it is a new day, they are back. no prob with that. welcome on back Poppys.
says the one who uses passive aggressiveness with such finesse. bolded^
[Edited 11/3/17 11:09am] | |
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yes 8!!!!! in the work place, that was his hunting ground!!!! | |
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read like trivializing. and the bolded is passive aggressive. [Edited 11/3/17 11:07am] | |
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you don't even know what passive aggressive means lol
If it was passive aggressive, I would not have said it directly to you (ie Face 2 Face) do you know what passive aggressive is?
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lol indeed | |
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this is true, but like I said, what is illegal he will be dealt with everything will not be judge illegal
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dis is grown folk talk lol sex in all | |
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lol somemo | |
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subtle insults are a sign of passive agressiveness. ^^^ | |
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lol wow, that isn't subtle that is direct: YOU STILL MUST NOT UNDERSTAND what is subtle insulting and passive aggressive about that? lol
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the statement is not needed for the point of your post to be made. lol | |
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did I ask for you to approve my post ? So no WE need to go through purplefam99 to post our opinions so it doesn't stirr someone up? If a kid/person is trying to explain something, and the person is not getting it, they say/assume "you still must not understand"
are you really offended by that
Look if you are going to get offended again, you really need to stop following me around
there is an old saying that goes "if you can't stand the heat, don't go into the kitchen" Is this 'testy'? [Edited 11/3/17 12:00pm] | |
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if they say it like that^^ they are being belittling, instead of saying perhaps "let me try this way" or "perhaps i am not being clear".
Its ok "old dogs and new tricks" that is the saying coming to mind to me. | |
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why did this become about you
let the discussion continue
again I don't tip toe because of sensitivity, so just ignore my post (directly and indirectly) why is this so hard?
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I don't believe most of this, i think the press is just making a big fuss, much more than it should be. | |
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Preach to the choir. | |
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Yeah....ok ...It's the presses fault. | |
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You are projectin yourself on this case, because you were a victim of sexual harassment. All victims do that, not their fault. But it's not fair neither. | |
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Keep lyin to yourself. | |
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yep
and in the age of the internet this is what happens...the cyber witch hunts
Feldman and Grissom did not respond to Fox News' request for comment.
Following the Dr. Oz appearance, some social media users falsely identified a man sharing the name John Grissom as Feldman's alleged predator. He wrote on Facebook about the identity confusion. "This message is to all my friends. I want you all to know Google got my picture up with my name and underneath of that they got actor. I told them I'm no actor and these people are getting on here saying I molested this actor name corey feldman. I told these people I don't know him but they refuse to believe me," the non-famous Grissom pleaded.
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2017/11/03/corey-feldman-names-his-sexual-predator.html | |
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OldFriends4Sale said:
this is true, but like I said, what is illegal he will be dealt with everything will not be judge illegal
I think you are making a clear distinction between illegal and immoral. I would say that the distinction in law does not differentiate between the two as much as it should. For example, it is not illegal AFAIK to make some filthy sexual comment to someone i.e. for a man to ask you to suck them off at work, but it is immoral. No one should ever have feel under pressure to take part in exchanging sexual favors for self promotion or for any reason. You may say these young actors were given a choice, that they could have said no (seems many did), or that the 14 year old child that the 20 something Spacey lay on top of didn't actually get raped but was allowed to leave but that is giving these filthy perverts a pass. I work in an industry where I see the consequences of abuse, and where immoral behaviour would get me sacked, even though it might not be illegal behaviour. We are making it clear that inappropriate behaviour at work, whether illegal or not, must not be tolerated. We are creating an environment where abuse victims, male and female, are empowered to speak out - and I applaud that. I genuinely don't think victims are too concerned with the distinction between illegal and immoral, that is for the public and the courts to decide. If speaking out stops just one filthy pervert from abusing their position of power and wealth then it was a voice worth hearing. [Edited 11/4/17 0:21am] | |
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I've also been thinking about Trump's statement, "When you're a star, they'll let you do anything." Unfortunately, I don't think this type of thinking is unique to Trump. When you are a star, you are surrounded by adoring fans, yes-men, people who tell you how great you are all of the time. You have some fans that would let you do whatever you wanted, just because you are a star. I think they lose the ability to be able to distinquish between those that say "yes" and those that truly just respect the art and say "no". They begin to expect everyone to just let them do whatever they want to do, because they are a star, and even if someone says "no", well who are they going to tell? No one would believe that person, some no name individual vs. the star of several well-received movies or some popular series, the star believes he/she is infallible, because they are made to believe it. Then when something like this comes out, those in the business aren't shocked, they've been seeing it play out for many years, they've heard the whispers, or they've been a victim of that star themselves. But the general public, who have not heard the whispers backstage about so-and-so A Lister, who have not seen these acts because they don't hob-knob in the same social crowds, are shocked, refuse to believe it, or think it's a witch hunt. When the in-crowd are whispering to each other, "I can't believe someone finally came forward about it." | |
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1.) Well technically 14 is not a kid. And that is the mistake even parents make in raising the sons and daughters as they get older to still see them as kids. That is why many don't won't can't talk to them about adult things such as sex, which 14 is the ripe age where sexuality for male and female is very internally real. . As said in prior posts, for most of the world and not even that long ago in the USA 14yr old girls were married and having families. With men 10yrs their senior. Still this day and definately in times not so past, when talking of women living longer than men, which was more focused on wives living longer than their husbands, was because the husbands tended to be much older. Sometimes the age of the couple was the same or close, but and established man and older was the route many women went. Not to mention the mortality rate were lots of people did not live to be even 60, humans started reproducing earlier. . So now in 1970s and 80s when we start reevaluating youth and teens and laws, ideas change. Women have more opportunities, we started looking at our ideas of women being limited and why and such. That women have more opportunities in life beyond 1. getting married 2. raising a family 3. being a homemaker. . So a lot of this is why now seeing a 14yr as a kid/child and the laws of philia came in. But for most of human history it wasn't so. . If Anthony went to the police in 1986, how would this whole situation be received? How would the American public view this situation. Kevin would be considered a deviant sexual predator because his advances were toward a male. And Anthony would be looked at as a deviant and someone who needed to be fixed. Sent to a councilor. ex-Gay ministry, sex reparative therapy or shock treatement. Even in the 80s . 2.) That is a good question, because in this world, humans(who are still animals) react to each other physically. When a stallion approaches a mare for sexual breeding, he is making an advance. The mare might not be read or want it and rebuffs his advances. He might try a few more times. Does that make his a sexual predator? A deviant? . Now this opens up a huge door, because some are saying 'well we are not animals'. Well I beg to differ. Some will come at this from a 'religious' perspective and say the human race is not animals, we are above animals etc. But the truth is whether religious or not, we are biological beings whose basic sole survival is based on EAT/DRINK SLEEP BREED/SEX, everything else is built on that. . In this situation with Kevin, Anthony was in his place, went to Kevins bedroom, and sat on Kevin's bed. So right there, lines were blurred, Kevin picked him up and laid him on the bed again. Even Anthony's language, he said 'seduce' not rape/molest/force etc And when he removed himself from the bed, Kevin did not pursue or try to force him. . Back to your question. Once the person makes it clear they don't want to go further is the point, when if the other person continues to push it, then it is sexual harrassment. . 3.) your point about 'so I should just suck it up' is not even close to what anyone said Benni. Can you repost where anyone is insinuating that? What I'm saying specifically is, humans are sexual. We are not some sci-fi beings that that have evolved into a huge brain because we have no need for sex anymore. What are the different ways we know someone is interested in us? The first thing is visual. We see someone who is Sexually appealing to us. We look at them, we try to make eye contact, etc. But if even the act of looking makes someone a deviant, then as a race we are fucked. Because I've heard plenty of women say they felt uncomfortable because I man was looking at them. At what point do we make rules against even looking at another person that we are attracted to? (and the idea of another woman looking at them, or a man looking at another man, I still don't think people are ready to deal with) . I workout, I have a pretty nice build. I was friends with a female coworker. Friends with her husband, two kids, sister etc. One summer, being all buff and such in my office, she came into put some paperwork in a slot and made a comment about my build. She immediately walked over to me with her hands out to touch me. Two other guys were in the office, and were watching this happen. I had jumped out of my chair to back away from her advances. I don't like being touch in general. I told her not to touch me. Now yes she was my friend, so I was horrified by this. But I really did not want her to touch me. And she kept pressing it, laughing etc trying to touch my abdomin, chest and shoulders. I finally had to ball up my fist and threaten to hit her to get her to stop. Now I will tell you this, if it was the other way, she would have called Human Resources or went to the division head and reported me(or any other man). A lot of guys who work out, who are bodybuilders etc have said that women think just because they work on their bodies and have muscles that they feel it is ok to just grope them and feel them. Again, if reversed, he would be a sexual predator. A female teacher was found to be having sex with a 15yr old male student. She got community service. . If someone welcomes the advances, then that is mutual. Once it is clear the other does not want it it is wrong. But can the person/should the person be viewed as 'slimy' or a sexual predator etc just because they made and advance that the other didn't want, even if the person relented when the other rebuffed them? . With this situation with Kevin and Anthony that happened in 1986 it just is not going to be a clear cut conclusion in many peoples minds. I read a few things about this. And Anthony's wording and reasoning just gives me pause. . No one is excusing anything. I think most of us are are saying, that it isn't as black n white as people too easily place things in boxes. And especially the quick jump to condemn based on one sided evidence. As I said earlier, Just in the last two years, there are men who have been in jail/on the sex offender registry for 10-30 yrs based on false claims. We just have to also think before responding to these things. As I said earlier Kevin has to be judged according a crime based on full knowledge, not allegation. . . Think even about the laws in the USA concern drinking ages. Are the laws the same state to state or do they vary? And think about all the parents that allow their kids a glass of wine or even a beer. or say they will allow it at home that way they can protect them in those boundaries. My parents gave us a little wine during special occasions and holidays. The ones that didn't like it didn't continue to drink it. We went to a church that used real red wine for communion. They still do. . Yes people are going to be bothered and disturbed and troubled by things that happen sexually. Whether the other person is the same age or not. People who are adults are troubled by sex, and sexual advances. Many different reasons why. Some religious, some traditional morals, some just because the person doesn't know who they are and what they want. There was a male student at a nearby college who was suspended from school and jailed because a female student said he raped her. But when it was all done and said, she just felt bad about the actual sex act, that come to find out she pressed for him to do on her. But he did nothing wrong, but was judged and his name was put out there. . . This is why I'm 'playing devils advocate' because people still are not using discretion in their decision making process. Just drop the hammer. Also member Luvesexy made 2 points about parents talking to their children and I added a third, that parents have to talk to their children about situation before they get into them when it comes to sex. And I don't understand for the life of my why some people argued against that.
[Edited 11/4/17 11:03am] | |
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This is a good post. And what you expressed here, is an age old story of the human race. And the A list crowd are fed by the D list crowd.
Think of Stevie Nicks ' Edge of 17 ' what is she talking about? Prince R U Legal Yet?
Michael Jackson was accused of molestation. Whether he did it or not, he paid a price. Why weren't the parents charged as well?
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I left because you were dominating the thread with one on one personal attacks, on myself and others, which have nothing to do with the topic. I returned when a few more voices chimed in. Soon the thread will be smothered completely if prior experience is an indicator. "if you can't clap on the one, then don't clap at all" | |
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I suspect if I was just a member 'dominating' would not have been a word of choice. Just because certain topics are more passionate to some than others doesn't mean anyone is dominating a thread. That is a ludicrous idea. Laurarichardson will post the most in some Estate threads, not because she is dominating it, but because she is more passionate about the topic. . I made no personal attacks. You started it in post 106:I've read your many posts and do not share your opinions.
so clearly there is problem on your end, so just stop replying to me directly or indirectly.
I've moved on from this. You said candle snuffed, I'm out. Let's stay out.
[Edited 11/4/17 11:32am] [Edited 11/4/17 11:51am] | |
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Technically and I'm sure for most of us parents, 14 yr olds are still kids. We provide for them, they are still in school, and they are not of LEGAL age. | |
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true, because that is how parents react 'emotionally' . problem is a lot of parents don't know how to let that 'kid' grow up. And he/she is still seeing them as 'kids' when they are 25. Still paying their bills, feeding them, giving them an allowance etc . Now when we talk about LEGAL age, that is a pandoras box . what is the legal age for drinking, sex, marriage, driving, drop out of schook, join the military, work. to be charged as an adult for a crime etc It varies. . The federal law establishes the age of 12 as the minimum age of consent, while the age at which there are no restrictions for consensual sexual activities is 18 (sex with someone 12-18 is not illegal per se, but can still be open to prosecution under certain circumstances).
Ages of consent in North America - Wikipediahttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of_consent_in_North_America
What is the youngest age you can get married in the United States?
Age of marriage in the United States
StateMinimum ageNotes Statutory age when all exceptions are taken into account Minnesota 16 Mississippi none females 15–21 and males 17–21 can marry with parental consent alone Missouri none Parental consent required for ages 15–17. Judicial consent required below age 15.
48 more rows
Alcohol consumption by youth in the United States of America is an umbrella term for alcohol consumption by individuals under the age of 21 in the country. Although the minimum legal age to purchase alcohol is 21 in all states (see National Minimum Drinking Age Act), the legal details vary greatly.
Alcohol consumption by youth in the United States - Wikipediahttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alcohol_consumption_by_youth_in_the_United_States
State by state the laws change as well for when someone can get married. but the LAW says different. See this stuff is why i'm just trying to get people to think outside of their emotional reaction to this Kevin/Anthony situation. If you don't kwow the law, your/our emotional reaction means nothing.
[Edited 11/4/17 11:35am] | |
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About 15+ yrs ago, I was a part of a community function/gathering that met weekly. So you got to know the people well. There was a woman who had 1 boy and 3 girls. The eldest girl was maybe around my age, the youngest 15. All the of the girls looked like grown women. The looked the age of the eldest sister who was around 25ish at the time. The girls were stacked, like they took hormones or something. You just would not know the ages unless you were told. And still might not believe it. They dressed like grown women too. I was friends with the eldest daughter. One Sunday I got a call from their house, and it was the middle sister. Make a long story short, the 15yr old was attracted to me and wanted to date me. . The world ain't so black n white about this stuff. | |
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