Prince is awesome because every time some dude looked at that tiny man in a mauve suit and called him queer, he probably went home and banged an entire metric shit-ton of ass. Plus 1999 just gets more relevant with each passing year.

Back in the day, Prince had his own store in London because where else were people who wanted a little latex version of Prince wrapped around their junk going to buy his brand of condoms? Were they supposed to have sex using some kind of non-horrifying contraceptive or something? Pfft.

Almost as popular his line of “raspberry beret” hemorrhoid pillows.

As it happens, in the 1990s, Prince marketed the hilariously named Purple Raincoats for guys who couldn’t wait until after climax to make women regret having sex with them. The condoms came packaged in CD cases and featured Prince’s face right there on the outside, a constant reminder of not only why contraception was important, but that it was possible Prince touched that condom with his own hands and now, by the transitive properties of handjobs, was basically finger banging your girlfriend right now. This is what it sounds like when doves cry indeed.

Number 7 - Purple Raincoats
http://www.cracked.com/bl...d-products


[Edited 4/26/10 17:32pm]