I know there have been many posts about this (so for that I apologise)
Struggling is an understatement. Every day is different & I never know what to expect from one day to the next with my emotions. Your icon, your hero, your everything for the past 30+ years has gone. Desperate to hear him on the radio! I can't turn P Funk radio off, as I know they will be playing another Prince track soon. Constantly playing his music in my car, for comfort, when I'm alone. Some days I am good, others I am a complete mess. Hardest thing is you feel like you have to hide it, cause hardly anyone around you will understand.
Last year was so tough. Then the approach to New Year's Eve was unbearable (I bit everyones head off) then New Years day, strangely felt a little better. Now that the anniversary is approaching I am going under again fast.
My tattoo brings great comfort. My newly decorated room with my Prince album covers in frames brings comfort. Found all my old posters the other day & my partner is crapping himself that they will be put up all over our home too. There are many, many things that bring comfort, but it's just this sudden grief and crying from nowhere, that I am struggling with. Once i start, I can't stop! I'm sure I am not alone. Just watched the Grammy's and I'm a mess once again. I loved him so much!

find a therapist

Iamtheorg said:

find a therapist

anangellooksdown said:

I truly believe that Prince knows how much you love him. I feel that he is at total peace with God. I have been still staying close to him and also grieving but at the same time feel that he would want us to be present for our lives as well. We can have two or more feelings at the same time.

^^^^^^^THIS^^^^^^^

[Edited 2/13/17 15:42pm]

4everinmylife said:

4everinmylife said:

I have coped by listening to his music and creating scrapbook pages with his song lyrics. Definitely has helped me get through those tough times.

Joining and coming to the .org also has been a big help in the grief process.

chin up!

Listen to Prince!

Be glad you lived during his time on earth.

Iamtheorg said:

find a therapist

I find statements like this to be mean spirited.

I'm sure you have good intentions but.....it doesn't do the OP any good.

I think sending a note of encouragement and brotherhood to be much more inclusive and helpful.

I feel the same way as the OP and to be honest I was shut down and told to "get help" and it just pissed me off.

I really wanted to identify with someone that held similar feelings...I know they're out there.

And instead I was stepped on by an asshole that felt superior.

You go OP.

I'm with you.

LovePaisley said:

4everinmylife said:

I know there have been many posts about this (so for that I apologise)
Struggling is an understatement. Every day is different & I never know what to expect from one day to the next with my emotions. Your icon, your hero, your everything for the past 30+ years has gone. Desperate to hear him on the radio! I can't turn P Funk radio off, as I know they will be playing another Prince track soon. Constantly playing his music in my car, for comfort, when I'm alone. Some days I am good, others I am a complete mess. Hardest thing is you feel like you have to hide it, cause hardly anyone around you will understand.
Last year was so tough. Then the approach to New Year's Eve was unbearable (I bit everyones head off) then New Years day, strangely felt a little better. Now that the anniversary is approaching I am going under again fast.
My tattoo brings great comfort. My newly decorated room with my Prince album covers in frames brings comfort. Found all my old posters the other day & my partner is crapping himself that they will be put up all over our home too. There are many, many things that bring comfort, but it's just this sudden grief and crying from nowhere, that I am struggling with. Once i start, I can't stop! I'm sure I am not alone. Just watched the Grammy's and I'm a mess once again. I loved him so much!

What helped for me was turning it all off for a while. I'd go away for the weekend or spend time with family and friends, and while in those moments I'd heal. It's hard, like withdrawal almost. But I know Prince will be there when I get back. He'll always be there, tattooed on my ankle and on my heart. But he wouldn't want me to be sad, right? So I move on, discovering and rediscovering, turning a friend on to a song now and then when I can. "You like blues? Try this!" That's how Prince lives on. You can do it too. Hurts at first, but it's peaceful too. When P's divorce papers same out on 1/13 I saw his old IM, NPG2000@aol.com. So I wrote him a letter and told him about what I'd been up to these past months. And I sent it. It bounced back, of course, but it was so good to talk to him. Maybe that will work for you, too?

This is a very cool response.

thank you!

I'm so sorry for your pain...I can relate at least as far as I (as a stranger to you) can. I have experienced much more pain this past 10 months than I expected. For me, in order to process his passing, I work on two levels: (1) the work that he left for us--I listen to his music...analyse and enjoy! Collect! Dance! Revel! Appreciate! and (2) try to emulate what he wanted for us....he wasn't perfect but as he aged, I think he understood humanity with it's limitations and wanted us to strive for love for one another and joy in one's own life. So don't try to be perfect but try to enjoy life and be good to others. Things will be okay if you focus on the joy and love--focused on loving yourself (even with our faults) and outwardly toward others.

OMG--Just realized you are the original poster of the Can't Sleep? Play Prince A-Z thread....Lol. Thank you for that idea! I have used it over the last week or two and it's been very helpful. Seems you already know a thing or two about getting over Prince's passing........one other thought I had regarding your original post on this thread...Go see some live music somewhere....expand your horizons... Prince was very open minded on music and it could help you connect to him and the world at large to connect with live music. Love and peace!

Thanks for all your great advice. Really am grateful. Feeling better this morning & yes I will go and see some live music very soon!

mothyham said:

Iamtheorg said:

find a therapist

I find statements like this to be mean spirited.

I'm sure you have good intentions but.....it doesn't do the OP any good.

I think sending a note of encouragement and brotherhood to be much more inclusive and helpful.

I feel the same way as the OP and to be honest I was shut down and told to "get help" and it just pissed me off.

I really wanted to identify with someone that held similar feelings...I know they're out there.

And instead I was stepped on by an asshole that felt superior.

You go OP.

I'm with you.

The fact is, what the OP describes makes it clear that they need much more than encouragement and brotherhood. What they have described is unhealthy and it is clear that they need professional help.

Sure, it may sound flippant, but it is what it is. The OP needs professional help. Ignoring this reality is dangerous.

I'm with you, too, 4ever. PLEASE get some help. Prince would not want you to suffer like this.

djThunderfunk said:

mothyham said:

I find statements like this to be mean spirited.

I'm sure you have good intentions but.....it doesn't do the OP any good.

I think sending a note of encouragement and brotherhood to be much more inclusive and helpful.

I feel the same way as the OP and to be honest I was shut down and told to "get help" and it just pissed me off.

I really wanted to identify with someone that held similar feelings...I know they're out there.

And instead I was stepped on by an asshole that felt superior.

You go OP.

I'm with you.

The fact is, what the OP describes makes it clear that they need much more than encouragement and brotherhood. What they have described is unhealthy and it is clear that they need professional help.

Sure, it may sound flippant, but it is what it is. The OP needs professional help. Ignoring this reality is dangerous.

I'm with you, too, 4ever. PLEASE get some help. Prince would not want you to suffer like this.

Beautifully put.

To mothyham: There is nothing misery loves more than company - hence the saying, "Misery loves company." That's why alcoholics just looooooove their enablers. If there's somebody else in the hole with you, there can't really be anything wrong with you, can there? Other people feel/do the same - so you're on solid ground.

Except that there is something wrong. Anyone who is still so awash in grief that they can barely function - nearly a year after the passing of someone they didn't even know - has something wrong with them and needs therapy. It is not helpful - or kind - to say, "Here, let me crawl in the hole with you." The goal should be getting out of the hole - by any means necessary.

Because the alternative to getting out of the hole is ending up like Prince.

[Edited 2/14/17 11:13am]

Genesia said:

djThunderfunk said:

The fact is, what the OP describes makes it clear that they need much more than encouragement and brotherhood. What they have described is unhealthy and it is clear that they need professional help.

Sure, it may sound flippant, but it is what it is. The OP needs professional help. Ignoring this reality is dangerous.

I'm with you, too, 4ever. PLEASE get some help. Prince would not want you to suffer like this.

Beautifully put.

To mothyham: There is nothing misery loves more than company - hence the saying, "Misery loves company." That's why alcoholics just looooooove their enablers. If there's somebody else in the hole with you, there can't really be anything wrong with you, can there? Other people feel/do the same - so you're on solid ground.

Except that there is something wrong. Anyone who is still so awash in grief that they can barely function - nearly a year after the passing of someone they didn't even know - has something wrong with them and needs therapy. It is not helpful - or kind - to say, "Here, let me crawl in the hole with you." The goal should be getting out of the hole - by any means necessary.

Because the alternative to getting out of the hole is ending up like Prince.

[Edited 2/14/17 11:13am]

What a load of self righteous garbage.

I took the time to send the OP a note of support and just that littel gesture seemed to have made a difference to her or him. I sensed they just needed a pat on the back and some SUPPORT from a Prince Forum.

Granted, I'm not crying my eyes out or despondent. I am just sad he's gone and i think the OP feels the same way and conveyed it in a dramtic way.

Please note that the OP perked up later in this thread and simply thanked people for HEARING her or him.

But keep judging. I see it is working for ya.

mothyham said:

Genesia said:

Beautifully put.

To mothyham: There is nothing misery loves more than company - hence the saying, "Misery loves company." That's why alcoholics just looooooove their enablers. If there's somebody else in the hole with you, there can't really be anything wrong with you, can there? Other people feel/do the same - so you're on solid ground.

Except that there is something wrong. Anyone who is still so awash in grief that they can barely function - nearly a year after the passing of someone they didn't even know - has something wrong with them and needs therapy. It is not helpful - or kind - to say, "Here, let me crawl in the hole with you." The goal should be getting out of the hole - by any means necessary.

Because the alternative to getting out of the hole is ending up like Prince.

[Edited 2/14/17 11:13am]

What a load of self righteous garbage.

I took the time to send the OP a note of support and just that littel gesture seemed to have made a difference to her or him. I sensed they just needed a pat on the back and some SUPPORT from a Prince Forum.

Granted, I'm not crying my eyes out or despondent. I am just sad he's gone and i think the OP feels the same way and conveyed it in a dramtic way.

Please note that the OP perked up later in this thread and simply thanked people for HEARING her or him.

But keep judging. I see it is working for ya.

Thank you so much for this message. It really means a lot to hear this and the fact you took time to send me this. Thank you In the orgNote sent Mon Feb 13 2017 8:49pm, you said: > On the 'How are you supposed to deal with this?' thread you said: > > > I get it. > I am the same way. > And I'm a 50 year old guy. White, too. > I guess I loved him too and he's always on my mind. > i used to listen to everything. Dylan, Neil Young, Bowie, The who, the Rolling stones, Miles Davis, Dwight yoakam and Willie, Richard Thompson, p funk, funkadelic, I could go on. a varied lot of musical grab bags. > But now it's just Prince. > everyday, all day. > I look for things I haven't heard before and it's getting slim to none for new listens. > My last count was 1658 songs on iTunes that I have of Prince. > Anyway,....I get it. > Me too. > And fuck them that say get some help. you don't need help. > you have a heart.

It is extremely arrogant of you to think a "pat on the back" from you is enough.

Are you in a profession as a counselor, psychologist, clergy or some other field qualified to make that call? It seems clear from the OP that this is a potentially serious situation. Severe depression is a serious condition and requires professional help, not a pat on the back and an orgnote. Both are very kind of you but neither does squat in the long run.

Un-BE-lievable!!

djThunderfunk said:

mothyham said:

What a load of self righteous garbage.

I took the time to send the OP a note of support and just that littel gesture seemed to have made a difference to her or him. I sensed they just needed a pat on the back and some SUPPORT from a Prince Forum.

Granted, I'm not crying my eyes out or despondent. I am just sad he's gone and i think the OP feels the same way and conveyed it in a dramtic way.

Please note that the OP perked up later in this thread and simply thanked people for HEARING her or him.

But keep judging. I see it is working for ya.

Thank you so much for this message. It really means a lot to hear this and the fact you took time to send me this. Thank you In the orgNote sent Mon Feb 13 2017 8:49pm, you said: > On the 'How are you supposed to deal with this?' thread you said: > > > I get it. > I am the same way. > And I'm a 50 year old guy. White, too. > I guess I loved him too and he's always on my mind. > i used to listen to everything. Dylan, Neil Young, Bowie, The who, the Rolling stones, Miles Davis, Dwight yoakam and Willie, Richard Thompson, p funk, funkadelic, I could go on. a varied lot of musical grab bags. > But now it's just Prince. > everyday, all day. > I look for things I haven't heard before and it's getting slim to none for new listens. > My last count was 1658 songs on iTunes that I have of Prince. > Anyway,....I get it. > Me too. > And fuck them that say get some help. you don't need help. > you have a heart.

It is extremely arrogant of you to think a "pat on the back" from you is enough.

Are you in a profession as a counselor, psychologist, clergy or some other field qualified to make that call? It seems clear from the OP that this is a potentially serious situation. Severe depression is a serious condition and requires professional help, not a pat on the back and an orgnote. Both are very kind of you but neither does squat in the long run.

Un-BE-lievable!!

Actually yes, I am a clergical counseling psychiatrist.

mothyham said:

Genesia said:

Beautifully put.

To mothyham: There is nothing misery loves more than company - hence the saying, "Misery loves company." That's why alcoholics just looooooove their enablers. If there's somebody else in the hole with you, there can't really be anything wrong with you, can there? Other people feel/do the same - so you're on solid ground.

Except that there is something wrong. Anyone who is still so awash in grief that they can barely function - nearly a year after the passing of someone they didn't even know - has something wrong with them and needs therapy. It is not helpful - or kind - to say, "Here, let me crawl in the hole with you." The goal should be getting out of the hole - by any means necessary.

Because the alternative to getting out of the hole is ending up like Prince.

[Edited 2/14/17 11:13am]

What a load of self righteous garbage.

I took the time to send the OP a note of support and just that littel gesture seemed to have made a difference to her or him. I sensed they just needed a pat on the back and some SUPPORT from a Prince Forum.

Granted, I'm not crying my eyes out or despondent. I am just sad he's gone and i think the OP feels the same way and conveyed it in a dramtic way.

Please note that the OP perked up later in this thread and simply thanked people for HEARING her or him.

But keep judging. I see it is working for ya.

Thank you so much for this message. It really means a lot to hear this and the fact you took time to send me this. Thank you In the orgNote sent Mon Feb 13 2017 8:49pm, you said: > On the 'How are you supposed to deal with this?' thread you said: > > > I get it. > I am the same way. > And I'm a 50 year old guy. White, too. > I guess I loved him too and he's always on my mind. > i used to listen to everything. Dylan, Neil Young, Bowie, The who, the Rolling stones, Miles Davis, Dwight yoakam and Willie, Richard Thompson, p funk, funkadelic, I could go on. a varied lot of musical grab bags. > But now it's just Prince. > everyday, all day. > I look for things I haven't heard before and it's getting slim to none for new listens. > My last count was 1658 songs on iTunes that I have of Prince. > Anyway,....I get it. > Me too. > And fuck them that say get some help. you don't need help. > you have a heart.

Uh-huh. And I bet you are one of the people who's been whining since 4/21, "Why oh why oh why didn't the people around Prince heeeeeeeeeellllllllp him?"

Genesia said:

mothyham said:

What a load of self righteous garbage.

I took the time to send the OP a note of support and just that littel gesture seemed to have made a difference to her or him. I sensed they just needed a pat on the back and some SUPPORT from a Prince Forum.

Granted, I'm not crying my eyes out or despondent. I am just sad he's gone and i think the OP feels the same way and conveyed it in a dramtic way.

Please note that the OP perked up later in this thread and simply thanked people for HEARING her or him.

But keep judging. I see it is working for ya.

Thank you so much for this message. It really means a lot to hear this and the fact you took time to send me this. Thank you In the orgNote sent Mon Feb 13 2017 8:49pm, you said: > On the 'How are you supposed to deal with this?' thread you said: > > > I get it. > I am the same way. > And I'm a 50 year old guy. White, too. > I guess I loved him too and he's always on my mind. > i used to listen to everything. Dylan, Neil Young, Bowie, The who, the Rolling stones, Miles Davis, Dwight yoakam and Willie, Richard Thompson, p funk, funkadelic, I could go on. a varied lot of musical grab bags. > But now it's just Prince. > everyday, all day. > I look for things I haven't heard before and it's getting slim to none for new listens. > My last count was 1658 songs on iTunes that I have of Prince. > Anyway,....I get it. > Me too. > And fuck them that say get some help. you don't need help. > you have a heart.

Uh-huh. And I bet you are one of the people who's been whining since 4/21, "Why oh why oh why didn't the people around Prince heeeeeeeeeellllllllp him?"

I haven't done any whining that I recall. I'm too busy being kind to others.

Maybe you should try it?

mothyham said:

djThunderfunk said:

It is extremely arrogant of you to think a "pat on the back" from you is enough.

Are you in a profession as a counselor, psychologist, clergy or some other field qualified to make that call? It seems clear from the OP that this is a potentially serious situation. Severe depression is a serious condition and requires professional help, not a pat on the back and an orgnote. Both are very kind of you but neither does squat in the long run.

Un-BE-lievable!!

Actually yes, I am a clergical counseling psychiatrist.

Then you should know better.

djThunderfunk said:

mothyham said:

Actually yes, I am a clergical counseling psychiatrist.

Then you should know better.

ok snowflake.

mothyham said:

djThunderfunk said:

Then you should know better.

ok snowflake.

Grow up.

djThunderfunk said:

mothyham said:

djThunderfunk said:

It is extremely arrogant of you to think a "pat on the back" from you is enough.

Are you in a profession as a counselor, psychologist, clergy or some other field qualified to make that call? It seems clear from the OP that this is a potentially serious situation. Severe depression is a serious condition and requires professional help, not a pat on the back and an orgnote. Both are very kind of you but neither does squat in the long run.

Un-BE-lievable!!

Actually yes, I am a clergical counseling psychiatrist.

Warning! Beware of clergy "counselors!"! They are biased as hell and shouldnt be in the counseling biz.

mothyham said:

Iamtheorg said:

find a therapist

I find statements like this to be mean spirited.

I'm sure you have good intentions but.....it doesn't do the OP any good.

I think sending a note of encouragement and brotherhood to be much more inclusive and helpful.

I feel the same way as the OP and to be honest I was shut down and told to "get help" and it just pissed me off.

I really wanted to identify with someone that held similar feelings...I know they're out there.

And instead I was stepped on by an asshole that felt superior.

You go OP.

I'm with you.

I dont care what you find

And stop making it all about YOU