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Criteria to be Met in Order to Be Able to Listen to The Cure's Music Not just anyone can listen to The Cure. To be able to listen to The Cure's music without catastrophic and life-threatening side effects occurring it is first necessary to fulfil the following conditions:
* You must be suffering from major depression, preferably in conjunction with chronic alcoholism. * You need to be an active member of the exclusive Goth subculture. * You must be a believer in the philosophical theory of existentialism, believing all existence is totally meaningless and the only things you can believe in is angst and despair. [Note: as the emotion of angst has been copyrighted by Goths, you need to hold an active Goth license before you can believe in it, otherwise you may be sued. It is mistaken believed that Emos are also allowed angst, but in actuality the Emo form of angst is an illegally rip-off.] * You should have written lots of really bad, depressing poetry, bemoaning the futility of existence and forced the people who used to beyour friends, before you made them read your poetry, to read them all. If you can answer "yes" to all of the above you are ready to listen to The Cure, although chances are you probably already are anyway. 
source: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/The_Cure | |
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miguelbulcao said: Not just anyone can listen to The Cure. To be able to listen to The Cure's music without catastrophic and life-threatening side effects occurring it is first necessary to fulfil the following conditions:
* You must be suffering from major depression, preferably in conjunction with chronic alcoholism. * You need to be an active member of the exclusive Goth subculture. * You must be a believer in the philosophical theory of existentialism, believing all existence is totally meaningless and the only things you can believe in is angst and despair. [Note: as the emotion of angst has been copyrighted by Goths, you need to hold an active Goth license before you can believe in it, otherwise you may be sued. It is mistaken believed that Emos are also allowed angst, but in actuality the Emo form of angst is an illegally rip-off.] * You should have written lots of really bad, depressing poetry, bemoaning the futility of existence and forced the people who used to beyour friends, before you made them read your poetry, to read them all. If you can answer "yes" to all of the above you are ready to listen to The Cure, although chances are you probably already are anyway.
source: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/The_Cure I don't qualify  It is not known why FuNkeNsteiN capitalizes his name as he does, though some speculate sunlight deficiency caused by the most pimpified white guy afro in Nordic history.
- Lammastide | |
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i love the cure but dont meet any of these criteria. maybe this is why i always get spat on when i go to cure shows | |
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But The Cure aren't goth. Mopey, yes. Goth, no. | |
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Beyour...
isnt that Beyonce's first born's name? i like... Space for sale... | |
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That's funny. I was listening to the Cure yesterday and I don't meet any of the qualifications...  | |
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miguelbulcao said: Not just anyone can listen to The Cure. To be able to listen to The Cure's music without catastrophic and life-threatening side effects occurring it is first necessary to fulfil the following conditions:
* You must be suffering from major depression, preferably in conjunction with chronic alcoholism. * You need to be an active member of the exclusive Goth subculture. * You must be a believer in the philosophical theory of existentialism, believing all existence is totally meaningless and the only things you can believe in is angst and despair. [Note: as the emotion of angst has been copyrighted by Goths, you need to hold an active Goth license before you can believe in it, otherwise you may be sued. It is mistaken believed that Emos are also allowed angst, but in actuality the Emo form of angst is an illegally rip-off.] * You should have written lots of really bad, depressing poetry, bemoaning the futility of existence and forced the people who used to beyour friends, before you made them read your poetry, to read them all. If you can answer "yes" to all of the above you are ready to listen to The Cure, although chances are you probably already are anyway.
source: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/The_Cure now ain't this some bullshit. consider the gothy gloom in a lyric like "you're so perfect, you're so right as rain/kiss you from your feet to where your head begins". that's a suicide note right there, is what that is. 
you're worse than my mom! | |
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Anx said: miguelbulcao said: Not just anyone can listen to The Cure. To be able to listen to The Cure's music without catastrophic and life-threatening side effects occurring it is first necessary to fulfil the following conditions:
* You must be suffering from major depression, preferably in conjunction with chronic alcoholism. * You need to be an active member of the exclusive Goth subculture. * You must be a believer in the philosophical theory of existentialism, believing all existence is totally meaningless and the only things you can believe in is angst and despair. [Note: as the emotion of angst has been copyrighted by Goths, you need to hold an active Goth license before you can believe in it, otherwise you may be sued. It is mistaken believed that Emos are also allowed angst, but in actuality the Emo form of angst is an illegally rip-off.] * You should have written lots of really bad, depressing poetry, bemoaning the futility of existence and forced the people who used to beyour friends, before you made them read your poetry, to read them all. If you can answer "yes" to all of the above you are ready to listen to The Cure, although chances are you probably already are anyway.
source: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/The_Cure now ain't this some bullshit. consider the gothy gloom in a lyric like "you're so perfect, you're so right as rain/kiss you from your feet to where your head begins". that's a suicide note right there, is what that is.
you're worse than my mom! | |
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Anx said:[quote]miguelbulcao said:[quote]Not just anyone can listen to The Cure. To be able to listen to The Cure's music without catastrophic and life-threatening side effects occurring it is first necessary to fulfil the following conditions:
* You must be suffering from major depression, preferably in conjunction with chronic alcoholism. * You need to be an active member of the exclusive Goth subculture. * You must be a believer in the philosophical theory of existentialism, believing all existence is totally meaningless and the only things you can believe in is angst and despair. [Note: as the emotion of angst has been copyrighted by Goths, you need to hold an active Goth license before you can believe in it, otherwise you may be sued. It is mistaken believed that Emos are also allowed angst, but in actuality the Emo form of angst is an illegally rip-off.] * You should have written lots of really bad, depressing poetry, bemoaning the futility of existence and forced the people who used to beyour friends, before you made them read your poetry, to read them all. If you can answer "yes" to all of the above you are ready to listen to The Cure, although chances are you probably already are anyway. The only thing that causes me to be depressed is someone putting rules on what we can listen to, what art we can enjoy. Hall & Oates, Prince and The Cure are my favorite artists because they are so imaginative, creative and musical. I find the assumptions both offensive and ignorant. I'm surprised you could listen to Prince without the fear of what labels might be stuck on you. Goodluck with that...can't be easy. | |
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^ wow, a humorless cure fan! whoodathunkit? | |
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theghostoftonym said: ^ wow, a humorless cure fan! whoodathunkit?
what if they're commenting on something that isn't even that funny to begin with? what next, a thread on how you have to be gay to listen to barbra streisand (and OMGLOL her nose is big)?! cuttting edge stuff, folx.  | |
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theghostoftonym said: ^ wow, a humorless cure fan! whoodathunkit?
well, tell us about yourself and we can make some generalizations about you. see if you're a stand up comedian. Come on, that'll be funny | |
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Anx said: miguelbulcao said: Not just anyone can listen to The Cure. To be able to listen to The Cure's music without catastrophic and life-threatening side effects occurring it is first necessary to fulfil the following conditions:
* You must be suffering from major depression, preferably in conjunction with chronic alcoholism. * You need to be an active member of the exclusive Goth subculture. * You must be a believer in the philosophical theory of existentialism, believing all existence is totally meaningless and the only things you can believe in is angst and despair. [Note: as the emotion of angst has been copyrighted by Goths, you need to hold an active Goth license before you can believe in it, otherwise you may be sued. It is mistaken believed that Emos are also allowed angst, but in actuality the Emo form of angst is an illegally rip-off.] * You should have written lots of really bad, depressing poetry, bemoaning the futility of existence and forced the people who used to beyour friends, before you made them read your poetry, to read them all. If you can answer "yes" to all of the above you are ready to listen to The Cure, although chances are you probably already are anyway.
source: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/The_Cure now ain't this some bullshit. consider the gothy gloom in a lyric like "you're so perfect, you're so right as rain/kiss you from your feet to where your head begins". that's a suicide note right there, is what that is.
you're worse than my mom! It was a joke...DUUHHH!  | |
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miguelbulcao said: It was a joke...DUUHHH! generalizations are not jokes...no duh and i'm not humorless... i am talking with you | |
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miguelbulcao said: It was a joke...DUUHHH!  now THAT was funny! | |
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Anx...i have some really good Bill Cosby stuff I can burn you. Please let me help out. | |
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PurpleHallnOatesfan said: Anx...i have some really good Bill Cosby stuff I can burn you. Please let me help out.
nah, i'm good with my sandra bernhard cds and my internet trolls. Flamebait is hiLARious...like cancer! | |
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miguelbulcao said: * You should have written lots of really bad, depressing poetry, bemoaning the futility of existence and forced the people who used to beyour friends, before you made them read your poetry, to read them all. OOOOHHHHH . . . So THAT's why the fellas didn't come over for Monday Night Football anymore?  Good night, sweet Prince | 7 June 1958 - 21 April 2016
Props will be withheld until the showing and proving has commenced. -- Aaron McGruder | |
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PurpleHallnOatesfan said: generalizations are not jokes...no duh man that is so true, generalizations aren't jokes at all. i mean imagine if a stand-up comedian came up with a joke about, oh, i dunno.... how white people can't dance or slam dunk, or how black dudes have large genitals, or how french people are rude, or how scottish people are all drunk, or something. they'd never get anywhere! [Edited 8/23/06 15:22pm] | |
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wow. this thread is all  Now go burn some patchoulli and follow candle trails!
That was joke. A happy face, A Thumpin Bass, For A Lovin' Race. PEACE. | |
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theghostoftonym said: PurpleHallnOatesfan said: generalizations are not jokes...no duh man that is so true, generalizations aren't jokes at all. i mean imagine if a stand-up comedian came up with a joke about, oh, i dunno.... how white people can't dance or slam dunk, or how black dudes have large genitals, or how french people are rude, or how scottish people are all drunk, or something. they'd never get anywhere! [Edited 8/23/06 15:22pm] i know you're meaning to be sarcastic, but i agree with you on a wholly earnest level. that's all easy humor. we've heard it all before. i guess it works for 'mind of mencia' or whatever, but yawn a roonie. | |
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i wasnt saying all jokes with those generalizations are funny. i was just replying to the absurd idea that a generalization is not a joke when so many jokes in history have been made based around TONGUE-IN-CHEEK generalizations | |
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theghostoftonym said: i wasnt saying all jokes with those generalizations are funny. i was just replying to the absurd idea that a generalization is not a joke when so many jokes in history have been made based around TONGUE-IN-CHEEK generalizations
a lot of things can be considered jokes. whether or not they're considered funny at all is another thing altogether. | |
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I definitely don't qualify and I love the Cure.  "Whitney was purely and simply one of a kind." ~ Clive Davis | |
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sextonseven said: But The Cure aren't goth. Mopey, yes. Goth, no.
They made some pretty great goth records in the early 80's though.  | |
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If that's what it takes to be able to listen to their music, count me in! 
Best band ever! Feel free to join in the Prince Album Poll 2018! Let'a celebrate his legacy by counting down the most beloved Prince albums, as decided by you! | |
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Moonbeam said: Best band ever!
Our savior!!  [Edited 8/23/06 21:01pm] | |
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GangstaFam said: Moonbeam said: Best band ever!
Our savior!!  Disintegration is the best album ever! Robear Smeece! Robear Smeece! Feel free to join in the Prince Album Poll 2018! Let'a celebrate his legacy by counting down the most beloved Prince albums, as decided by you! | |
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Moonbeam said: Disintegration is the best album ever!
Robear Smeece! Robear Smeece! The org needs a new emoticon!  | |
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GangstaFam said: sextonseven said: But The Cure aren't goth. Mopey, yes. Goth, no.
They made some pretty great goth records in the early 80's though. After listening to the remasters, I've realized 'Pornography' is my second favorite Cure album. | |
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