This has bugged me for years

"I met her in a hotel lobby, masturbating with a magazine..."

Was it Prince or Nikki doing the masturbating?

If it was Nikki, was she:

a) having a leisurely strum whilst looking at the pics, or

b) biffing herself with a rolled-up one?...

and if so,

Who was manning reception that day?? The security at this hotel is shocking. And finally

how much is a room?

If there are Paisley Park employees reading this, can you please pop into the studio and ask Prince. Thanks

yeah,those lyrics are outrageous! It's hard to imagine the hotel clerk allowing someone to masturbate in the lobby!

LittleSmedley said:

This is how I interpreted it, but one of my friends in school thought since the lyric started with "I" then Prince must be the one masturbating.

I'd have to say a). The whole point of the song is the dirtiness of Nicki, who teaches Prince how to grind - suggesting he isn't as dirty as her at that point. She's the one that is uninhibited and does such things.

LittleSmedley said:

Nikki is masturbating. He didn't say he was masturbating and met her he said he met her (while she was) masturbating with a magazine.

How does a girl masturbate with a magazine?

Nikki was up to her wrist in her fun-flaps. Prince saw this behavior as number 3 on his checklist of "What I Want In A Girl".

The rest is, of course, history.

ernestsewell said:

Dude you sound exasperated, like you've had to explain this hundreds of times..."for FUCK'S SAKE. I'm not saying this again. NIKKI IS MASTURBATING."

Jakeasaurus said:

The same way a guy does. But with a lady, it probably takes more than 12 seconds. And the pages don't get forever glop-glued together by a torrent of DNA.

squirrelgrease said:

She was mast. in her mind...or looking at it and getting hot ...or touching her nipples...

she was obviously waiting for someone...

My question is: If you masterbate with a magazine, wouldn't you get nasty paper cuts?

LittleSmedley said:

Someone asked about the hotel security.

Prince never said he was strollin' around the Waldorf-Astoria. It doesn't have to be a 5-star place. He could have been in the red-light part of town where that kind of thing is permissable.

That's my

I just think he was in a part of town and it was 3 am, no one was the the receptionist, he was getting in from a late concert , and there Nikki is (a fan who adores Prince) waiting for him by Masturbatin ((rubbing nipples, rubbbing her oooh ahh)) to pics of him in a latest magazine, she eyes Prince out and then asks the question "Howd ya like to spend some time?" ...

Thingz that make u go ...later on ya'll (we have ntirely 2 much time on our handz )

Oh Lord. You guys are hilarious The analytical debate over Darling Nikki

My question was always if she takes him back to HER place, why does she leave her number by the stairs..... Wouldn't she still be there?? And he could look at her phone to get hte # . It's like she was leaving his place to go back home.

u know this thread has made me think of other lyrics that don't exactly make sense like:

"The sun set in the west this mornin'"

and

"I've fallen in love for the first time, this time I know it's for real."

obviously artistic license and listener inattention to detail >>>> logic

This song was what made me tell someone I was going to walk up to a hotel receptionist and go "excuse me, are we allowed to masturbate in this lobby?" And when they go "No." I offer to make a sign like the no smoking ones advising people not to do so in the lobby. Even if their name is Nikki.

squirrelgrease said:

Nikki was up to her wrist in her fun-flaps.


May I use this line? Please! If I'm ever thirsty, I now know how to get a drink thrown in my face. Never heard fun-flaps before.

GaryMF said:

I figured he would be leaving in the middle of the night and she knew he would, so she left her number for him by (her) stairs so he could pick it up as he was walking out

Janfriend said:

But when he left, she wasn't there. He knew this 'cause he looked all over.

FruitToAttractBears said:

I don't know why but that made me laugh hysterically.

Maybe she went to....work.

FruitToAttractBears said:

I just realized that when I typed that. Maybe she had shit to do and just left him there assuming he would eventually leave


Or maybe Prince got confused in his own writing and forgot he said she brought him to her castle and at the end thought she was at his place

Janfriend said:

Well I mean, maybe it WAS his brain that started spinning. That would explain his confusion.

Yes, spinning brains indeed.
[Edited 2/26/07 21:01pm]

squirrelgrease said:

I'm still trying to get over the "wrist deep in her fun flaps" line!

When I first heard the song, I thought Nikki was *inserting* the periodical into...well...forget it.

this thread is hilarious!