Curious to see if anyone out there is dealing with a spouse that knows your level of love for all things Prince, but unable to comprehend what you are feeling in the aftermath of his death.

I'm having issues. My wife has been to countless concerts with me and loved them, but that is all she knows. She can't comprehend what comes with kind of "knowing" the man since '79 (for me at least) and having his music and everything that goes with it and into it, be an integral part of your life for so long. I find I'm having to essentially go it alone as I don't feel like answering the obvious "why" questions that follow any attempt to discuss it. I watched Kevin Smith's video and his thught aling with what I feel and why it elicits feelings that I've never had for someone passing that I didn't know. The only time I've ever felt this level of profound sadness was when Sandy Hook happened.

It's been over a week, and I am steadily coming to grips with it, but I still tend to well up when I watch say, D'Angelo's tribute, or listen to certain songs. When I think of him slumped over in an elevator, I find myself thinking about it way too long. Or when I think about the fact that I'll never hear anywhere near what he did with his guitar, the primal screams, etc.

Mine does, as do my son and daughter. They've been awesome.

My girlfriend and I have been together for a year. I've introduced her to, and she's become quite the fan of, Prince... which wasn't always the case in my relationships. Her empathy, support, understanding and encouragement through this have been phenomenal. She empathizes, even when she can't complete understand it all. But dealing with and going through this together over the last week has allowed her to understand me better as a Man, has in some way brought us closer together, too.

So many people don't see the "softer" side of me. I save that for a select few. I've only cried over the deaths of 3 people. Last time was in 1992. For about 2 minutes. That was a family member. I would not have predicted how hard I took this and could not have anticipated the love she would shower me with during this time.

I'm so grateful and in love with her that it's ridiculous.

BlackandRising said:

Curious to see if anyone out there is dealing with a spouse that knows your level of love for all things Prince, but unable to comprehend what you are feeling in the aftermath of his death.

I'm having issues. My wife has been to countless concerts with me and loved them, but that is all she knows. She can't comprehend what comes with kind of "knowing" the man since '79 (for me at least) and having his music and everything that goes with it and into it, be an integral part of your life for so long. I find I'm having to essentially go it alone as I don't feel like answering the obvious "why" questions that follow any attempt to discuss it. I watched Kevin Smith's video and his thught aling with what I feel and why it elicits feelings that I've never had for someone passing that I didn't know. The only time I've ever felt this level of profound sadness was when Sandy Hook happened.

It's been over a week, and I am steadily coming to grips with it, but I still tend to well up when I watch say, D'Angelo's tribute, or listen to certain songs. When I think of him slumped over in an elevator, I find myself thinking about it way too long. Or when I think about the fact that I'll never hear anywhere near what he did with his guitar, the primal screams, etc.

Yes. My wife knows a part of me died with Prince.

i feel so lucky to have a partner who has always understood my love for Prince.

now he understands the pain of loving him too.

it's great to hear that others have someone that understands. I mean, my wife kind of understands..or to be more precise, understood, but the fact that I'm still apt to glaze over while watching a performance, or hear a song, she reaches a point where she's unable to digest that I'm distraught over someone I didn't know on a personal level. She was great the first and 2nd day, but after that she became a little less empathetic. It might be her job which is highly stressful right now, but it still sucks.

This is a great question to ask and a kind way for us to hold each other up during these rough days.

I am fortunate enough to be married to a woman who, after 19 years, is more than used to me being disrupted by "Prince things." She was more or less endoctrinated when I spent our first wedding anniversary standing in line to by Prince concert tickets and shocked by the amount I was willing to pay for them.

"Is this going to be an ongoing thing? she asked, after I followed up that ticket purchase with a few pricey eBay acquisitions. "Yup," I told her. And she's been kind enough to roll with it since. She doesn't listen to Prince and considers music in general to be "background noise," though she's come with me to two of Prince's shows and has admitted that she "gets it" after each one.

Having said all of this, she's struggling a little with me right now. She watched me burst into tears in the car the other day when Sirius XM Channel 50 played "Let's Go Crazy" and I told her that I couldn't listen to that one yet and changed the channel. She's been trying to pull me out of my home office where I've barricaded myself lately re-cataloguing my collection. She's started to shake her head at the fact that I have worn purple every day since this happened. (I told her that the most intense part of my grieving period will be "17 days, and 17 long nights.")

I have a supportive spouse. She's very sad for ME. But I hope I start to cope better soon...I don't want to wear her down too much!

Musze said:

My girlfriend and I have been together for a year. I've introduced her to, and she's become quite the fan of, Prince... which wasn't always the case in my relationships. Her empathy, support, understanding and encouragement through this have been phenomenal. She empathizes, even when she can't complete understand it all.

Same for me word for word! She gets it but I found it more comforting to discuss this on FB and here with fellow fans, and anyway I usually deal with mourning better alone, which is why I didn't see her or anyone else the whole last weekend, and she understood. We discussed it more yesterday, I felt more like discussing it with her after a few days. She fell in love with HitnRun Phase II last December and asked for all his albums afterwards, she's quite into him now.

DarkKnight1 said:

Yes. My wife knows a part of me died with Prince.

That is how I feel. I have not stopped wearing my big ass symbol to feel close to him. My hubs - not sure. He did on the day and after but now he is getting a little weary.

Everyone keeps asking how I am feeling and it ags me as I think I am not sick you know.. sigh. .

Kacey725 said:

This is a great question to ask and a kind way for us to hold each other up during these rough days.

I am fortunate enough to be married to a woman who, after 19 years, is more than used to me being disrupted by "Prince things." She was more or less endoctrinated when I spent our first wedding anniversary standing in line to by Prince concert tickets and shocked by the amount I was willing to pay for them.

"Is this going to be an ongoing thing? she asked, after I followed up that ticket purchase with a few pricey eBay acquisitions. "Yup," I told her. And she's been kind enough to roll with it since. She doesn't listen to Prince and considers music in general to be "background noise," though she's come with me to two of Prince's shows and has admitted that she "gets it" after each one.

Having said all of this, she's struggling a little with me right now. She watched me burst into tears in the car the other day when Sirius XM Channel 50 played "Let's Go Crazy" and I told her that I couldn't listen to that one yet and changed the channel. She's been trying to pull me out of my home office where I've barricaded myself lately re-cataloguing my collection. She's started to shake her head at the fact that I have worn purple every day since this happened. (I told her that the most intense part of my grieving period will be "17 days, and 17 long nights.")

I have a supportive spouse. She's very sad for ME. But I hope I start to cope better soon...I don't want to wear her down too much!

This is in line with what I'm experiencing. She was cool up to a point, but one day when I wouldn't get out of the bed early, or stay at home to work, but not work, he started to be less understanding. Maybe it's because she know that if she doesn't say anything I'm liable to remain in a funk.

Yes, my husband has been very supportive, thankfully. He knows how much Prince and his music means to me, but the crying I've done past the first day or two after his death was announced, Ive been sort of hiding. I mean I feel kind of silly doing it and I don't want to have to explain. But all the updates and stuff, he's been interested in as he was a fan also (mostly because of me), just not as die hard as I am. But he understands my grief.

This is a great question. I'm like you, BlackandRising. My wife sort of gets it. We saw the man probably 15X in the 15 years we've known each other and we got so phenomenally excited every time. But I was sitting in the parking lot at the supermarket last Saturday and Siri/XM "The Groove" went from Morris Day's "Fishnet" to "Goodbye" off Crystall Ball. I looked up at the screen in my car and saw "Prince: Goodbye." I'm glad she was still in the store; she would've thought my tears were a crazy man's. I'm also surprised by how hard it's hit me. It's made me think of my 17 year old self at the PR show - my first - and knowing it's really all over. I pretended it never would be.

ALLMACK said:

This is a great question. I'm like you, BlackandRising. My wife sort of gets it. We saw the man probably 15X in the 15 years we've known each other and we got so phenomenally excited every time. But I was sitting in the parking lot at the supermarket last Saturday and Siri/XM "The Groove" went from Morris Day's "Fishnet" to "Goodbye" off Crystall Ball. I looked up at the screen in my car and saw "Prince: Goodbye." I'm glad she was still in the store; she would've thought my tears were a crazy man's. I'm also surprised by how hard it's hit me. It's made me think of my 17 year old self at the PR show - my first - and knowing it's really all over. I pretended it never would be.

yeah man, same timeline here...we've been together since 2000, married in 2004, and at first she was like wtf is this guy about with Prince? Cause I made it know that to be with me, you will be hearing lots of Prince and I will be hipping you to what he's about every chance i get. After the first concert, she understood a little more. I remember once we were in Paris for vacation and I heard on the radio that Prince was in town for a one off concert. We were shopping for clothes, and when I heard it, EVERYTHING was put on hold vacation-wise, went back to the room, got on the computer, and proceeded to get intel. I had her running around Paris like a madman; trying to get to the hotel he was supposed to do an interview at (turned out to be around the corner where we were staying but was empty when we got there) and finally when that didn't work out, waiting in line at the venue to see him. And it was raining. She was thoroughly pissed until we saw the concert, all was forgiven and the rest of the vacation was fantastic. But up to that point I think she ws contemplating leaving my ass!! After that going to concerts when he was nearby was a no-brainer. But yeah, when she came home on the 21st to see me with headphones on laying in bed (she was the one to call and break the news earlier that day), I broke the fuck down when I saw her, and she understood in that moment. I think she may have thought I was crazy. I know I did, as it was the oddest and most profound sadness I think I have ever felt outside of a family member dying.

Yes she has been a sweetheart and said only Prince could bring a man to tears> ME.

Militant said:

My girlfriend and I met because of Prince, so, yes.....

Ditto. My husband and I met through HQ - so yeah he gets it

Definitely - my husband was really sweet. When I called him crying from a phone room at work, he was really comforting.

He also put up with 3 straight hours of Prince at a BBQ, was just shuffling my whole library. He's always kind of respected Prince without really enjoying him. He was cooking in the kitchen and I asked him if he was getting sick of it, and he looked me, with some definite emotion in his eyes, and said, "I totally get it, it's like 18 artists in one."

I think that the fairest answer is...that she kind of does. She knows that Prince meant so much to me and she's been great. But I don't think she REALLY gets it but that's okay too. She's been here for me during my ever changing moods over his passing.

Oh, and she's my long-time girlfriend, not wife, but as close as I have to a spouse...

[Edited 4/29/16 14:06pm]

[Edited 4/29/16 14:07pm]

[Edited 4/29/16 14:09pm]

SteelPulse1 said:

Shit I dont understand what im going thru

I was really concerned about how my fiance,' who is 15 years younger than me, at the age of 32, would respond to my grief. Heck, even I didn't realize I was going to grieve like this. However, I have used the opportunity to share why Prince meant so much to me. How as a young girl, coming of age, his songs spoke to all the things I was discovering about myself. How Prince is tied into my ideas of love, sex, music, funk, faith...just intertwined with my being. Thankfully, he has listened to me go on and on, comforted me, and even endured three hours of obscure Prince tunes on a recent trip out of town. Now, he has incredible respect for Prince, and even cried along with me last night as I brought myself to finally watch the D'Angelo/Princess tribute on Fallon.

My ex husband would NEVER have gotten it. He even disconnected our satellite service as a prank before the 2007 Super Bowl, bc I was so excited to see Prince. And the ex was 15 years OLDER than me, and should have known a true musician.

I'm still crying off and on...glad to know that others on this forum and around the world feel the grief. Never thought I would mourn someone I had never met...but yet, Prince was intimate with ALL of us, through the beauty of his music.

Mine has been completely and totally supportive and non-judgemental. She even brought me purple roses a few hours after the news broke. Brought them right to my office. She understands the guy has been a MAJOR influence on my life for over 30-plus years, and that it wasn't just another celebrity who passed to me. She understood it was almost like family, and I'll forever love her for that...

SteelPulse1 said:

Shit I dont understand what im going thru

That too. I'm uterly confused as well. Good point...

SometimesIwonder said: