I had a dream last night where Prince was playing a show at Blackpool Pleasure Beach by the side of one of the rides. There were a lot of people there listening but the stage itself was in a little courtyard.

Me and my wife fought our way through the crowd and to our surprise there was hardly anyone in the courtyard itself. Prince was performing without a band so we went over to chat to him. What a nice fella, we had a cracking chat with him.

This got me thinking, 21 nights at the o2 arena in London was impressive but wouldn’t it be more impressive if Prince did a number of shows in the same town/city but in a different place each time.

That’s why I think Prince should play Blackpool repeatedly in 2010. The possibilities are endless.

The first show would take place on The Big One rollercoaster; this could be one of the few times where the crowd completely drown out the sound of the amplified music through screams of terror and excitement. Nobody would complain if this was a short show as nausea would eventually overcome even the most dedicated Purple Warrior.

To cool things down, concert number two would be at Blackpool Ice Rink, there the band would play whilst sliding round the arena, the big surprise would be veteran saxophonist Maceo Parker surprising everybody with fantastic splits. The concert would sadly end abruptly though as Prince accidentally collides with a stretching Baloo from the Disney On Ice show due on after Prince. After slapping the bear repeatedly and being led away by security, Prince returns with an ice hockey stick and batters Baloo with it.

The third show would restore some much needed class and dignity to the series of concerts. It would take place in Blackpool Tower’s Ballroom. Prince delights the crowd by playing Wurlitzer organ versions of ‘Sign O The Times’ and less impressively ‘Wedding Feast’. Attendees have to ballroom dance throughout the whole show.

Show number 4 and Prince is on the move. Yes, he is on Blackpool Beach atop a galloping Donkey. Lots of fans miss out on this as Mr Goggins; the donkey owner says only children and the underweight are allowed to ride the donkeys. Prince is seen disappearing over the horizon singing a poignant ‘Wonderful Ass’ to his new donkey friend.

After the controversy of fans missing show 4, number 5 takes place in a Fish and Chip Shop. The Ultimate Interactive Live Experience sees Prince personally sprinkle salt and vinegar on his fan’s chips. When introducing the band he gives a special shout out to ‘Renato Neto on the deep fat fryer’.

The next show is an intimate, tasteful affair. Prince is onboard one of those glowing, electric trams on the promenade. The lucky few who are onboard with him hear him combine songs with a guided tour such as ‘I guess I should have known by the way you parked your car sideways that it wouldn’t last (AND ON YOUR RIGHT LADIES AND GENTLEMAN THE SEALIFE CENTRE)

Show 7 is a special night for the superstitious funkster. All fans have to go through the revolving entrance doors seven times, have the number seven painted on them, keep saying the number seven until they get into the venue itself, that’s right, it’s Blackpool’s indoor waterworld The Sandcastle. As an encore, Prince bombs down a water flume slide kamikaze style whilst gargling ‘Forever In My Life’ and loses his trunks upon re-entry.

The 8th show is adults only, is Prince swearing again? No, it’s a frighttime show onboard Blackpool’s Ghost Train. Support act is alleged real ghost ‘Cloggy’ or ‘Mr Clogs’. Fans ride round the ghost train in little cars with Prince periodically emerging from the gloom to scream ‘oooh-wah’ then run back giggling into the shadows. A more experimental show that gets trashed by the critics although fans love the inclusion of ‘There’s Others Here With Us’.

The best show is saved to last. Prince switches on Blackpool Illuminations in a suit covered in fibre optic lights. Prince is Fibre Optic Man! Surrounded by lights and lasers, Prince ends his epic series of concerts doing a cracking high energy disco version of ‘Sometimes It Snows In April’.

Prince for Blackpool 2010!

In a word no - but would be happy for him to play anywhere he likes anytime he likes

We forget to mention Glastonblubber 2011.

loved reading your ideas..hope he wears a 'kiss me quick & squeeze me slow' hat throughout the stint

lottielooloo1968 said:

I think he will, I'm pretty sure this is all part of a concept album called 'End Of The Pier' which features guest vocals from The Krankies, Schnorbitz, Gary Wilmot, Les Dennis, Faith Brown, Rustie Lee and Richard Stilgoe. Every CD comes with a free candy floss.

NouveauDance said:

My God, they look like extras from a Romero zombie movie. I can see Prince possibly backing out of this if we're not careful. I'll get on the blower to Blackpool Council.

and only half an hour from ramsbottom...i'm in!!
i could stay the whole week for less than a day in montreux
where would prince stay though.. there is no palace on the prom... maybe a posh place in lytham
also I take it renato will be on the wurlitzer.. i'd pay good money to see that

boxerboy said:

The bandwagon is rolling, http://www.facebook.com/h...986&ref=nf

I believe Prince will be staying at one of the many B&B's in the town. Downstairs, he will have full use of the 1980's Space Invaders machine and will have complimentary Sausage and Egg baps throughout his stay.

genius idea!. get hima full cooked English , stick him of the Big one, followed by a big bag of hot doughnuts, back to tower to watch the circus, tram ride, donkey ride, get his fortune told and if he's a good little P let him have a paddle in the sea!. HA we laugh in the face of Vegas 3121, Blackpools where it's at!!!. Oh and Little Boots is from there as well, perhaps she could reconnect him with his lost synth grooves!!.

HollywoodSt said: