From this weeks HUMO magazine (Belgium)
20.04.04

review by Serge Simonart, Notorious Prince fan and downright cunt.
translated by me...

PRINCE-MUSICOLOGY.
There are two kinds of critics. Those who are driven by cynicism, power hunger,
and jealousy, and get a hard-on when hearing a bad record,
happy it serves as their alibi for any bottled up frustration. And those who, with admiration
as their engine, yearn to spread the word on their found beauty to kindred spirits, in the hope
that this brilliant music enriches their lives. For the latter there's nothing worse than a hero
who dissapoints, an idol on the dole. The fan only wants GOD to perform miracles; weakness
or a temporary slump should a stranger to him.

Le nouveau Prince est arrivé, and the boring cover art, looking like the garbage from
some local amateur funk band, doesn't predict much of a positive effort.
Opening track Musicology wants to be a lesson in da funk, but unfortunately
all songs and artists it name checks are far more superior than this mediocre track.
In addition to that it's not well suited as a single.

Illusion, Pimp & Circumstance doesn't offer much more than a lame play of words.
Life O' the Party tries to be a call to arms but it's too fragmentary and tedious
to be the soundtrack for a real party. What do u want Me to Do? and The Marrying Kind
and If Eye was the Man in ur Life just drift off without me taking any notice.
Even after listening to the album seven times, they still leave me indifferent.

Thank God Prince hasn't jumped on the current plastic r&b bandwagon. Even if Outkast & Co shamelessly loot his back catalogue. But revolutionary or pioneering, these songs are by
no means. Prince once wrote perfect, compact pop songs. But nowadays he feels the urge to
stuff everything with useless, nervous little jazzy embellishments. This way he prevents 'If Eye was the Man in ur life' and A Million days from take-off by means of confusing breaks, pushy solos and an overdosis on percussion. The kind off stuff only other musicians are waiting for. This seems to be Princes current problem, like some megalomaniac actor who
isn't satisfied with his part and insists on directing himself. Being Prince is not enough for Prince. He wants to be the Miles Davis as well. 'Musicology' suffers slightly less from this
than it's predecessor The Rainbow Children, but still too much all the same.

By the time Call my Name kicks in the plot does seem to fit. this is a grand ballad of
a Prince in love. Even the other ballads On the Couch and Dear Mr. Man work well here.

Let's face it, since Prince stopped being Slave and can do whatever he pleases for
100%, his output is getting more uneven. 'Musicology' is one of those albums that keeps
a desperate fan waiting for it to happen...but even lyrically it's rather tame. There are no
oral sex references, bar 'On the Couch' where he wants to go down south. There's no incest, extreme flirtation that his purple hornyness used to offer. Nor is there any effective social engagement à la Sign O' the Times.

For the standards of a lesser God 'Musicology' would be a Gold Experience. But albums
by a genius are supposed to be genius. If Prince wants to keep on making the soundtrack to my life the music has to be one exhausting orgy, not some polite feel-up.



ANASTACIA interview by Serge Simonart.
(The man has the annoying habit to bring up Prince in every interview)

ANASTACIA:
'Sade & Prince should make babies...'

HUMO:
You and Prince should do a duet. he just signed with SONY, so... I MEAN it...
ANASTACIA:
'I know, Everyone at SONY means it too. Believe me (laughs). About three seconds after
he signed with them, your suggestion was written on the wall. We'll see.'

Oy veh. Just what he needs, a howling Taylor Dayne clone to shout him down. She needs to stick to her boyband reject material and stay the hell away from Prince.

There may be two kinds of critics, but they're all terribly afraid to be accused of bad taste by their colleagues. Sorry you were left all alone at the main intersection of Uptown, many moons ago (lack of oral sex and incest = lack of audacity? Hmmkey, rude garçon)

This Man is Such an Ass. Really. This album is Great and ya Know why does Prince gotta have all kinds of Salacious Gratuitious Sex References. Prince is a Musician and he Creates Beautiful Music and Party Tunes. If Ya Want all Sex and stuff well go rent a PORNO FLICK and if Ya Want Wild Sick go Watch some Amsterdam Flicks. Prince is all over that stuff he created way back in 1981. Anastacia Stinks.

It doesn't matter that its a bad review for Musicology. But it's just poorly written, translation notwithstanding.

Ignorance.


Of course. Anything less than Prince re-inventing the wheel is UNacceptable.


How old is this pubescent buffoon?

Martinelli said:

Pretty much.

I don't mind a negative review, but to base it partly on the fact that it's not some exercise in sexual explicitness is idiotic.