We all say from time-to-time that we don't care what other people think of us...but, I don't think that's entirely true.
If someone gives you a compliment it lifts your spirits...if someone says you're ugly or inept, you feel bad.
Do you think the motivation for most things we do is to be pleasing to other people or only to ourselves?

Yep.

i think most people want to be appreciated and respected, and if that means caring what others think about them and allowing what others say about them be it positive or negative to affect the way they feel then it isnt a bad thing.most people who spurt on about not caring what anyone thinks of them are usualy lacking in self esteem to me it's a huge front.we all have our protective layers i suppose but we also all have our insecuities.
do i make sense?i'm not the most intelligent writer which is why i dont often reply.there u go there is one of my many insecurities!

It really depends on who we're talking about. I care fiercely about what the people I love think about me. On the otherhand I could care less what fools think of me.

cammille said:

You make total sense

to a certain extent i do. honestly i like myself and am happy about the woman and mother i have become....however...i do want people to like me, think i dress well and look good, and not think i'm as dumb as a post. i think it is more important to love yourself and to be a good person, you know, help old ladies across the street, go to church, donate blood, not beat your kids, but i think you'd be lying if you said you don't give 1 iota of how others perceive you.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

I agree with you...but, what about people that you don't feel either way about?

I'm a Leo, so I just automatically assume people love me madly.

applekisses said:

Probably both!
We all care to a certain extent how other people see us. We all like to dress up and show a confidate side to our personalities when we meet someone or go out. But it's foolish to think that we would please everyone all of the time. There are going to be people who will judge you and not like you for whatever reason they have. The trick is not to worry so much about those people and just be happy about yourself.

Stupid org posted twice!
[This message was edited Mon Jul 26 15:19:37 2004 by althom]

As long as mi mama lubs mi.

applekisses said:

For the most part I don't care what strangers think...

althom said:

I agree. There is a point when it stops being what is pleasing to others and becomes what is actually pleasing to ourselves. There is a balance there. One shouldn't be worried about NOT pleasing others...and I think that's where Supa's point fits in...

Number23 said:

Oh, I'm sure there are others as well...

i do, but it depends entirely on the person.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

I totally agree....it's all about sorting the wheat from the chaff in the content of what is said and the context it is meant.

There is nothing wrong with constructive critisism in the right place...or likewise praise where it is deserved.

Sometimes it can be hard for the individual to see the value of what is being said...and see comments as destructive.

I care about what I think of myself, more than what others do.

I can accept criticism.

It is important to be very careful what you let in! The last one in my life had my head all twisted up! ( I allowed it in!)

I long have advocated to woman that it is foolish to base your opinion of yourself on what others think. Why don't you just hang a mood barometer on your persons? You will swing like a pendulum.

After all, peoples perceptions of you often are based on their perceptions of themselves. That and reflections of past pains and maybe mistreatments they have experienced. I have long said I will know more about you by such actions then the person you are speaking about.

I spent a few months there twisted up. I new I was in trouble when I began to think why can't I be more like her.... Etc.. ( Which was whatever 'her' that was walking through the room that was different then myself.) I am thankful for the experience and the lessons learned within.

For me the answer is ... Go with God.... He happens to like you just the way he created you. Except no imitations! Life is to short to worry about what others think....and if you are busy living and doing you have less time to focus on those and their views. ( If those sort spent half as much of their time trying to make others feel like crap and the same amount of time working on themselves they would be somewhere by now.) Bottom line... If someone feels like crap about themselves then that is what they put forth. If someone is growing and stretching then that is what they put forth.... All depends what kind of soil you have planted yourself in.

It is not to say that at times what is said does not hurt or bother me. I can wear it like a shirt or put it away. I choose to let it drop away from me and God can deal with the rest. I think people think people who act crappie get away with it. Look again, they are the maker of there own demise. They are miserable... I don't wish that on anyone..

Muse2NOPharaoh said:

You're a beautiful lady, Karen.

Hell fuckin' NO critical bastards

BiggestBoooooty said:

applekisses said:

I fink it's only natural to want to please otherz (in as far as what they think of you is concerned)..it's all part of human interraction i suppose . The biggest challenge for some, is learning to not depend on that kind of approval. Depending on other's opinions has as much potential for damage, as it does havin a positive impact!

I think the more you think da world of certain people in your life, da more their opinion kinda counts

I reckon, if you are being motivated in something dat means somethin to you, then it's a good thing..but all in moderation..i hate seein people distrust their own opinions so much dat they have to wait for some one elses approval in order to do nearly every single thing in life. Dat's crap man.
[This message was edited Mon Jul 26 16:45:34 2004 by lilmissmissy]

Yes, I do

althom said:

OMG! Don't even try to blame it on the Org

This thread looks way too familiar.

People should be worried about what I think about them.

Evillol said:

Be afraid..be very afraid!!

Of course we care what people think....that's why people get mad about things others say or do. The thing is, we should all be able to accept constructive criticism.....Most importantly, it is what we think of ourselves that matters the most. If you have a high opinion of urself, without being arrogant, then whatever someone has to say about you will not hurt so bad.

Smooches;)

I think everyone does care.... we all take shit to heart.... it's all about how much you let others affect you. my

CAPTAINBULLSH1T said: