I found this the other day and I thought that Evil White Male might get a kick out of it


1. Turn signals will give away your next move. A real New Jersey driver never uses them.

2. Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you, or the space will be filled in by somebody else putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

3. Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane-change is considered going with the flow.

4. The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance you have of getting hit.

5. Never, ever come to a complete stop at a stop sign. No one expects it and it will inevitably result in you being rear ended. If you want your insurance company to pay for a new rear bumper, come to a complete stop at all stop signs.

6. A right lane construction closure is just a game to see how many people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in the left lane waiting for the same jerks to squeeze their way back in before hitting the orange construction barrels.

7. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive bodywork. New Jersey is a no-fault insurance state and the other guy doesn't have anything to lose.

8. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to ensure that your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot massage as the brake pedal pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch your legs.

9. Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to scare people entering the highway.

10. Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions and are apparently not enforceable in New Jersey during rush hour.

11. Just because you're in the left lane and have no room to speed up or move over doesn't mean that a New Jersey driver flashing his high beams behind you doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.

12. Please remember that there is no such thing as a shortcut during rush-hour traffic in New Jersey.

13. Always slow down and rubberneck when you see an accident or even someone changing a tire.

14. Learn to swerve abruptly. New Jersey is the home of high-speed slalom driving thanks to the State Highway Department, which puts potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on their toes.

15. It is traditional in New Jersey to honk your horn at cars that don't move the instant the light changes.

16. Never take a green light at face value. Always look right and left before proceeding.

17. Remember that the goal of every New Jersey driver is to get there first, by whatever means necessary.

18. Real New Jersey women drivers can put on pantyhose and apply eye makeup at seventy-five miles per hour or in bumper-to-bumper traffic.

19. Real New Jersey men drivers can remove their girlfriend's panties and bra at seventy-five miles per hour or in bumper-to-bumper traffic.

20. In the New Jersey area 'flipping someone the bird' is considered a polite New Jersey salute. This gesture should always be returned.

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[This message was edited Mon Aug 4 21:33:33 PDT 2003 by Sweeny79]
[This message was edited Mon Aug 4 21:33:49 PDT 2003 by Sweeny79]

Sweeny79 said:

crazy drivers edit
[This message was edited Mon Aug 4 21:29:52 PDT 2003 by althom]

:LOL: Are you sure these aren't from California??? :LOL:

lol no cause chico there isnt the rule about

carrying your gun in heavy traffic on the So cal freeways
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spelling edit
[This message was edited Mon Aug 4 21:32:05 PDT 2003 by Christopher]

Christopher said:

:LOL: TRUE! :NOD:

And the "I'm on my cell phone so please go around, because I can't do two things at once."

Chico319 said:

lol...but you notice when your on your cell its ok tho'

Christopher said:

I actually have a perfect driving record. Thank you very much.

Chico319 said:

well not you personally but others do that its funny,,,

me to
except for those pesky road rage charges

Christopher said:

I hate those. Thank God they haven't find the bodi.., errr, ummm stuff I threw out the window.

I've driven from NY to Florida (twice)...to Pennsylvania... and even to Texas...and the ONLY place that I seem to get mixed up & get lost is in the state of NEW JERSEY.

I'm convinced that they make those road signs confusing as hell just to get you to pay higher tolls on the turnpike as you realize hat you missed your exit and have to drive another 25 miles just to turn around!!!

Chico319 said:

..ko

i wont tell

PurpleJedi said:

THAT IS SO TRUE! The road signs make zero sense!

Sweeny79 said:

thats what ya get for living in NY's Dump

Ardeo said:

There's not much I really need to say here. I think the list says it all. Jersey Driver's are legendary. They're a strange breed of drivers, a group that reqires much study to understand. Learn their habits.

EvilWhiteMale said:

u forgot the biggest one of all no more than 3 hispanics and 3 black folks in a car on the New Jersey Turnpike, any more than that is a sure chance of getting stopped frisked and set up lol

Finess said:

no more than 3

all you need is 1

Ardeo said:

No one was talking 'bout Staten Island...

PurpleJedi said:

THANK YOU