saying. I can understand how that can happen. For me, physical attraction and sexual attraction are the same. My x-bf was in a serious motorcycle accident and royally messed himself up and I stayed with him because, even tho he was a total mess, I was still physically attracted to him (we eventually grew apart because other reasons). But had I no longer felt physically attracted to him I would have ended the romantic side of things and stayed close friends. My love for him would not end. I just do not wish to be with someone that I am not attracted to. To do that would be settling, imo. In fact, even though we are no longer together, we are still very, very close and care deeply for each other and really still do love each other. Is it more acceptable that other things besides a physical attraction ended our romance? Does it mean that I never experienced love simply because it ended? I don't sure as hell don't think so. Love doesn't always conquer all, folks and to think it does, in my honest opinion is just being naive. But that's just how I see things. It doesn't conquer all, but it should conquer more than just a few extra pounds. And I'm sure it does for most people. I personally wouldn't care about a few extra pounds...but if I were to become unattracted to my partner at some point for whatever reason, I would not want to stay romantically involved. | |
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sag10 said: Tis only a shell!
The best is inside.  | |
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I had something to say...really I did...  | |
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Byron said: I had something to say...really I did...
i don't believe you
| |
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AndGodCreatedMe said: Byron said: I had something to say...really I did...
i don't believe you
I did...  | |
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Byron said:[quote] AndGodCreatedMe said: i don't believe you
I did... [/quote
orgnote  | |
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Well people are dumb for vowing to stick with a person forever no matter what happens. As much as people like to deny it, looks are important. If they weren't women would not wear makeup, or dress up, or get their hair done, etc, etc. If a girl i was with let her self go and gained weight i would be dumping her ass. I am not attracted to that and you can't help what you are attracted to. | |
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