1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is. ( I don't wear a watch anymore)

23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974.

That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.

Ladies.....Quit Laughing.

I really really really really needed a laugh today and just thought I would share.

I love it!! They are all funny and oh so true!!

thanks!

These are great. I laughed out loud at No. 7. I've thought that many times.

Awwww. That took 2 minutes of boredom out of my day. Thank You!

funny list!

"avoid ghetto button"

24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.

Thanks buttah...

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

That one!

Cerebus said:

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

That one!

I had a student last year who came in pissed because his mom had him do laundry and he was frustrated by the fitted sheets.

#14: I thought I was the only one!

[Edited 9/15/10 14:59pm]

butterfli25 said:

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

What if your starting point is not your own neighbourhood?

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

I don't think there will be anything to replace BluRay. There will be storage devices (like iPods) but discs/cassettes where the content is limited to one movie or album will be history. Point taken though. I don't even feel like getting BluRay. I'm fine with my dvd collection.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

Me too. lol

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

That's part of the antisocial shielding behaviour that new techonology has made possible and while it may be useful sometimes, I'd say it's more often misused. Just let your mother-in-law say a few words to you goshdarnit. It won't kill you.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

True enough. Wonder why they never thought of that?

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

I always keep asking for them to repeat it until I get it, no matter how long it takes. I want to know!

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

My pet peeve is that people never do that! I wish they did.

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

Does this person have some kinds of alien sweatless legs? And I always end up spilling on my pants too. Yogurt stains are the worst because they look like cum stains.

24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974.

That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.

Fun fact: it was the Swedish national team that started using helmets first and back then everyody laughed at them.

Just read a few so far, so funny.

*note to self*: read the rest later...

retina said:

butterfli25 said:

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

That's part of the antisocial shielding behaviour that new techonology has made possible and while it may be useful sometimes, I'd say it's more often misused. Just let your mother-in-law say a few words to you goshdarnit. It won't kill you.

Yeah, but then there's that friend of mine who is long-winded, who doesn't get, "I gotta go" and keeps talking.

When I see his number, I look at the clock to see if it's close to dinner, bedtime, or just "Not Today" time.

Take the fitted sheet by the seams, fold in to create a border as wide as the seam is, this creates an even edge to fold along.

and thanks for the giggles butterfli25

I live #20 every morning at 6:17AM...

stupid bridge...

nice

paintedlady said:

Take the fitted sheet by the seams, fold in to create a border as wide as the seam is, this creates an even edge to fold along.

and thanks for the giggles butterfli25

Lies! Hmph. It never works.

chocolate1 said:

Cerebus said:

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

That one!

I had a student last year who came in pissed because his mom had him do laundry and he was frustrated by the fitted sheets.

http://www.marthastewart....tted-sheet

My mom was a nurse, so I also know how to make beds with hospital corners.

jone70 said:

chocolate1 said:

I had a student last year who came in pissed because his mom had him do laundry and he was frustrated by the fitted sheets.

http://www.marthastewart....tted-sheet

My mom was a nurse, so I also know how to make beds with hospital corners.

Thanks!

That's basically what I do, but it still looks sloppy to me.

Since I live alone and no one goes in my linen closet, I just try to make it as neat as possible.

Cerebus said:

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

That one!

Step 1: Accept that it will never fold into a neat square.

#6.

Not only is cursive necessary, it proves the brain can do more than follow the strokes on a keyboard. and the fingers/hands can hold not only but a pen or pencil. Good one!

I think that is too great!

Thank you for posting!!!!!