Mach said:

Romance ~ A Love Affair

... while camping a few weekends ago, Michael lit about 15 large candles around the secluded campsite and we sat by the fire with the surrounding cadles softly illuminating the woods and talked about our hopes and dreams. After 25 yrs of always having/raising kids we are now moving into our honeymoon phase ... we want to travel more and experience new and different things together

THAT is Romance

Showoff!

People like you two are inspiring and keep us single folks hopeful

DexterDayglo said:

CarrieMpls said:

Well hello, Mr Bitter.

How is romance dishonest? If you honestly don't want to do nice things for your partner, then yes, I suppose any gesture is dishonest. But just 'cause you don't doesn't mean everybody works that way.

And no one said romance was effortless. Just because you have to put some effort it doesn't make it any less romantic. If anything, it makes it more so - Look what my partner is willing to do for me! etc.

I suppose the only thing i might be bitter about is how romance has been reduced to a cookie cutter package. In the dog house? Buy some flowers/ chocolates/dinner blah blah. Romance allows us to get away with being thoughtless otherwise, knowing it can be fixed with a 'traditional' gesture. You were right when you said earlier about the little something other/extra that shows thoughtfulness (foresight and imagination). As for effort, well, therein lies the rub: it shouldn't have to an effort if its part of an organic process of loving the other. One shouldn't have to feel grateful (or touched) by the actions of a so called loved one, even if it is satisfying. Having said that: Romance is too easy, because most receipients only have a tick list of expectations. Whers the fun (and honesty) in that?

I suppose every person is different in their expectations. If someone thinks they can screw up repeatedly and get out of it with a bouquet, that's not romantic in the least. So I get what you're saying.

Of course, if your partner needs improvement in the providing romance area, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with asking for your needs to be met. And if you want to please your partner, you should want to work on it. So either way, it’s an honest effort, whether it comes naturally or whether you are doing something you maybe wouldn’t normally to please your partner. After all, how can you expect them to compromise or want to do things for you for you if you won’t for them?

Of course, if it’s all one-sided, then yes, there’s an issue.

I guess I don’t have a tick list of expectations. For me it IS the little things. Recently I wrote about how awesome my bf is because he threw a sweatshirt over my head when the sun was in my eyes on a long, weary car ride home. It’s a small thing, but it shows he was looking out for my comfort. To me, that was super romantic.

Something I do? - I make dinner for my man every Tuesday. It’s kinda our in-home date night. I have dinner ready (or close to it) when he knocks on the door and I make sure to look cute and have nice music playing and then we go for a walk and hold hands or watch a movie cuddled on the couch. Maybe over time it will become an expectation or a chore but I really don’t think so as I truly enjoy cooking, I truly enjoy having someone to cook for and I truly enjoy planning a nice, relaxing evening for him/us. It’s something I consciously choose to do.

I agree its the little everyday things that are truly romantic. Grand periodic gestures turn my blood cold. I go so far as to avoid valentines and even birthday "special"celebrations. Just to prove a point.

paintedlady said:

Mach said:

Romance ~ A Love Affair

... while camping a few weekends ago, Michael lit about 15 large candles around the secluded campsite and we sat by the fire with the surrounding cadles softly illuminating the woods and talked about our hopes and dreams. After 25 yrs of always having/raising kids we are now moving into our honeymoon phase ... we want to travel more and experience new and different things together

THAT is Romance

Showoff!

People like you two are inspiring and keep us single folks hopeful

Thanx

Not having the urge to read the Org between fucking sessions when I have a date over for the night.

novabrkr said:

Whining and dining.

I'm academic.

How is whining romantic?

ernestsewell said:

Not having the urge to read the Org between fucking sessions when I have a date over for the night.

Hahahaha. I bet you been known to pick a fight just so you could storm off and org.

Romance - strictly for the benefit of the female. If women didn't like/require romance, men wouldn't indulge in it.

RebirthOfCool said:

Romance - strictly for the benefit of the female. If women didn't like/require romance, men wouldn't indulge in it.

I don't think that's true of all men. Some men like romance very much.

My birthday was pretty romantic. We went to Minneapolis - played golf that day, then he dropped me at the hotel so I could get ready while he did some "birthday" stuff.

He came back to the hotel and got ready, and we went to a lovely, romantic dinner at the Oceanaire Room. We sat on the same side of the booth (which we nearly always do) and our wonderful Portuguese waiter, Ricardo, sang fado for us.

We stopped at the Dakota for a nightcap (I don't remember who was playing that night), then went back to our hotel. I waited downstairs for a few minutes while Sweetie went upstairs. When he called me up, I walked into a room that was lit with candles, with rose petals sprinkled on the bed. He gave me an emerald and diamond ring and then we

It was pretty wonderful.

DexterDayglo said:

ernestsewell said:

Not having the urge to read the Org between fucking sessions when I have a date over for the night.

Hahahaha. I bet you been known to pick a fight just so you could storm off and org.

Let's see - hot frat boy in my bed. Or Orging.

Yeah, the I Felta Thi wins!

chocolate1 said:

What other people experience.

CarrieMpls said:

RebirthOfCool said:

Romance - strictly for the benefit of the female. If women didn't like/require romance, men wouldn't indulge in it.

I don't think that's true of all men. Some men like romance very much.

And the reason they like it is becausen they know their woman is gonna like it. Men are romantic because women like romance. If it wasn't a requirement for most women, men wouldn't be interested in doing it. Men don't need romance. Men can fuck in a shed filled with beer cans .

RebirthOfCool said:

CarrieMpls said:

I don't think that's true of all men. Some men like romance very much.

And the reason they like it is becausen they know their woman is gonna like it. Men are romantic because women like romance. If it wasn't a requirement for most women, men wouldn't be interested in doing it. Men don't need romance. Men can fuck in a shed filled with beer cans .

I don't agree with that theory, since "romance" is different to different people, heck I know some women who think sexing it up in a shack littered with empty beer cans exciting. Just choke them and talk dirty...

but seriously, romantically speaking men need to be stimulated as well. Its just different, men tend to be stimulated visually, ... if she had a pimply boils on her buttocks and vulva you guys couldn't get it up either. At least, I hope not...

[Edited 8/25/10 10:46am]

paintedlady said:

RebirthOfCool said:

And the reason they like it is becausen they know their woman is gonna like it. Men are romantic because women like romance. If it wasn't a requirement for most women, men wouldn't be interested in doing it. Men don't need romance. Men can fuck in a shed filled with beer cans .

I don't agree with that theory, since "romance" is different to different people, heck I know some women who think sexing it up in a shack littered with empty beer cans exciting. Just choke them and talk dirty...

but seriously, romantically speaking men need to be stimulated as well. Its just different, men tend to be stimulated visually, ... if she had a pimply boils on her buttocks and vulva you guys couldn't get it up either. At least, I hope not...

[Edited 8/25/10 10:46am]

Ok but that just means those type of women don't need romance in the typical flowers and candy way. And pimples on the lips is some whole different shit and has nothing to do with romance .

Right at THIS moment. Being left the hell alone.

........................I always come here when I'm in a cheery mood, eh?

TotalANXiousNESS said:

Right at THIS moment. Being left the hell alone.

........................I always come here when I'm in a cheery mood, eh?

Shit

RebirthOfCool said:

paintedlady said:

I don't agree with that theory, since "romance" is different to different people, heck I know some women who think sexing it up in a shack littered with empty beer cans exciting. Just choke them and talk dirty...

but seriously, romantically speaking men need to be stimulated as well. Its just different, men tend to be stimulated visually, ... if she had a pimply boils on her buttocks and vulva you guys couldn't get it up either. At least, I hope not...

[Edited 8/25/10 10:46am]

Ok but that just means those type of women don't need romance in the typical flowers and candy way. And pimples on the lips is some whole different shit and has nothing to do with romance .

Romance IMO equals anything that gets ya in the mood....

so men get in the mood by looking at stuff. I use the gross Montana Fishburne reference to explain how men can be turned off. For example, lingerie, perfume, shaving are all things to get men in the mood that women do for men....

Men need to be stimulated (romantisized) in order to get IN the mood.

Many men (especially grown men) need to be in the mood just like women. Different triggers, same results.

ZombieKitten said:

ladies - is it wining and dining? blowjob on birthdays?

men - is it letting her wear your jacket when she is cold? flowers and chocolate?

you may surprise each other

You are talking about the Trini kind of wining, right?

paintedlady said:

RebirthOfCool said:

Ok but that just means those type of women don't need romance in the typical flowers and candy way. And pimples on the lips is some whole different shit and has nothing to do with romance .

Romance IMO equals anything that gets ya in the mood....

so men get in the mood by looking at stuff. I use the gross Montana Fishburne reference to explain how men can be turned off. For example, lingerie, perfume, shaving are all things to get men in the mood that women do for men....

Men need to be stimulated (romantisized) in order to get IN the mood.

Many men (especially grown men) need to be in the mood just like women. Different triggers, same results.

I disagree. Anything that gets you int he mood is considerd an afrodisiac.

WTF is romance?

Serious said:

ZombieKitten said:

ladies - is it wining and dining? blowjob on birthdays?

men - is it letting her wear your jacket when she is cold? flowers and chocolate?

you may surprise each other

You are talking about the Trini kind of wining, right?

You won't even be there for another three weeks, but you are in a Trini state of mind already!

sextonseven said:

Serious said:

You are talking about the Trini kind of wining, right?

You won't even be there for another three weeks, but you are in a Trini state of mind already!

I always am in that state of mind I and I am afraid of David expecting me to wine .

For my husband and I, our idea of romance is being alone. We have four kids plus my elderly Aunt living with us, being alone is a luxury. We get away for romantic get-away weekends, as often as possible. We also treasure our alone dinners out.

SHOCKADELICA1 said:

WTF is romance?

RebirthOfCool said:

paintedlady said:

Romance IMO equals anything that gets ya in the mood....

so men get in the mood by looking at stuff. I use the gross Montana Fishburne reference to explain how men can be turned off. For example, lingerie, perfume, shaving are all things to get men in the mood that women do for men....

Men need to be stimulated (romantisized) in order to get IN the mood.

Many men (especially grown men) need to be in the mood just like women. Different triggers, same results.

I disagree. Anything that gets you int he mood is considerd an afrodisiac.

Tomato - tomato

RebirthOfCool said:

paintedlady said:

Romance IMO equals anything that gets ya in the mood....

so men get in the mood by looking at stuff. I use the gross Montana Fishburne reference to explain how men can be turned off. For example, lingerie, perfume, shaving are all things to get men in the mood that women do for men....

Men need to be stimulated (romantisized) in order to get IN the mood.

Many men (especially grown men) need to be in the mood just like women. Different triggers, same results.

I disagree. Anything that gets you int he mood is considerd an afrodisiac.

My idea of romance is just being with the one I love. Whether it's talking, or holding hands..anything that shows you care for each other and love each other beyond compare. It doesn't have to always have to be a big production. Just little moments that mean the world to both of you....

Love letters, poems, shared songs, pictures, stolen moments to say "I Love You", hugs, kisses...the list goes on and on...

Long live romance....

My man polishing the furniture and cleaning the windows/mirrors.