Let's start one. I know there was one before,but, whatever.

Riding in his Thunderbird on the freeway, Prince turned on the radio to hear some music play and was shocked to have heard...

Extra Loveable!

Prince: "How the hell did they get a hold of that?? Someone's gonna pay!"

The audacity of Paris Hilton to have included that song on her upcoming album left the purple man seeing red. He picked up his cell phone and called his lawyer and said . . .

Londell, get me some squirrel meat!

Londell "Squirrel meat?

Prince "Yes, squirrel meat?"

Londell "I just caled 8 stores and they're all out of squirrel meat."

Prince "That fine. Squirrel meat comes from a squirrel and a squirrel has eyes, which means it has life such as all of God's creations. Now get me a gun."

Londell "A gun?"

Prince "Yes. A gun."

Londell "What about preserving the life of all of God's creatures?"

Prince "Did u hear how Paris Hilton doo dooed all over my precious music? I love my songs as if they were my own children."

Londell "But you never released Extra Lovable."

Prince "OK...some songs r illigitamate children.Don't try 2 rationalize with me! I'm Prince!"

Before Prince could continue his rant, he was stunned to hear what came on the radio next. It was...

Tamar singing back up on Flavor Pill from the CD Gutter Trash.

Prince couldn't believe it. He called Tamar and....

told her that they would have to re-cut Milk and Honey to include Flavor Pill with himself (of course) playing all the instrutments. This would delay the release to mid-2008.

Tamar was disappointed but decided Prince knew best based on the handling of his own successful album which was hanging strong at #127 on the charts.

Prince promised to buy her more bicycle shorts to perform in and hung up.

Prince then discovered that he had diverted his attention while driving too long because...
[Edited 6/17/06 8:20am]

he ran out of gas. The $312.01 worth of gas he put in his car yesterday had already run out.Prince then decided to hitchhike. Fortunately for him,somebody pulled over. Lo and behold it was non other than...

Paris Hilton!

Paris: "You need a ride?"

Prince: "Oh shit!"

To which Paris Hilton replied.....

"That's hot"

Prince realizing that being in a car with Paris Hilton was just trouble waiting to happen called up Londell again

Prince "I might be out of town for a few days"

Londell "Should I be trying for the squirrel meat again?"

Paris "Oh, don't worry about that, we've got a party to attend"

Prince hangs up and tries to engage in a conversation

Prince "You just caught my interest, what kind of party are you talking about?"

Paris "One where you can perform I'm sure, if you like the crowd"

Prince "I'm not so sure about this"

The car makes a quick turn and pulls up near a hotel and ...

Paris says "How'd you like to waste some time?"

Prince "With who?"

Paris "My sister Nikki.She's waiting for me in the hotel lobby."

Prince "I can't say 'no' 2 that.But first, eye need 2 ask u something very important."

Paris "Let me guess, Do I own my masters?"

Prince "No, eye need 2 know,is Vanity Nicole Ritchie's mom?"

Before Paris could answer they were interrupted by...
[Edited 6/17/06 17:51pm]

Simon Cowell.

Simon:"There you are Prince, I been looking for you since the AI finale."

Prince "Oh Lawd! What do you want Cowell?"

Simon said....

Prince, or whatever you want to call yourself.... Your singing is like that grating on a chalk board, the twinz were a complete distraction, the hairstyle was utter crap. You think you are all that. If you auditioned for AI, buddy I can say this..... you are not going to Hollywood.....

Upon hearing all this nonsense crap from Simon .....

Prince: "I challenge you to a pie-eating contest bitch!"

After overcoming the shock of hearing this, Simon says...

as long as its Paris's pie we are talking about...


just then Paris.....

stopped the car with a screach, hoppety hopped out of her pink mustang, with her miniskirt flopped over her chest instead of her legs, flung open Prince's door, took him by his hand and pushed him into the arms of her sister Nikki.

Prince then screamed: Daaaaarlin' Nikki!
Are you a sex fynd?

Nikki looked at him with big deer eyes (she had her eyes done for her meeting with Prince) and said in her fake French accent: Mais oui my little darrrrling Prince, at which Paris got furious and.....

dialed up Londell on her palm piolet screaming to him....


"Get me that squirel meat.... i have to bitch slap my sister with it for cock blocking, I wanted Prince all for myself. she was suppose to just make me look cool. that traitor." then hung up on him... only to dial Nicole and make like friends saying... "hey Nik... what are the lyrics to baby i'm a star" and Nicole responce was....

....What you talkin' about gurl??!?!!?
Who u with and what u doin?
Are you hanging around that Paris dude again? No, not your sister DUMBO, the GUY PARIS!
Listen gurl, if you really wana have the lyrics to that old haggety song, you gotta tell me what ur up to!

To this, Paris replied:.....

By screaming and running into the room to stop what was going on. To her surprise....

PurpleQueenJ said:

it was Lionel Ritchie

LR "Outrageous!"

Prince "What r u doing here?"

LR "At the Hilton?"

Prince "No...2006?"

LR "Still shouting 'Outrageous!'"

Prince "Hey, did u and Vanity ever...u know?"

LR "Have sex?"

Prince "Um...yeah?"

LR "Unfortunately not!"

Prince "Just making sure."

LR "But I did masterbate to her and it was OUTRAGEOUS!!"

Prince "Anyways..."

LR "Especially when she showed her boobies in Purple Rain!"

Prince "That wasn't Vanity. That was Appolonia."

LR "Really? Wow. No matter whose titties they were,they were OUTRAGEOUS!"

Prince "Speaking of outraged! Have u heared your daughter's friend's blasphemous rendition of...of.."

LR "Extra Lovable?"

Prince "Yes! Eye love that and all of my songs as my children."

LR "I can understand that. Where are Paris and Nicole anyways?"

Suddenly, both singers heard a strange noise. It was...

Paris and Nicole involved in a girl fight. Prince then asked...

suzysue said:

"Why can't we all just get along?" Prince step between the two painfully skinny girls, trying to keep them apart. Unfortunely, Nicole landed an uppercut to Prince's chin sending flying out of his boots.

What happen next was totally unexpected....

Paris kissed Prince and.....
[Edited 6/25/06 21:14pm]

PurpleQueenJ said:

she turned into a frog!

Paris croaked while people looked in disbelief.

"OUTRAGEOUS!!" Lionel Richie exclaimed.

"Daddy, I get to do A Simple Life all by myself now!! This is great." Nicole said excitedly.

"No really honey. You're not the interesting to watch." Lionel said in his best fatherly voice. Lionell then had a great idea.

"Help me carry Prince to my car!!" He instructed his daughter.

"Awww, Do it yourself he's like what...one and a dime?" Nicole reply.

"True." Lionel scooped up prince and flung him over his shoulder, with his other arm he grabbed Nicole and threw her over the other.

"Honey, we got the perfect singer for your wedding now!" Lionel said smiling.

"Plus I have other plans for Mr. Rock-n-Roll-Hall-of-Fame"

WHAT DOES LIONEL RICHIE HAVE PLANNED FOR PRINCE?

WILL PARIS GET A JOB AS THE NEW FROG ON THE WB?

WILL NICOLE EAT A SANDWICH? BECAUSE SHE SURE COULD USE ONE.
STAY TUNED....

"

And then LionEl Rickie busts into song at the foot of Prince.

"Hello, is it Me you're looking for? I can see it in your eyes, I can see it in your smile... I love you..."

MickG said:

prince then revealed the clay sculpture of lionel he had made. even tho it looked like mr potato head on crack rock lionel loved it and said....

Christopher said:

'you know what? I feel compelled to throw this scuplture in the bin - but im not - I think Jeff from the shop that sells stuffed animals might want this as it looks like a puffa fish for chrissakes!!'

It was then that there came an almighty crash from the cupboard under the stairs.....