http://gawker.com/5886988...-elizabeth

The Believer's Guide

What is the Illuminati?
The Illuminati is an ancient and shadowy group of elites who control nearly every aspect of life on this planet — from finance and government to religion and culture.

Who is in the Illuminati?
The Illuminati is made up of the world's political and financial elite, and also, rappers. Theoretically, membership rolls are kept secret, but most YouTube intellectuals agree that the following people are members:

• Barack Obama
• the Pope
• Queen Elizabeth II
• George Soros
• Ben Bernanke
• George W. Bush
• Jay-Z
• Kanye West
• Rihanna
• Bob Dylan
• Beyoncé
• Lady Gaga
• Jim Carrey
• Willow Smith

What do the Illuminati do?
Oh, you know, conspiracy stuff. Assassinations, currency manipulation, Super Bowl halftime shows. All executed through puppet institutions and groups like the Federal Reserve, the Council on Foreign Relations, the Freemasons, and Def Jam Recordings. And all carefully controlled and hidden to ensure that their meddling in world affairs will remain secret.

This is sounding more plausible by the minute. What's the end goal of the Illuminati?
The end goal of the Illuminati is to establish a one-world authoritarian government known as the New World Order.

...and then?
Here, theories differ. Some of the internet's finest minds, writing on scholarly websites like Yahoo Answers, believe that forced conversion to homosexuality will be a top agenda item in the New World Order. Others claim the first order of business will be to round all non-Illuminati up into FEMA camps, possibly as part of a deal struck with aliens in Roswell. Many, if not most, experts believe that the New World Order will be a front for the rise of the Antichrist.

The Antichrist?
Yes. The Illuminati is made up of Satanists.

Even the Pope?
I can see how it's confusing. The Pope is actually a Satanist, just like Jay-Z and the Queen of England. (He might even be the Antichrist.) They also worship ancient Babylonian demons, and keep them trapped inside the Pentagon, which is why it's, you know, pentagonal.

Okay. How can I tell who's in the Illuminati?
I know this sounds counterintuitive, but prominent Illuminati members frequently flag their Illuminati connections. Like how in Lady Gaga's "Born This Way" video, there's that goat head-shaped star formation? Or have you ever seen Jay-Z's video for "On to the Next One"? It has a goat skull in it. Goats, bro.

Goat heads are an Illuminati symbol?
Goat heads represents Baphomet, the goat-headed god beloved by 19th-century occultists. It's not the only weird occult reference in "On to the Next One." The creepy guy with the crow, Jay throwing devil horns, the, uh, actual Masonic symbol — all of Hov's (that's right: Hov) videos are filled with Illuminati an... symbolism. So are Lady Gaga's: that pink triangle and unicorn that you thought was some campy gay reference? Actually symbols of the i...conception of a new order of humanity. So are Kanye's videos, especially "Power." I mean, they're all in the Illuminati, and if you're a member of a global satanic conspiracy, why not show it off on MTV?

Next you're going to tell me that Madonna's Super Bowl halftime show was a Satanic ritual.
[rolls eyes, sighs exasperatedly] Uh, hello? Obviously? The color scheme was red and black. She had horns on her helmet. The show happened within 48 hours of the full moon. Her male dancers formed a pyramid, a Masonic symbol. It ended with the phrase "World Peace" — as in, "New World Order Peace." And LMFAO was there.

LMFAO is Illuminati?
Can you think of any other reason for their success?

But why would the Illuminati hold a Satanic ritual during the biggest television even of the year?
Obviously, to celebrate the upcoming assassination of Whitney Houston.

The Illuminati killed Whitney Houston? But... why?
For two reasons: one, to celebrate the Diamond Jub... Elizabeth, and two, to make room in the Illuminati for Blue Ivy Carter.

Who else have the Illuminati killed?
Oh, you name it — J.F.K., 2Pac, Bob Marley, Michael Jackson. Heath Ledger's death was a ritualistic sacrifice. Aaliyah was killed by Dame Dash so he could become famous.

Wow. That makes sense.
I know.

I really feel like I've learned a lot from this guide. Where can I learn more about the Illuminati?
I highly recommend reading the very factual Behold a Pale Horse and The Biggest Secret — but you can also find a lot of information on such rigorous and learned websites as Godlike Productions, Vigilant Citizen, Above Top Secret and Prison Planet, the website of Austin radio host Alex Jones. Finally, of course, a great deal of important information is distributed on Twitter, YouTube, and Yahoo Answers.

The Skeptic's Guide

What is the Illuminati?
A defunct German secret society of freethinkers, humanists and Enlightenment academics, founded in 1776 and infiltrated and shut down by Bavarian authorities about a decade later.

There hasn't been an Illuminati in 200 years?
Well, it's been in use as a conspiracy theory ever since it was first founded, mostly by monarchists, right-wingers, and religious Christians looking for explanations as to why things aren't going their way.

So who believes in the Illuminati?
Generally speaking, Ron Paul voters, people who are in militias, washed-up rappers, teenage R&B fans on Twitter, and that one guy from high school who is always posting links to Erowid "experiences" to Facebook.

That's kind of a broad range of people, isn't it?
Yeah. Weird, huh?

I don't get it. If it's this right-wing Christian conspiracy, how do rappers start believing in it?
That's kind of the million-dollar question. Columbia professor Marc Lamont Hill says that conspiracy theories are a natural response by African-Americans to their disenfranchisement: "There have always been questions and conspiracies about the structure and nature of power by African-Americans, and naturally those questions have made their way into hip-hop," he told the Philadelphia Weekly in 2010. "[In the 1990s] people were going to black book stores... and buying books like Behold a Pale Horse... They were talking about the Illuminati and the Rothschilds and Bilderbergs."

So Alex Jones and Prodigy were reading the same fucked-up conspiracy books? That's wild, man.
Dude, Prodigy is going to to vote for Ron Paul.

This is pretty nuts. Can I read more about it somewhere?
Yeah — here's a good Philadelphia Weekly story about the rap Illuminati phenomenon. Here's a Slate column about pop music and Illuminati. Here's an XXL timeline of Illuminat... rap music. The New Yorker has a really awesome long article about conspi... from 1995, but it's subscriber only. Animal has been tracking the Illuminati for years. And this was my favorite book...igh school, though it's unfortunately out of print.

Yo, while we're here, can we talk about reptoids?
No.

You surely are one of them too

That's the worst hit piece I've ever read. Alex Jones says some very valid things. The Obama Deception is a great video. What's weird is I don't think I've ever heard him refer to "the illuminati". He talks about the "New World Order" which if you watch TOD and understand what he means by that you'd realize it's perfectly valid.

I don't like this whole pop culturization of Illuminati. There's real, clandestine, power-hungry people out there that do pull real strings and putting that concept next to something like "Willow Smith" or "Rihanna" is just insulting. None of those bimbo pop starlets know shit about it and frankly anyone who has the capabilities of a true Illuminati wouldn't need to invest in half that shit.

I guess I shouldn't expect deep, true, real research by Gawker. These articles do nothing to prove the case, rather it simply aids in tearing it all to pieces by making a comedy out of it. Horns and hand gestures? Get out of here.

Look at the bankers, politicians, and financiers whom have underwritten The Fed or people who have controlled the wars and how our countries communicate during those wars. Quit looking for signs of the Illuminati in pop culture. Its fetishistic, not factual.

And yeah I know this is stupid satire, but still. There's unexplained stuff that goes back for a century and it's funny that people poke fun at it mainly because that's precisely what they would want you to do. I'm no paranoiac, but let's be honest - when it comes to a ruling class, there is one, and there ain't a damn thing civilians can do about it.

DarlingDiana said:

That's the worst hit piece I've ever read. Alex Jones says some very valid things. The Obama Deception is a great video. What's weird is I don't think I've ever heard him refer to "the illuminati". He talks about the "New World Order" which if you watch TOD and understand what he means by that you'd realize it's perfectly valid.

I highly recommand far more superior guides:

[Edited 2/28/12 19:03pm]

TonyVanDam said:

I highly recommand far more superior guides:

[Edited 2/28/12 19:03pm]

No illuminati post is complete without you, I see. I may check these books out Not sure about the idiots guide to the illuminati

So who believes in the Illuminati?
Generally speaking, Ron Paul voters,

DarlingDiana said:

That's the worst hit piece I've ever read. Alex Jones says some very valid things. The Obama Deception is a great video. What's weird is I don't think I've ever heard him refer to "the illuminati". He talks about the "New World Order" which if you watch TOD and understand what he means by that you'd realize it's perfectly valid.

I'm sorry, but

Those that know.....KNOW.

Those that don't laugh.

Beautifulstarr123 said:

TonyVanDam said:

I highly recommand far more superior guides:

I more highly recommend to check on the backgrounds of the authors you highly recommend.

Graycap23 said:

Those that know.....KNOW.

Those that don't laugh.

Oooh, very cloak and dagger. You have inside info, do tell?

I mean, "knowing" and choosing to believe what others have postulated are two very different things aren't they. So. What do you KNOW?

lust said:

Graycap23 said:

Those that know.....KNOW.

Those that don't laugh.

Oooh, very cloak and dagger. You have inside info, do tell?

I mean, "knowing" and choosing to believe what others have postulated are two very different things aren't they. So. What do you KNOW?

Read 10 pages of the book, "the committee of 300".

U can find it online 4 free in pdf form.

Graycap23 said:

lust said:

Oooh, very cloak and dagger. You have inside info, do tell?

I mean, "knowing" and choosing to believe what others have postulated are two very different things aren't they. So. What do you KNOW?

Read 10 pages of the book, "the committee of 300".

U can find it online 4 free in pdf form.

Okay, I'll check it out. What was your involvement though or did you just read it?

Graycap23 said:

lust said:

Oooh, very cloak and dagger. You have inside info, do tell?

I mean, "knowing" and choosing to believe what others have postulated are two very different things aren't they. So. What do you KNOW?

Read 10 pages of the book, "the committee of 300".

U can find it online 4 free in pdf form.

Why is it that anytime I look up anything on the Illuminati it's on some shitty unintelligible website?

Any links to any good websites?

Graycap23 said:

lust said:

Oooh, very cloak and dagger. You have inside info, do tell?

I mean, "knowing" and choosing to believe what others have postulated are two very different things aren't they. So. What do you KNOW?

Read 10 pages of the book, "the committee of 300".

U can find it online 4 free in pdf form.

I read the first page and found this paragraph interesting. So it's a gay plot? Okay, I better keep my back to the wall from now on. Thanks for the tip.

I pursued my investigations, pressing on in the face of severe risks, attacks on myself and my wife,

financial losses, continual harassment, threats and calumny, all part of a carefully crafted and

orchestrated program to discredit me, run by government agents and informers, embedded in the socalled

Christian right-wing, the "Identity Movement" and right-wing "patriotic" groups. These

agents operated, and still operate, under cover of strong and fearless outspoken opposition to

Judaism their main enemy, they would have us believe. These agent-informers are led and controlled

by a group of

conservatives all across the United States.

RodeoSchro said:

So who believes in the Illuminati?
Generally speaking, Ron Paul voters,

DarlingDiana said:

That's the worst hit piece I've ever read. Alex Jones says some very valid things. The Obama Deception is a great video. What's weird is I don't think I've ever heard him refer to "the illuminati". He talks about the "New World Order" which if you watch TOD and understand what he means by that you'd realize it's perfectly valid.

I'm sorry, but

What did you expect? That anti-government, anti-establishment conspiracy theories wouldn't appeal to me?

But as I said, I don't believe in "The Illuminati" as it's described in the hit piece. No one does. But do I believe those with power and influence use their power and influence to get more power and influence? Of course.

I have to agree with Spinlight, the illuminati where a group of intelligent men. Scientists, doctors etc. Why would they fuck with Jay-Z or Lady GaGa?

Why would they waste time putting symbols in music videos that no one will catch unless your into illuminati stuff? i don't see people going out and commiting violent acts because of the ''supposed'' symbols in the video.

To me Illuminati talk is as mainstrem as a Rihanna song now......

Blue Ivy Carter: Why Did Beyonce And Jay-Z Choose That Name?

K I love the idea of the Queen of England calling for Whitney's head on a platter as a gift.

lust said:

DarlingDiana said:

That's the worst hit piece I've ever read. Alex Jones says some very valid things. The Obama Deception is a great video. What's weird is I don't think I've ever heard him refer to "the illuminati". He talks about the "New World Order" which if you watch TOD and understand what he means by that you'd realize it's perfectly valid.

Alex Jones is a grade A lunatic. A joke that diserves nothing but ridicule. But as Obi Wan said, "whose the bigger fool? the fool or the fool who follows him?"

Have you ever read Jon Ronson's 'Them - Adventures with Extremists?' Jones makes a few appearances in it, and comes across as someone who cannot tell the difference between things that are real and things that are not real. He may have some valid comments, but his 'interpretation' of Bohemian Grove ("A pagan ceremony worshiping the earth and engaging in human sacrific!") was definitely not reality based.

[Edited 3/1/12 4:47am]

who's next to be lifted up by the illuminati?

Cover of March' Vogue magazine.

note the similiar facial expression and pose of nicki minaj and aaliyah. note the blue skin on nicki.

is her color in tribute to baby blue ivy? bbl to add more.

VIOLETBLUEEYES said

Aaliyah and Dame Dash

[Edited 3/1/12 12:04pm]

V10LETBLUES said:

Graycap23 said:

Read 10 pages of the book, "the committee of 300".

U can find it online 4 free in pdf form.

Why is it that anytime I look up anything on the Illuminati it's on some shitty unintelligible website?

Any links to any good websites?

Do u honestly think these folks are going 2 make it easy 4 u 2 find out it's activities 4 the last few hundred years?

damosuzuki said:

lust said:

Alex Jones is a grade A lunatic. A joke that diserves nothing but ridicule. But as Obi Wan said, "whose the bigger fool? the fool or the fool who follows him?"

Have you ever read Jon Ronson's 'Them - Adventures with Extremists?' Jones makes a few appearances in it, and comes across as someone who cannot tell the difference between things that are real and things that are not real. He may have some valid comments, but his 'interpretation' of Bohemian Grove ("A pagan ceremony worshiping the earth and engaging in human sacrific!") was definitely not reality based.

[Edited 3/1/12 4:47am]

If the Bohemian Grove is not real, then so is the Bilderberg meetings, but I'll dig further. What valid points did he make in his book or is it best for me to read it for myself?

DarlingDiana said:

RodeoSchro said:

So who believes in the Illuminati?
Generally speaking, Ron Paul voters,

I'm sorry, but

What did you expect? That anti-government, anti-establishment conspiracy theories wouldn't appeal to me?

But as I said, I don't believe in "The Illuminati" as it's described in the hit piece. No one does. But do I believe those with power and influence use their power and influence to get more power and influence? Of course.

I just found it funny that they referenced Ron Paul voters and then there you were.

I think you're too smart to believe in any of that rigamarole.

This is most interesting: http://www.whale.to/b/spr...rmula.html

The Illuminati Formula Us...lled Slave

free2bfreeda said:

This is most interesting: http://www.whale.to/b/spr...rmula.html

The Illuminati Formula Us...lled Slave

Never trust a webpage with animated gifs and missing plugins that it prompts you to download.

V10LETBLUES said:

free2bfreeda said:

This is most interesting: http://www.whale.to/b/spr...rmula.html

The Illuminati Formula Us...lled Slave

Never trust a webpage with animated gifs and missing plugins that it prompts you to download.

so anyway just click on

The Illuminati Formula Us...lled Slave

there's a list of titles that require no download such as

1: THE SELECTION & PREPARATION OF THE VICTIM
2: THE TRAUMATIZATION & TORTURE OF THE VICTIM
3. THE USE OF DRUGS
4. The Use of Hypnosis
5. The Skill of Lying, The Art of Deceit
6. The Use of Electricity & Electronics
7. Engineering & Structuring Of An MPD System
8. Body Manipulation & Programming
9. Mind Manipulation by Psychological Programming Methods: Behavior Modification, Psychological Motivation, NLP
10. Spiritual Control Techniques, Possession, Trances, Etc. A. Using spiritual principles against a person
11. Internal Controls
12. External Controls

just click on above chapter of your choice.

thx 4 ur warning.