Let's face it. Aside from SoTT, none of Prince's movies were all that great. Purple Rain was...OK...and anchored by his mesmerizing musical performances and his sheer charisma. Even SoTT was dragged down a notch by the weird "dramatic" segues and also by the re-staging of a "live" show.

As a connoisseur of "so bad they're funny" types of films, Mystery Science Theater style stuff, and in possession of a sense of humor, I stumbled upon these. Before Bart bursts in and rudely tells me there's already a thread for it and calls me an idiot who can't use the search function, the Cherry Moon thread is locked. So that's a pre-emptive fuck off.

4 of 5 of these are podcasts and funny to listen to at work, driving or doing dishes. One has clips.

Start with Purple Rain in 2 parts:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5B1y_fWiOWY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdacl_xEt-c

Under the Cherry Moon:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQfD03im-ng

Graffiti Bridge (only for the brave)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umPq_eJdJr8

Under the Cherry Moon.

This is my favorite only because it's the only one that has clips in it and the others are podcasts. Also contains a hilarious re-enactment of of a Christopher and Mary phone call that shows you how stupid the whole thing is minus whatever screen presence Prince and his co-star lend to it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNQ9QGP5-DM


....

I'm as big a Prince fan as there is but...my god...his movies are NOT good films. The guy has his moments as an "actor" but he's never objectively good in anything. He's got charisma for days and presence to spare but, aside from PR, none of this shit makes any sense whatsoever and he can never....stop...POSING.

endiadj said:

Purple Rain is a classic. SOTT is tremendous! UTCM and Graffiti Bridge I'd watch any time just for pure fun!

I like PR, but I can't defend its acting or call it a great movie. It's a "classic" as far as "superstar musician makes a movie that showcases a real talent" is and it has a lot going for it but it's not Goodfellas, Raging Bull or Glen Gary Glen Ross. And the acting is fucking terrible.

I love, LOVE the SoTT movie. It's my favorite Prince film by far but that's only because I like to see Prince play and whatever that stuff was that wasn't him doing that was pretty corny. I just liking making fun of bad movies and UTCM and GB are...my god...pretty fucking bad...so I figured I'd just share some stuff I found funny. I'm glad u have fun watching them but, if u don't mind me asking, what's "fun" beyond the fact that you like looking at Prince? I'm so die hard (and old) I saw them both in the theater and dragged a couple of non fans with me and ...um...yeah.

Let's just say they weren't converted.

Seeing those films once was enough but I had to watch them each a second time just to make sure I wasn't crazy, missing something or just to make sure that, yes, in fact, they did indeed suck terribly. Even for a fan, pitching his films never seemd to me to be the way to show his brilliance.

[Edited 4/22/19 15:18pm]

EmmaMcG said:

In fairness, Purple Rain didn't really have any professional actors in any of the lead roles. Taking that into account, I rate it a solid 4/5. The 2 male leads, Prince and Morris Day, are actually quite decent. They do what's required of them. Appolonia is basically a plank of wood with a great rack, but she puts her "assets" to good use. Sure, she can't act, but she doesn't really have to. Story-wise, Purple Rain is actually pretty good, if very simple. The son hates his father but realises that he is becoming just like him. So he changes his ways. It's not subtle, nothing about Prince was subtle, but again, it's well told. The movie is a really great showcase of Prince's live act though. And that's all it really set out to be. Sure, it's got one of the biggest plot holes in movie history, but his onstage antics in First Avenue more than make up for it. Under The Cherry Moon is mediocre. It's not bad. It's just not good. Very forgettable. If Prince wasn't in it and it had a different soundtrack, would anyone actually care about it one way or another? 2/5. Graffiti Bridge is actually pretty terrible. And not even "so bad it's good" either. It's just plain bad. Decent soundtrack but nothing special. 1/5. Sign O The Times is a great concert movie. The little skits are pointless but put Prince on a stage and magic ensues. It's not really fair to judge it against the other movies seeing as it's only a concert movie but it's one of the best concert movies you'll get. 5/5.

Agreed.

What's the "plot hole"? Genuinely curious.

And has anyone actually listened to the podcasts I posted lol?

PR was weak...music was amazing.... Morris and Jerome carried that movie. Prince and Apps could act their way out of a paper bag. Sorry. But it's true.

herb4 said:

herb4 said:

has anyone actually listened to the podcasts I posted lol?

so far,I watched the UTCM podcast it was hilarious

EmmaMcG said:

herb4 said:

Agreed.

What's the "plot hole"? Genuinely curious.

And has anyone actually listened to the podcasts I posted lol?

Purple Rain plothole: Billy, the club owner, has limited space on the roster. He's got three bands, he doesn't need four. So, who are the four bands vying for the three spots? The Revolution, The Time, Appolonia 6 and The Modernaires. And of those four bands, Billy has decided that The Modernaires and Appolonia are safe and one of either The Revolution or The Time have to go. Which makes zero sense because they are easily the two best bands he's got. Even in movie's depiction of things, The Revolution and The Time get the best reception from the crowd. Why would he ever contemplate getting rid of either of them? In no world does that make sense. Realistically, they should be safe. It should come down to Appolonia and The Modernaires. And in that scenario, you'd have to say goodbye to the Modernaires because even though Appolonia is shit, she's going to draw a decent crowd so long as she's prancing around half naked.

But we're TOLD that the Kid isn't drawing them in anymore, and that he's just like his daddy, and that nobody digs his music but himself. Obviously, he's the one that has to go.

Sure, there's no indication that any of that is true from the perfomances and reactions, but they SAY it, so it must be true, right?

EddieC said:

EmmaMcG said:

EddieC said:

But we're TOLD that the Kid isn't drawing them in anymore, and that he's just like his daddy, and that nobody digs his music but himself. Obviously, he's the one that has to go.

Sure, there's no indication that any of that is true from the perfomances and reactions, but they SAY it, so it must be true, right?

That in itself is another plot hole though, right? They're telling us he's not drawing crowds, but we can clearly see he's not only drawing the crowds, he's also getting the best reception. Billy seems out of his depth to be honest. HE doesn't dig The Revolution's music so he thinks everyone else shares his opinion. He's got no business running that club. Now, if it were me running it, The Revolution would be my top act. The Time would be secondary but I'd pay them equal, with bonuses paid to the band who draws the biggest crowd, just to keep them competitive. Appolonia would go on every Saturday night and perform their little strip tease show they do. I wouldn't pay them anything but I'd let them keep 70% of the dollar bills that get stuffed into their lingerie, because I'm a good person. Meanwhile, The Modernaires can take their single song act elsewhere because there's no demand for that.

You know, sometimes I think I can get carried away when critiquing camp 80s movies....

However, in the final performance, that night The Time plays first, and then Prince. So we don't really know if the club was packed to see The Time, or Prince, or a combination. For that matter, neither would Billy know that, either.

I have 2 or 3 or 4 or I wish I could forget how many Dez Dickerson CDs that I bought when he was finally able to release "Modernaire". No disrespect to Dez but you are right - they were a single song act.

dont let thedoorkeeper see this thread

EmmaMcG said:

herb4 said:

Agreed.

What's the "plot hole"? Genuinely curious.

And has anyone actually listened to the podcasts I posted lol?

Purple Rain plothole: Billy, the club owner, has limited space on the roster. He's got three bands, he doesn't need four. So, who are the four bands vying for the three spots? The Revolution, The Time, Appolonia 6 and The Modernaires. And of those four bands, Billy has decided that The Modernaires and Appolonia are safe and one of either The Revolution or The Time have to go. Which makes zero sense because they are easily the two best bands he's got. Even in movie's depiction of things, The Revolution and The Time get the best reception from the crowd. Why would he ever contemplate getting rid of either of them? In no world does that make sense. Realistically, they should be safe. It should come down to Appolonia and The Modernaires. And in that scenario, you'd have to say goodbye to the Modernaires because even though Appolonia is shit, she's going to draw a decent crowd so long as she's prancing around half naked.

Maybe he's just tired of the Kid's shit.

rdhull said:

dont let thedoorkeeper see this thread

the who now?

herb4 said:

herb4 said:

The movie Purple Rain is typically criticized as nothing more than a series of music videos. I concede that's mostly true.

.

But in its defense, the slight story that frames the musical performances is remarkable. It's unlike anything Hollywood would normally produce.

.

The lead character is an absolute monster. I don't mean the typically Hollywood rough-but-lovable, anti-hero/rogue archetype (e.g. Han Solo). Hollywood often tries to give a character an edge by making him drink a bit too much, womanize a bit too much, disrespect authority (e.g. be a nonviolent criminal), etc. It's such a safe and easy way out. But that's not The Kid in Purple Rain. He's an arrogant ass who condescends to his best friends. Worse, he slaps his girlfriend in the face (that scene is done really well because it's meant to be appalling and make the audience uncomfortable... in short, it's meant to make you delike The Kid... and the scene makes sense in that he'd been watching his dad beat his mom, which is the way most domestic abusers learn in real life).

.

Most rock star movies try to glorify their star; they don't work this hard to make the audience despise the star. And then the film takes an even darker turn when his dad shoots himself in the head. That's bold, non-formulaic story-telling.

.

The obvious counterargument to everything I just wrote is that the final scene of the movie is montage set to a peppy dance number showing The Kid reconciling with his girlfriend/victim, and his father alive in the hospital with a ridiculous bandage on his head where he shot himself (as though he might eventually be okay despite having a bullet in his brain). I concede that undercuts my argument.

.

However, I believe I've read (or maybe heard it in the the director's commentary) that finale montage scene was added at the insistence of Warner Bros. The original ending of the movie had The Kid's dad successfully killing not only himself, but the mother too. Warner Bros. thought that would be too bleak and depressing and audiences would hate it. Apparently if Prince had his way his character would have committed suicide too.

.

One other defense I have of the movie: People understandably criticize the acting, but I ask them to keep in mind that the cast isn't a group of B-grade actors with pretensions. With two exceptions, the cast were all Prince's friends. When you watch the film and know that it's simply a bunch of buddies making a gloried home movie, their acting deficiencies become part of the charm. Plus, it gives you even greater respect for some of the performances that were genuinely good (such as Morris Day's).

.

I don't think you undercut your argument.

Purple Rain goes out of its way to show an assholish lead character but also demonstrates WHY he's that way and offers some sort of discernable path to redemption that most of us can follow. I LIKE Purple Rain but doubt I would if you removed the musical numbers. I think the same of GB (the musical number are the best parts) except in that film, the performances aren't as good, the songs aren't as strong (especially the Big Payoff/finale), somehow the acting is even WORSE and the weird, metaphysical cryptic spiritual shit just doesn't work at all.

PR didn't really need a sequel, TBH, but if there had to be one, there were a hundred better ways to go about it than that abomination.

herb4 said:

herb4 said:

margi said:

herb4 said:

I don't think you undercut your argument.

Purple Rain goes out of its way to show an assholish lead character but also demonstrates WHY he's that way and offers some sort of discernable path to redemption that most of us can follow. I LIKE Purple Rain but doubt I would if you removed the musical numbers. I think the same of GB (the musical number are the best parts) except in that film, the performances aren't as good, the songs aren't as strong (especially the Big Payoff/finale), somehow the acting is even WORSE and the weird, metaphysical cryptic spiritual shit just doesn't work at all.

PR didn't really need a sequel, TBH, but if there had to be one, there were a hundred better ways to go about it than that abomination.

You are a load of verbal diarrhoea about nothing and lack credibility with your lack of understanding of what Prince was doing. Have you done anything of interest other than self interest lately? Keep your trivial mouth closed and sit on your hands. Save us all from your tirade.

The fuck is wrong with you?

Grow a sense of humour, have a Coke and a smile and shut the fuck up!

margi said:

herb4 said:

I don't think you undercut your argument.

Purple Rain goes out of its way to show an assholish lead character but also demonstrates WHY he's that way and offers some sort of discernable path to redemption that most of us can follow. I LIKE Purple Rain but doubt I would if you removed the musical numbers. I think the same of GB (the musical number are the best parts) except in that film, the performances aren't as good, the songs aren't as strong (especially the Big Payoff/finale), somehow the acting is even WORSE and the weird, metaphysical cryptic spiritual shit just doesn't work at all.

PR didn't really need a sequel, TBH, but if there had to be one, there were a hundred better ways to go about it than that abomination.

You are a load of verbal diarrhoea about nothing and lack credibility with your lack of understanding of what Prince was doing. Have you done anything of interest other than self interest lately? Keep your trivial mouth closed and sit on your hands. Save us all from your tirade.

The fuck are you talking about?

Oh, shit. My bad.

I meant to say that every Prince movie is absolutely fantastic, with wonderful actors, totally compelling stories and highly competent screen writing.

[Edited 4/26/19 5:01am]

margi said:

herb4 said:

I don't think you undercut your argument.

Purple Rain goes out of its way to show an assholish lead character but also demonstrates WHY he's that way and offers some sort of discernable path to redemption that most of us can follow. I LIKE Purple Rain but doubt I would if you removed the musical numbers. I think the same of GB (the musical number are the best parts) except in that film, the performances aren't as good, the songs aren't as strong (especially the Big Payoff/finale), somehow the acting is even WORSE and the weird, metaphysical cryptic spiritual shit just doesn't work at all.

PR didn't really need a sequel, TBH, but if there had to be one, there were a hundred better ways to go about it than that abomination.

You are a load of verbal diarrhoea about nothing and lack credibility with your lack of understanding of what Prince was doing. Have you done anything of interest other than self interest lately? Keep your trivial mouth closed and sit on your hands. Save us all from your tirade.

You're awesome! Do me next!

The title of this thread is douchebaggy. That is all.

^^^The fuck is wrong with my thread title now? What the hell? What might you suggest, good sir or madam?^^^

Actually, you guys have shown me the error of my ways and I stand corrected.

Grafitti Bridge and Under the Cherry Moon are cinematic masterpieces that are in no way worthy of derision, mockery or criticism in any way whatsoever and both offer stellar screen writing, transcendent acting and oscar worthy pacing, direction and dialogue. The 19% and 34% Rotten Tomatoes scores for these works of amazing film making are clearly an anomaly and all of those people, including myself and the makers of these podcasts, are wrong and big stupid heads.

I'm glad you enjoy these films (which I used to think suck) and your totally sane, not at all defensive or over the top, friendly, quite stable and in no way mean informative posts have shown me the light.

Forgive me...?

Nah, just kidding. UTCM and GB are awful but I actually like awful movies and people with a sense of humor making fun of them MST style. You could just...you know....tell the thread why these films are wonderful in your eyes, go start a thread lauding their artistic merit,comment on the links I posted, .or..OR....Ignore ME and go shit up another thread or something if you feel compelled to add more clever, scathing commentary and persona attacks.

Let's go have a look at some of YOUR contributions to Prince.org.


Ahem...

*puts on reading glasses*

[Edited 4/26/19 15:33pm]

rdhull said:

herb4 said:

the who now?

The orger called thedoorkeeper...he had a kaniption in that Spotify thread because Spotify said some of his output was inconsistent. So these criticisms of his movies are gonna give him a heart attack lol [Edited 4/23/19 17:01pm]

oh, OK. I won't.

Did "thedoorkeeper' change their name to "Margi" by any chance?

herb4 said:

rdhull said:

herb4 said: The orger called thedoorkeeper...he had a kaniption in that Spotify thread because Spotify said some of his output was inconsistent. So these criticisms of his movies are gonna give him a heart attack lol [Edited 4/23/19 17:01pm]

oh, OK. I won't.

Did "thedoorkeeper' change their name to "Margi" by any chance?

Did (certain) people miss the things I wrote that I LIKED about these movies?

The music, Prince's screen presence, some of the directing and plot points...a few of the story beats.

PR takes me back to high school and really sort of figuring myself out, my personal tastes and my sexuality. I love how his movies (and Prince) challenged the traditional forms and imagery of masculinity and how he wasn't afraid to be androgenous. I have a soft spot for UTCM and Parade because I lost my virginty to it. GB had some buck wild insane musical numbers, costumes and just freaky, challenging batshit audacity.

I admire the sheer balls of this man, the dedicated scope of his vision, his hard work and determination and the vast legacy he left behind. He accomplished more in one lifetime than I could do in 50 and was (and is) a role model for how I've tried to live my life in many ways. Doesn't mean it all landed for me. And I'd never aspire to follow in his footsteps had I chosen to be a film maker nor advise anyone studying the art of cinema to go and brush up on thier technique through a fertive scene by scene deconstruction of Grafitti Bridge or UTCM for crying out loud. Perhaps I am missing something here but no one has told me WHAT that is.

Sure, you wanna learn how to own a stage and work an audience? Go check out SoTT.

I have a wonderful time watching his films and sometimes find them utterly hysterical (though probably not for the reasons he intended). Anything that makes me laugh is A-Ok in my book.

Prince is far and away my all time favorite musician and has been for close to 40 years. An actor and a director? Nah, not so much.