LOL I'm wondering cuz I went to the mall yesterday and found this lil' punk loudmouthing over his moma in some store. I quickly thought of Eddie Griffin's words "You little kids 2day are nothing but bunch of fuck-ups, got no goddamn home training". I know I heard that

I was looking at that shady lil' motherfucker & his mom like "Damn, if that woulda been me? I wouldn't survive to breath while posting this shit. My momma would chase my ass with a car TO HELL".

Boy, was I a bad kid lol whew!

Looking back at it, I'm glad at how tough my momma was with me, I understand the woman. She couldn't it handle it any other way if she wanted to, if you got a stubborn trouble-making lil' midget under yo nose like me, you wouldn't always handle her the easy way lol hell, you might settle them 4 adobtion too.

I chuckle when I see some people look at "ass whooping" as a sign of ABUSE. Abuse? That explains why their kids would cuss them in front of their faces. It woulda been abuse if it ment 4 KEEPING THEM DOWN, but if it ment GETTING THEM UP then where the abuse.

So my ?uestion,,,did you get some exclusive ass-whupping from yo pops? LOL
[This message was edited Sun May 2 12:32:21 2004 by Harlepolis]
[This message was edited Sun May 2 12:33:54 2004 by Harlepolis]

Frequently..and it hurt!

Children should not be hit.

Natsume said:

Why not?

REDFEATHERS said:

Why would you?

Natsume said:

Most definitely if they were naughty, I dont see what is wrong with a slap on the back of the legs or the ass...

REDFEATHERS said:

There are, surely, better (and, arguably, more effective) ways to discipline children than to strike them.

Natsume said:

Oh?

REDFEATHERS said:

Yes, and why the laughter? Do you find violence against children funny?

Natsume said:

Spanking a child to discipline them (how I was spanked when younger) isnt violence... I just find your posts funny!

REDFEATHERS said:

Then god help you if you ever choose to have children... anyway I'm off now so feel free to continue this discussion without me...

I was smacked, yes. I remember running away from my Mum once, giggling because I knew she was gonna smack my bare bottom. She started laughing too!

Natsume said:

Excuse me? That isnt a very nice thing to say Natsume...

I guess you do not approve...

Well guessed RedFeathers even though Natsume clearly didnt wanna hang around to discuss....

Riiiight, lets put her as my mother 4 one week 10 years ago and see how her oh so better and arguably more effective ways to discipline work. I bet with my money if she wouldn't lost all that hair by pulling it

well, i know natsume doesn't have any children but do you, redfeathers?


i don't have children and i don't really have anything to say on this matter. i don't think that children should be beaten to the point where they are black and blue and bloody but i've never seen any damage done to a child who got a smack across the hand.

so if you can find someone else to discuss this with you redfeathers i'll be interested in reading.

funny this topic is here, my friend and i were discussing it yesterday...she is studying to be a teacher, and has read all the 'up to date' ways to get through to a child. this is all well and good, although sometimes we didnt see eye to eye when it came to handling kids, and i always looked at her as being incredibly strong for comming up with all these ways to deal with her child.

HOWEVER, her child has since then gotten older, and the new and improved ways of handling your children have left her feeling a bit helpless and worn down. she called me and presented me with some serious concerns about how to handle the situations that have come up between them, along with her feelings of guilt about wanting to resort to spanking her child. we talked about it for quite sometime, both the way our children feel when they are spanked, and how it makes us feel, you know that old quote, " this hurts me more than it does you ? " well, its very very true. at any rate, what we came up with together, both of us being intelligent, and thoughtful mothers -- both very concerned with the well-being of our children ...is that sometimes you just HAVE to get kids to understand whats right and whats wrong. it is my duty as a mother to teach my kids how to behave and how to get along in the world. there must be consequences in life when you take the wrong actions !

i guess the thing that works for me personally, is that i never spank my kids when im angry. they are not to be used as a tool to get your frustrations out on. i allow myself to calm down, and think it over, does the situation really warrant the use of force ? i dont believe in making this a way to handle all situations, but some are not to be tolerated and i believe that the child needs to know that this will not be allowed. that being said, there are also many other ways to deal with your kids, and i use them regularly, this is referring to the topics that need to be addressed in a way that makes them understand and remember.


a few side notes, i am not a perfect mom, but, i do my very best, and i have 2 wonderful children that i am extremely proud of, my son constantly gets mentions from school for being courteous and polite to those around him, both adult and peer wise...and my daughter is both kind and conciderate in all that she does. the point is, spanking your children is only a very small part of parenting, although, it is a part. the rest should be filled with love, and open discussions, i always have allowed my children to express themselves to me, whether i like it or not, they are allowed to have a voice in our home, and i want them to feel comfortable in sharing it with me.

the second point i wanted to make, although there are many of you that dont have children here, its a bit difficult for you to make judgements on how to raise your kids when you havent gone through it yourself. until you give your all everyday, day in and day out, you will never be able to understand what it feels like to be a parent, both the good and the not so good.

I was only spanked once in my life. I didn't deserve it.

I do spank my kids when needed.

nakedpianoplayer said:

well said and very true.

nakedpianoplayer said:

I'm a mother myself too and I raise my kids like my momma raised me to be but I'm ALOT easier on them than my mother was with me cuz they're not lil' fuck-ups like me when I was a kid, the aquarious/political way didn't exactly work 4 me(or most kids who grew up in the projects/ghettos).

It wasn't like *WHOOP* *WHOOP* out of the blue, there were strikes b4 that of course and when the nice way doesn't work with them, well hey do what you gotta do in order 4 them to do the right thing and keep away out of troubles/

In my case(and many rowdy young kids like I was) pain give you a memory of what NOT to do and it also saved me from doing alot of dumb bullshit and troubles.

Like I said, whoop their asses to GET THEM UP not to BRING THEM DOWN!

Hell to be honest, I wouldn't survived through my hard living in the projects if momma weren't too hard on me cuz lord knows how cold the world out-there and if thats the price if me being tough to handle it then ma did right by me.

Thats another sign of love,,,its not always hugs, gifts and kisses,,,,there're many sides of love in my opinion. You may don't understand it but thats how my living was!

AzureStarr said:

if you didn't deserve it then why do you spank your kids.. just curious

JasmineFire said:

Yeah that may be true.I still don't see hitting kids as the answer.My parents never laid a hand on my brother,sisters or myself.We were very respectful of them because we were,not because we were afraid of them or of getting hit.If spanking your kid or "ass whupped" is the answer then why do the kids keep doing it over and over?Dosen't sound very preventive to me.Maybe from my experiences in the military or fighting all the damn time growing up I learned that physical violence is very seldom the answer.Talking it out dosent always work with some of these ignorant fucks out in the world.Sometimes you have to defend yourself or someone else.I have two cousins that are gang members over in L.A.Those two got hit with anything that wasnt bolted down.They still joined there gangs rollin around thinking there hard.Today,ones in prison doing 15 to 20 and the others there for life.The only reason I didnt end up like them was my parents moved us the hell outta that city when I was still a baby.Thats preventive.He could of beat our ass all the time,but choose to move us to a good neighbourhood.I think we learn whats effective or not by observing the actions of those around us.

crazyhorse said:

i think the point is you can talk all you want about how good or bad it is to hit kids but without raising any, you really don't know what it's like.

JasmineFire said:

Yeah,I understand the point.I just dont agree with it.There are lots of things I dont ever want to do.But I dont need to experience them to no it.

crazyhorse said:

i meant to cancel this post since i really have nothing to say about this comment. oops.
[This message was edited Sun May 2 14:47:20 2004 by JasmineFire]

JasmineFire said:

It is isnt it.

JasmineFire said:

understand crazyhorse, while i see your point, my children are no where near being afraid of me...however, when its called for, there is a time when your children must know that they have hit a dead end. the actions that they have taken will land them in "a world of shit" as i like to refer to it amongst my friends i think that your parents moving you out of an area that is maybe not the best to raise kids in was a great move on their part, i could choose to live in the city, where life is a bit more 'hard' (lord knows it would be cheaper to do that) but, in return i would have my kids faced with situations on a regular basis that could lead to difficult decisions for them. so, i made the choice to bring my kids up in a different environment than i was currently living in, thus attempting to keep them out of trouble.

these are really two separate issues though. i truely believe that where you bring your kids up can be as much of a handicap as what you do for your kids..you can give them all the love and support you want to inside the home, but if outside the home they learn hate and dishonesty, you have shot yourself in the foot. the issues we were discussing, at least the ones i was referring to are how to deal with the mistakes that children are going to make. and whether its right or wrong to spank your kids we will never know...due to all the factors that fit into the picture. who knows, i may be wrong as hell about my views on raising children but, if i do everything out of love, and do what i believe is best for them, im hoping that they turn out to be decent people capable of loving and respecting themselves and others.

We only got spanked for lying and our dumb asses would lie all the time....lol

My mother would say we weren't the brightest kids especially my brother....lawd.


And please, lets not do the "good" parents don't hit and "bad" parents hit convo. No one is talking about abuse but correction. My mother talked with us, corrected us many times without spanking but then there were times when..well....she beat our asses. I think me and my brother are sane and normal. No criminal records. College educated...blah blah blah.....so lets not do the "good" parents neva hit stuff.

crazyhorse said:

i meant to cancel that.

nakedpianoplayer said:

Its just a difference of opinion,nothing more.And I respect yours because you can talk about it like an adult.Not get all bent because another dosent agree with you.You no I think thats what buggs me the most about this place and people in general.They cant accept it when someone see's things different.They either try to change yours through arguing or blast your ideas down pushing them aside like your an idiot.