The Onion: Prince Declared "Provisionally Cool"

From http://www.theonion.com:

U.S. Council Of Coolness Releases Formal Statement On Prince

WASHINGTON, DC—On Monday, the U.S. Council of Coolness released its long-awaited ruling on Prince, declaring the recording artist "provisionally cool" by a 13-11 margin. "This was a more difficult decision than it should have been," the 240-page report read. "In the end, however, albums like 1999 and Sign O' The Times are sufficiently brilliant to offset such padded late-period dorkfests as Rave Un2 The Joy Fantastic and The Rainbow Children." The Council of Coolness warned that the decision could be reversed if Prince records one more rap in which he declares himself "super-fonky" or "2 jammin' 4 U."

Jarret said:

the onion: +22

this article: somewhere in the red...

I love TRC! Why I oughta...

"Provisionally Cool". Is that like the "Provisional IRA"?

I too enjoy TRC. I also thought Rave had some good moments. My favorite of the last decade though has got to be Gold (minus Pussy Control; fair song that didn't match the album). What a shame Gold didn't get more attention.

As for the rap, I tend to agree. I never liked most of Prince's rap except for Dead On It which WAS Dead On It.

Peace

"Negros from Brooklyn play the Bass pretty good but the ones from MPLS play it like it outta should!" (So do PRs from where ever!)

The Onion makes me pee, that is too funny.



But I must protest that TRC is supercool and definately FONKY!

You should really read The Onion's story on how George Clinton threatens to drop da bomb on Iraq. It's hilarious and once again topical!

http://www.theonion.com/o...abomb.html
[This message was edited Wed Feb 12 3:35:18 PST 2003 by Edance]

The Onion was cool years ago. Anyone who thinks a Council of Coolness is actually cool needs to stop drinking spiked kool-aid.

wow aerogram, cranky this morn'?
as for the artical...

but wouldn't that be spiked 'cool-aid'?

hehehe. i love the onion. too bad they had to move to NY city. madison's 10x cooler

that was cute

"dorkfests"

Too damn funny! You gotta love the Onion!

Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9)

Just checked out The Onion for the first time. Very funny news items! LOL
Thanks.

Yeah, I love the Clinton drops da bomb on Iraq story! Hilarious.

Gotta luv the zany Onion...

Edance said:

Aerogram said:

Really...have a sense of humor folks. That's funny shit.

I recoiled at some of the "fam" reactions after I posted this...then I thought to myself, honestly, would I still be posting it if they had declared him UNcool?

Yeah, probably. That Council of Coolness is all bullsh!t anyway, man! Bunch of nay-sayers!

They shouldn't have slammed TRC!

But seriously, it has nothing to do with Prince. I always thought the notion of "cool" was -- get this --- deeply superficial.

rofl! When I first read the caption to this thread, I thought it meant that Prince was declaring onions as cool. Hey where is that orger who used to have that passion for onions? What was her name? Paige Turner or something like that? She would appreciate this story.

Aerogram said:

"Shake yer reptile, baby!"

Haha...funny stuff. But TRC is not a bad album, despite the cheesy storyline. Musically, it´s one of the best albums Prince ever did. Rave would have been nice if played by a NPG band.

I agree with Psychodelicide- I kinda thought to myself, "why the hell would Prince come out officially to declare his love for onions?" Then I remembered there is a publication called "The Onion"- shows how much I pay attention to The Onion, huh? Anyhow, I thought the Iraq thing was cute. Prince is and always will be "cool" if you want to put a label on it, but I choose not to. I am very fond of Prince's character, and I really like TRC, because it has a valid message, which most magazines and media will pass up unless the songs include messages of clothes/shoes/fashion, parties, drugs/alcohol, sex, violence, or other method of pacifying the public.


But I did laugh at the "Funkentelecommucications towers being guarded by atomic dogs"...





JD

lol cool hmmm i'd like to see them play a guitar even 1/4 as good as he can.. and umm how many other insturments? the way i see it prince has new direction in life and i am looking foward to it all his music is BEAUTIFUL, as clapton once said ..sometimes we create the music for us!lol and people still buy the jams RIGHT?
PEACE!!!