Jokes to get you through the day

Forums > General Discussion > Jokes to get you through the day

« Previous topic

Next topic »

Page 1 of 3 12 3 >

New topic

Printable (Log in to 'subscribe' to this topic)

Author

Tweet Share

Message

Thread started 03/20/20 11:54am

EmmaMcG	Jokes to get you through the day Nail salons closed, Lash salons closed, Hair salons closed, Tanning salons closed, waxing salons closed... It’s about to get ugly out there.
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #1 posted 03/20/20 11:55am

EmmaMcG	If I had a penny for everyone who asked me to look after their dogs, I’d have a pound.
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #2 posted 03/20/20 2:09pm

kpowers

avatar

EmmaMcG said:
If I had a penny for everyone who asked me to look after their dogs, I’d have a pound.

I like that one wink

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #3 posted 03/20/20 4:01pm

EmmaMcG	At a job interview I filled my glass of water until it overflowed a little. “Nervous?” asked the interviewer. “No. I always give 110%”.
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #4 posted 03/20/20 4:03pm

EmmaMcG	A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. The judge asks her: “First offender?” She replies: “No. First a Gibson, then a Fender.”
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #5 posted 03/20/20 4:21pm

poppys	EmmaMcG said: A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. The judge asks her: “First offender?” She replies: “No. First a Gibson, then a Fender.” HAHA LoVe musician jokes. What do you call a drummer (or insert alternate instrument) without a girlfriend? homeless "if you can't clap on the one, then don't clap at all"
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #6 posted 03/20/20 4:24pm

luv4u

Moderator

avatar

moderator

Where is KingBAD with his jokes?? lol

Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture!
REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince
"I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #7 posted 03/21/20 1:43am

EmmaMcG	Today I was invited by a female janitor to smoke some weed at her apartment, but I declined. I can’t deal with high maintenance women.
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #8 posted 03/21/20 1:44am

EmmaMcG	For Christmas, I bought my husband new beads for his abacus. It’s the little things that count.
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #9 posted 03/21/20 7:58am

S2DG

avatar

EmmaMcG said:
Today I was invited by a female janitor to smoke some weed at her apartment, but I declined. I can’t deal with high maintenance women.

lol

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #10 posted 03/21/20 8:28am

kpowers

avatar

luv4u said:

Where is KingBAD with his jokes??

It's Queen Emmas' turn

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #11 posted 03/21/20 11:50am

S2DG

avatar

How does a woman hold her liquor? By the ears.

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #12 posted 03/21/20 2:40pm

KingBAD

avatar

lol

EmmaMcG said:
Nail salons closed, Lash salons closed, Hair salons closed, Tanning salons closed, waxing salons closed... It’s about to get ugly out there.

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking

STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #13 posted 03/21/20 2:41pm

KingBAD

avatar

EmmaMcG said:
If I had a penny for everyone who asked me to look after their dogs, I’d have a pound.

lol lol lol lol lol lol

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking

STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #14 posted 03/21/20 2:42pm

KingBAD

avatar

EmmaMcG said:
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. The judge asks her: “First offender?” She replies: “No. First a Gibson, then a Fender.”

lol lol lol lol

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking

STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #15 posted 03/21/20 2:43pm

KingBAD

avatar

luv4u said:

Where is KingBAD with his jokes??

can't help it if you ain't keepin up biggrin biggrin biggrin

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking

STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #16 posted 03/21/20 2:43pm

KingBAD

avatar

S2DG said:

How does a woman hold her liquor? By the ears.

lol lol lol lol lol lol

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking

STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #17 posted 03/21/20 4:23pm

EmmaMcG	I can’t believe someone broke into my garage and stole my limbo stick. How low can you go?
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #18 posted 03/21/20 4:26pm

EmmaMcG	Did you know a school of piranha can devour a child in 30 seconds? Anyway, today I lost my job at the aquarium.
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #19 posted 03/21/20 6:23pm

kpowers

avatar

EmmaMcG said:
Did you know a school of piranha can devour a child in 30 seconds? Anyway, today I lost my job at the aquarium.

Image result for batman laughing gif

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #20 posted 03/21/20 6:56pm

KingBAD

avatar

EmmaMcG said:
I can’t believe someone broke into my garage and stole my limbo stick. How low can you go?

lol lol lol lol lol lol

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking

STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #21 posted 03/21/20 7:48pm

KingBAD

avatar

luv4u said:

Where is KingBAD with his jokes??

Image may contain: possible text that says 'JOKE LIKE SHARE OF THE DAY If women are so good at multi-tasking, why can't they have a headache and sex at the same time!?'

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking

STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #22 posted 03/22/20 7:49am

EmmaMcG	The guy who stole my diary just died. My thoughts are with his family.
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #23 posted 03/22/20 7:53am

EmmaMcG	Does anybody remember the joke I posted about my spine? It was about a weak back.
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #24 posted 03/22/20 8:10am

KingBAD

avatar

EmmaMcG said:
The guy who stole my diary just died. My thoughts are with his family.

lol lol lol lol lol lol lol

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking

STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #25 posted 03/22/20 8:30am

poppys	Girlz got jokes! "if you can't clap on the one, then don't clap at all"
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator

Reply #26 posted 03/22/20 9:38am

S2DG

avatar

EmmaMcG said:
Does anybody remember the joke I posted about my spine? It was about a weak back.

falloff

Emma you're on fire here.

People, please tip your waitresses, she's here all week.

- E-mail - orgNote -

Report post to moderator

Reply #27 posted 03/22/20 9:47am

poppys	S2DG said: How does a woman hold her liquor? By the ears. related - I call my man Courvoisier, 'cause he's a likker. [Edited 3/22/20 13:02pm] "if you can't clap on the one, then don't clap at all"
	- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator