Mine would be,

"NPGMC is PROUD to announce the next Prince release "INCARNATE WORD", an all instrumental meditation on the emerging THEOCRATIC ORDER, featuring Larry Graham on bazz and spoken word Biblican verze.

The NPG and Mr. Graham will then hit the ROAD for mini-concert/study sessions on the new THEOCRATIC ORDER.

Fams can participate for $500 for back row SEATS and $1000 for front row SEATS."

Soladeo

Scary thing is...I can almost see that happening

NPGMC is pleased 2 announce the addition of Mr. Kenny G to the NPG. We R CONfident that his brand of smoov jazz will further accentuate the supersexyconvalescentscooterfied funk...not 2 mention the Xcitement at Paisley Park when the word got 'round that Prince is rerecording the legendary Purple Rain album, with all the guitar solos replaced by Kenny's easy jazz stylings!!! THE FUNK IS ALIVE!!!

We would like 2 4merly announce the impending release of the Jehovah series - Prince and Larry have re-recorded all of his good albums to please Jehovah. Our sins and his albums R now washed clean! PRAISE JEHOVAH!

Anxiety said:

OMG, I'm in tears. Too funny

NPG Retail selling a giant poster of Larrys feet...

Tom said:

scratch n'sniff?

NPGMC year 4.

"There will ne NO namechecks ..ever"

hilarious, i'm stupefied!

"We r proud 2 inform U that we r getting ready 2 release
an Xclusive remiX EP which will feature 8 brand new and
unreleased memberXclusive remixes of "Silicon" for Ur
pleasure only".

The NPGMC is sad to announce that all these years it was not Prince who was composing, arranging, and palying the instruments on his albums for the pat 25 years. In truth it was Mr. Michael Jackson.

For $2,000 Prince and Larry Graham will come knock on your door at 9:00 in the morning to discuss the most recent issue of Awake! If you don't want Larry to attend it will be $2,500.

A spoken-word CD release by Larry featuring an accapella version of
'All Along The Watchtower' would just about do it I should think.








*crapapella Edit*
[This message was edited Tue Oct 28 15:08:44 PST 2003 by bananacologne]

Anxiety said:

An announcement that he had passed away would be the worst.

mrdespues said:

that would b the WORST

cborgman said:

Can't breathe... lol

"Prince is dead. The artist formerly known as the artist formerly known as Prince shall henceforth be known as the artist formerly known as the formerly known artist of Prince", or words to that effect.

Tom said:

;lol;It would have to be billboard sized.

sumfin to the effect of, after 23 years of service, the hohner is being retired.

squirrelgrease said:

you'd have to post it alongside interstate 94...

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

Dont worry sweetie, from what I saw over here in Aus, he's back in love with that little beauty.

"From this day forth, Prince will be releasing all his new music on cassette only"

News that he's bringing TC Ellis back into the studio to record the followup to his smash debut album...