Since, it happened I spent the first 3 days lying and bed and crying all the time watching his movies and music videos non-stop. I was actually scared to stop watching them because I thought if I did he would actually "die" irl. Every time I watch footage, I forget that it's happened. By the 8th day I was back to my regular eating patterns and going through the motions of life, but it was still with this emptiness under the surface. I still have the emptiness, I just think I've been able to ignore it to an extent. I've been able to laugh and joke around again in recent days - still with the emptiness, though. I've been able to speak about him without having and issues and I've been able to do almost everything I did beforehand except listen to political commentary or be on Twitter for some reason. It sounds dumb, but it's been really hard for me to get back into listening to political commentary since it happened for some reason.

When I spend too much time away from the org, I get this feeling like something is wrong and just *have* to come back here and check on things. I spend really long periods of time going down threads reading everything and when I've exhausted everything I wanted to read on here, I refresh and check again until it's kind of stagnate. I feel really dumb about it, but... you know. There have also been these dumb times where I see something pretty (today it was a tree with white blosoms on it while a particular area of campus looked picturesqe) and I "feel" like Prince is alive - like it hasn't happened for a literal second. Then, there are these other times (random) where I just feel a pang of sadness for another literal second. It's not the kind where you break down and cry; it's the kind you get when you're told something you never wanted to hear - shock almost, like waking up from a dream and realizing it wasn't real, but sharper, more abrupt - intrusive almost.

I've been really "blah" on the inside. I'm not exactly enjoying things like I was, but I'm going through the same motions, actions, and reactions anyway. I don't quite feel too good, but I don't feel too bad either outside of the emotional pangs - somewhere in between and it's not the greatest.

I'm right there with ya. Everything you described to a T. I mentioned something similar in another thread, I can't stop listening to him and I think it's because if I do I'll really feel like he's gone. We're just looking for something to grasp and hold on to. Just these past few days I've been able to joke around a little bit as well, but I still feel empty. So thankful for the org and people like you who get it. Somehow we'll make it through

You are not alone. There's been this emptiness since it happened. I've been listening to the music a lot lately and just really appreciating the profound beauty.

I've been doing the same thing. Going back and forth from here, just checking updates and any new information. This is probably the most time I've spent on the org..but I've enjoyed reading everyone's stories and memories. That's helping me get through. Once the official autopsy results are revealed, I think that will bring a little closure to me. I'm still gonna feel like like I've lost a close friend, a family member, my musical mentor...but the results will help.

I've accepted that he is gone, but still haven't gotten completely over it. There's a deep sadness that not only is he gone, but there will never be anyone like him again. It feels like a part of me died along with him. His music is still here but its like an empty vessel, there's nothing new to come. His music is no longer a living, breathing entity that is growing and changing. It just sucks.

Im trying not to focus on this guys....it hurts so bad. Prince was apart of my life growing up as he was for us all, but I have to focus on daily life if not this will consume me and I cant let that happen I will miss him always though.

One thing is for sure that music is a wonderful thing...I mean Prince touched all our lives and was a part of us all just through his voice and that is truly beautiful.

I cant stop

My mood has been off and on all day today. Be fine one minute and be a crying mess the next. Right now I'm trying not to cry and it feels like there's a lump in my throat.