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Damn, It's Good To Be A Man! I mean, Damn, it's really good to be a man.
Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. You never have to drive to another gas station because this one is just too icky. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Tux rental - $100; Wedding dress $5000. People never stare at your chest when you talk to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister or mangle your feet. One mood, ALL the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a six-pack. Everything on your face stays its original color. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough You don't have to stop and think about which way to turn a nut on a bolt. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. You don't have to shave below your neck! Your belly usually hides your big hips. You can pee standing up. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons. You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives, on December 24, in 45 minutes or less. Now do you understand why men are so cheerful?   |
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moderatorAccurate list...  SUPERJOINT RITUAL - http://www.superjointritual.com
A Lethal Dose of American Hatred | |
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AND YOU HAVE BIG, HAIRY NUTS! -------
A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti... "I've just had an apostrophe!" "I think you mean an epiphany..." | |
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June7 said: I mean, Damn, it's really good to be a man.
Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. You never have to drive to another gas station because this one is just too icky. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Tux rental - $100; Wedding dress $5000. People never stare at your chest when you talk to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister or mangle your feet. One mood, ALL the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a six-pack. Everything on your face stays its original color. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough You don't have to stop and think about which way to turn a nut on a bolt. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. You don't have to shave below your neck! Your belly usually hides your big hips. You can pee standing up. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons. You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives, on December 24, in 45 minutes or less. Now do you understand why men are so cheerful? You forgot one, men can have all the sex they want and dont have to worry about getting pregnant. | |
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Paisley said: You forgot one, men can have all the sex they want and dont have to worry about getting pregnant.
Oooh...yeah... plus, we are studs if we do so, playas even... and if women do so... they're SLUTS!!! Sounds fair to me...  |
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BattierBeMyDaddy said: AND YOU HAVE BIG, HAIRY NUTS!
Why, thank you, missy.  |
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June7 said: BattierBeMyDaddy said: AND YOU HAVE BIG, HAIRY NUTS!
Why, thank you, missy. No problem, June7. I have seen the light!-------
A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti... "I've just had an apostrophe!" "I think you mean an epiphany..." | |
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June7 said: Paisley said: You forgot one, men can have all the sex they want and dont have to worry about getting pregnant.
Oooh...yeah... plus, we are studs if we do so, playas even... and if women do so... they're SLUTS!!! Sounds fair to me...  | |
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<--- watching for the female version "come-back thread" Fear is the mind-killer. | |
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teller said: <--- watching for the female version "come-back thread"
Me too!  |
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