CAUTION: if you suffer from humor deficiency, then this thread may not be for you. consult your physician/doctor/psychiatrist/clergyman before readin any further and gettin your pannies in a bunch. this is done in mere humor and i mean no ill-will towards anyone. end of disclaimer.


o-tay, some of ya'll know that prince has become a jehovah's witness as of late and how he's been sighted in the 'burbs of minneapolis, goin door-to-door, preachin 'the good word' and handin out a copy of awake! or two. well, just in case he happens to leave the minnesota borders and pop up in your area, here are some tips on how to keep him and larry 'scary' graham outta yer hair.

should prince come to your place of residence and wish to ask you if you realize that your way of religion is wrong or what-not, here's a few tips on how to make 'im skedaddle (with a little help from some illustrations i ganked from ready.gov, eheh):


Open up your door and tell him that some kid selling Amway products has taken the last of your money. If he persists in his religious spouting, open up your door a bit and pimp-slap him. Repeat as necessary until he shuts up or realizes that you don't wish to be bothered.



If he still does not get the message, proceed to hold the door shut with your body. If Larry attempts to help Prince with busting down your front door, take your large red emergency arrow and stick it through an open crevice in your door. Poke them with it viciously till they stop and run away.



If all of your attempts have failed, the last resort is to invite them in for some s'mores and light conversation. DO NOT light a campfire in your living room though. Not a smart thing to do by any means.


this has been a public service announcement brought to you by me. thank you and have a good night.

I love it!
[This message was edited Thu Oct 16 16:07:07 PDT 2003 by psychodelicide]

A class thread by a class Orger who is a class lady!

ehehehe. 5 stars!...

I Luv it Deja it's supurb I read that article also and I was like what???!!! I thought it was kinda funny

If somebody puts on "Jughead" and plays it at full blast, either curl up into a tiny ball for the duration of the song or run away immediately and report the disturbance to local authorities.

In case of rabid fam attack, take a cloth and place it over your nose and mouth. Proceed to speak and act in the mannerisms of Michael Jackson in order to ward them off. For added effect, drool uncontrollably.

EXCELLENT

The Dirty Mind album is unsuitable for family listening. Take your child(ren) over to their grandparent's/babysitter's/close friend's residence before playing this album.

That, or at least let them listen to "When You Were Mine".

Be sure to take a break from listening to Prince/Prince-related material at least once every 3 months. Your stereo equipment, computer and television set will thank you for it.

Get Wild: please think before you spray it on.

hahahahahahahahahahaha!!!
classic!

FIVE STARS!!! LMFAO!!!

Handsclap...

Listening to Tony M's lyrical content for extended periods of time causes noxious fumes to spew forth from your stereo equipment.

2the9s said:

:ikeslap:

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

heh heh

In case of air and/or ground raids from the Paisley Legal Mafioso, bootleggers should NOT keep their goods stored in plain view.

If you are playing any slow songs by Prince on full blast in your house while your windows are open, beware of any vomitrocious-looking female neighbors who may start stripping nearby. Keep eyes averted from them at all times.

Should you become unhappy with any of Prince's fuck-ups, you are free to leave the purple realm at any time. Just be sure to look where you're going, otherwise you will fall straight down the exit staircase and bust your ass.

o-tay, one mo' for tonight...i might continue on with this tomorrow, cuz this shit's fun to do.


Under any circumstances, NEVER let de-elevator bring you down. Go crazy, if necessary.




...takes a bow

God, I missed this place!

BlueAgave said:

blue!!! welcome back!!!

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

that made me laugh!

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

:LOL: :FALLOFF: :LOL:

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

This is killer!! Fantastic thread handclaps

...gosh, that is funny handclaps

Great thead!