Sorry, couldn't help posting that.

Have any of you reached a point in your life where you knew that you had to make a decision that will impact your life forever? That crossroads of life that many of us are forced to deal with? When you had to make the choice between door #1 or door#2 and either choice represents a life-altering change?

If YES;

- What prompted it?

- Was it forced upon you?

- What impact did it have upon you?

- Do you regret it?

If NO;

- Would you let your heart or your mind decide for you?

- Would you seek what's best for you personally or for the greater good?

- Would you seek counsel/advice from many, or meditate on your own for a decision?

Yes.

Uptill now I waited to decide untill I just knew. Translation = Stayed in situations that were bad for me, financially or psychologically, however, fantasizing that when I would love that person/work harder/ be better, that it will change and the situation will become good for me.

Now I know better. The other person will not change. No matter how much you try. And will certainly not change when you keep giving (why should they?)

So. I'm in limbo myself, however, don't stay when it's not good for you. Only you can change. You can't change anybody else.

PurpleJedi said:

Have any of you reached a point in your life where you knew that you had to make a decision that will impact your life forever? That crossroads of life that many of us are forced to deal with? When you had to make the choice between door #1 or door#2 and either choice represents a life-altering change?

If YES;

- What prompted it?

- Was it forced upon you?

- What impact did it have upon you?

- Do you regret it?

If NO;

- Would you let your heart or your mind decide for you?

- Would you seek what's best for you personally or for the greater good?

- Would you seek counsel/advice from many, or meditate on your own for a decision?

I think that, for most of us, there are very few situations in life where you're actually crossing the proverbial Rubicon; most things don't have that kind of finality. If I did have to make that kind of decision, I'd certainly solicit as many opinions as possible, from people I respected (couldn't hurt, right?).

The 'Personally/Greater Good' question? Too vague. Couldn't answer without more details.

Re: heart/mind:

I find that "following your heart" tends to be a metaphor for making really, really bad decisions. These decisions usually arise by taking your cues from fictional movies, TV shows, books and/or songs. Real life doesn't play out like most of those things. What did Paul Simon say? "And I ain't no fool for love songs / That whisper in my ears"? Paul Simon is a wise man.

What I can tell you is that I once thought I'd crossed the Rubicon from hope to permanent misery. Turns out I'd stumbled upon the first clue to finding happiness. Life can be funny like that.

Let me leave you with a quotation from another wise man:

Sometimes, you get the best light from a burning bridge

If you'd like to fill me on some of the details via orgNote, please feel free and I'd be glad to offer my . Not that it's necessarily worth more than that.

dJJ said:

Yes.

Uptill now I waited to decide untill I just knew. Translation = Stayed in situations that were bad for me, financially or psychologically, however, fantasizing that when I would love that person/work harder/ be better, that it will change and the situation will become good for me.

Now I know better. The other person will not change. No matter how much you try. And will certainly not change when you keep giving (why should they?)

So. I'm in limbo myself, however, don't stay when it's not good for you. Only you can change. You can't change anybody else.

Ace said:

I find that "following your heart" tends to be a metaphor for making really, really bad decisions. These decisions usually arise by taking your cues from fictional movies, TV shows, books and/or songs. Real life doesn't play out like most of those things. What did Paul Simon say? "And I ain't no fool for love songs / That whisper in my ears"? Paul Simon is a wise man.

ABSOLUTELY!!!!

I'm there right now.

I haven't reached the point where I know what I'm going to do, there are just things I'm profoundly unhappy with right now.

It is being forced upon me, so I'm pretty pissed about that.

I don't know about following my head or heart. I think I'm more following my head, because my heart says

dJJ said:

Yes.

Uptill now I waited to decide untill I just knew. Translation = Stayed in situations that were bad for me, financially or psychologically, however, fantasizing that when I would love that person/work harder/ be better, that it will change and the situation will become good for me.

Now I know better. The other person will not change. No matter how much you try. And will certainly not change when you keep giving (why should they?)

So. I'm in limbo myself, however, don't stay when it's not good for you. Only you can change. You can't change anybody else.

combination of head and heart. meditation can really help.

Nothinbutjoy said:

I'm there right now.

I haven't reached the point where I know what I'm going to do, there are just things I'm profoundly unhappy with right now.

It is being forced upon me, so I'm pretty pissed about that.

I don't know about following my head or heart. I think I'm more following my head, because my heart says

Following your head is a good thing!

PurpleJedi said:

Following your head is a good thing!

Ace said:

PurpleJedi said:

Following your head is a good thing!

...and I meant the one on your shoulders.

Otherwise things get complicated.

PurpleJedi said:

Ace said:

...and I meant the one on your shoulders.

Otherwise things get complicated.

divorce was my crossroad life changing heartbreaking went from being one person 2 becomming 4!!!

I've been there more than once.

Make the hard choice.

davetherave6767 said:

divorce was my crossroad life changing heartbreaking went from being one person 2 becomming 4!!!

Uhm...four???

PunkMistress said:

I've been there more than once.

Make the hard choice.

PurpleJedi said:

PunkMistress said:

I've been there more than once.

Make the hard choice.

I meant that choosing the harder road/option, in my experience, usually proves to be the right way when life presents you with a dramatic choice.

PunkMistress said:

PurpleJedi said:

I meant that choosing the harder road/option, in my experience, usually proves to be the right way when life presents you with a dramatic choice.

Yeah, I figured as much. And deep inside I know that the road with the bumps & bruises is ultimately the better road for the brighter future.

Doesn't mean I LIKE it.

PurpleJedi said:

davetherave6767 said:

divorce was my crossroad life changing heartbreaking went from being one person 2 becomming 4!!!

Uhm...four???

one of them got me banned 4 a month!!!!

PurpleJedi said:

PunkMistress said:

I meant that choosing the harder road/option, in my experience, usually proves to be the right way when life presents you with a dramatic choice.

Yeah, I figured as much. And deep inside I know that the road with the bumps & bruises is ultimately the better road for the brighter future.

Doesn't mean I LIKE it.

I know.

Yes, it was because I needed some answers to put the nagging questions to rest and either live with a loss or find relief and happiness.

Hope that makes sense...

I’ve never made a decision I considered “life altering” at the time, but really, every decision is “life altering” in some way or another. Choosing to take a job, where to travel, where to live, who we spend our time with, what we have for breakfast… All of it affects at least an aspect of our overall well-being.

As for the really big decisions (like moving to a different country, choosing to have children, etc.)

- Would you let your heart or your mind decide for you? My emotions are a factor but my head wins out every time. That’s just the way I work.

- Would you seek what's best for you personally or for the greater good? Generally the greater good IS what’s best for you personally if you really examine the situation. Sometimes if only because your conscious wouldn’t allow it any other way. This doesn’t mean your own needs shouldn’t be met, only that you need to truly examine both sides to see how they work together.

- Would you seek counsel/advice from many, or meditate on your own for a decision? Both. I’d talk it out with a handful of trusted friends and family, but I’d spend plenty of time thinking on my own as well.

CarrieMpls said:

I’ve never made a decision I considered “life altering” at the time, but really, every decision is “life altering” in some way or another. Choosing to take a job, where to travel, where to live, who we spend our time with, what we have for breakfast… All of it affects at least an aspect of our overall well-being.

As for the really big decisions (like moving to a different country, choosing to have children, etc.)

- Would you let your heart or your mind decide for you? My emotions are a factor but my head wins out every time. That’s just the way I work.

- Would you seek what's best for you personally or for the greater good? Generally the greater good IS what’s best for you personally if you really examine the situation. Sometimes if only because your conscious wouldn’t allow it any other way. This doesn’t mean your own needs shouldn’t be met, only that you need to truly examine both sides to see how they work together.

- Would you seek counsel/advice from many, or meditate on your own for a decision? Both. I’d talk it out with a handful of trusted friends and family, but I’d spend plenty of time thinking on my own as well.

You are too level-headed for the Org, you know that?