Okay, so I'm gonna rattle this off. If it comes out as a mess, that's okay. I feel rambly when it comes to last weekend, so it will be fitting.

First off, the tickets. I knew from the second they announced tour dates that I had to be at the Chicago show. Some of my favorite people in the world were going to be there, plus I knew I'd have to be willing to travel if I wanted to see her on this tour. She never comes to Detroit anymore.

After the ticket fiasco, I knew I would have to go through 'alternative sources'. But I'm used to this by now. A few weeks ago, I bid on a set of tickets but lost in the last 20 seconds and I had been winning for quite a while. The next day I was contacted from the seller telling me that the winner hadn't paid in a timely manner and he offered me a 'Second Chance Auction'. Sweet! During weeks of searching for orchestra pit seats, I came up with nothing as good as these for the combination of location and price. Thanks to Nikki for helping me make this happen. Couldn't have done it without you!

Things got a little strange later on. On my drive out to Chicago on Friday I received a call from my partner in crime Nikki notifying me that the seller was trying to change plans. He's from South Bend and was going to meet me at the Will Call window to exchange tickets. He notified us via Ebay that he wanted to see if Ticketmaster would allow him to just drop off the tickets for me. Well, it's called Will Call for a reason! Luckily when he called Ticketmaster, they gave him a flat out NO. But I was already a little worried.

My next conversation with him went something like...

Me: So, are we still on to meet around 7 o'clock tomorrow.

Dude: Yeah. But this is how it's going to go down...

Me: Okay?

Dude: You're not gonna talk. Don't say how much you paid for your tickets. Just act like you know me and that we're cool. I'll handle shit. Just stand there. I've got everything under control.

Me: Well, that's kinda what I planned on.

Dude: Good. Just let me deal with the details.

Me: Alright. See you tomorrow. Thanks.

My panic level raised a few notches at this point. The kid had a 99% approval raiting on Ebay, but still. You'd think we were trying to pull off a bank robbery or something. Plus, he sounded constantly stoned. Who was I dealing with?

The next day I got a call from him at around 5pm while Anx, Endo and I were sitting down for a lovely Thai dinner.

Here's how it went:

Dude: Hey, it's me.

Me: Hi!

Dude: Okay, so I'm here in Chicago. I'm sitting in my car in the parking garage across from the venue. But I'm just gonna stay in my car until you get here cuz it's freezing outside and I didn't bring a jacket.

Me: That's fine. Is it okay if I meet up with you in a few hours?

Dude: Yeah, cuz Will Call doesn't even open til then.

Me: That works. See you soon!

We finished our dinner. Ivy picked us up. We waited for the rest of our friends to arrive. And I got my next call...

Dude: Hey, are you there yet?

Me: Yup! Just got here.

Dude: I'll be there soon. But I've gotta wait for a guy to bring by an extra ticket. I'll explain later. But you might not be able to get in without it.

Me: How come?

Dude: I'll explain later.

Me: Okay. I'll be here.



What have I gotten myself into? This next part is where it gets really interesting...

Dude: Hey, I'm here. I'm wearing the blue shorts.

(I turn around and see a kid wearing board shorts, a wifebeater and flip flops on a 40 degree, windy night in Chicago.)

Me: I see you! Bye.

Dude: Alright, this is how it happens...

I'm gonna give your friend this extra ticket. She's gonna go in the place and wait for us. You're going to stay with me. I'll get our tickets. We'll go in together. I'll swap the good seats for the one your friend has. Then I'll leave.

(So I can't help but notice that this kid looks EXACTLY like Steve-O from Jackass. Like exactly. And his pupils are as big as his eyes. I'm pretty sure my suspicions about him being constantly stoned are true. He had trouble making eye contact and was always looking over his shoulder.)

Me: Why?

Dude: Well, they're being really strict. As soon as you pick up your tickets, they make you go into the venue. And there is no re-entry. That's why they opened up the line so late, to prevent stuff like this.

Me: You think it will work?

Dude: You better hope so.

(So Ivy gets the extra ticket, looks at me like "What the fuck am I doing with this 2nd balcony shit? I didn't pay for this!" I agree with her. But we had no other choice I suppose. She enters the venue. Steve-O and I get in line.)

Will Call lady: Do you have your ID?

Dude: ID? Umm, I don't know.

Will Call lady: Well, you'll need it to get your tickets.

Dude: Oh yes, here it is! (sound of velcro pocket opening)

Will Call lady: Here you go. Enjoy the show.

(We enter, he gives me the good tickets and I meet up with Ivy. He's already on his way out.)

Me: Do you want your other ticket back?

Dude: No, it's no good to me now.

Me: Okay, well thank you!

(By then he was already gone. I drop the extra ticket on the ground in case someone has a use for it, meet up with the rest of my friends and prepare for the insanity to follow...)

Man, I thought I had a roller-coaster ride with my Madonna Tokyo ticket I bought on ebay, that was nothing compared to YOUR situation!! Glad it worked out in the end!

i saw the scalper dude and GFam is spot on: i was waiting for a camera crew from COPS to chase him through the lobby any second.

Anxiety said:

Oh Lord, it was harrowing! If anything had gone wrong, I probably would've had an emotional breakdown right then and there.

CandaceS said:

What happened?

GangstaFam said:

it was tense for all of us. i wanted to eavesdrop, but i was afraid steve-o would think i was plainclothes or something.

Anxiety said:

Sorry to have you all worried!

I think your awesome optical illusion/color blindness test shirt could be misconstrued as an undercover trying really hard to blend into a group of people that don't blend in. Or something. I'm just trying to imagine it from Steve-O's perspective.

That ticket story is crazy. I did tickets on ebay twice and both were mailed to me. That was a big chance you took with the will call thing. I don't like meeting the sleazy people from whom I buy tickets.

sextonseven said:

I guess I just realized that I don't either.

One nice thing I can say about Steve-O is that he wasted $75 on an unusable ticket to make sure I got to see the show.

Positive feedback!

GangstaFam said:

That's weird. Are you sure he paid for those tickets?

sextonseven said:

I have no idea really. But for as worried as he was and as paranoid as he made me, he didn't let me down.

He definitely went out of his way to make it happen, even if he went overboard with the warnings and precautions.

And btw, the Virgin Festival in Toronto is a no go for me. I was recently informed that I have a very important family function to attend here in NYC on September 8th.

sextonseven said:

Oh no! You're breaking my heart!

GangstaFam said:

Sorry, but it can't be helped. I became an uncle for the first time today and the christening is on the 8th. I kinda have to be there.

sextonseven said:

Congrats. Now bring the baby to Bjork!

That ticket story sounds creepy. Good thing Queensryche wasn't there.

Moonbeam said:

I would've turned right around and gone home.

GangstaFam said:

The boa bitch boyfriend isn't much better!

Moonbeam said:

I think just about anything is better.

GangstaFam said:

Having to sit with them at that table for the Prince show was truly awful!

Let me just say how cool I think it is that this thread was such a success. Loves it!

Down the corridor...I send worms, I send worms.
Down the staircase...I send worms, I send worms.
It was the drugs, I swear.

MoonSongs said:

The thing is, it's just as believable this way. It's the cutest thing!

GangstaFam said:

And I haven't even gotten the album yet!

sextonseven said:

there's a NEW ALBUM?!?!

Anxiety said:

As far as I'm concerned, there isn't until the surround sound edition is released.

sextonseven said:

spoiled!

GangstaFam said:

NO SPOILERS!!!