PurpleJedi said:

johnart said:

And even today, if we fart in front of each other it's because it slipped out.

No one should ever be so comfortable that they let loose in front of one another. That's not endearing, it's just being nasty.

Seriously now...when you've reached a certain stage with your other half, you've pretty much SEEN, TOUCHED and TASTED just about every part of his/her body.

Is a little gas every now & then such a big deal??? (Unless of course, he/she lets one rip while you're down on him/her)

Define a little gas every now and then? We're laughing hahaha OOPS

Yes, this is totally acceptable.

On the couch, I can't be bothered to move so you don't have to sit there in my shit-windstorm...no, that's just nasty and rude.

johnart said:

PurpleJedi said:

Seriously now...when you've reached a certain stage with your other half, you've pretty much SEEN, TOUCHED and TASTED just about every part of his/her body.

Is a little gas every now & then such a big deal??? (Unless of course, he/she lets one rip while you're down on him/her)

Define a little gas every now and then? We're laughing hahaha OOPS

Yes, this is totally acceptable.

On the couch, I can't be bothered to move so you don't have to sit there in my shit-windstorm...no, that's just nasty and rude.

Well DAMN...if they're that bad, then someone needs a change in diet!

Get some coloncleanse and QUICK!!!

(you know I'm just getting back at you for making me go out and set my new jeans from Kohl's on fire)

PurpleJedi said:

johnart said:

Define a little gas every now and then? We're laughing hahaha OOPS

Yes, this is totally acceptable.

On the couch, I can't be bothered to move so you don't have to sit there in my shit-windstorm...no, that's just nasty and rude.

Well DAMN...if they're that bad, then someone needs a change in diet!

Get some coloncleanse and QUICK!!!

(you know I'm just getting back at you for making me go out and set my new jeans from Kohl's on fire)

BWAHAHAHAHA!

Relationships are weird. I'm convinced our desire to participate in them is some kind of evolutionary mistake.

Cerebus said:

Relationships are weird. I'm convinced our desire to participate in them is some kind of evolutionary mistake.

I dig. I'm a romantic, but I dig.

You people seriously think about gas a lot.

NDRU said:

retina said:

It's great that you're showing Carrie how many wonderful things she has to look forward to.

how about the moment you look at the bookshelf and think "god would take forever to figure out which books are hers and which books are mine! I guess I will stay."

[Edited 10/11/10 15:45pm]

Our taste is different enough that that will never happen.

So there!

orger said:

carrie, I've said it before

I'm very happy that you've found happiness

we don't know each other

beyond these forums

but I genuinely feel very happy for you

you're a good presence at the org

you're level headed and interesting

two things that dont always go together here

congrats on your milestones

Thanks, you.

CarrieMpls said:

TotalANXiousNESS said:

Awwwwww.

The disagreement one is huge.

And like Genesia said meeting eachothers families.....

Meeting the friends, which you've already done.

How bout crying? Did he see you cry yet?

Farting in front of eachother is a big one. (I don't fart in front of Todd yet, and I still only poop when he is sleeping)

This is fun. I have to think of some more.

Yes, he's seen me cry, I've actually seen him cry.

I think THAT'S a big one.

Let's see...

* Do you eat off of one another's plate yet? Off of the same utensils? ...WITHOUT the urge to bleach them down first?

* Whether or not you decide on having kids together, there's something revelatory in seeing your partner take care of a kid or two. Their competence (or incompetence) in balancing nurturing and discipline, their ability to solve problems with spontaneity, their grace under fire... you get it all there.

* Can you be comfortably silent for a long stretch in one another's company?

* Supporting them (or vice versa) through the loss of a close relative or friend can be a big milestone. Unfortunately, death and loss has a way of really pulling survivors together. It also gives you a chance to witness your partner's grieving methods, which can sometimes entirely change a person's personality for a while.

* Seeing how they manage after a big personal victory or loss is a biggie. Do they altogether unravel and give up at not getting something they wanted? Do they become a swollen, unmanageable jackass after achieving a goal? This is where you see it.

* Have you experienced "that energy" in the air when one of you says the other's name? This is best when it comes up naturally, but sometimes you can manipulate it: Go an entire day or evening (or longer) addressing your BF generically (i.e. without calling him by name). Then, at a relatively unassuming point in conversation, punctuate a sentence with his name. I dunno what it is, but I've witnessed at least two people in my life visibly swoon when I've done this -- and they actually both commented with a sort of "Whoa, what was that!?!!"

...And I'm not a particularly smooth guy.

I may be wrong, but I figure only a certain type/level of relationship might elicit this sort of thing.

[Edited 10/12/10 7:29am]

Lammastide said:

Let's see...

* Do you eat off of one another's plate yet? Off of the same utensils? ...WITHOUT the urge to bleach them down first?

* Whether or not you decide on having kids together, there's something revelatory in seeing your partner take care of a kid or two. Their competence (or incompetence) in balancing nurturing and discipline, their ability to solve problems with spontaneity, their grace under fire... you get it all there.

* Can you be comfortably silent for a long stretch in one another's company?

* Supporting them (or vice versa) through the loss of a close relative or friend can be a big milestone. Unfortunately, death and loss has a way of really pulling survivors together. It also gives you a chance to witness your partner's grieving methods, which can sometimes entirely change a person's personality for a while.

* Seeing how they manage after a big personal victory or loss is a biggie. Do they altogether unravel and give up at not getting something they wanted? Do they become a swollen, unmanageable jackass after achieving a goal? This is where you see it.

* Have you experienced "that energy" in the air when one of you says the other's name? This is best when it comes up naturally, but sometimes you can manipulate it: Go an entire day or evening (or longer) addressing your BF generically (i.e. without calling him by name). Then, at a relatively unassuming point in conversation, punctuate a sentence with his name. I dunno what it is, but I've witnessed at least two people in my life visibly swoon when I've done this... and I'm not a particularly smooth guy.

Ya, I know exactly what you mean with this one.

CarrieMpls said:

You people seriously think about gas a lot.

...excuse me.

Lammastide said:

Let's see...

* Do you eat off of one another's plate yet? Off of the same utensils? ...WITHOUT the urge to bleach them down first?

* Whether or not you decide on having kids together, there's something revelatory in seeing your partner take care of a kid or two. Their competence (or incompetence) in balancing nurturing and discipline, their ability to solve problems with spontaneity, their grace under fire... you get it all there.

* Can you be comfortably silent for a long stretch in one another's company?

* Supporting them (or vice versa) through the loss of a close relative or friend can be a big milestone. Unfortunately, death and loss has a way of really pulling survivors together. It also gives you a chance to witness your partner's grieving methods, which can sometimes entirely change a person's personality for a while.

* Seeing how they manage after a big personal victory or loss is a biggie. Do they altogether unravel and give up at not getting something they wanted? Do they become a swollen, unmanageable jackass after achieving a goal? This is where you see it.

* Have you experienced "that energy" in the air when one of you says the other's name? This is best when it comes up naturally, but sometimes you can manipulate it: Go an entire day or evening (or longer) addressing your BF generically (i.e. without calling him by name). Then, at a relatively unassuming point in conversation, punctuate a sentence with his name. I dunno what it is, but I've witnessed at least two people in my life visibly swoon when I've done this -- and they actually both commented with a sort of "Whoa, what was that!?!!"

...And I'm not a particularly smooth guy.

I may be wrong, but I figure only a certain type/level of relationship might elicit this sort of thing.

True story: I was in an acting class a few years ago and one of the exercises we did was to tell the story of a life-changing event. Now, we had paired off ahead of time and told our stories to our partners, then pulled a piece of paper that said either "yours" or "theirs." Meaning, you were to tell either your own story - or tell your partner's as if it were your own. The other people in the class then had to decide whether you had told your own story or the other person's.

The text for the class was Sanford Meisner's On Acting. In it, he relates the story of an actress who flushed upon telling a particularly poignant personal story. In other words, she had a physical reaction that she wasn't even aware of.

So when it was my turn to tell a story, I pulled a piece of paper that said, "Yours." And the story I told was about meeting my sweetie for the first time. (It's a pretty awesome story that I won't relate right now.)

When I finished, the instructor said, "Well? Did she tell her story or someone else's?" Most of the people thought I had told my own story, but there were a couple who didn't. The instructor said, "I'm pretty sure it was her own story and I'll tell you why..."

He looked at me and said, "Are you aware of what happened to you as you told the story?" and he asked the rest of the class, "Did you see what happened? It was something physical." I said I didn't know. And he went on, "You flushed - because you went completely into that moment. It was quite lovely. I was hoping that would happen to someone."

This same instructor was there a year later, when my sweetie came with me to a picnic during the week of classes. He looked at me and said, "I get it now."

Genesia said:

Lammastide said:

Let's see...

* Do you eat off of one another's plate yet? Off of the same utensils? ...WITHOUT the urge to bleach them down first?

* Whether or not you decide on having kids together, there's something revelatory in seeing your partner take care of a kid or two. Their competence (or incompetence) in balancing nurturing and discipline, their ability to solve problems with spontaneity, their grace under fire... you get it all there.

* Can you be comfortably silent for a long stretch in one another's company?

* Supporting them (or vice versa) through the loss of a close relative or friend can be a big milestone. Unfortunately, death and loss has a way of really pulling survivors together. It also gives you a chance to witness your partner's grieving methods, which can sometimes entirely change a person's personality for a while.

* Seeing how they manage after a big personal victory or loss is a biggie. Do they altogether unravel and give up at not getting something they wanted? Do they become a swollen, unmanageable jackass after achieving a goal? This is where you see it.

* Have you experienced "that energy" in the air when one of you says the other's name? This is best when it comes up naturally, but sometimes you can manipulate it: Go an entire day or evening (or longer) addressing your BF generically (i.e. without calling him by name). Then, at a relatively unassuming point in conversation, punctuate a sentence with his name. I dunno what it is, but I've witnessed at least two people in my life visibly swoon when I've done this -- and they actually both commented with a sort of "Whoa, what was that!?!!"

...And I'm not a particularly smooth guy.

I may be wrong, but I figure only a certain type/level of relationship might elicit this sort of thing.

True story: I was in an acting class a few years ago and one of the exercises we did was to tell the story of a life-changing event. Now, we had paired off ahead of time and told our stories to our partners, then pulled a piece of paper that said either "yours" or "theirs." Meaning, you were to tell either your own story - or tell your partner's as if it were your own. The other people in the class then had to decide whether you had told your own story or the other person's.

The text for the class was Sanford Meisner's On Acting. In it, he relates the story of an actress who flushed upon telling a particularly poignant personal story. In other words, she had a physical reaction that she wasn't even aware of.

So when it was my turn to tell a story, I pulled a piece of paper that said, "Yours." And the story I told was about meeting my sweetie for the first time. (It's a pretty awesome story that I won't relate right now.)

When I finished, the instructor said, "Well? Did she tell her story or someone else's?" Most of the people thought I had told my own story, but there were a couple who didn't. The instructor said, "I'm pretty sure it was her own story and I'll tell you why..."

He looked at me and said, "Are you aware of what happened to you as you told the story?" and he asked the rest of the class, "Did you see what happened? It was something physical." I said I didn't know. And he went on, "You flushed - because you went completely into that moment. It was quite lovely. I was hoping that would happen to someone."

This same instructor was there a year later, when my sweetie came with me to a picnic during the week of classes. He looked at me and said, "I get it now."

That's an awesome story. It's amazing how those sorts of cozy, gratifying moments -- and even just recollections of them -- can have a real, physical effect on us... that even others can see.

Lammastide said:

Let's see...

* Do you eat off of one another's plate yet? Off of the same utensils? ...WITHOUT the urge to bleach them down first?

* Whether or not you decide on having kids together, there's something revelatory in seeing your partner take care of a kid or two. Their competence (or incompetence) in balancing nurturing and discipline, their ability to solve problems with spontaneity, their grace under fire... you get it all there.

* Can you be comfortably silent for a long stretch in one another's company?

* Supporting them (or vice versa) through the loss of a close relative or friend can be a big milestone. Unfortunately, death and loss has a way of really pulling survivors together. It also gives you a chance to witness your partner's grieving methods, which can sometimes entirely change a person's personality for a while.

* Seeing how they manage after a big personal victory or loss is a biggie. Do they altogether unravel and give up at not getting something they wanted? Do they become a swollen, unmanageable jackass after achieving a goal? This is where you see it.

* Have you experienced "that energy" in the air when one of you says the other's name? This is best when it comes up naturally, but sometimes you can manipulate it: Go an entire day or evening (or longer) addressing your BF generically (i.e. without calling him by name). Then, at a relatively unassuming point in conversation, punctuate a sentence with his name. I dunno what it is, but I've witnessed at least two people in my life visibly swoon when I've done this -- and they actually both commented with a sort of "Whoa, what was that!?!!"

...And I'm not a particularly smooth guy.

I may be wrong, but I figure only a certain type/level of relationship might elicit this sort of thing.

[Edited 10/12/10 7:29am]

Ooh. These are good ones.

We definitely eat off each other’s plates, each other’s silverware, all of that.

And we’ve spent long periods of time in silence, absolutely. Road trips, lazy mornings, long walks... I spent over 24 hours at his house in pajamas and without showering on a hangover day. We watched movies and he cooked for me and got take out for us and we napped…

And every time he says my name I still swoon. Or when he calls me his girlfriend. Just last weekend he was on the phone with a friend and he said “I’m at my girlfriend’s house” and I could feel myself start to blush.

Some of these others are yet to come. And that’s a nice feeling too.

CarrieMpls said:

what are some other, non-obvious relationship milestones?

You've made it to the 7-year mark with both parties being relatively content and neither one bangin' somebody behind the other's back. Congratulations: you are amongst the very small percentage of relationships to reach this milestone!

TotalANXiousNESS said:

CarrieMpls said:

6 months ago yesterday I met my bf. So naturally, I’m taking stock of where it’s all at and such.

We’ve hit some of the important, obvious milestones. We’ve exchanged “I love you’s,” we’ve been away for the weekend together, we’ve talked about whether we want to get married and have babies and as a 6^th mensiversary gift, I gave him a key to my apartment. (He really thought it was the sweetest thing ever. The funny thing is he already has a keycard to my building and the keycard to my garage - since I don’t own a car I don’t use it or my parking space. And he’ll be condo and kitty-sitting when I go to Thailand for the month of November, so I needed to get him one anyway. It was really a practical thing, but I put a bow on it and enclosed it in a card and he loved it. )

And we’ve hit some not-so-obvious milestones. He’s seen me without make-up and with greasy, messy hair in the morning, I no longer freak out about what I’m wearing and if my lip gloss is perfect if he’s on his way over, and we’ve had a disagreement or two and I no longer think about whether or not it should be “over” if he pisses me off about something.

So what are some other, non-obvious relationship milestones?

Awwwwww.

The disagreement one is huge.

And like Genesia said meeting eachothers families.....

Meeting the friends, which you've already done.

How bout crying? Did he see you cry yet?

Farting in front of eachother is a big one. (I don't fart in front of Todd yet, and I still only poop when he is sleeping)

This is fun. I have to think of some more.

Shyra said:

Have you farted in his presence?

Carrie, you really should blow one out in his presence, right away, the REAL test of love

be bold! don't hold back!

Mach said:

retina said:

I used to know a couple who every morning would always get ready in the washroom at the same time, so one would for example brush his/her teeth while the other sat on the toilet. Even they themselves said that the sexual spark disappeared soon after they started doing that. lol

again to each their own but I do not have any interest in hanging round during my partners dump/pee sessions ~

carrie, let's just disregard my previous post

PurpleJedi said:

johnart said:

Define a little gas every now and then? We're laughing hahaha OOPS

Yes, this is totally acceptable.

On the couch, I can't be bothered to move so you don't have to sit there in my shit-windstorm...no, that's just nasty and rude.

Well DAMN...if they're that bad, then someone needs a change in diet!

Get some coloncleanse and QUICK!!!

(you know I'm just getting back at you for making me go out and set my new jeans from Kohl's on fire)

x 1,000,000

I think another milestone is when you bring another lady into the bedroom. (Did I just type that!?)

CarrieMpls said:

NDRU said:

how about the moment you look at the bookshelf and think "god would take forever to figure out which books are hers and which books are mine! I guess I will stay."

[Edited 10/11/10 15:45pm]

Our taste is different enough that that will never happen.

So there!

clothes, then?

Shyra said:

CarrieMpls said:

6 months ago yesterday I met my bf. So naturally, I’m taking stock of where it’s all at and such.

We’ve hit some of the important, obvious milestones. We’ve exchanged “I love you’s,” we’ve been away for the weekend together, we’ve talked about whether we want to get married and have babies and as a 6^th mensiversary gift, I gave him a key to my apartment. (He really thought it was the sweetest thing ever. The funny thing is he already has a keycard to my building and the keycard to my garage - since I don’t own a car I don’t use it or my parking space. And he’ll be condo and kitty-sitting when I go to Thailand for the month of November, so I needed to get him one anyway. It was really a practical thing, but I put a bow on it and enclosed it in a card and he loved it. )

And we’ve hit some not-so-obvious milestones. He’s seen me without make-up and with greasy, messy hair in the morning, I no longer freak out about what I’m wearing and if my lip gloss is perfect if he’s on his way over, and we’ve had a disagreement or two and I no longer think about whether or not it should be “over” if he pisses me off about something.

So what are some other, non-obvious relationship milestones?

Have you farted in his presence?

That is a huge milestone! And, it will happen, even if by accident.

kewlschool said:

I think another milestone is when you bring another lady into the bedroom. (Did I just type that!?)

Yeah, that's not gonna be happening either.

NDRU said:

CarrieMpls said:

Our taste is different enough that that will never happen.

So there!

clothes, then?

Genesia said:

PicklesMcMillan said:

just to fart !!! no way

in the beginning i wont fart but after a while its just uncomfortable

especially if he farts in front of me but maybe because im just a tomboy

Okay, well...when you've killed every bit of romance with your stench, don't come crying to me.

Congrats Carrie! So happy for you!

I'm taking the plunge and moving in with the boy come the new year. Excited and nervous at the same time!

CarrieLee said:

Congrats Carrie! So happy for you!

I'm taking the plunge and moving in with the boy come the new year. Excited and nervous at the same time!

Congrats! That's a big step.

The other day my man was asking if I was able to rent my condo out. I told him that I could as long as I followed certain rules of my association but was wondering why he was asking. He was all, “well, if we live together someday, I’m not sure if it should be here…” :swoon:

I agreed. It’s a one-bedroom loft. Lots of room, but I don’t think it’s ideal for 2 people.

noone else is jealous of carries bf?

Birthing children together

Making a will together

Planning retirement together

enjoying grandkids together

but that's after YEARS of all these other milestones

Mach said:

Birthing children together

Making a will together

Planning retirement together

enjoying grandkids together

but that's after YEARS of all these other milestones

I don't even want to THINK about that stuff! Yikes.