So today I listened to Prince's last concert again and in between the tears I thought about how his death has changed me as a person. I see things differently now Even though Prince took a piece of my heart with him on April 21st it has given me a new outlook on everything. I knew life was short before and none of us know when our time will come, but the whole sad event has made me want to accomplish more and understand that I need to get some things together as a person. I mean finding and wanting a better relationship with a higher power, getting closer to my family and friends and just doing better in life in general. But out of all of those things I now realize that we must put our health and well being first and foremost. We will never know all the details surrounding his death, but I think he would want us to learn from it and strive to do better as people Has his death made you devote more energy to certain things in your life?

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[Edited 7/13/16 16:10pm]

I am hyper-aware of the finite nature of life now, almost to the point of being paranoid that I will die before having accomplished all I wish to. I don't have huge goals, really. My main goal is to meet a woman and have a relationship. I am disabled and very self-conscious; I'm in my mid-30s and have never had a girlfriend. I don't want to die lonely.

Health wise I have. I've "let myself go" this past year or so, and I was already to a point that I knew I wanted to do better but still hadn't put in the effort. I noticed (actually just realized this due to this thread) that I didn't kick things into gear until after he passed. It must have been a subconscious thing. Proud to say I'm 6lbs down. Nothing major, but it's an accomplishment and I hope that I can stick to it for as long as possible. There was also a reverse effect his passing had on me. I'm a big worrywart when it comes to "finding the one", "when will I finally get married" blah blah blah. It hasn't bothered me much since. Sort of a "when it happens, it happens" outlook now. I'm more focused on myself than trying to find someone else.

[Edited 7/13/16 17:22pm]

As Jesse Johnson said, "shock to the system"!

leslievette said:

Health wise I have. I've "let myself go" this past year or so, and I was already to a point that I knew I wanted to do better but still hadn't put in the effort. I noticed (actually just realized this due to this thread) that I didn't kick things into gear until after he passed. It must have been a subconscious thing. Proud to say I'm 6lbs down. Nothing major, but it's an accomplishment and I hope that I can stick to it for as long as possible. There was also a reverse effect his passing had on me. I'm a big worrywart when it comes to "finding the one", "when will I finally get married" blah blah blah. It hasn't bothered me much since. Sort of a "when it happens, it happens" outlook now. I'm more focused on myself than trying to find someone else.

Good for you. Keep at it.

bluefish said:

I am hyper-aware of the finite nature of life now, almost to the point of being paranoid that I will die before having accomplished all I wish to. I don't have huge goals, really. My main goal is to meet a woman and have a relationship. I am disabled and very self-conscious; I'm in my mid-30s and have never had a girlfriend. I don't want to die lonely.

His death really has made me more aware that it cant be escaped...I think about it more now. I understand your need to be in a relationship, but trust me Ive been married and happily divorced...U can be happy without it I know being disabled you just want somebody to love and be there for you...I think I started to feel different like that in my 30s too You'll be fine

leslievette said:

Health wise I have. I've "let myself go" this past year or so, and I was already to a point that I knew I wanted to do better but still hadn't put in the effort. I noticed (actually just realized this due to this thread) that I didn't kick things into gear until after he passed. It must have been a subconscious thing. Proud to say I'm 6lbs down. Nothing major, but it's an accomplishment and I hope that I can stick to it for as long as possible. There was also a reverse effect his passing had on me. I'm a big worrywart when it comes to "finding the one", "when will I finally get married" blah blah blah. It hasn't bothered me much since. Sort of a "when it happens, it happens" outlook now. I'm more focused on myself than trying to find someone else.

[Edited 7/13/16 17:22pm]

I applaud you Leslie 6 lbs is a great start. I had lost about 30 lbs 2 years ago and got lax and gained it all back Im determined to try again and stick with it this time When U stop looking for "that someone" they suddenly appear from nowhere Dont worry it'll happen

jhon00 said:

As Jesse Johnson said, "shock to the system"!

It definitely was I mean it messed me up there for awhile.

breakdown2k14 said:

Its changed my outlook a lot.I now realize tomorrow isn't promised and I better do whatever I need or want to do on this earth while I'm still here.

I was thinking the same thing...I mean people are dying younger and younger so we better get to whatever we need to do fast

AnonymousFan said:

Like some kind of the people said already, it's almost made me mortal - like I feel like I have to be careful now because something could happen to me. I don't feel as invincible as I did before. But, I know I'm supposed to do great things in this world before I go and I feel the higher power has promised me the years until I do. So, I have a weird contradictory feeling now. It's also like all that's good in the world started to fall apart when it happened and now things will never be as bright. It's irreparable. Most people are mediocre, they care about nothing really, and they're letting the wrong people who care and aren't mediocre with the wrong ambitions gas us towards a cliff. The revelation's coming and I hope it comes soon enough. That's what my external outlook has become. We are trapped in darkness.

I feel like things are darker now also...I mean look at the ugly things that have happened in the world since Prince passed I mean his life and his music were a bright spot for me in all that and now that light is gone...sad really.

When I was 17, I was diagnosed with a condition that took my mom when she was 29 and her mom when grandma was 25. I thought it was a death sentence for me. I have been told that if a large enough clot breaks loose and goes to my heart or lungs, I have 10 minutes and there isn't anything that can be done. I have had doctors telling me for years, "You know you can die from this at any time right?" At first, I went through life after my diagnosis, terrified that I would die at any time. I was scared to do anything. The clots could kill me, the treatment (blood thinners) could kill me. If I got into a wreck, I could bleed out before help arrived. I've lived for 33 years knowing these things. Eventually, I got to a place where I asked myself, "If these are my last 10 minutes, do I want to live them in fear that they might be my last?" And the answer to that is, "no, I don't." So now, I live each 10 minutes as though they are my last 10 minutes, loving those I love, helping others when I can, giving back to the people and the world around me. No, Prince's death didn't cause me to change my outlook on my life, but knowing my last 10 minutes could happen any second did. It's the same for all of us. Each and every one of us, this could be our last 10 minutes. Did you love hard enough? Did you dance enough? Did you give to those around you to help make their lives better? Did you celebrate Life? I had to face my own mortality at a very young age, but I didn't stop living and loving. In fact, I embraced the life I have and love as though it's my last moment on earth.

benni said:

When I was 17, I was diagnosed with a condition that took my mom when she was 29 and her mom when grandma was 25. I thought it was a death sentence for me. I have been told that if a large enough clot breaks loose and goes to my heart or lungs, I have 10 minutes and there isn't anything that can be done. I have had doctors telling me for years, "You know you can die from this at any time right?" At first, I went through life after my diagnosis, terrified that I would die at any time. I was scared to do anything. The clots could kill me, the treatment (blood thinners) could kill me. If I got into a wreck, I could bleed out before help arrived. I've lived for 33 years knowing these things. Eventually, I got to a place where I asked myself, "If these are my last 10 minutes, do I want to live them in fear that they might be my last?" And the answer to that is, "no, I don't." So now, I live each 10 minutes as though they are my last 10 minutes, loving those I love, helping others when I can, giving back to the people and the world around me. No, Prince's death didn't cause me to change my outlook on my life, but knowing my last 10 minutes could happen any second did. It's the same for all of us. Each and every one of us, this could be our last 10 minutes. Did you love hard enough? Did you dance enough? Did you give to those around you to help make their lives better? Did you celebrate Life? I had to face my own mortality at a very young age, but I didn't stop living and loving. In fact, I embraced the life I have and love as though it's my last moment on earth.

You know what...this is just beautiful. It shows that we should strive to be happy in this world no matter what and we all think we have issues and problems, but there is always someone with bigger problems that make your issues seem so small. I think we all need to strive to live like that 10 minutes is our last and Im glad that you can live life and enjoy it despite your circumstances. I wonder though how you put that out of your mind and focus on other stuff?

nursev said:

benni said:

When I was 17, I was diagnosed with a condition that took my mom when she was 29 and her mom when grandma was 25. I thought it was a death sentence for me. I have been told that if a large enough clot breaks loose and goes to my heart or lungs, I have 10 minutes and there isn't anything that can be done. I have had doctors telling me for years, "You know you can die from this at any time right?" At first, I went through life after my diagnosis, terrified that I would die at any time. I was scared to do anything. The clots could kill me, the treatment (blood thinners) could kill me. If I got into a wreck, I could bleed out before help arrived. I've lived for 33 years knowing these things. Eventually, I got to a place where I asked myself, "If these are my last 10 minutes, do I want to live them in fear that they might be my last?" And the answer to that is, "no, I don't." So now, I live each 10 minutes as though they are my last 10 minutes, loving those I love, helping others when I can, giving back to the people and the world around me. No, Prince's death didn't cause me to change my outlook on my life, but knowing my last 10 minutes could happen any second did. It's the same for all of us. Each and every one of us, this could be our last 10 minutes. Did you love hard enough? Did you dance enough? Did you give to those around you to help make their lives better? Did you celebrate Life? I had to face my own mortality at a very young age, but I didn't stop living and loving. In fact, I embraced the life I have and love as though it's my last moment on earth.

You know what...this is just beautiful. It shows that we should strive to be happy in this world no matter what and we all think we have issues and problems, but there is always someone with bigger problems that make your issues seem so small. I think we all need to strive to live like that 10 minutes is our last and Im glad that you can live life and enjoy it despite your circumstances. I wonder though how you put that out of your mind and focus on other stuff?

Very easily. I don't fear death. I'm not worried about the end, I'm living the now. At first, it was very difficult to put it out of my mind. They diagnosed me with anti-thrombin III deficiency many years ago, which is extremely rare. I was in and out of the hospital with new DVTs and PEs, numerous, numerous of both. To be honest, I probably should be dead by now with the number of clots that ran from my ankle, up past my groin. Back then they could only measure to the groin, venagrams wouldn't measure higher (thank GOD for dopplers!), but we know they went higher, as I had to have stents placed in my illiac above my groin because I was developing collateral veins in my stomach, which indicated blockage from scar tissue from the old clots. Per the report, they had a hard time placing the stent due to the damage, and ended up having to place 3 stents. And 3/4 of my left lung was scar tissued from the clots and 1/4 of the right lung. So, I got lucky. I just eventually got to a place where I knew I was going to die (we all are) but I was not going to let it control me or my life, and no longer feared it once I made that choice. If you fear death, you tend to worry about the dying and it remains this little nagging thought in the back of your head. But once you release that fear, it frees you.

nursev said:

I applaud you Leslie 6 lbs is a great start. I had lost about 30 lbs 2 years ago and got lax and gained it all back Im determined to try again and stick with it this time When U stop looking for "that someone" they suddenly appear from nowhere Dont worry it'll happen

Thank you! I'm in a similar situation. I lost 30 as well after I graduated college but I've slowly put 15 back on Time to get it back off and keep it off for good. I know you have it in you too!

Oh and in 2000, I was retested and told it isn't anti-thrombin III deficiency, but the cause is unknown. They only know that it is hereditary and passes from mom to daughter (but not always). My sister has never had a clot, and other women in my family aren't effected.

benni said:

nursev said:

You know what...this is just beautiful. It shows that we should strive to be happy in this world no matter what and we all think we have issues and problems, but there is always someone with bigger problems that make your issues seem so small. I think we all need to strive to live like that 10 minutes is our last and Im glad that you can live life and enjoy it despite your circumstances. I wonder though how you put that out of your mind and focus on other stuff?

Very easily. I don't fear death. I'm not worried about the end, I'm living the now. At first, it was very difficult to put it out of my mind. They diagnosed me with anti-thrombin III deficiency many years ago, which is extremely rare. I was in and out of the hospital with new DVTs and PEs, numerous, numerous of both. To be honest, I probably should be dead by now with the number of clots that ran from my ankle, up past my groin. Back then they could only measure to the groin, venagrams wouldn't measure higher (thank GOD for dopplers!), but we know they went higher, as I had to have stents placed in my illiac above my groin because I was developing collateral veins in my stomach, which indicated blockage from scar tissue from the old clots. Per the report, they had a hard time placing the stent due to the damage, and ended up having to place 3 stents. And 3/4 of my left lung was scar tissued from the clots and 1/4 of the right lung. So, I got lucky. I just eventually got to a place where I knew I was going to die (we all are) but I was not going to let it control me or my life, and no longer feared it once I made that choice. If you fear death, you tend to worry about the dying and it remains this little nagging thought in the back of your head. But once you release that fear, it frees you.

U have truly been blessed to survive all that...Im proud of you for not letting that make you lose your will to live because it easily could have. I guess we all fear death or the not knowing what happens after you die part

leslievette said:

nursev said:

I applaud you Leslie 6 lbs is a great start. I had lost about 30 lbs 2 years ago and got lax and gained it all back Im determined to try again and stick with it this time When U stop looking for "that someone" they suddenly appear from nowhere Dont worry it'll happen

Thank you! I'm in a similar situation. I lost 30 as well after I graduated college but I've slowly put 15 back on Time to get it back off and keep it off for good. I know you have it in you too!

why does it come back with a vengeance though?

benni said:

Oh and in 2000, I was retested and told it isn't anti-thrombin III deficiency, but the cause is unknown. They only know that it is hereditary and passes from mom to daughter (but not always). My sister has never had a clot, and other women in my family aren't effected.

So it skipped your sister but went to you?

rainbowchild said:

Carpe diem-- Seize the day! #YOLO

I guess that sums it up Try to seize every minute

I've always been really paranoid about death. Not knowing when or how it will happen was constantly in the back of my mind. It had been a while since I heard "Let's Go Crazy", so I took a listen. It was almost like hearing the song for the first time with fresh new ears. Prince to me has always made the idea of Heaven seem like a complete Utopia. Sure, I've heard about Heaven since I was a child, but I felt like I hadn't heard about it the way Prince was painting the pitcure. Since his death, I've had this "I want to be the best" at whatever I do in life attitude. He has put a fire in me, given me a push that I didn't even know I was looking for. There are so many crazy things going on in the world, I wish he were here to offer guidance and funk to forget about all the madness. We miss you Prince! But I know wherever you are, "You can always see the sun, day or night" <3

[Edited 7/13/16 20:07pm]

nursev said:

benni said:

Oh and in 2000, I was retested and told it isn't anti-thrombin III deficiency, but the cause is unknown. They only know that it is hereditary and passes from mom to daughter (but not always). My sister has never had a clot, and other women in my family aren't effected.

So it skipped your sister but went to you?

My sister is younger, but essentially, yes. I'm just praying my daughter will not have it. However, I have medical directions written out for her. No birth control pills. Has to take heparin or lovenox shots while pregnant, up to 6 months after delivery, any swelling in the leg must be seen to immediately, etc.

bluefish said:

Good for you. Keep at it.

Thank you!

nursev said:

leslievette said:

Thank you! I'm in a similar situation. I lost 30 as well after I graduated college but I've slowly put 15 back on Time to get it back off and keep it off for good. I know you have it in you too!

why does it come back with a vengeance though?

Right?! I took "before" photos a few weeks ago and was shocked. It's time for this fat to go lol

benni said:

When I was 17, I was diagnosed with a condition that took my mom when she was 29 and her mom when grandma was 25. I thought it was a death sentence for me. I have been told that if a large enough clot breaks loose and goes to my heart or lungs, I have 10 minutes and there isn't anything that can be done. I have had doctors telling me for years, "You know you can die from this at any time right?" At first, I went through life after my diagnosis, terrified that I would die at any time. I was scared to do anything. The clots could kill me, the treatment (blood thinners) could kill me. If I got into a wreck, I could bleed out before help arrived. I've lived for 33 years knowing these things. Eventually, I got to a place where I asked myself, "If these are my last 10 minutes, do I want to live them in fear that they might be my last?" And the answer to that is, "no, I don't." So now, I live each 10 minutes as though they are my last 10 minutes, loving those I love, helping others when I can, giving back to the people and the world around me. No, Prince's death didn't cause me to change my outlook on my life, but knowing my last 10 minutes could happen any second did. It's the same for all of us. Each and every one of us, this could be our last 10 minutes. Did you love hard enough? Did you dance enough? Did you give to those around you to help make their lives better? Did you celebrate Life? I had to face my own mortality at a very young age, but I didn't stop living and loving. In fact, I embraced the life I have and love as though it's my last moment on earth.

Thank you for your powerful testament to love and life.

benni said:

When I was 17, I was diagnosed with a condition that took my mom when she was 29 and her mom when grandma was 25. I thought it was a death sentence for me. I have been told that if a large enough clot breaks loose and goes to my heart or lungs, I have 10 minutes and there isn't anything that can be done. I have had doctors telling me for years, "You know you can die from this at any time right?" At first, I went through life after my diagnosis, terrified that I would die at any time. I was scared to do anything. The clots could kill me, the treatment (blood thinners) could kill me. If I got into a wreck, I could bleed out before help arrived. I've lived for 33 years knowing these things. Eventually, I got to a place where I asked myself, "If these are my last 10 minutes, do I want to live them in fear that they might be my last?" And the answer to that is, "no, I don't." So now, I live each 10 minutes as though they are my last 10 minutes, loving those I love, helping others when I can, giving back to the people and the world around me. No, Prince's death didn't cause me to change my outlook on my life, but knowing my last 10 minutes could happen any second did. It's the same for all of us. Each and every one of us, this could be our last 10 minutes. Did you love hard enough? Did you dance enough? Did you give to those around you to help make their lives better? Did you celebrate Life? I had to face my own mortality at a very young age, but I didn't stop living and loving. In fact, I embraced the life I have and love as though it's my last moment on earth.

Such strength and positivity, that's beautiful.

bluefish said:

I am hyper-aware of the finite nature of life now, almost to the point of being paranoid that I will die before having accomplished all I wish to. I don't have huge goals, really. My main goal is to meet a woman and have a relationship. I am disabled and very self-conscious; I'm in my mid-30s and have never had a girlfriend. I don't want to die lonely.

Here's hoping you find a lovely lady, one day, bluefish. Try all the dating sites and see what happens. I used to do the Yahoo.com dating site but it doesn't exist, anymore.

I ain't dating anyone either right now but I'm confident that I'll find a lady...and soon.

Don't give up. As P would say "Make Your Mama Happy...stand up high...touch the clouds..."

I've had enough deaths in my life, that Prince's one didn't really change anything about how I look at life now. I've long learned that death happens, that just a fact of life. It doesn't matter if you're ready for it or not, at some time it life, it will happen to someone you know.