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Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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I can never remember the Roman Numerals for 1, 1000, 51, 6 and 500... IM LIVID | |
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Thieves stole a truck full of viagra this morning... Police have asked the public to keep an eye out for hardened criminals | |
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i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT... 
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE... | |
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The WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION has announced that dogs cannot contract the Covid-19 virus. Dogs previously beng held in quarantine can now be released. [Edited 3/22/20 21:39pm] VOTE....EARLY | |
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Police arrested two kids yesterday. One was drinking battery acid and the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off. | |
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself | |
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funkpill would be proud of you BRAVA!!! i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE... | |
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Last night me and my husband watched 3 DVDs back to back. Luckily, I was the one facing the TV. | |
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I just read a book about Stockholm syndrome. It was pretty bad at first but I liked it in the end. | |
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i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE... | |
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I was running in the marathon and I was leading right up until the finish line when I was hit in the eye with an apple seed. I was pipped at the post. | |
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A friend of mine has a butler who's left arm is missing. Serves him right. One armed butlers.... They can take it but they can't dish it out. | |
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i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE... | |
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[Edited 3/24/20 19:59pm] | |
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Someone left a huge lump of modelling clay on my doorstep. I don't know what to make of it. | |
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My daughter seen my husband in the front garden, slumped over the lawnmower, crying his eyes out. She asked me "what's wrong with him"? I said "he's just going through a rough patch". | |
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i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE... | |
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I recently got a new job helping out a one armed typist do capital letters. It's shift work. | |
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My doctor thinks I'm taking hallucinagenic drugs. How do I know? Let's just say a little bird told me. | |
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My friend says to me: "What rhymes with orange" I said: "no it doesn't" | |
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In court, I was found guilty of being egotistical. I am appealing. | |
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I hurt my back the other day. I was playing piggyback with my 5 year old nephew. And I fell off. | |
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By St. Boogar and all the saints at the backside door of Purgatory! |
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Apparently they cannot get the Coronavirus in Antartica. By St. Boogar and all the saints at the backside door of Purgatory! |
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Yes u are! "if you can't clap on the one, then don't clap at all" | |
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i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE... | |
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EmmaMcG said: A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. The judge asks her: “First offender?” She replies: “No. First a Gibson, then a Fender.” AHAAAA...nice🎸 |
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PurpleJedi said: Apparently they cannot get the Coronavirus in Antartica. *blank stare* |
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